Chapter 13

Pearl woke in the middle of the night, wondering what had disturbed her. She'd heard voices downstairs for what seemed like hours, and then there had been silence. Now she heard footsteps on the stairs, and she froze. Then she recognized the calm assurance of somebody accustomed to the pace and the cadence of climbing these stairs. She smiled. It was Gideon.

When the footsteps hesitated at her room, she called out, "I'm awake."

He opened the door, poked his head in, and asked, "Hey, how come you're awake?"

"I just woke up," she replied, her voice groggy. "I'm not sure what woke me. I assume it was probably you coming up the stairs that popped me awake again," she said, with a smile. "And, no, it's not your fault. It is something I'll probably just have to deal with on a regular basis for a while, after having two intruders."

He nodded. "But you're doing a great job of handling it."

"How did your meeting go?"

"We went over a bunch of information, but we just don't have enough," he said. "There's been no activity on Drew's credit cards, his bank accounts, passport, nothing."

"If he was into these shady things on a regular basis, he would probably know how to set up a new identity for himself," she suggested.

"We are aware of that," he noted, with a chuckle. "And it's something that we're looking into. Tristan has a few contacts he's already approached, checking to see if somebody with Drew's description got a new identity. We haven't gotten any hits on that yet." He shrugged. "It would be nice to think that we could check the usual transportation hubs, but we don't have the manpower needed to go through all the security camera feeds at all the airports and train stations and bus depots over an unknown period of time and involving an extended range of distance from the base. Plus, Drew still could have simply stolen a vehicle and driven somewhere."

"He also could have just holed up right here, somewhere nearby. There would be absolutely no need for Drew to go anywhere, unless he was afraid of getting caught or of somebody else finding out," she pointed out.

"That's another issue as well," he noted, "and Tesla is already running facial recognition on Drew, restricted to the base and the time since Mason was shot. That might actually uncover something faster than Drew fleeing in another way. All good points, but, if Drew is responsible for shooting Mason, is he then also responsible for setting up this entire thing, the shooting and the aftermath with these other bad actors? Or did Drew do it strictly for the money, as a hired killer, meaning someone else put him up to it? Then Drew failed to kill Mason, so he would have had to run because there's a penalty to be paid when you don't complete the job."

"What if he didn't want to complete the job? What if killing Mason wasn't the goal? What if Drew was supposed to let Mason live?"

"And there's your soft heart at work again," Gideon noted, with a smile. "Unfortunately the bad guys out there are more inclined to kill."

She shrugged. "I don't know about the soft heart, but, if it were me, and I were being forced to do it, I would make it look like as good of a shot as I could but still miss."

"Yeah, but Mason was shot in the head, which can easily be a deadly injury. He was saved by an inch or so from dying. Yet you think it could have been a forced job for the sniper?"

"Maybe," she said. "It's just a foreign concept to me that somebody would want to intentionally kill somebody like that. It boggles my mind. Besides, to hear you guys talk, everyone loved Mason."

"Not quite everyone," Gideon clarified. "And while killings like this may not show up all the time in your work or your life, they sure do with us. That shit happens all the time."

"True," she murmured, "and I'm not na?ve, especially after dealing with Betty. So forcing a sniper to kill someone is a possibility in my mind now."

"It is," Gideon agreed, staring off into the distance.

"And you should get some sleep."

He laughed. "You're right. I should be sleeping," he murmured. "That's where I'm heading right now. I hope to get some shut-eye before something else happens."

"Good."

"I did want to ask you a couple questions though," he said.

"Like what?"

"Are you serious about starting our relationship again? Or at least figuring out if we have something to start again with?"

"I don't know whether we do or not," she murmured, grateful for the darkness of the room to hide her expression, and yet she felt like the shadows wouldn't hide anything. He'd always been extremely good at reading her.

"I don't want to play any games," he stated, as he sat down on the bed with her. "I want to know if you're serious about trying again."

"Yes," she replied immediately. "I am serious, but I have no idea how to make you trust me again. I do realize that I broke that trust.… And, once broken, trust can be an incredibly hard thing to rebuild."

"It can be," he agreed, "but it can also be something that just takes a little time, then slides into being the norm again."

"That would be lovely," she whispered. "I can't begin to tell you how sorry I am for what I did, but it's been choking me ever since I came back."

"Mason getting shot was horrible, but it brought us together again," Gideon noted. "Even if we don't rekindle what we once had, we've at least found each other as friends again."

"Yes," she agreed, but inside her the bitterness spread. "However, if friendship is all you have left to give, I understand that. Yet I…" At the last moment her voice broke.

He leaned over and gave her a hug. "I'm not saying that friendship is all I want at all," he clarified, his throat thickening. "Honestly, I think that would be more painful than anything."

Privately she agreed, as she hugged him back. "I don't want to push you into something you're not ready for," she added, "and I understand that it will take some time."

"It wouldn't take that much time," he said. "Do I understand what you did? No. Will I be worried for a while that it might happen again? Possibly." Then he took a moment to add, "But I'm not prepared to spend my entire life worrying about it."

She held her breath as she waited. When he didn't continue, she muttered, "Right now I feel as if you're leaving me hanging, and I don't know what it is you're saying."

He pulled her out of the blankets, until she was sitting in his lap. "What I'm saying is this." And he lowered his head and kissed her.

*

Gideon had been thinking about Pearl all evening, ever since she went upstairs. He couldn't stand the thought of her alone in the bed, with him down there, but still, this was a business meeting, and he had to keep his head in the game. Once the guys were gone, Gideon figured she was fast asleep and so pushed off going upstairs as long as he could. Leaving her alone had gotten more difficult by the minute. With every step he took up the stairs, he argued that he should not wake her, should give her more time, should let her decide. But his mind argued with him. Bullshit, get in there, don't give her a chance to change her mind again. Lock this down so you have something to go forward with, and sort it out as you go .

It would take time before he trusted her fully again. Yet he wanted that chance to see if they still had what they'd had before. It had been wonderful between them back then, and that was one of the reasons he'd had such a hard time when she'd walked. He just couldn't comprehend it. Now he understood it a little bit more, and he had seen how unhappy and how desperate she'd been and what she'd put herself through in order to get near him again. It must have been a hell of a shock for her to discover, after she'd moved back, that he was gone. That she had then stayed and endured all the trouble Betty had dished out was even more amazing.

He couldn't imagine all the torment both he and Pearl had been through over their breakup, and he didn't want any more of that. He just wanted to find peace for everybody, and that meant his taking the first step. She had opened herself up and let him know exactly what she was looking for, but he hadn't made his desires clear, and now he was here to do just that.

He lifted his head and looked down at the tumbled, bemused look in her eyes and smiled. "That still feels the same."

She nodded, slightly breathless as she whispered, "Absolutely, it feels amazing." She wrapped her arms around his neck, pulled him down, and kissed him, not with passion, but with a tenderness that almost brought tears to his eyes.

He hugged her and just held her close.

"I'm so sorry I hurt you," she whispered.

He placed a finger against her lips. " Shh , I know that," he replied, giving her another kiss. "I'm still not sure I understand exactly what happened, what triggered you to leave me without an explanation. Plus, I can't guarantee that I won't bring it up sometimes, like when I'm mad or finding something not going my way. I promise to desperately try not to because it's something that we need to get past as a couple and find that safe ground again," he murmured. "But I want to try to have a relationship with you again. I want to see if we still have what we had before."

"I hope not," she muttered, crumbling in his arms. When he frowned, she gave him a little smile. "I'm hoping we have something way better, something I'm a little more secure in, less worried about being the wrong person for you, and less worried about our future. As much as I want it to just be us in this relationship," she shared, shaking her head, "we live in a world that's crazy, with a lot of confusion out there. This new relationship will develop over time, but I would like it to be all that we had before, plus a level of confidence in ourselves and each other that brings a new level of peace and safety that I can only imagine at this point."

"I can get behind that," he murmured, as he slowly and tenderly rubbed his nose against hers. He thought about her words and everything that they meant.

"I need you to forgive me, and… I can't even ask for that," she whispered. "All I can do is hope that, over time, you will."

He nodded. "I will. I am. I have," he replied, with a shrug. "One thing I know for sure is that I don't ever want to lose you again." He lowered his head, and this time kissed her with a building passion. When he finally broke away, he was struggling for his breath. "Damn," he muttered.

She nodded. "It's been a long time." He froze and looked down at her, one eyebrow raised. She nodded. "Never anybody for me but you."

He closed his eyes, not even aware how much her answer meant to him until he heard her say it. In the back of his mind he'd still been worried about another man. Somebody better than him, somebody she wanted more, and yet, by her own admission, there hadn't been. He crushed her against him, and then, without even asking, he slid his hands underneath her nightie, over her smooth thighs, along her rounded hip to her belly.

She sucked in her breath, as his hand climbed higher and higher, until he cupped her right breast, and she shuddered against him.

He smiled. "That hasn't changed."

She shuddered again and cried out, making small mewling sounds, as he drew kisses across her neck, down her throat, up against her nightie, before he slipped it over her head and tossed it to the floor. She lay before him completely carefree and happy, her arms opened wide as she waited for him. He quickly shed his clothing, almost tripping as he forgot to first take off his shoes. She chuckled, and he glared at her, but no anger was in his gaze.

"You always used to do that too," she murmured. "You would get so excited that you forgot you still had shoes on."

"I shouldn't even be wearing the damn shoes in the house."

"I thought about reminding you of that, but I figured it wasn't my place."

"It absolutely is your place," he said, with a groan. "I bought this house because I couldn't stand the thought of not having that part of our dream," he murmured. "I can't believe that I finally get a chance to share it with you."

Tears in her eyes, she pulled him down, even as he was still kicking off his socks.

With laughter in his gaze, he happily turned to her, her arms wrapped around him as she kissed him with all the passion that appeared to be pent up inside her. He took the blast full on and felt his own body shuddering in response.

All he could do was hang on for the ride, as she rolled him over to his back and explored the body that she knew so well. Yet it seemed brand-new, a moment to reacquaint herself, as she explored Gideon's familiar body, but better somehow. He hated to see the tears in her eyes, and he wished he could take them away. However, he didn't want to stop whatever was happening between them right now.

She cried out in joy and in pain, for every new wound, every new scar that she didn't recognize or didn't know. He tried to explain, but she placed a finger against his lips, not giving him a chance. Then finally, when she found his erection, he cried out in pain and a joy of his own, as she fully explored the long, hard length of him.

She whispered, "At least this hasn't changed."

He gave a groan and whispered, "How could it possibly, except that it's been dying for you all this time?"

She hadn't asked him further about his prior inconsequential relationships he had already divulged, and that was good because he didn't even want to go there. He hadn't been as good as her, but then he'd had a broken heart to heal. Still, random warm bodies hadn't buried his pain, so he'd quickly stopped. Now as he pulled her into his arms, flipped her on the bed beneath him, and entered her with one final push, she stilled beneath him, slowly wiggling to accept the length, and he realized that she had meant every word of it. She hadn't been out there screwing around with other people, and, for that, he was forever grateful.

Moving slowly and tenderly, he gradually picked up the pace, until she was crying beneath him, screaming at him to bring this to an end. He reached between them and caressed her nub, knowing how sensitive she was there. He often didn't need to do anything other than that. She came apart in his arms, leaving him to drive once, twice, and a third time to his own completion, before collapsing beside her.

She wrapped her arms around him and just held him close. "I'd forgotten but not forgotten," she whispered. "Talk about a homecoming, after such a long time."

He smiled, pulled her tightly to his chest, and muttered, "At least now you're where you belong."