Chapter 27

Chapter

Twenty-Seven

Aelin woke up early and immediately started packing the kitchen. Since she had a place to stay that was available immediately, there was no point in waiting and keeping her house clean during showings. She wasn't going to fight Clark on this, which meant the sooner she got out, the better.

The more she thought about it, the more liberating it felt to remove herself from the house they had lived in together. It was his house originally, not hers. She hadn't realized how many reminders of him were everywhere she looked.

Aelin stood at the island and looked around her. She'd moved here. She'd built a life here. But she'd never been at the centre of it. It had never been hers. Once they'd moved past the love-bombing stage of their relationship, she'd orbited him, trying to be the smallest, most inconspicuous moon to his gas giant.

Since the lake, every day felt like a losing battle. The tightness in her chest returned. Her insomnia at night. Everything she'd experienced immediately after realizing Clark had cheated the second time had rushed in full force when she saw that stealth app on her phone.

She found herself sitting and staring into space more times than she could count. She went back through every note she'd taken in therapy, every journal entry, every recommendation from her therapist. Knowing something and forcing your body to comply were two different things. Every night she lay in bed, close to tears, willing her body to believe that she was safe. But it wasn't true. Her body wouldn't believe it because, deep down, she knew that no matter how much she tried, Clark would always have the ability to swoop in and knock her feet out from under her.

She wasn't safe. Her body knew it. And even though her brain understood the rational difference between running from a tiger and worrying about Clark, her body didn't. She was in a constant state of fight or flight, and knowing she couldn't trust her reactions only made her anxiety worse. It was a depressing, unstoppable, vicious cycle.

Her joints ached. She felt nauseous after every meal. Every time she looked in the mirror, she was pale and gaunt. So when her body went numb and she could barely feel her heart beating, she didn't even complain.

She was simply grateful for the respite.

Aelin opened the kitchen cupboards and began stacking plates and cups in boxes, wrapping each piece in tissue paper. It was methodical—comforting, even. By the time Amaya arrived for breakfast, she was nearly finished.

When she dropped Amaya off at the rink later that day, Tyler found her again. Ryan was using him as a messenger, and Aelin knew that somewhere, far above where she was currently drowning, she might enjoy that Ryan was thinking about her. That he was trying to help and protect her.

But she couldn't access gratitude. She couldn't access want or desire or need. Their moments in the cabin felt like a lifetime away, like she had been playing a part in some summer play. She wondered if he felt the same thing. If he had come back and visited his wife and realized that they'd been fooling themselves .

She knew the thought should be sad, but she couldn't even feel that.

Tyler gave her information for a moving company, and she called. They had been expecting her and scheduled the truck without needing a deposit.

That sent warning bells off in her head. It was too much. Ryan was sending texts and calling and doing nice things for her. Exactly like Clark had back in California.

Aelin dove into packing and cleaning. She was frighteningly efficient even while taking Amaya and Bailey on field trips. She avoided looking out the window at pick-up and drop-off.

Every morning she input the code and executed. She was a good robot.

Friday hit, and she realized that in three days, she would be loading up and moving ten minutes further north. Clark had already sent movers to retrieve the furniture he'd left in the house. She wasn't going to take a single thing that gave her Clark vibes. Bailey's bed had been a gift from a friend, so she was keeping that, but she would have chopped up her master bedroom set and lit it on fire if she didn't think she would've gotten arrested.

Aelin found a new queen bedroom set through a friend of Megan's. She was keeping the dishes because her money was running low. They were in great condition and a gift from her parents at their wedding. They were for her, not for Clark. The fact that he had eaten off them didn't mean he had any claim.

Her days passed in a blur, and by the time the moving truck arrived, she was so sick of her house she could scream. She raced around, throwing odds and ends in a final box when a knock sounded on the door. She ran to answer it and found Tyler standing on her front mat.

"Hey!"

Her mind reeled, trying to figure out how he knew where she lived. Tyler turned and pointed at the truck on the curb.

"Is it okay if we pull into the driveway? "

"We?" Aelin frowned, and Tyler's face split into a stupidly attractive grin. Though she wished she were looking at someone else's.

"The guy who owns this company is a friend of mine. I told him we'd provide the labour if he lent us the truck," Tyler said.

Aelin's frown deepened. She leaned to the side to look past him. The words he was saying finally made sense. The rest of Ryan's hockey team—some of the guys she recognized from Dusty Rose—all stood on the sidewalk in faded jeans and old T-shirts.

Her pulse zinged as her eyes locked onto the man with the messy bun, and she yanked herself back.

Tyler put his hand on the doorframe. "Since he's going to be here, I figured you'd probably want to head over to the new place. Unless you feel like we need more micromanaging."

He's going to be here. The words felt like the start to a movie trailer she desperately wanted to watch. Aelin dragged in a breath. "No. Everything is labelled either ‘donation' or ‘packing,' but I was planning to take some loads over to Value Village."

Tyler nodded. "I've got my truck. We can take care of that too." Aelin started to protest, but he held up a hand. "What good is all this muscle if we can't put it to use?"

Bailey ran up behind Aelin with her tablet. Her eyes were wide, taking in the truck and glancing around their empty house.

"Hey." Aelin smoothed her hair. "Looks like these guys have everything covered. Do you want to go out for breakfast?"

Bailey's eyes lit up. As she ran to get her shoes, Aelin turned to Tyler, her throat thick. "Will you please tell him thank you?"

____ _

Aelyn had expected the move to take all day Monday, possibly rolling into Tuesday, but everything had arrived by early afternoon. She and Bailey went back to the house and met Megan around four. They ordered pizza and cleaned until every surface sparkled. Clark had hired a company to stage the place, but she knew he would latch onto anything he could to show how she hadn't held up her end of the bargain. She took pictures of every room and sent them to Jules.

They locked up, and she gave Megan a long hug, then drove back to their new place. The townhouse was smaller than their old house, obviously, but it was nicer in a few important ways. It had upgraded appliances. The washer and dryer could handle aggressively large loads, and the dishwasher was so silent, she could barely tell it was running.

She walked in to find all their boxes neatly stacked. Her eyes immediately landed on the kitchen table. There was a vase with flowers and a notecard sitting next to it. Her chest tightened. "Aww!" Bailey ran right for them, but as soon as her fingers hit the card, Aelin snapped, "Let's go to your room, Bailes. We need to set up your bed."

Bailey looked disappointed, but she followed her down the hall. They put together her simple bed frame and organized her clothes in piles. The rest of the week was slotted for organization and cleaning. Surprisingly, Bailey was excited to unpack. It did kind of feel like playing house, and it would keep Aelin busy so she couldn't fixate on Friday morning. The nineteenth. Her final mediation with Clark.

He'd gone radio silent since she deleted the app from her phone, and that worried her more than if he'd been throwing a hissy fit. She wanted him to scream. She wanted him to show up unexpectedly and yell at her in the driveway. Any of that would show her that he believed he wasn't in control.

Aelin's back and legs ached as she finally got ready for bed and settled onto her mattress on the floor. She did not go back into the kitchen. Just as she was plugging in her phone, text messages came through from Megan.

Hey. Forgot to ask if you want to come out with us Thursday night?

We're doing a bachelor party for Jenna. You met her at the Dusty Rose.

She and Country are getting married Saturday

Details slowly began filtering into her head, things Ryan had mentioned at the lake. Country and Jenna had known each other in high school and had recently gotten back together. They were getting married at Country's ranch. Ryan had been excited about it.

She texted back.

I've got mediation on Friday. I don't think that's a good idea

Or maybe it's the perfect idea because you're going to be at home sad and alone having a panic attack.

Better than having a panic attack in front of strangers while I'm tipsy

Is it, though ?

Aelin grinned at that.

Seriously, I would love to, but Clark is MIA. I don't want to give him any reason to delay this meeting.

It's been difficult enough trying to keep this date. Given all the other shit he's pulled

Megan hearted the message.

Yeah. Sigh. I'm so sorry. I wish I could have him assassinated

Aelin snorted, wishing Clark could see that message. She sent Megan a kissing emoji, then plugged in her phone and rolled over.

For a moment, she felt a twinge of loneliness. The image of Ryan standing on the curb in front of her house. The briefest hint whispered over her that maybe she didn't have to be lying alone on a mattress on the floor.

Then the cold swept back in, and Aelin exhaled in relief.