21. Iggy

CHAPTER 21

Iggy

T he room is frigid, my hands are clammy, and I feel like an idiot.

"Once you're better and out of here, I'm going to smack you up the head," my mother shouts as soon as she walks into my hospital room. Her anger quickly dissipates, replaced by a tight grip on my hands and her uncomfortable sobs. "How could you, Iggy? You're all I've got. How could you do this? Baby, don't you know how much I love you? You're my entire world."

Guilt consumes me as I gaze at the pain laced in my mother's tear-filled eyes. Knowing after my father died, she didn't have a moment to mourn because she had me to take care of me. How she'd opened up her heart and home to anyone in my life. How she'd given the man I love safety, knowing I'd regret taking it from him. Yup, knowing I am the reason my mother is in pain is the worst feeling ever.

"I'm fine, Mom. I'm going to be fine."

She lifts her bag and smacks me with it.

"Ow, what was that for?"

"For scaring me." She bends down, her blue eyes so much like my own, glaring at me. "If I ever hear you took drugs again, I'm going to kill you myself."

My lips twitch. There's my mama. Beneath my mother's loving smile and gentle demeanor lies a ferocious bobcat ready to pounce and tear apart anyone who threatens those she loves, even if the threat is from her own son.

"I'm not an addict, Mom."

Another hit from the rectangular leather purse. "I didn't say you were. I said if you ever take drugs again, you'll have a reckoning. "

I laugh at her hysterics, forgetting for a moment they rushed me to the hospital, and I was about to die from the very thing she's terrified of me doing again. The laughter dies as soon as I see him leaning against the door. He's wearing blue jeans and a crisp white cotton shirt. Someone obviously brought him a change of clothing. Probably Kaye, she'd be the first call Marley would make.

"Hey there, handsome," I say.

Marley's hollow, sunken eyes well up with tears, his ashen face reflecting the weight of his sorrow. He says nothing, just stands there with a haunted look on his face as if he's seen a ghost. Who knew just the appearance of sadness on bis face can make my heart plummet to the ground?

A heaviness settles in my chest as my mom wearily lifts herself from the chair, pressing a kiss on my cheek. She brushes her fingers against my shoulder, leaving me alone with the man that both makes my heart stop and beat. Marley Banks could make the heavens weep, gazing at his beauty. I'm gazing at the pierced, tattooed version of David or any other inspiration that caused Michelangelo to carve perfection from marble. Even now, with misery and fatigue etched on his face, Marley Banks takes my breath away.

I reach my hand out for him, but he doesn't move from his post by the door. Why is this man leaning against a doorframe so fucking attractive?

"You gonna come in or just stand there?" I ask.

"I'm scared if I come too close, I'll burn."

"Marley, come in," I demand.

He takes a hesitant step forward before stopping, and gazes at me with profound misery. I can't discern the look in his eyes, unsure what's hiding in his steel gray depths. In all the years I've known Marley, I've seen him conflicted with all the emotions known to man except for this one. His lips pressed together in a thin line, his body stiff and unyielding, his eyes darting around anxiously. Marley appears horrified.

"How could you do this?" His tone is low and menacing. "How could you make me love you and then hurt yourself?" Marley's by my bedside in two long strides. His hands tenderly cup my head as he presses his forehead against mine. "Fuck, I thought out of the two of us, it'd be me here. You got any idea how I felt when I thought I could lose you?"

I probably shouldn't be a smart-ass at this moment, but— "No, why don't you tell me?"

Marley shakes his head and cracks a smile. He brings our joined hands to his lips and presses soft kisses along my knuckles. "My heart stopped beating when I saw you convulsing on the floor. All I've been thinking about since we drove to the hospital is if you survived, I'd make it right. I promised to any deity which would listen, telling them I'll get on my knees and profess my undying love to you."

Time stands still and my heart beats frantically to where I fear it might just burst out of my chest.

Love.

Marley Banks loves me. He has an undying love for me. His feelings for me are eternal, transcending time and space. Oh god, I sound like a sixteen-year-old with his first crush. Marley makes me feel like I'm sixteen, holding my breath for the person I like to like me back. Hearing him profess such weighted emotions is a high of its own. A high nothing could ever bring down.

I brush my fingertips along the side of his jaw. "I made it. Start professing."

"I love you, Iggy. A world without you is a world I don't want to live in. As fucked up as I am, I can stand it all, but what I can't stand is losing you. I want a life with you. The whole thing. Picket fences, a dog, and maybe even a kid. Marry me, Iggy. Marry me. Be my husband."

"What?" I stutter.

"I want it all. With you."

My body feels like it's being bludgeoned as I adjust my weight and bring my face closer to his. "Okay."

"Okay?"

"Yes. Okay. Not sure about the kids, but I love you, Marley Banks. I want it all with you."