Chapter 125

The lightsof the city had long faded in her rearview, but Dana could still feel the tether pulling her back no matter how many miles she put between her and D.C.

After six missed calls and a slew of text messages, Dana finally answered Jake's call. It was the last message that had pierced her heart. Four little words she couldn't ignore.

Jake: Tell me you're ok.

Dana answered the next call. "I'm okay, Jake."

"Where are you?"

"I'm sorry. I-I just needed to get out of the city."

"Don't apologize. Just tell me where you are, and I'll come."

"I don't want you to."

"Dana …"

"No, I mean it. I need time or space to figure this out."

"I get that, but I thought we decided we'd figure it out together."

She was silent for so long Jake thought he lost her.

"Dana?"

"I'm here."

"Gray, talk to me."

"I can't trust myself."

"I know it sucks that you were right about Dvita. You were right about Claire. But you were right about us, too, Dana. That should count for something."

The agony in Jake's voice was killing her, but she pushed through her strangling emotions because he deserved the truth. "Jake, you're one of the things I need to figure out. And I can't do it in D.C. I see her everywhere. On the news, in my house, in you. I just need a change of scenery for now."

"Okay. I get that. Just please tell me where you are."

"Halfway to New Orleans." His silence made her keep talking. "I have an eight week grant I've been putting off. I accepted it last night."

Jake's silence told her he was digesting the painful notion that she'd known she was leaving before spending the night with him.

"I just … I think burying myself in work is the best thing I can do right now," she said. "And I think you should go to Paris."

"How did you know about Paris?" Jake asked.

"You never erased your search history on my laptop."

"I wanted to tell you …"

"I know. Now you have the time to pursue it. Your family needs you to."

"I thought I made that clear, Dana. You're my family."

Tears blurred her vision as she drove, and she quickly wiped them away. "I wish I could believe that."

"It's true."

"Maybe it is. But maybe that's not enough. Please don't come here."

Then she hung up.