CHAPTER NINE

Despite their words, Mir stayed rooted to the spot as the platform emptied around them. Voices became muffled, and the carriages rocked on their springs as people made their way to their seats. It’d be so damn easy to just stand here and watch the train pull away as they’d done as a pup. Their head shot to the engine at the toot of the horn. That always happened before the train began moving.

“All aboard,” the beta conductor called, but no other passengers waited on the platform.

Mir bet they’d rather shout, “Get your lazy asses on the fucking train; we’ve got a timetable for a damn reason.”

“Ready?” Tavish asked as he reached for the door of the single second-class carriage. It was behind the first-class sleeper carriage but in front of the third class and the freight section that took up half of the train’s length. Mir had never imagined traveling in anything, but the third-class section, but Tavish was clearly a first, or second-class-only type.

“Hell, no, but let’s get on with it anyway. The sooner we go, the sooner we can come home.” The comment produced an alpha smile, and Mir congratulated themselves on making at least one of them a little more comfortable.

Mir’s anxiety shot up again as they made their way down the carriage’s narrow corridor. The individual compartments were on one side of the carriage, so passengers willing to pay the first-class premium didn’t have to suffer others walking past them at every stop.

Tavish held their cases, both brown leather and distinctly unsuitable for an omega, in one hand in front of him while holding the other hand behind himself for Mir to hold. It must have been awkward for him to walk like that, but there was no way Mir would let him go. It was too narrow for them to have any more contact. Mir still mashed themself against his back as much as possible considering their belly, eyes focused on his shirt and nose concentrating on his familiar scent.

Mir bet their fear was stinking up the whole carriage, and the stuck-up omega and her family would be laughing their damn heads off at the idiot who was scared stupid about a train. It made Mir even more self-conscious. After what seemed like an age of shuffling, Tavish stopped and opened a compartment door.

Two betas, an omega, and a pair of four or five-year-old twins left three seats unoccupied. The dark-haired children sat together at the window, almost jiggling with excitement. Tavish motioned for Mir to take the window seat opposite the pups, and, after stowing the cases in the racks above the plush, deep blue seating, sat next to them.

The seating arrangement meant Tavish’s body shielded Mir from anyone coming into the compartment, and it also meant the view out the window wasn’t obstructed.

Which is good. Maybe. Seeing where they was might dampen the throat constricting anxiety threatening to choke them. It could also make it worse as the impulse to remember every tree, field, and fencepost, as they’d done on the way to town, in case they ever had to get back to the farm alone, already itched.

The children’s noses wrinkled a little, and at first, Mir thought they were looking down on them, then they remembered that they did indeed stink quite a lot.

Mir grabbed frantically for Tavish’s hand as the carriage jerked into motion. “Oh cr…” Mir changed what they had been about to say to ‘crikey’ as the youngsters bounced in excitement.

The train sped up, and the greenery outside blended in a sickening blur. Mir turned themself as much as possible, pushing their face into Tavish’s shoulder, breathing in his safe scent, laced with their own, as the carriage jerked and clattered as it sped up. When the driver pulled the whistle, Mir nearly jumped out of the seat.

One of the twins giggled and whispered, “Scaredy omega,” to the other.

The omega poked the beta sitting opposite Tav. After a brief conversation with eyebrows, the beta finally seemed to understand the message the omega was trying to convey.

“I am so sorry,” the beta said. “Cul, don’t be rude. She can’t help it if she’s nervous. Is it her first time traveling by train?” The protocol of the whole situation was laughable. The omega felt unable to discipline the children in front of strangers, whether she was their Ma or an older sibling. The beta clearly didn’t feel able to talk to Mir when they stank of fear with a protective alpha hovering. What did the beta think Tavish would do? Beat the crap out of them if they said hi to Mir?

“I’m not sure,” Tavish replied before turning to Mir. “It’s an odd feeling, isn’t it?”

The rumbly movement was horribly familiar. Mir had never traveled by train as a kid, so the only possible memory must have come after being drugged and taken from the roadside pub.

“It’s better than the last time, at least I’m not…” Mir trailed off as Tavish squeezed their hand in warning. Mir understood the silent ‘shut up’ signal. Yeah, Mir was pretty embarrassing, with the big-ass beta clothes, short hair, and scarred wrists. Now Mir understood why Tavish had insisted they wear a hooded jacket this morning, even though it’d been pleasantly warm.

Or he’s just concerned about you. Don’t be a dumb shit all your life. Last night was necessary. Trusting a little won’t hurt.

Mir told the inner voice that trust damn well did hurt, and it had, time and time again.

The faces of the other adults registered disappointment that they weren’t going to get any juicy gossip. Mir pulled their hand out of Tav’s and moved away from him as much as possible in the confines of the seat, and he didn’t try to touch them again. Yep, I’m definitely embarrassing him. He’s doing this because of his sense of responsibility to a patient from his doctor days, just like he did what he did last night.

The fact that they could occasionally share a smile was a lucky bonus. Mir didn’t even know if what he’d said about wanting to claim Mir and the babies was true. He certainly hadn’t taken the opportunity to bond Mir last night. In the cold light of day, even though Tavish had been nothing but attentive and caring ever since, relief bloomed that he hadn’t bitten them. The rejection had been shitty, but it would be so much worse if Mir could feel his emotions.

Yet again, Mir could be blindly traveling toward a horrible future. Their thoughts swung to and fro, like a child’s swing, from this being another kidnapping, to Tav being totally truthful. But if this was a kidnapping, why had Tav waited so long to deliver them? Omega eyesight and hearing might be worse than any other type of person, but their sense of smell was brilliant. They’d never gotten a hint of deceit from Tav, but they’d trusted too readily before.

The fact remained that neither Mir nor the triplets could survive without help. Fuck, Mir wanted Tav to be what he appeared so damn much because this odd alpha was claiming more of Mir’s heart with every passing day.

Just let this be real. Just let him be telling the truth.

But he hasn’t bonded me.

Pa might have been a shit parent and a shit alpha, but he loved Ma enough to bond her. Knowing what Mir did now about Makish, Mir had to wonder if the bond had been consensual.

Tavish’s big, comforting, confident hand reached over and reclaimed Mir’s, and his thumb rubbed the pressure point on their wrist firmly and slowly. It was exactly what they needed, just like he’d made sure Mir enjoyed last night. Very few of the alphas in Hell had cared about the omega they were mounting, except for producing the mating reaction.

But Tavish had only been interested in getting Mir to cum last night so he could make them smell like a mated couple for his family. They still concentrated on his touch and the countryside rolling past, although it was mostly uninterrupted deciduous forest.

There was so much land on Malthusia that had yet to be cultivated, and this was only one small part of the world that, on the other side of the veil, teemed with the original, bi-gendered form of humanity. As much as Mir hated the vastly different life choices available according to how an individual malthusian manifested as an adult, this had to be better than the billions that were poisoning the very land and air that gave them life, according to the priests.

Here, there was plenty of space for Mir’s children and many generations of their descendants to live and grow without worrying about starving because the population had outgrown the food supply. Malthusians hadn’t even moved off this one island, so there was a whole planet out there for expansion if it was ever needed. Yes, Mir wondered what the exotic foods they’d heard about were like, such as coffee, bananas, and chocolate, but tasting something different wasn’t worth the future of their species or the planet. The world beyond the veil was polluted by the need for faster and cheaper travel, for more consumable, unsustainable goods. Some born-gendered people lived like kings. Others, many others, died from hunger and diseases caused by too many people living together.

Mir hadn’t thought about issues outside surviving the next few minutes, hours, or days for so very long. It was… an enlightening experience. A gap in the trees revealed a field where sheep grazed. Mir squinted at a particularly large sheep, only to realize it was a large white dog, a flock guardian. The Malthusian way was to deter predators by natural means rather than killing every threat to livestock. The wolves, bears, and lynx the Three-Faced God created had just as much of a right to live as Mir did. Even where Mir had grown up, in the far more populous south, there were wide stretches of wild land between settlements. Keeping people from striking out on their own meant population pressure naturally controlled the Malthusian population.

The field was soon far behind as the landscape returned to the natural forests. Maybe traveling in this little box, cut off from the land they clattered across, enabled people to think outside of their own immediate concerns for a time. It was certainly letting Mir explore things they’d never thought about, things inspired by Tavish’s books and the little Mir had gleaned from their well-educated Ma.

Theoretically, Malthusia should be a sustainable, low-technology paradise, but Mir had seen plenty of scientific equipment in the basement of Hell, items that they’d never imagined would be sanctioned by the ruling council. How things were brought over was a secret ordinary people weren’t told, so Malthusians stayed safe from temptation.

Allowed technology included medical equipment and sustainable solar and wind power, but they rejected automobiles, airplanes, and telecommunications. Horse-powered transport, a limited train network, and a postal service provided all their transport and communication needs.

But all the Malthusian principles hadn’t stopped the Owner from obtaining the tracking device Mir cut out of their flesh with a shard of glass during that nightmare run through the forest. It hadn’t stopped that fucker in a white coat from playing God and changing the fate the Almighty had decreed for Mir. They braced for the usual flare of anger, but in the quiet, gently swaying carriage, Mir found the fury at losing their longed-for alpha future had somehow waned and died without them noticing. Given a choice between instantly becoming an alpha or birthing these triplets, Mir would choose the babies. A physical shiver went up their spine at the thought of where the triplets would be right now if Kev hadn’t helped Mir escape. And if Tavish hadn’t found them. Mir owed him everything, and getting pissed last night over him doing something that clearly made him uncomfortable, to help me, now felt so fucking petty and stupid.

Tavish squeezed Mir’s hand, and they turned away from the window, although their thoughts had been focused on things far beyond the rolling hills of trees.

Tavish mouthed, “Alright?”

Mir nodded and gave him a smile. The rest of the carriage’s occupants were either napping or reading in the case of the betas. Tavish had a book open on his lap, just like the betas.

Mir had never seen any alpha read anything but a newspaper or bills, and that had only been Makish. The alphas in Hell didn’t read; they always had more important things on their minds when they were with Mir, such as making knots.

Seeing how far they’d had to travel to start seeing more populated areas made Mir consider just how secret what went on in Hell had to be. It couldn’t only be about keeping omegas in constant heat. Yes, that was illegal according to Tavish, but the ruling council would probably only give the Owner a slap on the wrist if they found out. No, there was something else going on; they’d heard the words ‘project’ and ‘experiment’ several times. Mir, and their babies, were part of it.

The Owner must have connections high up in society to have obtained that technology, but what Mir couldn’t work out was why. There were plenty of low-class natural omegas he could have purchased to stock his establishment. Like puzzle pieces, several things clicked together. During the final few months, when Mir had been sent to every alpha, and those alphas had been told to be as rough as they liked, they’d heard the guard betas saying that the owner wanted to know how much it would take for a ‘special’ to slip a pregnancy.

It was all an experiment. Suffering for science like a lab animal. An experiment not sanctioned by the ruling council because they couldn’t possibly approve something in direct opposition to the church, could they?

Mir’s head ached with all these complex, new thoughts. For years, the only thing they’d been able to process was how to give a little pain back to the betas and alphas and steal food from the drugged-up or hopeless omegas. They bet Tavish would understand it all. Mir glanced over. Tavish’s shirt sleeve had ridden up just a little, revealing a pink, not red, band of skin around his wrist. With alpha recovery time, it’d hopefully be almost healed by the time they reached their destination; otherwise, there could be some damn awkward questions.

Tavish turned the page of his textbook, then, as if he could feel Mir’s gaze, he looked up, and the skin bedside his eyes crinkled in concern.

Mir gave him a smile before he could ask, “Alright?” again. With an answering smile, he returned to his book. Judging by the diagram they glimpsed, it was another book about pregnancy. Or maybe it was the same one Tavish was always reading. Mir had flicked through it once. All the long words and diagrams and even pictures of the insides of omegas, just like Mir, made them put it down immediately.

Tavish enjoyed his isolated life, and the triplets would be safe on Freedom Farm. If Mir told him about the other omegas in Hell, he’d never be able to leave it alone. What would happen to Kev, Mar, and the un-named baby if the authorities knew they were the result of an unregulated experiment? Even if it was a sanctioned experiment, they wouldn’t want Mir or Tav shouting about it.

Their swirling musings were halted by one of the twins waking up and whining “Are we nearly there yet?” The other youngster woke at their sibling’s fussing and stated, with an epic pout, that they was bored with all the trees out the window.

Mir caught the dark-haired child’s eye and stuck their tongue out. The wide-eyed shock on the pup’s chubby face had Mir stifling a chuckle. The mischievous grin that replaced the wide-eyed shock when Mir crossed their eyes had Mir biting their lip. The exchange continued for a while, with the other twin joining in before their Ma noticed the pair pulling faces at a fellow passenger.

After a glance at the beta, who clearly hadn’t seen a thing, the omega, yanked on the nearest twin’s arm. “Stop that right now.” Face red, she kept her gaze on the floor. “I am so sorry, they aren’t usually like this.”

“Don’t blame them, I started it,” Mir replied. “Exercising your facial muscles improves the appearance of the skin and stops it sagging as you get older. Isn’t that right, Doctor?” Mir gave Tavish the most innocent expression they could manage.

After rolling his eyes slightly, Tavish replied. “Yes, it is. You wouldn’t believe it by looking at her, but Mirelle is forty-five. She’s been doing these exercises for the past twenty years. Go on, Mirelle, show the nice omega your facial exercises.”

If looks could kill, Tavish would have been a shriveled husk on the floor, but as he’d turned the tables on them so neatly, Mir had no choice other than leading the omega and the twins in a series of grimaces that made their face ache.

The conductor saved Mir from further facial gymnastics as he called out the next station as he had been doing throughout the journey. Luckily for Mir’s aching face, it happened to be the family’s stop. Just as they were about to leave the carriage, the omega turned back to Tavish.

“You really should market that facial exercise idea. I can’t believe your omega is over forty.”

“Actually, I invented the exercises,” Mir piped up. “This poor old soul can’t get it up anymore, so I had to find a substitute for sucking his cock to stop my cheeks from sagging. Have a wonderful day.” Mir smiled sweetly as the omega’s jaw dropped almost to her knees, then snapped shut before she almost bolted out the compartment door, ushering the children in front of her.

Mir winced as silence blanketed the compartment. Doors slammed, and people called out before the conductor blew his whistle, and the train lurched back into motion.

“Too much?” Mir asked, squinting up at Tavish’s face.

His lips twitched, and then he lost his precarious hold on his emotions and started chuckling. It quickly turned into an all-out belly laugh as he fell sideways onto the seat and pulled Mir down with him. Five minutes later, they were still trying not to look each other in the eye in case it set them off again.

“I will never, and I mean never, ever forget the expression on that omega’s face. I thought I was going to have to give her mouth-to-mouth. Although if this is your way of dealing with being frightened of trains, I think I’m going to have to pay for a whole compartment if we don’t want you arrested for causing a breach of the peace. Time for something to eat, don’t you think?”

Despite mouthing off to the passengers in the compartment, the thought of eating in public sent butterflies whirling. Tavish had ignored Mir’s terrible table manners. Mir remembered growling like a starving dog during the first few days at Freedom Farm. Yes, Mir now used cutlery, as they had as a pup, although that was as far as it went. The manners expected of most omegas were totally foreign to them.

“Can we, erm, eat here?”

“You have as much right to eat in the first-class buffet car as anyone else with the appropriate ticket. Besides, they don’t like people eating in the second-class carriages, more cleaning.”

“Maybe I shouldn’t be up here then.” Mir waved a hand down their body. “I’m not exactly second-class material, am I?”

Tavish stood up. “Come on, up you get. I’m not taking no for an answer. Remember, you’re not just eating for you now.” With a scowl, Mir got up. “And smile, Freckles. This is fun.” Mir gave him the finger, which produced a grin. “Don’t shock the steward. I want lunch in my belly, not poured in my lap.”

Mir parroted his words behind his back but shut up when they moved out into the corridor. The train didn’t rock a huge amount, although it was enough for Mir to put a hand on the wooden rail to ensure their balance.

The buffet carriage was the next one down from the second-class section, and Mir could see the carriage door lurching and moving ahead of them. “Now, I’ll go first and hand you over the gap, it’s not a big one, so don’t worry.”

Tavish seriously thinks something like this will phase me?It was more than a little insulting. “I can stand on a galloping horse, Professor. I don’t think stepping over a four-inch gap is going to bother me. Maybe I should go first and help you.” Mir put their hand on Tav’s shoulder and gave him full-on sympathy face. “Is this on your list?”

“One hundred percent,” Tav deadpanned. For a moment, Mir actually believed he had a phobia of moving trains. Had Tav fallen as a child? All this time, Mir had been worrying about themselves and hadn’t even noticed Tav suffering.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to make fun of—”

Tav interrupted. “I’d go for you leading me over if you could get that enormous belly past me.” For a moment, Mir thought they’d misheard, as Tav had always taken great care to be unerringly polite.

Mir scowled. “Hook, line, and sinker, you sneaky fucker. You need to stop hanging around me. I’m a bad influence.”

“Never,” Tavish said and opened the door. The clanging and rumbling of the carriages got louder and combined with a breeze that ruffled Mir’s now ear-length hair.

The alpha glanced down at the tracks flashing past the gap between the carriages, then almost jumped across the gap. Mir stepped after him with far less fuss, noting that Tavish joking about this might well conceal a genuine fear.

A white-jacketed beta steward saw them entering the carriage and headed toward them, a smile on their face.

“Keep quiet,” Tavish said out of the side of his mouth. “I’m working on my alpha-ishness here.”

“Good afternoon, sir, madam,” the beta said to Tavish with a professional smile. “Table for two?”

“Yes, please,” Mir piped up before Tavish had a chance to answer.

The beta’s eyes widened at being spoken to by an omega, but their smile only faltered for a second. “Please, come this way.”

Mir’s satisfaction at knocking both Tavish and the steward out of their comfort zone faded as they made their way up the gangway. Tables for four were on one side with those for two on the other. The seats were identical to those in the passenger carriage, high-backed to give an illusion of privacy between diners, although the dark blue fabric was leather here, not velvet. Rather than the seats, it was the pristine, snow-white tablecloths and silverware on the tables that took Mir’s focus. The train shuddered a little, and with horror, Mir saw the thin-stemmed crystal glasses wobble a little. This was going to be an utter disaster.

A hand on their back jerked Mir’s attention back to Tavish and the still-smiling steward. “Everything alright, madam?”

“Yeah, yeah, I’m good,” Mir managed, and with everyone watching, including the four betas using the table opposite, they sat down. At least the seat was far enough from the table to accommodate Mir’s belly. With relief, Mir realized that the table had a lip on it so that stuff couldn’t slide off, but that didn’t mean Mir wouldn’t slop something on the tablecloth.

“List?” Tavish asked, and Mir wrinkled their nose. Yeah, this wasn’t comfortable.

“Of course,” the steward said and offered Mir a menu, but Tavish spoke up. “Burger and fries, with apple juice, for two, please.”

Without looking at Mir, the steward nodded and smiled. “Very good, sir.”

As soon as the steward left, Mir leaned forward as much as possible. “Was I that obvious?”

Tavish huffed out a low chuckle. “You were staring at the silverware like they were snakes. Don’t worry. Passengers spill stuff all the time. The tablecloths get replaced with every serving.”

“Thank fuck for that. I was scared stiff that the waiter would have a meltdown if I spilled something.”

One of the betas opposite them coughed into his napkin, although it sounded like they was covering a laugh. Tav’s eyebrows drew down in a frown.

“Sorry,” Mir apologized, not meeting his gaze.

Tavish’s lips thinned, but he stayed silent while the steward delivered their meals. Mir’s was substantially smaller than Tav’s, although beautifully presented with tomato and lettuce peeking out from under the beef patty. Without comment or hesitation, Tav exchanged their plates, and the last tiny piece of resentment from last night evaporated. Everything Tav did seemed geared to ensure Mir’s health and safety. They couldn’t fault him for that.

“You have nothing to apologize for. I just need to remember that I left all this society baggage behind for a reason. I want you to be comfortable, even if I’ve got a nagging, annoying, damn stupid voice in the back of my mind that sounds horribly similar to my stepma, moaning about etiquette. That is my problem, not yours, and I’ll deal with it.”

Tav had been poking fun on the way to the dining car, and it was time to get some payback. Mir reached their hand across the table, and Tavish held it. “No, it’s not,” Mir said. “You help with my issues, which are in no way your fault, and I’ll help you get over your cruelly repressive upbringing.” Mir grinned, then beckoned Tavish nearer. Tavish had to stand to lean close enough for Mir to whisper in his ear. “Right now, if we were alone, I’d climb across this table and give you the biggest kiss of your life, or maybe I’d slide underneath and suck that great big cock of yours down the back of my throat.”

A strangled noise pushed its way out of Tavish’s mouth, as he remained standing. “Can you please stop talking dirty? It’s going to be damn tricky concealing an erection in this kilt.”

“I love it when you beg. And I’m finally finding some advantages to being an omega. I’m hard as a nail and no one can tell.”

“I’m going to make you pay for that later.”

“Looking forward to it.”

Mir waited until Tavish’s butt returned to his seat. Then they winked. “I’m counting on it, and you have a fry stuck to your shirt.”

Mir laughed as Tavish glanced down, only to find his shirt pristine. The combined frown and grin was adorable. “You’re getting too big for your boots.”

Mir rubbed their knee against his under the table. “You’d better buy me some bigger boots then.”

He growled out, “Eat. Before it gets cold.”

Mir turned to their meal, glad to have both lightened the mood and proved to Tavish that they could do this. His constant, obvious worry added guilt to their own mental burden.

The burgers and fries were tasty and filling, but Tavish frowned when Mir didn’t finish all their meal. “Anything wrong?”

Mir straightened, bowing their back, trying to provide more room for their internal organs. “I’m good, but things are getting a bit squeezed in there.”

“Time to go back to our seats so you can stretch out a bit and put your feet up. I want to see if your ankles are getting puffy.”

Mir stood up. “You say the most romantic things.”

This time, the betas on the opposite table didn’t hide their smiles. Mir took the lead out of the compartment. Without comment, they held their hand behind them, which Tavish took without saying a word.

To Mir’s joy, no one had invaded their compartment. With a little encouragement, Mir found their socked feet in Tavish’s lap, with him massaging the soles as Mir reclined lengthways on the seat to give the triplets as much room as possible.

The rocking, clicky-clacking carriage and Tav’s touch acted as soporifics, and soon Mir’s eyelids drooped.

Mir tugged on their wrists. They didn’t remember how they’d gotten here, but one sniff of acrid disinfectant shot adrenaline into their system. They were in the sick bay underneath the rest of the complex.

“Mir? Cor, she’s awake.”

“Thank God for that.” The familiar voice echoed from the far side of the room. The white tiled walls and floor in here let sound bounce around, intensifying every noise, every scream.

Heart in their mouth, Mir turned their head, hoping against hope that this was yet another hallucination caused by the daily drug cocktail. The two other medical couches were always empty whenever they was in here.

Tor and Cor lay tied to the couches, naked and bound by their wrists and ankles, like Mir. They didn’t seem any older than the last time Mir saw them. They’re pups, just pups. Thankfully, Mir couldn’t see any bruises on the one twin, Tor, that they could see clearly from their prone position.

“Did…” Mir swallowed, wondering if they wanted to know the answer because there wasn’t a damn thing they could do right now, whatever the case. They couldn’t protect them or offer a single reassurance that things would be ok. “Did they hurt you?”

“Hurt us?” Tor frowned. Mir’s little sib was as tanned as they remembered and exuded health. Just the sort of tender morsel the fuckers here would love to destroy.

“They turned up at the farm when Pa was at the pub, said they’d found you, and you needed blood from us or you’d die,” Cor said. Their bed creaked. Mir caught a glimpse of Cor’s sandy hair as they tried to see over their twin.

“We’re just waiting for the doctor to come back so they can complete the checks. It’s the one from home, remember them? They are really nice, but they said they had a new colleague they wanted to fetch. These safety straps are a bit much though.” Tor said, frowning at the brown leather encircling their wrists. We aren’t unconscious like you were. We won’t fall off the beds.”

The trusting little idiots.Sickness rolled in Mir’s belly. This is my fault. Only a few days ago, one of the alphas said they wished Hell had more omegas like Four because he’d been fed up with waiting for an appointment.

“Didn’t you think it was odd that they took your clothes?” Mir pulled in a breath; they didn’t have time for this. Even if the twins had fought, if the Owner had sent a team after them, like he had Mir, they wouldn’t have stood a chance. “We have to get out of here. Get free as fast as you can.”

“The doctor said we have to wait here,” Tor started. “If we don’t, it’d be awful for you. What’s wrong with you anyway?”

“There is nothing wrong with me. These people aren’t what they—”

Two sets of footsteps strode down the corridor outside. Fear syringed into Mir’s body, and they yanked on the straps even harder. More appeared, snaking around Mir’s upper arms, thighs, and chest like serpents attempting to squeeze the life out of them. “Get free. Get free and run, don’t worry about—”

The door next to Mir opened, and the middle-aged beta who had started all this, who had taken Mir’s babies, turned away from the person behind them who was still hidden from Mir’s gaze by the door.

“Here they are. This is an interesting test. You’ll get to see the process up close. We’ll inject one with the normal dose and the other with double the amount. I’ve been waiting for a pair of identical twins to try this out on for—”

Mir roared. “Get away from them. So help me, if you touch a hair on their heads, I’ll—”

“You’ll do what, Mirelle?” Tavish stood in the doorway, wearing a white coat. A stethoscope hung around his neck. He smiled. “I don’t think there’s anything a weak, stupid omega like you can do except beg. Come on, Mir, make a choice. Beg for your siblings or your babies. You can’t expect us to give up both.”

Mir looked down, and their muscular, tight belly had morphed into a swollen, pregnant one.

Mir put every ounce of threat into their voice and glare. “Leave. Us. Alone. Or I will end you.”

Tavish smiled, an easy, relaxed expression as he pulled a small drug vial and a syringe from the pocket of his white coat.

“Not choosing means you all get to stay. Now, which of you delicious pups gets which dose? Mirelle got a normal one, which I’ve heard produces an excruciatingly painful fast manifestation. I’d imagine a double dose will, at the very least, be even more painful, and it could even prove fatal. It’s part of the reason these tests are so essential. Establishing a lethal dose is always part of drug trials. And with two of you already in the program, we don’t really need a third. So, who are you going to sacrifice? Of course, I could give one double and one triple to test the speed of their demise. Tor or Cor? Tor, Cor, Tor, Cor, Tor, Cor.” The names repeated, clacking away endlessly While Mir threw themselves against the leather straps that now covered every part of their body, smothering them and stealing their eyesight.

The radio on the counter on the other side of the room dinged.

“The next station will be Beddington. That’s Beddington, thank you.” The tinny beta voice cut off.

Mir catapulted awake, trying to separate the nightmare from reality. Beddington was the next town up the track from Hartcote, where they’d grown up. This meant that about half an hour after they left Beddington, they’d pass the Reeve Farm. A quick glance showed Tav had also dropped off to sleep. His book lay open, propped up on Mir’s feet. Which was damn fortunate as Mir’s heart still raced. The remnants of the dream lingered. Tavish had been so damn cold, so believable, that if he tried to touch Mir right now, which he would if he was awake, Mir knew they’d probably either freeze, run, or duck and cover.

Dream, just a dream. Think of something else, something calm that doesn’t involve him. A scene Mir had clung onto many times in Hell came back.

When Mir was young, before the twins arrived, Ma took them down to the bottom pasture when the train was due in the summer evenings, before bath and bedtime. They made up stories about where the well-dressed, posh people on the trains were going and what their lives were like. Mir continued the tradition with the twins, not because Mir wanted to be one of those ‘silver-spoons’ but because doing it made them feel closer to Ma. Mir imagined her, wherever she was, looking at the clock and wondering if her pups were watching for the train.

Then they’d manifested and got rejected by the family they had stupidly thought loved them. As Mir had been traveling north when the blond alpha caught them, they must have already passed the place where Mir had been bundled onto the train. Did the staff never question the fact that one of the passengers seemed to be drugged, beaten, and half-dressed? Had that smiling steward served the blond alpha and his betas while Mir lay tied up and drugged elsewhere on the train?

Proto-alpha Mir had never wanted to travel by train; the farm and being a big fish in the small pool of Hartcote had been the extent of their ambition. During all those times of watching the train rumble past, they’d never imagined either being cargo or a first-class passenger. This could even be that very train, just traveling in the opposite direction. Mir had come full circle, but the person on the train today was a very different one to the proud, certain, and oh-so-naive proto-alpha pup who had watched and dreamed.

“Mir? What’s wrong?” Tavish asked sleepily. Not for the first time, Mir hated his enhanced alpha senses that seemed to be able to pick up every nuance of their emotions with one sniff. Lying was pointless. Tavish knew there was something wrong and would be like a dog with a bone if not provided with a believable explanation now. He’d nod, accept whatever Mir said, but if he didn’t believe it, he’d bring it up later, probably when Mir was at an even lower ebb and half asleep.

“I grew up in the next town. I’d rather not meet anyone I recognize.”

Tavish turned in his seat to look Mir in the eye and appeared completely unfazed by the revelation. “There is no need to be ashamed of yourself. None of what happened to you was your fault…” he started the speech Mir had heard numerous times before.

But it was time for him to listen for a change. “No, it was my father’s fault, and either he, or the alpha who arranged to buy me, sight unseen, is probably still my legal guardian.” Whether it was because they was now several hundred miles from Hell rather than the thirty or forty miles Mir had managed to cover, and that made Mir braver, they didn’t know. Rather than keeping to themself and laughing with Tavish, it suddenly felt vital that someone knew.

“Look, Clayen said they could fix it, and I—”

“I’m not going back there. I’d rather die and take these three with me.” Mir stared Tavish right in the eye, willing him to believe their words. “I thought you were one of them coming to get me when you stopped the wagon. I couldn’t believe I’d been so damn stupid and dropped the glass shard I used to cut out the tracker. If I’d still had it, I would have slit my throat without hesitation when you called out not to be frightened because you were a doctor.”

Tavish’s brow creased. “Please, don’t say things like that.”

“Why? It’s true.” Mir lifted their chin. “They took my babies at birth. I never even got to see them let alone hold them. But I heard them crying loud and healthy, or they were then. What the bastards did to the poor little babies, I can’t…” Mir broke off and stood up, feeling the need to run, to fight, to do anything rather than just sit on their now well-padded backside and wait for it all to start again.

“Mir.” Tavish’s voice was strong, deep, and loaded with alpha dominance. “No one is taking you away from me, especially not your father or the bastard that had you.”

Mir rounded on him. “You and whose army is going to go up against the legal system? They’ll send me back. You’ll get locked up and…” Mir’s hands went protectively around their belly as they looked up at him, hoping with all their heart that they was wrong. “As much as I’m an alpha up here—” Mir poked their forehead “—there’s no way I can deny that I’m an omega in the eyes of the law. And that law says I must have a legal guardian. One of those fuckers is my guardian, Tavish, and they have every legal right to do whatever the fuck they want with me.”

Mir expected righteous alpha anger or defeat and despair, maybe even another expression of confidence at his beta sibling’s abilities to provide the miraculous paperwork that would stop the nightmare. What Mir never expected was Tav’s face paling and the alpha avoiding their eyes.

Mir had seen enough guilt and shame to recognize it, but they’d never seen it on an alpha’s face before.