CHAPTER 21

C HAPTER 21

T amsyn moved gradually toward wakefulness, mostly still asleep and wanting to stay that way. She couldn’t remember ever being so relaxed and happy. It was because Cade was free. In a matter of days, they’d be home. She felt so warm and safe.

Surprisingly warm, in fact. Uneasily, she opened her eyes a sliver and saw Cade at very close range. His arm was draped over her waist, holding her close.

She stiffened, wondering what to do. She didn’t want to wake him when he needed sleep to help recover. Plus, blast it, his embrace felt so warm and good .

But this was wrong ! They’d always been casually affectionate in a brotherly and sisterly way. Now the fact that Bastien had convinced Cade they were married changed everything. Wondering if they would ever be easy together again, she slowly disentangled herself so she could get up.

His deep blue eyes opened and they stared at each other, both frozen. She was sharply aware of his physicality. His strength, his maleness, and the dangerous look created by his flourishing whiskers.

He broke the moment with a sharp inhalation and jerked away from her. “I’m sorry! I meant to stay on the other side of the bed.”

She gave him a crooked smile. “On a cool night, a warm body feels good.”

He swung off the bed, muttering a curse under his breath. “How long will it take you to clear the mind block? I hate being lost in my own head!”

She could only imagine how dreadful that must feel. “The process takes time and a lot of energy. We need to have breakfast first.”

“I want to know how you managed all this.” His gesture included the cottage.

“Do you remember that Rhys gave each of us a coded list of gifted people in Northern France?”

His brow furrowed unhappily. “I don’t remember that.”

“You will soon,” she said confidently, hoping that would be true. Minds were complicated and unique. “While I fix breakfast, could you take care of Zeus and bring in more fuel for the fire?”

Her request steadied him. “Of course.” When she moved into the kitchen, her gaze firmly away from him, she heard him dressing. She swung a kettle of water over the fire to heat for tea, then did a simple washup and undid her braid so she could finger comb her hair loose over her shoulders. A nice pot of tea would make everything feel more normal.

She sighed. Normal would mean arriving safely home in London with most of her family nearby, not being solely responsible for the safety and mental health of her dearest friend.

* * *

Zeus was a very soothing horse. Cade relaxed as he concentrated on feeding and grooming. He didn’t want to think how Tamsyn would soon be rummaging around in his mind. He admitted to himself that though he desperately wanted to be restored to his usual clarity and competence, he was afraid of what Tam might find. He was sure there would be emotions and crude male thoughts that would embarrass them both, and perhaps damage their relationship. But to stay in his present state was impossible.

Chopped wood was stored in a corner of the shed so he gathered a heaping armful and headed inside. When he reentered the cottage, he stacked the wood by the fireplace, then accepted the steaming hot cup of tea Tamsyn offered. He sipped it with pleasure. “Something smells good.”

“Just eggs and toast, but warm food always tastes particularly good on cool spring mornings.” Tamsyn scooped the eggs onto a pair of plain pottery plates, then added toasted and buttered bread. His portions were double hers, only reasonable since he was twice her size.

He set the plates on the table. “I can’t remember when I last had a hot meal.”

“What were you fed?”

He shrugged as he sat down. “Stale bread and cheese, mostly. The cheese was usually decent.”

Tam sat opposite him and they both dug into their eggs. When Cade’s plate was empty, he said tentatively, “I have a feeling that you’ve made many breakfasts for me.”

She nodded. “You’re quite a decent plain cook yourself.”

He drew a slow breath. “So many holes in my memory!”

“Not for much longer,” Tam said quietly. “Are you ready to have your mind restored?”

“Yes.” After a long pause, he said, “But . . . I’m worried about what you’ll find.”

“No need to be.” She smiled as she collected the dishes and moved them to the kitchen area. “We’ve known each other for most of our lives, Cade, so I doubt I’ll find too many surprises. Besides, mind healers are hard to shock.”

Maybe she wasn’t shocked by what she found in the minds of strangers, but the mind of someone she knew might be more disturbing. He couldn’t bear it if she ended up hating him, but she was his only hope of regaining himself.

Tamping down his fear, he said, “I think I’ve seen you clear someone else’s mind, but I don’t remember how it’s done.”

“The process is different for each person. You have seen me do this before and the results have always been good. At least, so far,” she said reassuringly. “Let’s move to the settle, where it’s wide enough for both of us to sit.”

“I’ll pad it with some blankets,” he suggested.

“A good idea,” she agreed. “This will take a while.”

He spread two blankets over the settle to soften the bare wood, then sat at one end. “Now what?”

“I’ll take one of your hands and place my other palm on your forehead.”

He flinched, remembering his captor’s torturing hands. “Like Bastien?”

She looked apologetic. “Sorry, but yes, that’s what works best. The difference is that I’m clearing your mind, not blocking it. I don’t think it will hurt physically, but it will probably be disturbing. Confusing. Like being trapped in a dream or a nightmare. Trust me. Soon you’ll be yourself again, but it will take time to clear away everything that isn’t you.”

He did trust her. “Then let us begin,” he said grimly.

She clasped his right hand in her left, then leaned forward and rested her warm right palm on his forehead. She must feel that he was rigid with anxiety, but she said only, “Relax, my dear. You’ll feel me inside your mind. Not much different from the way we kept in touch with each other when you were a prisoner.”

He liked the idea of that closeness because she’d been his link to sanity as well, mitigating the worst of the pain. He closed his eyes and welcomed the increased closeness between them as she gently began exploring his mind.

But this was more than the warm contact they’d maintained since he was captured. Her power brought welcome clarity, but the blazing light illuminating his mind was also intense and disturbing and shockingly intimate. His instinct was to fight this mental invasion, and it took all of his willpower not to jerk away from her hand.

Surely reading his mind, she whispered, “I know you’re not liking this, but you’re doing a fine job of allowing me in to do my work. Are you beginning to feel some lightening of the bonds?”

He realized that he could, so he gave a rough nod. “How much longer?”

“I’m not sure,” she said honestly. “The blocks are very complex and strong. But I am stronger. Keep trusting me.”

“I will.” Though the mind blocks were fading, he wasn’t sure how much more of this invasion he could take. Or how much more Tam could do; despite her calm, he sensed that her power was waning.

Dear God, how much longer?

With a final scouring blaze of light, he realized with awe that she’d done it! The blocks were gone ! He felt that his mind had been restored, exhausted but as good as ever.

With a shuddering gasp, he bent over and buried his face in his hands, breaking the physical connection between them. “That was . . . interesting,” he said in a voice that was ragged but fully his own. “You’re a miracle worker, Tamsyn, and thank God for you!”

She lurched away from him, her eyes wide and her expression shattered. “Cade?” she gasped. “I didn’t know. I didn’t know! ”