9. Trust Exercises
It wasthe third heavy winter storm of the season, and Zev was hotter than a furnace.
The room he shared with Dragan had transformed in the autumn, looking more like a cave of furs and quilted blankets than a proper bedroom, and the fire in the hearth blazed thanks to a clever little device Dragan had installed to keep out sleet and snow. The wolves had been there a moment before, curled up by the fire, but then Narcise had growled at Dragan when Zev started whining and writhing on the bed, and they were banished to their equally cozy den in the living room.
"I think you have another in you, pup." Zev groaned as Dragan pushed against the spot inside that made pressure build deep down. He had three fingers in Zev already, and Zev had to grab the bedpost to stop from fucking himself on them like he had when Dragan teased his first release what felt like years ago.
He'd been working Zev up to a peak and easing him down all evening, and Zev wondered if he would find a better measure of relief if he just flung himself into the snow. He'd probably melt it. He'd probably warm all of Lukos, especially after Dragan had put him on a leashand murmured about how loose and desperate he was until Zev came at the ghost of a touch on his cock.
"Thought you loved me," he said, and Dragan laughed fondly.
"You know you want more."
"Yes, but can't you fuck me?"
"Mm, no, we said this was about patience, my wolf."
Zev was not exactly feeling patient. He wanted to growl as Dragan drew his fingers just so slightly back, but the rumble in his throat died when he felt a fourth finger brush his rim.
"Can you take it?"
Not will you, Zev noticed. If it was a matter of Zev bearing through something for Dragan's sake, that would be another matter, which was why Dragan asked questions like that, keeping him honest.
"Yes. I can. I want to."
"You want my hand? You want to be stretched open for me, do you?"
Zev nodded, but Dragan remained still, patient in a way Zev couldn't imagine just now. "Yes. If you keep teasing me, I can just...just get my fur, sleep in the snow."
Dragan made a disbelieving sound. The first snowfall had been so much higher and heavier than anything that usually made its way to the compound, and Zev had shifted into a wolf, leapt into the snow, and disappeared to his ears. Dragan had laughed so hard he'd wept, and it didn't get any better when Zev had to bounce in order to make his way back to the front door.
"Go ahead, then," Dragan said, and Zev groaned, trying to grind down on his fingers. He wanted Dragan in him now, never mind that they'd never managed to make it all the way yet, with Dragan's hand inside him. Just the thought made Zev shiver, and Dragan stroked his cock with his free hand, making Zev moan and arch his back.
"I'd say you're more of a cat than a wolf, right now." Zev hissed, and he could hear the smile in Dragan's voice as he said, "I'll make you howl first, kitten."
"You can't say things like that when you're inside me—ah." Zev felt the slick touch of oil, warmed, no doubt, by the heat radiating from Zev's face alone, and Dragan eased the fourth finger inside.
"Settle," Dragan said, and his dominance fell over Zev like a blast of heat from the fire. He wasn't under yet, but he could feel the edges of it at his awareness, the slow, hazy feeling that made him feel like he was floating. He let go of the bedpost, easing the tension in his arms, and tipped his head back on the fur blanket.
"Settle," Dragan said again, and Zev closed his eyes, feeling the slight chill that always threatened to creep in through the walls, the warmth of his own skin, the soft, treated furs beneath him. The storm raged outside like an army of beasts charging through the hills, but Zev was safe with Dragan.
He let out a long, slow breath, and his voice came out a whisper, feather-soft.
"Please."
* * *
His wolf was beautiful.
Dragan thought that all the time, really. Zev, shirtless in the summer, hair tied back as he worked on houses in the sun. Zev swimming sleek and naked in the hot spring, steam rising and turning his fair cheeks red. Zev on his back in the grass, Dragan above him with Zev's legs over his shoulders. Zev hunting, full of concentration, eyes locked on his prey and fingers steady on his bow. Zev as a wolf, bounding through meadows in the spring, mud on his paws and in his fur, tongue lolling as he laughed in the way of wolves and tried to put his paws on Dragan's shoulders.
He was beautiful even on those nights he awoke with a start, eyes shadowed, reaching blindly for his fur that was never far away, when he would stop and stare off into the distance, toward the compound, a pensive look on his face. Dragan knew he was thinking about Evgen, wondering what had happened to him, if his foster-father was a pile of bones like the ones drawn in the sacred cave near the springs, the old renditions of Those Who Left before they had known the truth of what happened to them.
But he was never as beautiful as he was now, when he settled for Dragan, submitted to Dragan's dominance and showed his throat. He was covered in a light sheen of sweat, panting, all his lean muscles tensed as he took Dragan's hand.
It was easy enough for Dragan to curl his fingers and find the place that made Zev moan and twitch, made his cock grow harder where it lay flushed and already wet against his firm stomach. He made the most wonderful noises, whimpers and gasps, and four fingers deep, he was so close to coming, Dragan didn't doubt he could simply keep rubbing Zev's prostate and watch him come all over himself.
"Tell me how it feels, my wolf," Dragan murmured, gently sliding them in and out, so close to being able to fold his thumb and fist him properly…but this couldn't be rushed. As badly as Dragan wanted to see it, he wanted his mate to be howling in pleasure, eager for it, open and accepting and not in pain that wouldn't soon become pleasure. Discomfort was understandable. Pain, with this, was not something Dragan would allow.
"Full," Zev managed, after a moment, making that whimpering sound again. "When you do that, I—I think I could…." He shook on the bed and gasped as Dragan rubbed at that spot inside of him.
"Yes, of course you could," Dragan said, smiling down at his mate. "But you won't, until you ask me."
"Please, may I," Zev said, immediately, voice very close to a whine.
"No, but that was pretty, my mate." Dragan laughed outright at the scowl that earned him. He was glad of it, because Zev had been so careful not to express anger or annoyance at Dragan when they were first mated. He'd been so convinced that Dragan wouldn't allow it, as if feelings were things he needed permission to have. Dragan knew that his dominance could sometimes be heavy-handed thanks to the years he'd spent as kuvar, not to mention living without a mate and with only a strong-willed, dominant daughter through countless winters.
It had almost been a shock, the first time Zev was cross with him, but Dragan had been glad to see it if only because it meant Zev was becoming more comfortable in his life here. Despite all of the dramatics surrounding their courtship, they were still getting used to each other.
It made him smile now, and he gave Zev's cock a quick pat and laughed as he squirmed under the touch, twitching. "Relax, puppy. Take what I'm giving you. You like it, hmm?"
"Yes," Zev managed, breathing going shallow again, as Dragan fucked him gently with four fingers, slow and easy, hand slick with the oil. "I, ah. Like it, feels good. Can I have more–"
"Hmm." Dragan stroked Zev's thigh with his free hand, feeling the warmth around his fingers. "Breathe, first. Deeply. There you are." Zev had a tendency to hold his breath when he was close to coming, either to hold it off because he didn't have permission, because it felt better, or because he was too caught up to remember to do it.
Dragan liked to think it was all three.
Zev breathed in and out, and Dragan was quiet, watching him as he continued to pet his thigh, his side. The touch was almost as settling as his dominance, and when Zev was finally relaxed enough, Dragan slid his hand free and took up the oil to add more.
"If this hurts, you will tell me," Dragan said firmly, nudging Zev's thighs apart a little more, spreading him open.
"Yes, Dragan," Zev said.
"If you do not want it, you will tell me," Dragan continued, returning to his task, easily slipping in three fingers with Zev so open and slick for him.
"Yes, Dragan." A hint of impatience, and Dragan glanced at him, arching an eyebrow.
"I said yes," Zev muttered, and Dragan bared his teeth in a fierce grin, leaned down, and bit the corded muscles of Zev's lower stomach, close enough to his cock that Zev gasped loudly and bucked up hard off the bed.
"Behave, puppy, or I'll see you tied up and leashed and hard as a rock until morning," Dragan said, but it was an empty threat, and they both knew it. Zev was too beautiful, too desperate, for Dragan to want to do anything but watch him fall apart in pleasure.
"Please, I want to. I'll tell you if I can't take it, but I want to try."
That was pretty, and it was exactly what Dragan wanted to hear. "All right. Good boy. Breathe, that's it." He coaxed Zev into relaxing once more, gave him four fingers for a few long, breathless seconds, and then carefully folded his thumb in against his palm.
It took some time to work his hand in, and once, he did stop when Zev went still, staring up at the ceiling—but his breathing was still deep and even, and he wasn't tensing his muscles like before. His cock was still hard, and Dragan stroked it gently with his other hand as he pressed forward.
"That's it, yes, you're taking my hand like you were made for it," Dragan praised, and his voice went rough, his own cock hardening at the sight. They'd spent long nights together this winter, practicing, stretching him, making Zev ready for this. "Look, my wolf," he said, after a moment, when he found the ability to speak again. "Look at my hand inside you."
Zev blinked, then glanced down. He pushed up a bit to see, which made him clench tighter around Dragan's hand, buried now to the wrist. His eyes went wide—and then he smiled, his eyes bright when they met Dragan's. "Ah."
"Yes," Dragan chuckled. "I have fisted the words out of you, hmm?"
"Not quite yet," Zev said. "It doesn't hurt," he assured Dragan, and relaxed back on the bed. It was clear that the pride he felt in taking Dragan's hand was just as intense as the sensation, and Dragan couldn't deny that he felt the same. Seeing his hand completely enveloped by Zev's body was enthralling. He felt the same pride as Zev, knowing how much Zev trusted him to allow this, how patient he'd been, how he'd been so open and honest with Dragan about stopping when they needed to.
"This is how it should be, between mates," Dragan murmured, curling his fingers inside and rubbing again at Zev's prostate. "I trust you to tell me when it hurts, and you trust me to stop when it does."
"Dragan," Zev panted, fingers curling into the bedding. "Dragan–"
"You are close, aren't you? I can tell. Your cock is so hard, look at it, dripping onto your stomach. I want you to come on my hand, my good wolf, you earned it." Dragan curled his fingers again, and moved his hand with a little more purpose. He was still careful with it, but Zev was completely lost to the sensations, pushing forward as if he were trying to take Dragan's whole hand even deeper than it already was.
Dragan could feel it a second before it happened; the heat around his hand became vise-tight and Zev's cock went even stiffer before he came all over his stomach. He was loud, and the pressure on Dragan's hand was very nearly painful as Zev tensed all over in the throes of his release.
Dragan murmured to him, but he doubted that Zev even heard him as he carefully withdrew his hand and found a wet cloth near the bed to clean himself off. He left Zev lying there, messy and breathing fast, covered in sweat and come, with a blissful smile on his face.
He thought about filling the tub and carrying his mate to the bath, but Dragan liked the thought of him sleeping like this, marked and so completely his. Zev was under, sprawled on the bed in a boneless heap of satisfied, pleased, proud submissive. He blinked hazy, blurry eyes up at Dragan when he returned to the bed with a mug of water, having finished cleaning up. He sat on the edge of the bed and held the water to Zev's lips, and Zev drank thirstily, not seeming to mind the water that dripped down onto his chest.
"My wolf, did you like that?"
Zev nodded and turned toward Dragan, seeking contact. Dragan made him finish the water, then put the mug on the bedside table and gathered his trembling mate into his arms. "You're shaking."
"Mmm." Zev pressed up against him, and Dragan wrapped him tight in his arms, as Zev clung to him in a way he only ever needed after their play turned particularly intense. "It was so good, Dragan. Thank you."
"You're welcome, but you did the work, eh?" Dragan shifted so he was on his back, and Zev climbed on top of him, warm as any pile of furs, a tangle of pointy elbows and knees and sweat-damp hair.
"You did, too," Zev whispered, loyally, and Dragan could feel him smile against his neck before pressing a kiss there. "Do you want to fuck me?"
Dragan ran a hand down Zev's back, tangling his fingers in Zev's long hair. "Always, my wolf. But in the morning, I think. You can wake me up with your mouth on my cock, then ride me, hmm?"
Zev nodded, hair soft against Dragan's naked chest. "Yes." He lifted his head and smiled at Dragan, though he was under enough that he couldn't quite meet Dragan's eyes. That was all right—Dragan's dominance was sated, but it appreciated the deference all the same. "I love you."
"I love you, too. This winter, I will keep you warm and happy." He tipped Zev's face up to kiss him. "Filled up, with my cock, my tongue, my fingers, my fist, whatever you need."
"You," Zev said, and settled down again, head tucked under Dragan's chin, cheek resting on Dragan's chest as if he wanted to hear his heartbeat. "I need you."
Warmth and contentment settled over him, and Dragan stroked Zev's back as he slowly fell asleep. He was still roused, and he supposed he could take himself in hand and ease the ache in his cock thinking about what happened…but, no. He would wait for the morning, when Zev would be full of energy and eager to pleasure him, to ride his cock with his hair messy and tangled around his face.
Outside, the snow continued to fall over Lukos, but inside, the home he'd made with his mate was warm and safe, and his wolf was smiling in his sleep.