Chapter Eleven

CHAPTER ELEVEN

A RES STARED AT HER , and a bitter silence throbbed between them.

Then, without speaking, he strode towards his study.

Odessa followed at a slower pace, her mind reeling at how two minutes could completely change the landscape of her life. But while she had a few things to explain, she wasn't giving up.

A sense of déjà vu swept over when she entered, to find Ares pacing in front of the mantelpiece.

‘You consulted a lawyer?' he rasped, his voice ice-cold shards, his eyes holding the same disbelief, formidable censure and, perhaps most shocking of all, the same pain she'd seen in his father's eyes. ‘I want to ask how you could, but what I really should be asking myself is why I believed you'd be different.'

Righteous anger stiffened her spine. ‘Don't you dare play that old nonsense with me. You know deep down that you can trust—'

He waved an imperious hand at the door. ‘You just proved conclusively that I was a fool to entertain that notion. "Have faith"?' he scoffed, but the edge of his voice was off, something resembling anguish underscoring his words.

‘So I made an appointment with a lawyer to talk through my options? So what? Don't you dare judge me for it when you would've done the same in my shoes.' She stopped, shook her head, because the most important thing between them remained unsaid. ‘I promise you I was going to cancel. I'd changed my mind about how I needed to tackle this.'

‘When?' he threw at her, his frame still frozen in brutal fury. He shook his head before she could speak. ‘Don't bother answering that. You only claim you'd changed your mind because you've been caught,' he snarled.

His wan pallor remained, but she didn't believe he was in any way diminished. Hell, she would bet good money that he was feeling immensely, powerfully vindicated right now.

Purpose such as she'd never seen before bristled from him...from the clenched fists to the taut muscles that bunched when he moved. Ares didn't intend to give an inch.

Despair weighed her down as she shook her head. ‘Just when I think we're getting somewhere you shatter my hopes.'

His head reared up, vicious emotions bristling from him. ‘You have a nerve, speaking of hopes!'

‘Do I? Even though I kept repeatedly hanging on to mine even when you pushed me into a corner? What hope did I have when you kept telling me I wasn't good enough to stay in my child's life? But I fought that. You expected me to sit back and take whatever you dish out? How is that rational?'

His jaw clenched. ‘If you were so determined to prove me wrong and stay in this marriage, why did you need to seek out a lawyer?'

She sighed in disbelief. ‘You see how that works, Ares? You demand unfailing loyalty. But what right do you have to mine when you wouldn't budge about taking away something so vitally important to me?'

‘Even if I wouldn't, you've proved that I was once again blind to trust you.'

Odessa was glad she felt numb, because it meant she didn't crumble over the fact that her heart had shrivelled to nothing. That she was witnessing the end of her marriage—a marriage that had started on extremely shaky ground and only grown shakier.

There would be a time to mourn it—perhaps far too soon and much more devastatingly than she'd feared. Because even in a half-baked marriage she had been the most intensely happy she'd ever been. But for now she raised her chin, refusing to be cowed.

‘I won't beg you to believe me. You either do or you don't. But I won't stay here to be vilified for something I haven't done. Feel free to sue me if you wish.'

He laughed, harsh and wicked enough to draw blood. ‘And be named a monster just like your father? Or is that what you were counting on? That I would slip up somehow and you could slither your way to the true freedom you want?'

It was her turn to laugh, but she snapped off the sound in under a second before the strong hysteria behind it took hold.

‘Look at me, Ares. Do I look like I'm slithering anywhere any time soon?'

When he didn't answer she turned away, viciously swallowing a sob before it could tumble free.

‘Where are you going?'

She shrugged. ‘I may not have your millions, but I have enough to check in to a hotel for a week or two. Or I'll sleep under a bridge. Who knows? All I know is anywhere you're not is good enough for me right now.'

It hurt to say the words. Badly. But her heart hurt worse. And she needed a moment or three to lick her wounds.

‘Odessa—'

‘We have nothing more to say to each other, Ares. Whatever you want to accuse me of next, feel free to tell my lawyer.'

Lies. She would be firing that particular lawyer the first chance she got. He was just a sweet old man, and he'd proved that the great Ares Zanelis could easily scare him off. She needed someone fearless in her corner for the battle ahead.

‘This isn't done,' he said, from far too close behind her.

Her fingers tightened on the door handle. The urge to look back, gorge herself on his image one more time, was overwhelming. By the skin of her teeth, she managed to suppress the temptation.

‘Put a hand on me and I'll scream the place down. I called a lawyer before. I'm not above calling the police too.'

She heard his sharp intake of breath and an extremely remote part of her almost smiled. She was willing to bet he'd never had a woman say that to him before.

Well, she was also willing to bet he'd never shattered a woman's heart quite as unassailably as he'd demolished hers.

The sense of reprieve she'd wanted withered away when she stepped out of the study, and she only made it halfway down the corridor before true reality struck her. She was walking away from Ares. From her marriage, such as it was. Her heart was ripping itself to pieces and she couldn't breathe.

Her hand shot out, clung to the wall as her legs threatened to give way.

She started when firm hands gripped her arms, but they weren't the hands she craved. Looking up into her father-in-law's eyes was difficult, but she faced him, the knowledge that she'd done nothing wrong burning within her.

‘I never... I didn't...' Her voice faltered, tears prickling her eyes.

His lips thinned, but the warmth had returned to his eyes. ‘I know.' He looked over his shoulder towards the study. ‘I heard some of what happened in there.' He exhaled deeply. ‘Putting my son in his place is one thing...opening his eyes to his faults is another. You'll have to try harder, mikros ,' he urged.

Her shattered heart twisted. ‘I don't think I can get through to him.'

His smile was edged in sadness, but the hands holding hers remained strong. Purposeful. He led her to a chair in one of the alcoves dotting the corridor, his gaze unwavering as he said, ‘You were brought together once more for a reason. I believe in you.'

Odessa watched him walk away, wishing she could resent him for the burden he'd placed on her.

The burning in her chest remained, unwilling to die. She turned her face up to the sun beating down through the windows across the hallway. She hated it shining so fiercely when her whole world had collapsed into darkness.

Nevertheless, she'd closed her eyes and was praying for strength when the study door opened and slammed, footsteps rushing into the hallway.

Evidently Ares wasn't done with saying his piece either. For better or worse, they needed to settle this once and for all.

When the footsteps skidded to a halt, she opened her eyes. To find a haggard-looking Ares staring at her.

He looked almost...desolate. Frightened. Pleading.

‘Odessa—'

She held up her hand before she could lose her courage. ‘I'm only going to say this once, Ares. Then I'm through. You don't want my love. I get it. But are you so selfish that you'd deprive my children too? What will you tell them when they ask why I'm only around part-time? Because, yes, I will fight you on full custody. Will you be able to look them in the eyes and say it's because I don't want to be with them? Or are you going to admit that you were so terrified to open your heart that you closed theirs to me, too?'

Stark disbelief flashed in his eyes, but hard on its heels came shock, then bewilderment. ‘You think I don't want your love?' he rasped, in a bleak, shattered voice.

Her fists bunched in her lap and she cautioned herself to breathe .

‘Yes. I most certainly do. You've been pushing me away since you turned up at my father's graveside in Alghero. You've used one excuse after another to hold me at arm's length. The moment you could you left Zanzibar, leaving me to chase after you.'

He laughed, a caustic sound that electrified her every nerve-ending.

‘You make me sound...' He stopped, took a chest-heaving breath, then shook his head. ‘This is far more than just a childish I-pull-your-hair-because-I-like-you playground tactic.'

‘You're damn right it is,' she stressed, through teeth gritted so her emotions didn't spill out like a pricked balloon. ‘This is my life you're messing with. I know it doesn't mean that much to you, but—'

‘No!'

The vehemence of his tone snatched her breath away. Then a red haze wove over her eyes. ‘Excuse me? What do you mean, no ?'

‘I mean no, you're not allowed to think for single second that your life doesn't mean that much to me. Not when every damn minute since the moment I set eyes on you you've filled my mind. You've haunted me every single day and night since. I can't make a decision without wondering how you will feel about it. I can't buy a property without wondering whether you would like it, how you would design it if we were together. Thee mou... You only need to look at everything I've built and own and you'll find yourself in there somewhere.'

She swallowed, a seismic shift occurring inside her at the knowledge that she'd guessed right all those weeks ago when she saw the name of the tower.

But that didn't mean... Did it?

‘In the months after I left Alghero I could barely function without you.'

Her eyes widened, but the acid in his voice killed her rising elation.

‘I'm so sorry that was a hardship for you,' she said.

His hand slashed the air. ‘You are a living organism that lives within me. The blood that runs in my veins. I can't take a breath without you. And you... You think I don't love you?'

‘ Stronzo! I'm not a damn psychic! I can't read your mind. And your words and actions have left a lot to be desired.'

His eyes widened. ‘Did you just call me an A-hole?'

She stumbled to her feet, glared at him when he jerked towards her, his hands shooting out. ‘Yes! Because you deserve it. How was I to know you loved me when you threatened to take away one of the very things we dreamed about? Growing a family together?'

Anguish and shame creased his face. ‘It was a knee-jerk reaction to the blows I've been dealt before. I thought I needed to safeguard my heart that already belonged to you. When you rejected our agreement so vehemently I welcomed it, because it meant that you'd stay and fight long after the children were born. That I would have you around one way or another.'

‘Let me get this straight... You were willing to tear my heart out of my chest just to test my loyalty and devotion and to keep me around?'

He stared at her with stark intensity for several seconds, then turned and strode towards his study.

Curious despite herself, she followed, to find him at his desk, rummaging through the papers before he turned with a document in his hand. Striding back, he thrust it at her.

She took it, but didn't remove her gaze from his face. ‘Tell me what it says,' she ordered, and the fight in her tone made his eyes widen. ‘Now,' she insisted—then gasped when her baby kicked, as if demanding to be heard too.

Ares's eyes grew wider, his hands shooting out reflexively. ‘Odessa...?'

‘It's just the baby kicking. He's not happy right now, and I don't blame him. I'm far from happy with you myself.'

He swallowed, a wave of jagged emotion that closely resembled panic sweeping over his face. ‘That document changes the terms of our agreement.'

‘Changes it how?' she demanded.

‘There's no time limit on our marriage. You can either leave now...or never. If that's what you...'

He stopped and sucked in a long, shaky breath, and had it been any other time Odessa might have been stunned by this visible show of vulnerability.

But right now she wanted to get to the bottom of their discussion. Because her heart was straining at the bonds tying it down, and the power of that straining was fired up by hope.

Hope she wasn't going to let take over.

Not yet.

Perhaps never.

‘And there's no petition for full custody,' he went on. ‘If you decide to leave after our child is born there'll be no constraints on your participation in his life.'

She swallowed the lump that had been forming at his words. ‘You said child—not children. You're willing to let me walk away after he's born? What if I decide to take him with me?'

She noticed the way his eyes shone whenever she referred to their child, the pulse of love that gleamed for a single moment. But she didn't let that sway her.

Not yet.

‘Ne,' he confirmed. ‘Whatever you want. As long as you don't stop me from playing a part in his life.' His face tightened with pain. ‘I couldn't bear that.'

Neither could she. Her fingers shook as she grasped the document tighter. ‘So what you're saying is that you've changed your mind about everything you wanted without bothering to consult me?'

‘Odessa—'

‘What makes you think I want just one child? You know that I hated growing up alone! That, like you, I wanted to find healing in a big family who love and care for each other. That I want to be the kind of mother we both wanted for our children.'

The hand he speared through his hair visibly shook. ‘I was too afraid to hope for it, Odessa. What my father and I went through...' He stopped, and swallowed, then exhaled heavily. ‘I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy. And even the smallest possibility that it could happen again was unthinkable to me. It was easier to build my life around the fact that it would one day manifest in some shape or form and take steps to guard myself against it.'

She tossed the paper away, pain ripping her apart. ‘You know what I went through with my own father. What he did to my mother. How could you think that I would ever do something like that to my own child?'

A flash of shame darted over his face. ‘I didn't. Not for the most part. But...cruelty isn't the only weapon. When I fell deeper in love with you I felt a different sort of terror. How could you love me back when I had put my own goals in front of your desires?' he said in a barely audible rasp.

He squeezed his eyes shut, both hands gripping his nape in a move of despair so unlike him her shattered heart bled—not for herself this time, but for him.

‘I've ruined everything, haven't I?' he asked bleakly.

Her eyes fell to the paper on the floor, then she grasped his hands as he lowered them. ‘All you had to do was let me in, Ares. Talk me through what you were feeling. Then I would have told you that I've never stopped loving you. Not when I was sixteen and too shy to talk to the boy with the golden hazel eyes. Nor when I turned seventeen and lay with you beneath the stars, knowing it was the happiest time of my life so far. Not even when you left without saying goodbye and I cried myself to sleep for months. And I love you now because you have fulfilled one of my many dreams by becoming the father of the child I always hoped to have. All that is left now is for you to fulfil my greatest wish. Be the love of my life that I've prayed you'd be from the moment I saw you.'

His jaw had been gaping since she'd started speaking. Now he stared, wide-eyed, as if she was the most entrancing thing he'd ever seen, his fingers tightening around hers.

‘ Thee mou , Odessa...'

‘Don't keep me waiting, Ares,' she implored desperately. ‘Make my dreams come true. Please.'

He took a single lunge towards her and swept her into his arms, a shudder moving through him as he folded her close. ‘Yes. I don't deserve you, but... Please... Yes. To every single one of them. My remaining years will be devoted to you and our child...our children. I love you so much, Odessa. I'm so sorry I let the past get in the way of our future.'

She pulled back far enough to cradle his jaw. ‘And I'm so sorry about what happened to your sister.'

His eyes glittered with emotion and he swallowed before he nodded. ‘I've tortured myself with whether I could've done more...'

‘You were a child yourself. And Sergios needs to forgive himself for not reading the signs earlier. It's time for you both to live the life she would've wanted you to. Remember her with love, not with pain, and honour her by being happy.'

He pressed his forehead to hers. ‘I almost let my fears get in the way. For that I'm sorry, eros mou .'

She indicated the piece of paper. ‘You were prepared to sacrifice your own wishes for me. It means the world to me, but I'm so glad we don't have to be apart, Ares.'

Another shudder moved through him. ‘Never. For as long as I have breath in my body we will be together. Always. '

His firm, gruff vow was sealed with a deep kiss that swept away the last of her fears and misgivings, leaving only hope and ocean-deep love.

They were still kissing, still whispering fervent words of love, when a throat was cleared.

Sergios stood on the threshold, a mile-wide smile on his face. ‘Pardon the intrusion, but spare an old man's heart and tell me this little turbulence is behind us?'

Their unborn son kicked hard, happy and content and strong enough for Ares to feel it. His face was transformed in absolute awe and, laughing at his expression, she answered Sergios.

‘It's smooth sailing ahead, Baba.'

His eyes filled at the affectionate term, and he approached, arms outstretched. After a warm, loving hug, he slapped his still-silent son on the back, nodded once, then left them alone.

Ares, his hand still on her belly, dropped another kiss to her lips. ‘I love you, kardia mou . So very much.'

‘S'agapo,' she echoed, her heart full to overflowing.