21. Arim

Chapter 21

Arim

I didn't know what to think, to feel. Though the memories were vague, thanks to Ravyn's protective magic, I knew I'd felt such grief long ago when my family had self-destructed, and again when I'd lost Lexa. Loss was a part of life. I knew that. But I'd never expected to lose Ravyn now, not when she had so much life left within her.

My rock, the foundation of who and what I was, my sister had protected me from a harsh existence during my adolescence and foray into adulthood. After, she'd done her best to create a new place for us both. She'd included me when she married into the Storm Lords, when by rights she should have left me behind to start fresh. To his credit, Faustus Storm readily accepted his wife and her younger brother, folding us into his household and including us both in his life.

Then Faustus had died. And now Ravyn followed him into the Next. I couldn't make sense of it. The only thing that felt real was the flesh and blood woman offering me solace as I clung to her slight frame. I breathed in the scent of her hair, needing to experience a sense of belonging instead of that adrift loneliness I knew all too well.

Lexa kissed my chest, offering a measure of comfort. Despite my grief, her cool touch aroused me, and my body lit from within. Wanting nothing more than to lose myself in Lexa, to forget about everything bad and focus on what was good and right in my life, I curled her slim frame around me.

"Arim?" She looked up at me with that arctic-blue gaze that had so much more warmth than I'd once thought. Affection and something deeper, I hoped.

"Love me, Blue." I kissed her. "Just love me." Our mouths met with a rightness that sparked my entire body. Her Darkness flowed into me, soothing the savage desire needing relief. My passion rose as our tongues met, and she allowed me to overtake her, submitting freely.

I groaned and bent to her neck, sucking hard, wanting nothing more than to consume her. I lifted Blue so that she rested on her knees on either side of my hips and fastened my lips to her breast. Suckling, drawing the taut nub into my mouth, I feasted on her cool flesh and the arousing moans she gave as she trembled.

I teased her breasts, pulling at her nipples, fascinated with her womanly contrasts. Lexa was cool to the touch, yet she stoked my desire higher and hotter. I felt as if I'd burn up, my cock thick and throbbing against her belly, which pressed me as she trembled.

I cupped her ass as I ground against her, needing respite but not wanting to rush this glorious sharing. I could feel all of Lexa, aware she held nothing back in her attempt to comfort as best she could. I loved her all the more for it.

Blue might not realize it, but she trusted me on a deep level like she trusted no other.

"Feel me," she rasped. Her Darkness bled through me, forcing the Light to cling to her and not to my pain. Her sudden shock of dominance called to the Darkness coiled inside me, and without at first realizing it, I rose to the challenge, taking back control.

I clenched her ass with one hand, using my other to feel the slick heat between her legs. "By the Light, you're so hot." As I drew her nipple into my mouth again, my fingers sank through the tight walls of her sex.

She groaned and pulled away from my mouth, grinding against my cock pulsing so hard it was a wonder I hadn't yet come. Blue glued her mouth to mine and breathed with me, her icy breath stirring my ardor anew. Her powerful, contradictory nature to both heal and harm had always fascinated me, just as I was enthralled by the cool feel of her skin and the boiling furnace burning inside her.

Unwilling to wait any longer, I withdrew my hand to pull her up and over my cock. She slid over me, gloving me with her warmth. I gripped her hips to force her to move up and down, losing sight of the fact that she was as willing, if not more so, to take charge as she rode me hard.

"So good, Blue. Take me deeper," I rasped, lost to the bliss overtaking reason.

Her slick flesh clasped me tighter, the ache in my balls spreading, that need to come demanding surcease. Desire flared, pushing me to control, to lash out until I received my due — Lexa's climax, Lexa's love.

I clasped her waist with bruising fingers, unable to help myself as I ground against her clit with every slap and press of our bodies. She moaned my name and thrust her tongue in my mouth, teasing, urging me for more.

In me, all of you inside me , I heard whispered in my mind. Mental images of me releasing inside her overwhelmed me until I could think of nothing but coming with her. Our bodies were so close, our energy directly aligned. I could no longer tell where my Light ended and her Darkness began.

And then I felt a distinct thrum from within, a steady haze of Darkness filling me. The seduction of true freedom beckoned, and I groaned as I took command of Lexa's body.

Fucking her mercilessly, I added a finger to her ass. Mouth, ass, pussy, she belonged to me. I devoured every inch of her until she cried out my name and spasmed around me.

Her pleasure made my own more intense, and my release roared through me in a torrent of ecstasy. Even as I emptied inside her, I felt something more want to leave me. In a moment of perfect clarity, I saw a void in Lexa's soul, that piece of her Darkness that should have been there but wasn't. As we held each other tightly, both lost in each other, I granted her everything I had.

Determined to give her back the caring she'd just given me, I subtly lent her my strength, allowing the Darkness within me to cradle the power of my Light as I filled that void in Lexa that shouldn't have been there.

Grunting with the effort, I felt another orgasm crash over me and stiffened, the push of my Dark-enshrouded Light both a pleasure and a pain as weakness stole through me. Though glad to be parted from that Darkness that secretly lived within me, I knew a moment's panic, a distinct warning that I'd made a mistake that would eventually destroy me.

But if it helps Lexa, it's not such a sacrifice to make , I told myself and grunted with pleasure when I finally finished spending inside her.

When I could focus again, I felt Lexa's breath over my chest, felt her stroking my arms and belly as her heartbeat gradually slowed. A quick look inside her showed the bright blue magic I'd expected to see earlier. I smiled, kissing the top of her head.

I still ached at thoughts of Ravyn, but joined as I was with Blue, I knew my heartache would lessen in time. The small Dark Lord on top of me would be my salvation. Just as my sister joined her husband in the Next. She suffered their separation no longer, though her people and her family would miss her dreadfully.

Snuggling into my arms, Blue surprised me with a burst of energy that felt an awful lot like love. I hummed with contentment, temporarily sidetracked from the pain of my sister's departure. When I looked down at Lexa, I saw the emotion reflected in her warm gaze that gradually turned cooler as she saw me watching her and likely realized what she was feeling.

Truth be told, I wouldn't have accepted any less from her. I wanted all of Blue, to include her suspicion and fear, her warmth at odds with her well-earned caution. She squirmed, and I sighed as she pulled away from me, leaving my flagging flesh cold without her.

"You're always making a mess of me," she grumbled, even as she cuddled on my lap again.

I smiled into her hair, happy to have her in my arms forever. Unfortunately, as the seconds ticked by into minutes, the silence between us gave way to a truth that could not be ignored.

"I'm sorry about Ravyn." Sincerity rang in her voice. "I actually liked her."

"Your magic healed her when nothing else could."

Lexa tensed. "How did you know about that?"

"I know everything." I smiled at her displeased grunt. "I thank you for giving my sister that much more time to live. If not, Sin Garu would have killed her that much sooner." I swallowed my despair, still trying to reconcile Ravyn's death against my raging need for revenge. "At least she's with Faustus now."

Lexa rolled off me and glanced away.

"What's wrong?"

"I feel your anger, Arim. After all this, I'd think you'd at least be honest with me. I'm not asking you for anything." Lexa wouldn't meet my gaze.

"I am honest." Confused, I grasped her chin and forced her to look at me. "What are you talking about?"

"You blame me for what happened to Ravyn, don't you?"

"Why would I?"

Lexa tried to leave my side, but I manhandled her in place, secretly pleased at her icy glare. I much preferred her anger to her hurt.

"As much as I hate to admit it, Sin Garu is my brother. He wants me, and he'll do whatever he can to get what he wants. No matter who gets hurt."

I stared at her, bemused by the frost of her gaze that could at turns be seductive and calming. "Lexa, you yourself said Sin Garu wants to punish me. The best way to do that would be to harm those I care about." Ravyn , my heart whispered, too late.

"I'm a Dark Lord."

"And I'm a Light Bringer, kin to the Storm Lords. My kind have fought with yours forever. It's a past we cannot change, but a future we can mold as we see fit."

"And what future is that?" Lexa asked, her expression shadowed. "This new peace between us won't last. Not when everyone you hold dear considers me the enemy."

I said nothing, thinking about the future, imagining a world without Lexa. I'd allowed mistrust to blind me once.

I wouldn't let it happen again. "Lexa, we both know you and Sin Garu are bonded by nothing more than Ini's blood. You've done more to help Tanselm and the Storm Lords than anyone could have expected, especially after how you were treated." I rubbed her shoulders, forcing her to maintain eye contact. "I'll never be able to tell you how sorry I am that I didn't believe in you — in us. But as I've said before, and I'll say again, we can't change the past. This is our future, Lexa. We're both fighting for a world without oppression, free from evil persecution. Dark or Light, we want the same thing."

"Do we?"

The Lexa I'd once known had wanted love, a family, children of her own, and a purpose in life to help others. I couldn't believe she'd changed that much about the core of her basic personality.

I frowned. "I want my people safe. I want to love and be loved. Don't you?"

She stared at me for a long moment, but eventually nodded.

Cupping her cheek, I added in a gentle voice, "I want children. I want to hold my son or daughter in my arms. I want to stand with you year after year and watch our children grow strong with love for Tanselm and its people."

Her eyes watered, and I smiled with tenderness as she blinked furiously to clear her unshed tears.

"I…" She coughed, clearly uncomfortable. "I want to be happy."

"And children wouldn't make you happy? A man who would worship the ground you walk upon wouldn't thrill you to no end?"

My little Dark Lord looked nervous, and I couldn't be more pleased. No, my Lexa hadn't changed. But breaking through those shields guarding her heart would take patience and time. I planned to give her all the time in the world, whatever I had left. I pushed aside the lingering sadness that hovered just beyond thoughts of Lexa, concentrating fully on the woman I planned to take as wife.

"You always make things so damned complicated," she suddenly snarled. "Arim, can't we just focus on the now?" Her breasts brushed my chest and made me want her all over again.

"Of course, Blue. Anything for you," I murmured and cupped her, molding her breasts in my large palms. By the Light, I loved her body.

Lexa flushed and glanced at my mouth, her stare like a physical caress. She leaned down to kiss me just as a massive influx of energy filled the room.

Without thinking, I shoved her behind me and crouched to face the oncoming threat.

Sava appeared.

I glared at the interruption. The look on the Aellein king's face promised trouble.

"Arim, I —"

"I know about Ravyn," I said gruffly, standing to an imposing height over him. It wasn't much, but I was petty enough to enjoy being slightly taller. "And I know what you did and why you did it." Before Sava could say anymore, I ordered, "Remove the shields. Now."

Sava waved his hands and mumbled under his breath.

A rush of Light returned to me in the next breath. I sighed with pleasure as I clothed both myself and Lexa before she could protest. Bad enough Sava had already seen her naked. I had no intention of gifting the shifty Aellei more of my intended's beauty.

"I'm sorry it had to come to this, but you and Lexa are stubborn creatures, to say the least." Sava's sadness made it hard to be angry with him. "Words cannot express how deeply sorry I am about your sister. But Arim, even if you'd been there, there's no way you could have stopped it from happening."

Blue stepped forward, clad in the Light Bringer warrior's garb I had given her. She now matched me wearing black boots, black trousers, and a black overtunic with red piping. My signature battledress.

Sava's brows rose as he studied us but wisely said nothing.

Lexa's scowl clearly showed her displeasure with the garb, but she, too, remained silent. Both watching me. Waiting.

"It's time to return home. Together ." I took Lexa's hand in mine, holding tight and daring her to protest. She said nothing, though I didn't think she was too happy at my taking charge and holding onto her. But I didn't care.

The time had come to end this war. I turned back to Sava. "Sin Garu's time is at an end."