Chapter 33

A long, warm shower was just what I needed to distract myself from my thoughts. I felt newly invigorated because Alejandro wasn't the ogre I had built him out to be in my head. I was feeling reborn, relieved, almost happy about my circumstances, which could have been so much worse it seemed.

As usual, Dolores did not disappoint. She had done much more than borrow some clothes from her daughter. She had asked her to properly shop for me, as evidenced by the fact that most of the clothes still had their tags on them. I arranged all the clothes in the closet, happy to see that Dolores's daughter had thought of all the details, from shoes to underwear, and had coordinated the outfits.

I chose to wear a beachy short blue dress with small white flowers. I liked how it perfectly grabbed my breasts. The bottom had fringes and stopped a few inches above my knees. I enjoyed the hair products and fluffed my curls. I lathered on some sunscreen and put on some of the new makeup.

No matter what I did, the memory of the morning was always there. I could not help smiling, like a teenager, when the feelings flooded my brain, but the enjoyment was always followed by a bit of guilt. I was starting to feel free to let what had been rising inside of me for a while now flourish, but what was the point?

While he never meant to harm me, there was still a purpose for him, a purpose I now knew I could help fulfill. While his words made my heart flutter, I was ashamed to let him touch me like that after what I knew and what I didn't know. The other issue was the decision I had to make: whether to tell him about the diamonds or not.

As the afternoon was coming to an end, I went looking for Alejandro. He was nowhere to be found. Dolores was already gone, but she had left the house spotless and the kitchen filled with food and small cakes.

As the sun was setting, I ventured down to the water for fresh air. After just a few minutes on the patio, I heard some voices coming off the beach in my direction. As I got up to take a look, I saw Alejandro and Elena, her arm wrapped around his, peacefully strolling, slowly heading to her house. I felt like someone had just punched me in my stomach. I quickly headed back to the house. The last thing I wanted was for them to see me see them together.

I ran inside and went directly to my bedroom, violently closing the door behind me. I started pacing with anger. How could I have been so stupid? Spending the day looking for him, dreaming of our next moment together, when I knew damn well that he had a girlfriend, a girl he had known since he was a child, even if he had denied it. Someone he had a lot more in common with than me—the woman he had called spoiled. How could I possibly compete with that?

I heard some voices coming from the living room. I was tempted to go there and just scream, but my pride was stronger. I piled up all the shirts I had borrowed from his closet to bring them to his room and drop them in his hamper. I no longer needed them, nor did I want them.

While I was about to leave his room, I heard footsteps outside his door. My heart skipped a beat as I expected to see Alejandro with Elena in his arms, but Alejandro walked in alone, looking even tanner, wearing a pair of cotton pants with a light-gray shirt. I was doing my best to keep my cool.

"How are you?" he asked.

"Good, where were you?"

I bit my lip, but jealousy was now driving the ship. I was blind with it and, frankly, was throwing caution and calm behavior to the wind.

Alejandro lifted his chin, looking at me through small eyes.

"I had a few things to take care of," he answered, hands in his pockets.

"You don't say," I said coldly. I could feel my face boiling.

"What's bothering you?" he asked as he got closer to me.

I took a deep breath, turning around in an attempt to avoid his gaze.

"I'm not bothered," I lied. "Just curious; you disappeared."

Alejandro gently grabbed me by the arm, slowly turning me to face him.

"What do you really want to ask me?"

He was scrutinizing me, following my eyes wherever I was trying to hide them.

"Okay." I sighed. I didn't have anything to lose as long as I could keep my cool.

"What exactly is your relationship with Elena?"

"She is a good friend," he explained. "We grew up together. She's always been there for me."

"Friends? Please. How stupid do you think I am? Friends don't act like that. She was kissing you when you were sick, that day I found her in your room. She kissed you again the other day."

"I see. And? Are you jealous?" he teased.

"Jealous?" My tone was higher than I intended.

I gave him my best fake laugh.

"Jealous of what? You and her?" I ripped my arm from his hold.

"Well, you are asking me for an explanation you think I owe you, aren't you?"

The audacity of this man, putting it on me to define what was going on between us. It enraged me.

"That doesn't make me jealous!" I shouted, my lips thin with frustration. "I have a right to know where you are."

"And what gives you this right?" he pressed, his brows lifted, with that irritating smirk.

It was as if he thought he was asking me a question he knew the answer to.

"Forget it. I don't have time for this," I said, walking past him to leave the room.

My feelings were getting the best of me, and it was time to do what I did best—flee. But Alejandro held me by my arm as I attempted to leave.

"She's not my girlfriend, Amelia." He smiled.

I rolled my eyes.

"Hmm, you have to stop doing that," he warned.

"What?"

"Rolling your eyes like that."

A trembling sigh left my throat. "Why?"

"It makes me want to punish you."

Jesus and all the saints. What the hell was he doing? Why did I feel like a current was forming in my stomach? I cleared my throat. No, I wasn't going to get distracted.

"Well, your friend certainly seems to think you are much more. She told me she was." He smiled, and I snapped. "What?!"

"I love seeing you like this."

I turned my head away, trying to hide the heat I felt rising to my face again. My pride told me to stop this, but my heart needed to know.

"Why does she act like you're hers, then?"

"Well," he said hesitantly, "we used to date when we were younger, but we broke up a long time ago. She then dated David until his death. She is a little protective of me, that's all."

I pulled against his firm grip, walking away from him, my arms crossed for self-support.

"She seems to be in need of a clarification from you," I pushed.

I knew what I saw. And he wasn't helping.

"I agree," he admitted. "If it will make you happy, I will clarify things with her. Frankly, I have before, and I did again today."

Alejandro started walking toward me again. I needed a distraction, or I would end up on that window again, the thought causing a painful wave of desire to invade me.

"What about Karina?"

"Ah, yes, well, Mathias and I have been planning what to do for a while, and in that process, she and I got…close…but it wasn't serious."

"You guys slept together."

"Yes," he answered with a low, calm voice.

I wanted to slap the calmness out of his face. Jealousy was making me blind, even if deep down I knew I had no right. We were having a staring contest, Alejandro waiting for me to react.

"When was the last time you slept with Elena?"

Alejandro lifted a brow, surprised by my boldness I assume, but I didn't care.

"You said I could ask, and I see no need to tiptoe around the topic."

"Very well. Elena and I slept together a few weeks ago, give or take," he admitted, jaw tightened, eyes darkening. I noticed his Adam"s apple move down as he swallowed hard.

"That's what I thought," I said, trying to hide the pinch I felt in my heart. "It"s no wonder she is confused. And she was dating your brother, for Christ's sake. Who does that?" He flinched. Jealousy was searing through my veins.

"It was a mistake on our part. We let grief get the best of us. But I was very clear, even afterward, even today. It was before you, Amelia."

I shook my head. "Goodnight, Alejandro."

I rushed out of the room and headed straight to the bathroom, where I could let out a scream of frustration. I decided to take a bath. I needed to control what clearly was a desire to destroy every other women Alejandro had ever touched.

I had hoped the episode earlier would have satisfied my itch, calmed down my desire for this man, but I feared I was more on edge now than I was before.

As the day started, my mind was made up. I needed to swim, try to exercise more, to calm my hot head…and my heart. After having a small fruit bowl for breakfast, I put on a pink bikini I had found in the luggage of clothes.

The bikini fit well, thankfully. It didn't cover as much as I would normally prefer, but it was the only one I had. I put some oil in my hair, some sunscreen on my skin, and covered up with a long, white, cotton shirt. I put on a pair of beach sandals, and after I grabbed a towel, I headed outside.

The sun was warm but not too hot. The air was dry and just perfect for the first week of September. I enjoyed the feeling of the salty wind and a light amount of sand hitting my body.

I put my bag down on one of the long chairs located under the pergola, removed my cover up, and then walked as fast as I could to the water. I cherished the feeling of the cool water on my skin, the sound of the waves, and the feeling of freedom and awe for the force of nature I always felt when I floated in the ocean.

I swam to my heart"s content, unable to hide the smile of satisfaction that drew on my face after each lap, enjoying how the water carried me around, making me feel weightless and worry free, as if the water had taken all my responsibilities, all my problems, and washed them away. I scooped up some sand and rubbed it on my skin to exfoliate.

Nature had a way of forcing a person to live in the moment, and I needed that more than anything. The crash of the waves filled my brain every time I dived, making me focus on the task at hand instead of the turmoil inside of me. I loved swimming. I used to go to the ocean in California as much as possible, even when it was cold.

The very expensive swimming lessons Richard had forced me to take, because the daughter of some business contact was going, actually were a blessing for me, providing me with an outlet to exercise and relieve stress. I swam until my arms and legs were too tired to support my weight, the numbness very welcome, making me feel grounded. An exhaustion that calmed my raging thoughts.

It was close to an hour when I gave in. I reluctantly walked back to the pergola. The sun was now hotter than before, so it was the perfect time to go in the shade and take a break.

To my surprise, there was Alejandro, standing by one of the poles, dressed in all white linen, scanning my body from head to toe, with no shame or discretion. I felt weak in my knees, recognizing my own raw desire in his eyes, but I had to walk to the pergola. It was too late to change course.