20. Rain

Chapter 20

Rain

The restaurant specialized in steak, which...well, it wasn't a shock. Beef was one of the things the Gloombringer produced in large amounts, theirs being the best and most in demand in the Summerlands. I'd been prepared for the difference in cuisine before coming to Gloombringer Castle. Mother had forced us to eat meals of nothing but various delicacies from other parts of the Summerlands.

Frost had rather memorably projectile vomited after the sweetbreads, which, I had to admit, had made me queasy as well.

I found that there, in that moment, with Adair and Caspian, I just...couldn't do it. The thought of a steak made me feel queasy all over, and they weren't Oberon and Huxley. They weren't going to store it away and use it against me later, were they?

So when the server asked what we wanted, I drew myself up and looked her in the eye. "Can I have the sweet potato and the broccoli?"

She froze for a moment, uncertain. "With . . . "

"No, just those things."

"Vegetarians," Adair said, dropping his head into his hands. "The cook said the Moonstrikers didn't want meat, and I barely even registered it. I didn't think I was going to be the one responsible for feeding you."

"Oh," the server said, with a relieved smile, clearly having thought my order was some kind of trick previously. "Vegetarian? We can do that. I'll bring bread too. Butter on the veggies okay?"

"It's fine," I agreed, taking a deep breath. It was fine. Of course it was fine. Adair and Caspian had given no indication that they wanted to judge me for anything, let alone something so minor as what I wanted for dinner.

In fact, Caspian was looking at me with his head cocked, considering rather than judging. "No meat? Like at all?"

I shook my head. "I'm not properly a vegetarian. I just don't tend to choose meat, given the option."

Caspian looked back at the menu he'd been given, cocking his head the other way. "Huh." He turned to the server, handsome grin back. "I'll try the same. I don't think I've ever had a whole meal with no meat before. Back home even pancakes come with a side of bacon or something."

"Let's make it three," Adair told her, handing off his menu.

I wanted to tell him he didn't have to give up a steak for me, but he was so perfunctory about it, no apparent hesitation or longing, that it didn't seem like a forced decision. Plus, regardless of my feelings toward Adair, that wasn't how a diplomat acted, assuring and hedging and openly worrying.

I might not be an expert as yet, but I had been trained, and I needed to remember that and act like it.

She finished and slipped out, leaving us to continue our conversation, and it was...well, it was shallow and light, but good. So much healthier than the previous night's dinner.

I'd been concerned about leaving Char and Tempest to their own devices, but they'd been thrilled to be left to have a quiet dinner in our rooms. It was a fair point—without me there, they weren't ever expected to interact with the other family heads, and frankly, that was how they preferred it. I couldn't blame them. I didn't much want to talk to Oberon or Huxley either.

Caspian, while it was clear he hadn't been trained in diplomacy, was easy to talk to. He had an easygoing nature and quick smile, and always seemed to know what to say if there was any tension. He didn't have diplomatic training, but he was rather a natural at it—I was envious, since it had taken long months of drilling points into my mind to get where I was, and Caspian seemed to fall into it naturally.

"I know you can't just pretend to give Oberon what he wants," Adair said as we were eating our potatoes, which everyone seemed to be enjoying, "but what we really need is to get through this summit, to connect enough to allow the family heads to stop Mount Slate. After that..."

"After that, we can wait for the olds to die, then we actually get our shit together and make real peace?" Caspian said more than asked, his tone more than a little resigned.

Adair winced but didn't deny the concept.

Me? I was less sure that would work. Titania and Huxley had once been friends, after all. "I struggle to foresee a situation where you and I couldn't at least talk things through," I said, motioning to Caspian, "but we don't know Florian Dawnchaser. He might turn out to be just as bad as his father."

"He's certainly a bit of a spoiled brat," Adair said, almost a mumble. Mumbling was unlike what I'd previously seen of him, but I could understand it. Who wanted to say such a thing of a future family head?

I nodded, but paused and bit my lip. "I think...I think right now, there's more to him than that. My—someone told me to ask the Dawnchaser about his other child. Or to ask Florian about his sister. Do either of you know about that?"

Caspian shrugged, shaking his head. "Honestly, all I know about the other families is shit my father says when he's drunk or high, and it's mostly mean. Dawnchaser's a snake, Gloombringer is a gutless wonder, your mom is a hottie, but chilly on a good day. Your uncle is just plain old cold as fuck and probably a virgin because he thinks he's too good for everyone. It's all about the older generation and it's all kinda...surface level, if that makes sense? Shit a lot of people around the Summerlands say, like Dad doesn't really know any of them other than by reputation."

"But he does," Adair protested. "I'm sure Oberon and Dane were friends, once."

"I think so too, from the way Dad was super pissed even thinking about him, but that was a long time ago. I think all that's left is like...it's like a shell. Something lived inside it once—a relationship, real feelings. But now that's gone. There's just a hard carapace that's a memory of what used to be there, and most of what he knows now is that. Generalities that don't mean much."

"I understand it's been a long time." I didn't know precisely how long it'd been since the families had been in regular contact, but they hadn't even spoken that I could remember in my lifetime, let alone met in person. Mother rarely even left Moonstriker Tower.

The others nodded but didn't add information. It probably didn't help that the situation would have been different for each family and looked different to them. If Mother called Dane Sunrunner once a year, she'd have told me they had a healthy relationship. She said things had fallen apart only because she had no contact with any of them.

Finally, Caspian sighed. "I'll feel this Florian guy out, see what's going on in his head. You guys...well, what's gonna happen to the Gloombringer family if something happens to Oberon? Titania's it? My dad said she was pretty chill. It's creepy, but he called her Tits."

Adair buried his face in his hands, so clearly it wasn't the first time he'd heard that horror of a nickname. After a moment, when Adair composed himself, he sighed. "I don't think Lady Titania wants the job. We have, ah, a notion, but it's not entirely settled."

And that was fair enough. Without a clear line of succession, they had to have been thinking about it. To do otherwise would have been illogical.

Caspian nodded, accepting the answer without question. "So for now, we've got you, me, and Florian. So we try to work with that. See if we can make sure what happened with our parents doesn't happen with us."

Adair gave Caspian the same look he'd given Aubrey earlier, like he was the answer to every problem in the world, and I had to stifle the same envy.

Aubrey . . .

No, that wasn't a thought for now. Caspian was right. For now, we had to focus on what we had, and the information that wasn't in question. Me, Caspian, and Florian Dawnchaser. I could only hope the younger Dawnchaser wasn't as awful as his father. One way or another, I supposed we would find out.

By the time we got back to Gloombringer Castle, Caspian was clearly about ready to pass out from exhaustion, so he excused himself to his rooms to get some sleep. On his way inside, he gave me a wink, and tipped his head in the direction of the gardens.

He was trying to help me with Adair.

Yes, whatever else happened, I thought it was a fair presumption that I'd have a friendly relationship with the Sunrunner family.

If he survives Sunrunner life , Iri said, the first time she'd interrupted my train of thought that evening. I didn't know what she meant, and clearly she was expecting that, since she expounded without being prompted. They're a rough lot, the Sunrunner. Always infighting that leads to duels that kill people. Lots of booze and drugs and parties and fast cars. I think his mother was an addict, and it killed her. Miracle he's lived this long, really. Little Caspian must be quite the survivor .

That was...fuck me, that was terrifying. I thought my childhood had had its difficulties, but I'd never been concerned about whether I was going to survive it. This wasn't a nature documentary. Survival of the fittest didn't have to apply to humans any longer; we had the ability to take care of each other.

I think the existence of Huxley Dawnchaser proves that sometimes you don't want to take care of each other , she said, and as much as I wished otherwise, I couldn't deny that she was right.

So I tried to shove the whole mess out of my head, something to consider another time, and turned to face Adair, inclining my head toward the garden. "Care to walk with me a while? I don't think I'm quite ready for bed. "

He hesitated, just a moment, then gave a strange sort of sigh, almost sounding resigned, and smiled at me. "You know what? I'd love to."

I had no idea what the hells that meant, but what was I going to say? I just smiled back and held out my elbow, which he took, and we headed toward the tall Gloombringer hedges.

"We don't have gardens quite like this back home," I told him as we strolled.

He raised a brow. "Yours are better?"

"I don't know about that. It's the Dawnchaser who have gardens famous the world over. It gets too cold in Moonstriker lands for a lot of these plants. Roses, for instance. Mother's had a few strains bred to be hardier than standard, but mostly roses won't grow back home. We have indoor gardens more, so we can control the temperature, amount of sunlight, and humidity. They're beautiful, but it's...it's a little overplanned, you know?"

He considered, then nodded. "You're thinking that on some level, we should just let nature be nature, and planning every aspect of things like that loses something?"

"Exactly!" I'd had the conversation with Mother and others in Moonstriker Tower dozens of times, and none of them seemed to understand.

It was like the collection of bonsai in my mother's office. They were beautiful. Stunning, even. But each of them was so planned, so completely curated into what she demanded of them, it had left little room for the natural inclination of the plant itself. Like testing Ember for her intelligence before adopting her. Sometimes people were different than Mother wanted, and she couldn't accept that. She had to clip and trim and test and apply pressure until they turned into what she wanted.

That's what makes you a miracle, little one. Delta trimmed and tested and bent you, and you kept springing right back into what you are. And somehow, it's even better than what she wanted you to be.

I sighed at the depressing notion of Mother thinking of me as nothing more than one of her little trees, and Adair turned to look at me, brow raised. I didn't even have a chance to formulate a response before he gave me a wry smile. "Stone being opinionated?"

Of course he understood.

"She's great, it's just a lot sometimes," I admitted.

He huffed a sigh. "Don't I know it? My Rhodri's the same. She's my best friend and I couldn't live without her, but having someone in your head giving opinions on every single thing can be...exhausting sometimes. Even close friends don't have access to every thought that crosses your mind."

I groaned. "And when she starts a tirade and confuses poor Sim—" but Adair didn't know about that. About how I had two stones in my head. No one did.

Except...he didn't act surprised, or even look at me askance, but shook his head, letting out a breath. "I don't know if I could do it. I didn't even think about being a family head, or future family head, and how it would mean having two stones before you arrived, but it sounds like more work than I could manage."

He did know. He could see my connections to them, no doubt. So he even knew that I could connect to Iri across the miles between us.

We were deep in the garden hedges, which were arranged in an old-fashioned maze, like the Gloombringer gardens were known for. It was perfect.

I grabbed his hand and pulled him into a small alcove that could have been built for nothing other than what I intended as I tugged him toward me. Drawing him into my arms, I wrapped one of them around his waist and the other, I ran up his back to rest my hand on his neck, squeezing gently. "If you want me to leave you be, you only have to say. I don't mean to?—"

This time, he kissed me. Clearly, he didn't want me to have any doubts about his feelings on the matter, because he kissed me like a man drowning, in need of oxygen that only I could provide. For a moment, I let myself be swept into the rushing river of the kiss, then I turned it, tugging him tight against me and angling his head to gain entrance between those perfect sweet lips.

He tasted like the cognac he'd had after dinner, and while I didn't much enjoy the alcohol itself, on his lips it was like ambrosia. Everything tasted perfect on Adair Courtwright.

When he pulled away, I thought for a moment he was done and he'd take his leave, not wanting to get any deeper into this than we'd both already tumbled.

Instead, he pressed me back into the hedge and dropped to his knees. I almost protested, worried about the knees of his very expensive suit, but he didn't give me time to express concern, reaching up and cupping my cock through my own trousers. I moaned, leaning into the touch, as he shoved my coat up and out of the way, then made short work of my zipper, yanking my pants and underwear down to expose my cock to the night air.

He made a soft sound, a breathed laugh, and the air ghosted over my hot skin. "Of course," he murmured before I could ask him if something was amiss. "Cock just as perfect as the rest of you. How could any part of you be less than that?"

I wanted to protest that no part of me was anything resembling perfect, but a second later, he was swallowing my cock down the back of his throat, and I couldn't do anything but slump against the stiff hedge and let him have his way.

He suctioned his tongue against the underside of my cock, then ran it around the sides, skilled in a way no one I'd been with before had ever been, and I had to keep from bucking into him. He was the one who was perfect. His mind, his heart, and his beautiful face, but also that hot wet mouth, sucking me down and down, my mind unable to focus on anything but the velvet feel of his tongue against me, laving every inch of my cock with determination.

I heard the zip of his own pants and looked down, just able to see the movement of his own arm, that distinctive jerking that said he was bringing himself off as he sucked me. I wanted to protest, to demand the right to have his cock for myself, but my thoughts scattered to the wind when he gave an especially hard suck, and I came apart.

He didn't gag or pull back, but swallowed me again and again, drinking down every drop of me before he stiffened, moaning around me as he himself came into the grass at my feet.

He leaned back, the most beautiful, lazy grin on his face, one I wanted to see again and again. In my bed. In the daylight, where I could properly appreciate it. Forever.

Well, two days into knowing him might be a little early to be deciding on forever, but...still.

Mmmm , Iri hummed in my head. Rhodri says it's not so strange, and I trust her about things like that. She says you're Matched .

I didn't have time to ask her what she meant because a moment later Adair was tucking himself away, and I didn't even get a proper look at him. He followed that with setting me to rights, zipping and tucking and even smoothing my coat back over me. He ran gentle hands over it, the embroidery of a tiger on a black background, only the orange stripes done with the needle and thread, the cat's eyes two small green jade stones.

"These are incredible. You always look like a walking piece of art." He leaned in and pressed his lips to the cloth above my navel, just beneath the tiger's head, then pressed himself up, dusting the broken bits of grass off his knees as he stood. "So much nicer than boring Gloombringer style."

"I think you look perfect." I snatched his hand up and pressed it to my lips, bits of grass and all. "But I'd love to see you dressed in Moonstriker style. You'd be beautiful. You're always beautiful."

"I don't know how you're even real, Rain Moonstriker, but you make me want things I shouldn't even be thinking about."

I pulled him close to me once more, kissing his lips before letting him go. "Then maybe you should be thinking about them, because I want them for us. I want to give them to you."

"The Gloombringer would never forgive you if I left his employ for you."

For perhaps the first time in my life, when my mother's voice in my head tried to remind me of duty, of how we needed to think of the summit first, then the family, and of ourselves last...I ignored her. "The Gloombringer is a big boy. He'd survive. As long as we can work together to save the Summerlands, I don't give a damn what he thinks of me."

One more soft kiss, and I turned to lead him back to the castle. I wasn't sure I was being rational. Given the way the families had behaved before my birth, stealing away his retainer to marry him and keep him for myself was just the sort of thing that would make Oberon continue a cold near-war with my family. Maybe even refuse to work with us to stop Mount Slate.

It would have been just like the Oberon I'd seen so far to think of Adair as a thing he owned, not a person who made his own decisions.

But in that moment, all I could think was that if that was true, there had to be another way to stop the volcano. Surely one man didn't get to dictate the future of the whole of the Summerlands.

Did he?