14. Chapter 14

Chapter 14

Locke

I was in love with Adam. I could no longer fool myself into thinking any differently. He was sexy, adorable, sweet, funny, and thoughtful. The way he didn't balk about helping me with the harness and how he sucked me with and without it, had been a perfect moment. I always enjoyed wearing a harness and artificial cock, but the process of putting it on sometimes made my dysphoria flare briefly, especially having someone watch me.

Adam took that vulnerable moment and made it tender and sexy as hell. He made me feel like it was the most natural thing in the world. Of course, him packing toys of his own helped, too. We get to make our own rules. That's what he told me. And I loved him for it. He truly made me feel like the man I'd always known I was. That with him, there was nothing I could do to change the way he looked at me. Fuck, it was euphoric and empowering and made me feel ten feet tall.

That and the way his body felt against mine, the way his smaller frame fit in my arms. He was absolutely perfect.

The next morning, we started out with a shower together, which quickly turned into a hot hand job session, leaving us both panting as we stood under the stream until the hot water ran out. Knowing Adam understood and respected my boundaries allowed me to fully embrace each random moment that came up between us. My guard was completely down, and I could simply be a man enjoying his boyfriend's touch and not bracing for a hand wandering where it shouldn't. Being with Adam was going to spoil me. But then, I couldn't imagine anyone else after him.

After we ate, I glanced at my phone to see the time, quirking my lips to the side. Before I could say anything, realization widened Adam's brown eyes. "You have a live today."

"Yeah, I need to get ready for it."

"This would be the time I would be hurrying home to get ready to watch my favorite streamer."

I smiled at the idea of him rushing to watch me, and yet, here he was. "Or…"

Adam's brows arched. "Yeah?"

"You could watch it here"

"Like sit down here while you are recording upstairs?"

I shook my head. "No. Like, hang out with me in the studio and have a front row seat."

Adam came around the table and sat on my lap, throwing his arms around my neck. "OMG! Are you serious? I would love to watch you work."

"Yes, I'm serious. I'd love to have you there."

He peppered me with kisses. "Holy shit! I'm going to get to watch Locke_N_Load live!"

I chuckled at his excitement, as my hands went to his hips, pulling him closer. "And I get to have my number one fan in the room with me. Sounds like a win-win."

We headed back upstairs, and I got one of my branded long-sleeve shirts on and checked my hair. Adam put on his black club pants, but when I realized with all of the things he packed in his Keroppi backpack, a second shirt wasn't one of them. I gave him one of mine, and he clutched it, staring at my logo.

"A Locke shirt! This is so cool. I feel like I won the lottery."

I snorted. "You're so easy to please."

"Not denying it." Adam pulled the shirt on.

"Come on, I gotta get everything set up."

I grabbed a chair from my room and brought it into the studio, setting it on the side of the room where it would be off-camera. Adam followed me in and sat in the chair.

"Are you sure it's okay if I'm in here?"

"Yes. I have a shotgun mic that is designed for precise sound pick-up in front of the mic, so it helps to eliminate background noise. So, unless you're clanging around, it should be fine."

Adam shook out his hands. "I feel weirdly anxious, like I'm on holy ground or something."

I couldn't help the smile that tugged at my lips at his concern. "It'll be fine, I swear. If you stay in this range, you'll stay out of camera, but it's not a huge deal if you pop up on screen."

Since hearing about the possibility of the Play OUT Loud Award, I'd spent the past few weeks feeling stressed over making everything perfect and pushing myself harder than ever. Then Adam came into my life, and I spent less time worrying and more time smiling. If everything wasn't perfect, it wouldn't be the end of the world. Sure, the award would be career-changing, but I had a career I was happy with, even if I got a little lost with it at times.

Being around Adam, seeing his exuberance for everything he did, and playing games with him simply for the sake of fun, had been the reminder I needed that I got to play for my job, and I had a lot of loyal viewers without an award. Yes, I worked my ass off for it, but there were a lot of other Adams out there that planned their days around my content, and that was pretty fucking amazing. Okay, there weren't any other Adams—he was one of a kind—but there were other fans whose names I saw show up in the chatbox regularly.

The chair I placed was closer to the edge of my desk on the side where my secondary camera was connected, so Adam sat behind it. He could see most of my screen from there.

Opening OBS, the online broadcasting system most streamers used, I set up the screen and chatbox the way I preferred and set the lighting in my room to green, thinking of my Keroppi king at my side. I opened the game I'd been doing a play-through of and went to my most recent saved game. Once everything was ready, I winked at Adam, before hitting live. Within seconds, the chatbox filled with emotes.

"Welcome back, gamers. I'm Locke. Today, I'll be passing the point of no return for the main quest as I head into the final boss battle. It's important to check your health and supplies before you cross this point, because once you do, you are stuck with what you have."

Adam let out a quiet squeal and did a silent clap as he watched me, making one side of my lip tug up. "I'm going to collect as many medicinal plants as I can, and I'll check the surrounding area for any tool boxes or metal shards. You also want to make sure all of your weapons are upgraded as much as they can be and that you've used all of your skill points. I once went into a boss fight with eight skill points available, just sitting there, and got my ass spanked. No reason to make it harder on yourself if you don't have to."

I glanced over at Adam and shot him a pointed look, as if to say, the message was directly for him, since he loved to do things the hard way. Adam stuck his middle finger up, and I had to stifle the laugh that wanted to pop out.

It was different having someone to interact with in person while I was gaming. Talking to yourself in a room alone had taken a lot of getting used to at first. The people that were watching could respond in the chatbox or with cheers, but it was still a one-way conversation for the most part.

"Alright, folks, I'm as stocked as I can be. Who's ready?" My eyes slid to the chatbox to see it explode with excitement. Adam grinned at me and pumped his fists in the air. "Okay. Here we go."

I passed through the warning that said I was entering the final quest and ran toward the ruins; the music grew ominous. Adam grabbed a rainbow duck off my desk, squeezing it in his hand as he watched enraptured. When he let it go, it squeaked, and he mouthed ‘ sorry ' before putting it back. I snickered to myself, amused at how careful he was trying to be. The amusement ended as a shadow passed over my character, and I felt my body tense, ready for the series of intense battles I knew were to come.

I talked through the first battle, describing each action and counter-action. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Adam discover the duck with a dick, and could see a smile appear as he examined it. The momentary distraction caused me to get side-swiped by an armored beast, sending my character flying.

"Suck a duck!" The chatbox cheered as it always did when I said the catchphrase. Adam looked at the duck in his hand and I heard him whisper, "Don't mind if I do."

I was trying to pay attention to the powerful beast that was attacking me, but I couldn't help but let my attention slip as Adam opened his mouth and sucked on the duck's dick. His eyes closed, and he moved it in and out of his mouth, a quiet moan sneaking from him, making a laugh pop out of me.

I paused the game and shook my head, unable to contain my amusement. Adam stopped mid-blow, and his eyes flew open. "Oh, shit! Sorry."

The chatbox was going wild, trying to figure out what was happening. It was very rare that I paused in the middle of a game, but especially in the middle of a fight.

A Whisper chat window appeared, with Stubby reacting as well.

DubDubMcStubbs: What happened? Everything okay?

Okay, so clearly I wasn't being as careful as I thought, and it was obvious something was going on. I sent a quick reply back as my eyes darted toward Adam.

Me: All good. Hang on and I'll explain.

I faced the camera. "My apologies to you all, but my boyfriend is here with me today, and I find myself a little distracted."

A lot of expletives appeared in the chat. ‘ Boyfriend ?!!!' ‘ Who is he?' ‘We want to meet him!'

Stubbs: Holy shit! You have a boyfriend? Since when?

"Excuse me, everyone. Just give me a quick minute." I muted my mic and turned toward Adam. A few weeks ago, I might have been bothered that my livestream had gone off-track, but I didn't care anymore. Adam was worth every second of off-track-ness. He made me so damn happy, and I was eager to share that with others. "I'm muted, Adam."

Worry filled his features. "OMG. I'm so sorry, baby, I got carried away. I didn't mean to interrupt. I should just wait downstairs."

"You're fine, Adam. It was funny. But they are asking to meet you. What do you think?"

"Me? They want to meet me?"

"Seems only fair. Let them see the gorgeous man that distracted me."

His cheeks pinked, but he gave me a smile. "Are you sure? I don't want to steal your thunder."

"I think that ship has already sailed. But I don't mind, and I'd be thrilled to show you off and tell the world you're mine."

Adam beckoned me toward him, so I rolled my chair closer, and when I was off camera, he smashed his mouth against mine. "You're very sweet, and I really am sorry."

"I'm not. Now, what do you think? They're all waiting. Dead air is no good for streaming."

Adam's eyes darted to my computer then back to me. "If we do this, it can't be undone. It will be out there for everyone to see."

"I know." I brushed my knuckles over his cheek. "You're stuck with me."

That sweet smile of his appeared before he shook his head and blew out a deep breath. "Okay."

I rolled back to my place in front of my screen and held out my hand. Unmuting the mic, I said, "Thanks for hanging in there, I know this isn't how I usually do things, but this man has become really important to me, and now I'm honored to introduce him to you all."

Adam grabbed my hand, and I pulled him close, until he was sitting in my lap, so that both of our faces appeared in the center of the camera. "Everyone, this is Adam. Adam, this is everyone."

He gave a wave. "Hi."

I wrapped my arm around his waist and kissed his cheek. "Some things to know about Adam; he loves history, he's a terrible gamer, and he makes me incredibly happy."

Waving emotes filled the chatbox and cheers flew across the screen, dinging to announce the tips I was getting. That was unexpected. I was hoping by introducing him, it would help stave off any frustrated fans at my unusual conduct with the game, but I didn't anticipate the celebration that would happen.

When Adam heard all the pings and saw the chatbox flood with support, he turned to face me. "What just happened?"

I muted the mic. "I think they like you, or like seeing us together."

"I can't believe I'm on your stream."

Squeezing him around his waist, I said, "I know. Me neither, but I'm really glad you are."

I unmuted once more. "Alright. So, there's a personal update for you all, how about I try to get back to the game now?"

Adam blew a kiss at the screen. "You're all so nice, thank you for the warm welcome."

He slid off my lap and returned to the chair. But I indicated with my head for him to move closer. Adam brought the chair to my side, so he was in the frame with me.

"Now that you know he's here, I hope you don't mind if I keep him close for moral support. Let's finish this thing."

A wave of rainbows and excited emotes flooded the chat, making me smile. Now, this felt right. To have him at my side doing what I loved. He tried to stay quiet at first, but soon was reacting and commenting on what I was doing, and as far as I could tell from the quick glances at the chat, the audience was eating it up.

When I found myself face to face with the final boss, Adam shouted, "Go get ‘em baby!"

I couldn't help but smile at hearing the endearment. Knowing everyone that was watching had heard him, seeing that I was taken, completely, and showing the man I loved to the world I lived in, made my heart explode. Just like the boss did when I dealt the final blow.

Adam cheered and kissed my cheek, the chatbox went wild, and I found myself smiling bigger than I ever did when I beat a game, because it wasn't just the game that was complete. It was me.

Stubbs: He's a cutie, Locke. Happy for you, bruh!

Me: Thanks, man. I'm happy, too.

"Alright, thanks for tuning in for this special livestream. Until next time, I'm Locke, your favorite trans gamer." I looked over at Adam and indicated for him to say something.

"And I'm Adam, riding shotgun."

"And we're…" I waved for him to join me, and we said the final part together, "Breaking the binary…code."

We both waved, and I ended the video, pulling him into my arms. "You were amazing, Adam."

"OMG! I can't believe that happened. I feel like a celebrity."

"You were adorable, and everyone loved you. But how could they not? I love you."

He sucked in a sharp breath. "You do?"

"Yes, very much! You've brought so much light into my life, showing me how to have fun again. You also make me feel whole. Being with you makes me feel like the man I always wanted to be."

"Oh, baby!" Adam pecked a quick kiss on my lips. "I love you, too. I still feel like I need to pinch myself that this is all really happening. You're plenty man enough on your own, but I get what you mean. I feel so comfortable with you, like I've known you forever. And maybe a part of that is cheating, since I've watched you for years through a camera, but this feels so big and so real with you. When I'm with you, I feel like I'm home."

I let out a happy sigh as I looked at him. Home. My house was so much more alive with him in it. "I am so lucky that you are a terrible gamer."

Adam laughed and lightly hit my chest. "See? It's about the journey. Where would we be if you hadn't felt the need to give me advice?"

"I have no idea. But I'm glad I don't have to imagine it, because you're here, and here is where you belong."

I felt the rush after streaming that I used to get early on when I first started having followers. Adrenaline pumping through me and needing to go somewhere, and I knew exactly where it needed to go.

"Come on." I stood and held my hand out.

Adam took it. "Where are we going?"

"To celebrate your first livestream."

I led him across the hallway back to my room. Our clothes flung in every direction along the way and soon we collapsed into bed again, both gloriously naked. I climbed on top of him and looked over his body, admiring every inch of him. His chest was still taped, and the black x's on his chest were sexy as hell.

"Fuck, you are so beautiful. I love your body, Adam."

"I love yours, too, Locke. Every inch of you. I want to feel you, just you. I've been on PrEP and have used protection with other partners since I last tested negative. But I have some internal condoms in my bag if we need them."

"We don't need them. It's been, uh, a while for me, but I was negative after being with them. You sure about this?"

"Yes. You and I…stuck together, baby."

Adam widened his legs, giving me room to nestle between them, and I bent over him and kissed him. With every moment of joy, euphoria, and affirmation he gave me, I poured them into the kiss. With each laugh and smile, and pulling me out of my comfort zone, I returned them. Words we spoke, words we didn't, I let them seep from my mouth to his. Every minute that we'd spent together, and every one that would come in our future, I counted on his lips.

When I pulled back, he cupped my cheek and stared at me with complete trust and admiration, making my heart swell. My dick, too. "I love you, Locke."

There was nothing greater in all of time than hearing him say my name like that. "Fuck, I love you so damn much!"

My hand trailed down his chest and wrapped under his thigh. As I hooked it over my hip, an idea came to me, and I tapped his nose up with mine to get his attention. "How flexible are you?"

His brown eyes glinted with heat. "I'm bendy enough. What do you have in mind?"

"Putting your legs behind your head and fucking into you."

His head was already bobbing. "Yes. One thousand percent, yes."

I sat back and moved the pillow out of the way so his head was flat on the bed. Grabbing his legs, I pushed them up until his feet were above his head. "Are you okay?"

"Yes, you can push them more."

I did, pushing until his feet were pressed against the headboard and his butt lifted slightly off the bed. His glistening folds revealed fully like a pretty little package waiting for me. Getting to my feet, I positioned myself over him and squatted down until my dick was enveloped by his wet heat, making us both gasp.

"Okay still?"

Adam stared at me from between his legs. "Fuck, yes. You feel so good. Ride me, baby."

Rocking in and out of him, his body stroking me, it was euphoric as hell getting to do this with my own anatomy. Adam's mouth had worked wonders on my dick, but seeing our bodies joined like this and feeling the sensation of being inside him practically made me delirious with ecstasy. I pushed up and the head of my dick brushed against Adam's clit, making him mewl. Adam gripped his legs with his arms to help hold them in place, and I continued, pumping inside him.

I was so hard and my tip so sensitive that it wasn't long before I felt that fireball building in my groin as I bounced on top of Adam. He grunted and whimpered with each movement.

"Fuck, Adam. I'm gonna come."

"Do it, baby, come inside me."

With his encouragement, I felt the release rip through me like an atom bomb as I came hard. "Ngh!" I felt my dick twitching as the orgasm continued. I swear I went cross-eyed for a moment, the world going blurry around me.

Once my vision cleared, I climbed off Adam, to relieve him from the position he was in, helping him slowly lower his legs. He was breathing rapidly and his face was flushed, but a sexy smile stretched his lips.

"Mmm. You felt so good, Locke." His hand drifted down to cup me. "This is my favorite dick. Can I keep it?"

I chuckled before kissing him. "It's a package deal."

"Mmm. Good, because I'm keeping you, too, baby."

I loved the way that sounded, for him to keep me, because I planned to do the same. Keep him and hold him and call him mine.

"And I get to keep this, too." I reached between his legs, finding his nub, and stroked him. Adam began breathing hard again and pushed up against my hand.

"I'm all yours, baby," Adam panted out. I tried to follow the cues he gave, loving when I found the spot that made him whimper. Working him harder and faster, wringing such wonderful sounds out of him until he let out a shout, and I could feel him pulsing as his release burst from him.

Adam's eyes closed with contentment, looking so peaceful and beautiful. It had been an incredible experience, one I never thought I would have, but he was so open and so willing to explore with me, and it was truly satisfying in the most euphoric way. I loved this man so much. I wanted a lifetime of moments like this with him. Just us, no inhibitions or societal expectations. We got to make our own rules and love each other the way we wanted to. He was a gift I would forever be grateful for.

I bent down, kissed him, and whispered against his lips. "Democracy."

"I told you I would teach you good, baby."

After making it official online, and after a few weeks together in our little love bubble, we decided it was time to tell our families. We met up with my parents for dinner one night, and they had instantly fallen in love with Adam. How could you not? He was outgoing and talked easily with everyone I'd seen him with. I loved watching him with others and knowing that I was the one who got to take him home. I didn't have any doubts about my parents with Adam—they had been my biggest supporters when it came to my identity—but it was the first time I'd introduced them to someone, too.

They seemed to understand quickly this was serious, and Adam was it for me. They weren't the touchiest-feeliest folks, but they'd welcomed him easily. After we got back home, we went to the studio to use the webcam and screen I had set up.

"Your folks were easy. They were so nice, too. It's no wonder they have such an incredible son," Adam said as we sat side-by-side in front of the screen. "Mine are…well…I promise to make it up to you for putting up with them."

"I'm sure it will be fine, but I'm not above taking you up on the offer." I kissed his cheek.

"Okay. Here goes." Adam hit the video call button on their Facebook chat. They lived hours away, and Adam happily used my responsibilities as an excuse not to visit them in person.

The trilling ring sounded. And sounded. It took a few minutes for his parents to figure out how to answer the call or where to look. When they responded, they were shouting into the speaker. Luckily, I had equipment that helped me control input and output, and I was able to bring their volume down, making Adam give me a thumbs up.

"Hi, Ma, Dad."

"Hi, sweetie. Can you hear us okay? These things are always so complicated. I wish you could have just come down for a visit instead." Adam met my gaze and gave me a flat look.

"We can hear you fine, Ma. And like I told you, it's too hard to get away right now. But I'd really like to introduce you to someone special. This is my boyfriend, Locke."

I cleared my throat, suddenly feeling nervous. I lived my life on video chats but had never done the meet-the-parents thing before. Adam gave me a reassuring squeeze on my leg. "Hi, Mr. and Mrs. Goldman. It's a pleasure to meet you."

"Oh, my. Aren't you handsome?" Her eyes darted past us, and I realized she must have been seeing my trans flag on the wall behind us. A smile stretched on her face. Did knowing I was trans like her son help her feel better about us? I know it did, me. I loved that it was something we shared, even through our differences. I'd never felt as comfortable with anyone like I did him. "Tell us about yourself. Our son hasn't deemed to bother giving us any details."

I could practically feel the eye roll that I knew Adam was suppressing. I'd overheard him talking to them on the phone, but apparently this was how they tended to play things.

"Well, I, uh, I believe you know I'm a pro-gamer? I've worked really hard building up my brand and my following."

Adam's dad came on screen. "Do you make a good living for yourself?"

"Dad!" Adam bit out.

I let out a soft chuckle. "I'm comfortable."

"Comfortable, how?"

"You really don't need to answer that," Adam grumbled.

I glanced at him and offered him a soft smile. "It's okay." Turning back to the screen, I continued. "I bought my own place in South End, and I don't normally have to think about my finances."

His father nodded. "That's great to hear."

"This isn't an interview. Locke doesn't need to tell you his social security number or give you a bank statement. All you need to know is that I love him, and we are really happy together."

His mom's face popped back on the screen, face very close to the camera. "I'm sorry, sweetie, but you know we worry about you and just want to make sure you're going to be taken care of."

"Ugh!" Adam's head fell back with exasperation. I didn't mind the questions so much, but I knew Adam got tired of their hovering.

"I love your son. Adam makes me smile every day, and he has quickly become the most important person in my life. I couldn't imagine what I would do without him, and I plan to take care of him for the rest of my life. Just like he takes care of me, which he is great at, by the way. We have formed a…perfect union." I slid my glance to Adam, and he responded with a laugh at the nod to his preamble of the constitution of fucking.

"Oh, Adam, dear. It makes us so happy to know that you're not alone in the city anymore. And, Locke, you seem lovely. Thank you for caring for our boy. I do hope you come and see us sometime."

I coughed to cover the laugh that popped out when Adam pretended to gag. "We'll make it out when we can."

"Okay, dear. We'll talk soon. Love you, sweetie."

"Bye, love you," Adam replied before shutting off the video and slumped on the desk. "Phew, glad that's over."

"Oh, they weren't so bad. They just care about you."

"Yeah, they'll care about me to death." He turned toward me suddenly with a light gleaming in his eyes. "Did you mean it?"

The abrupt change in demeanor had me confused. "Mean what?"

"That you want me for the rest of your life?"

I pointed my finger between us. "You, me, stuck. Forever. Not someday, Adam, now , and always."

He grinned broadly before climbing into my lap and folding his arms around my neck. "You're the one thing I never thought to put on my dream board, yet here you are…making all of my dreams come true."

"You've made mine come true, too, in ways I never expected. Which fits really well, because you are always surprising me. I love you so much, Adam." I kissed him hard, holding him against me, where he belonged.

"I love you, too, baby. So fucking much, I can't even explain it." His brows arched and a broad smile stretched his lips. "Speaking of surprises, I almost forgot. I have something for you."

"You do?"

"Yes! Stay right there, I'll be back." He pecked another kiss before climbing out of my lap and racing to my bedroom. Well, our bedroom. In the weeks since he'd first stayed the night, he started coming over more regularly, bringing more things with him each time.

A few minutes had passed, and I grabbed my duck with a dick from my desk, turning it over in my hand while I waited. Holding it had me thinking of Adam blowing it and moaning. It was ridiculous but got me hard all the same. Though my body reacted to pretty much everything he did.

Footsteps sounded behind me, and Adam knocked on the door frame. When I turned around, my jaw dropped. He stood before me wearing his full costume for work: breeches, vest, waistcoat, and that huge hat.

"Surprise!"

"Wow, Adam. Shit! You look so fucking hot in that."

He turned around and lifted the tails of his coat, giving his ass a slap. "Ready to fuck me like a founding father?"

"Fuck, yes!"