12. Brie

CHAPTER 12

Brie

“We need to talk.”

Four words that I’ve heard too many times in my life, usually right before something bad happens. In the trailer park, it was always how my mom would start off telling me that her latest boyfriend was moving in with us. As a showgirl, it was about how I was a fraction low on my kick, and I was going to lose my place if I didn’t watch it. With Terry, it was about ditching my personal plans for the evening to play the doting wife at some event that would inevitably bore me to tears.

But when I tip my face up to Nik, she’s smiling—that rare, soft smile that makes her look less guarded. It transforms her whole face, smoothing away the sharp edges and the suspicions that haunt her eyes. In these private moments, I get to see the woman beneath the warrior, and it takes my breath away every time.

“Wow, it’s not necessarily a bad thing,” she adds, catching my expression. The springs in the couch bed protest as she shifts to pull me closer. I miss my bed at Solara again with a sharp pang. It’s gone now—ruined, if not completely obliterated. Everything’s harder here at the Golden Sands. The metal frame digs into my hip, the mattress doing nothing to cushion me.

But once again, Nik’s presence makes even this worn-out piece of furniture feel like the height of luxury.

I have no idea what time it is. I never do inside the casino, but after having been up all night and then sleeping for hours, I feel completely outside time and space. And in this place between night and day, between what might be and what is, everything feels more intimate, more honest.

Maybe that’s why Nik has chosen now to have this conversation.

“Not long ago, we agreed to cool things between us,” Nik starts carefully. Her hand rests on the blanket between us, those capable fingers that have both protected and pleasured me now picking at a loose thread, showing her nerves. “But in a very short time, we’ve become…” Her fingers stall as she searches for the right word.

“Entangled,” I supply, thinking of all the ways she’s woven herself into my life, into my heart. Like silk threads pulling tight, sewing all those different parts of me back together. And more than that. Because every touch, every shared glance, every moment she’s put herself between me and harm has tied us closer together, too.

“Entangled,” she repeats. “Yeah.” Her eyes hold mine, serious, their infinite blue so deep I could drown in them. “I need to know how you feel about that.”

The question hangs between us.

I could lie. God knows I’m good at it. Years of practice, starting with telling my teachers I’d had breakfast when there was no food at home, all the way up to getting Sophie Johnson to confirm my fake alibi.

I could give Nik some carefully crafted answer that would keep my walls intact. Keep my mask in place. It would be safer, after all. The ties that bind us could also cut me right in two. I don’t fall easy; I don’t fall at all . I’ve never trusted those feelings when they stirred, never let myself feel them. Love, to me, means failure. Betrayal.

But I know Nik would never betray me. Never fail me. I want to give her something real, and she’s more than earned my honesty.

“You’ve affected me like no other woman before,” I admit, my voice barely above a whisper. The truth feels strange on my tongue, like tasting a new dish. I’ve spent so long weighing every word that sincerity feels almost dangerous . “I didn’t think I was actually capable of feeling something this…true. This real.”

Joy blooms across Nik’s face. The sight lights up my heart, because how many people get to see her like this? She reaches for my face, her fingers gentle against my cheek as she strokes my hair back.

“That’s why it was so easy to tell Eva to shove it,” she says, and the fierce pride in her voice makes my heart skip. “Because when it came down to it, there wasn’t even a choice to make. I’d made it already. Made it the first moment I met you, even if I wasn’t aware of it.”

But then her expression shifts, concern clouding those beautiful eyes. The warrior replacing the lover, though both are equally precious to me. “I worry, though. Your position in the Colombo Family…” She pauses, choosing her words carefully. “You’re tough, there’s no doubt about that. But there are decisions you’ll have to make, things that might be harder than you expect.”

I tense, waiting for judgment, for her to tell me I’m not cut out for this life, just like all the others think. It would hardly be the first time someone has underestimated me. But that’s not where she’s going with this.

“I wonder if we should run,” she suggests softly. Her thumb massages circles on my temple, hypnotic and soothing. “Get out of here completely. Start somewhere new, somewhere safe, somewhere none of them can ever touch us. Together.”

The suggestion is everything I’ve ever wanted—safety, freedom, love—wrapped up in one tempting package. The girl from the trailer park screams at me to take it, to seize this chance at happiness, to run and never look back.

But I hesitate. Partly because I don’t want to be that sixteen-year-old girl for the rest of my life…and partly because Nik hasn’t specified love .

I’m not going to ask. And I’m not going to say it if she won’t say it, I decide.

I can’t take the risk.

But Nik seems to think I’m hesitating for another reason. “It’s not because I don’t think you can lead the Family,” she says quickly. “Hell, I know you could do any damn thing you choose to, woman. You’re a force of nature. But my first priority—and you need to understand this about me, because I can’t change it—my first priority is keeping you safe. And I’ll never stop guarding you. I couldn’t, even if I tried.”

“I know that,” I assure her. “Believe me, I know that.” I give a crooked smile, try to find the words. “But I also know what people see when they look at me,” I say finally. “A tough-as-nails gold-digger who somehow manages to look fragile at the same time.” I laugh, a little bitter. “And in some ways, they’re right. I am fragile. When things get difficult, my first instinct is always to run, to find somewhere safe to hide.”

Nik starts to speak, but I press my fingers to her lips, needing to finish. Her breath is warm against my skin, reminding me of more intimate moments. “But I don’t want to do that anymore. I’m tired of running, tired of letting fear make my choices for me.”

She kisses my fingertips before taking my hand in hers, the gesture so tender it makes my eyes sting. “You don’t have to prove anything to anyone,” she says gently.

“That’s where you’re wrong. I have something to prove to myself . And…” I hesitate, feeling the weight of secrets I’ve carried for so long pressing down on me. “There’s something I need to tell you. Something important from my past.”

Nik waits, patient and steady, while I gather my courage. I’ve never spoken about this to another soul. But her hand in mine anchors me to this moment, to this choice between honesty and hiding. “It was a long time ago,” I begin. My fingers twist in the blanket, anchoring me to the present as the past threatens to drag me under. The fabric is nothing like the silk sheets upstairs or the Egyptian cotton at Solara, but maybe that’s fitting. This story belongs to a girl who could only dream of luxury. “Back in West Virginia. Only back then, I wasn’t Brie Colombo, of course. I was Brianna Lee Marsh.”

The name feels so odd these days, like putting on clothes that don’t fit anymore. But every time I think of that name I can hear Mama’s voice echoing through the trailer park when supper was ready but I still wanted to play: “Brianna Lee! ” The way she’d drag out the syllables, make my name sound like an accusation.

Nik doesn’t push, just waits, letting me find my way through this maze of memories I’ve kept locked away for so long.

“I lived in a trailer park with my mother. I was the youngest of four. My brothers all left home early, but because I was the only girl, it was just expected that I’d stay—stay and look after Mama. She was…well, she was a hot mess.” I remember the shame of it, the way the other kids would whisper when I showed up to school in the same clothes three days running. In the end, I just stopped going to school at all.

I’m grateful for the discomfort of the bed. It keeps me here, in this room with Nik, instead of getting lost in the past.

“And she had this string of boyfriends. They got worse and worse over the years. And then one of those boyfriends…” I pause, steadying myself. “He was a real piece of work. One night when Mama was out, he tried to…”

I squeeze Nik’s hand, drawing strength from her steady presence. There’s understanding in her eyes.

“There was a knife in the kitchen. I did what I had to do to survive.”

“You did what you had to do,” Nik echoes softly.

“Mama came home, found him bleeding out. She flew over to him, told me to run and get help…” I give a scoff. “I ran, alright, but not for help. Ran away from who I was, made my way to Vegas—furthest place I could think of.” I take a deep breath. “And I reinvented myself completely. Worked on losing my accent until most folks couldn’t guess where I came from. Became a goddamn showgirl, because it seemed as far from that life as I could get, and when I saw the writing on the wall for that career, I married a man who promised me safety and security.”

Nik holds me a little tighter, and when I look into her face now, I see nothing but understanding. And yet I’m still half-waiting for Nik to…what? To look at me differently?

“I’m not sorry about what I did,” I tell her, almost defensively.

“And you shouldn’t be,” she agrees.

“You don’t think…” I break off. I don’t want to ask, because I already know that I did the right thing. And Nik understands. She’s killed before.

And still…there’s a reason I’ve never told anyone about this. A guilt that I’ve been carrying around with me all these years.

“No one else knows,” I tell her. “Not even Terry. He asked—once—what I was running from. I told him it was none of his business, but it was nothing that would ever touch him.”

It was the right answer. Terry supplied me with a parcel of identification documents, cementing me in my new life, and never asked again.

“Thank you for trusting me,” Nik says. “And please know, Brie—you did absolutely nothing wrong.”

I didn’t need to be validated…but my God, it feels good all the same. I give her a watery smile. “The thing is, Nik, I’m tired of running. I’m not a kid anymore. I’m a full-grown woman and I want to stand my ground.”

“Then that’s what we’ll do.” Her hand cups my cheek, thumb brushing my cheek “We stand and fight for what you’ve earned. The Colombo Family is yours, and I’ll be right there beside you, making sure you keep it.” The certainty in her voice makes something warm unfurl in my chest, and her smile is fierce and proud. “And you know what? Brie Colombo is going to make the Family that bears her name stronger than it’s ever been.”

I see something in her I’ve never had before: absolute loyalty, absolute faith. It terrifies me almost as much as it thrills me. Even Terry, for all his kindness, never looked at me quite like this. So I let myself sink into Nik’s strength, into the safety of being truly known and still wanted.

The girl who ran from that trailer park would never have believed she’d end up here. That she’d find not just safety and power, but something real , not the convenient arrangement she had with Terry.

But then again, she never dreamed she’d find someone worth being real for.

“Nik,” I say, almost breathless.

“Yeah?”

“I…” But I still can’t bring myself to say it to her. That one little word that terrifies me. Could destroy me if she doesn’t say it back. “I want you,” I substitute.

Her heart picks up, racing; I can feel it under my palm. “I want you, too, but?—”

I close the gap before she can finish, too scared to hear what she has to say, and kiss her into silence.