12. The Pancakes, Beau

Dallas, Texas

Thursday

"I can't drive your car," I said in such a way as to convey my utter disbelief at the mere thought of being behind the wheel of a two-hundred-thousand-dollar vehicle.

"Beau," Dash said in his classic I-can't-believe-your-stubbornness tone. "Drive me to school then return for me in about three hours. It'll give you time to drive around and become familiar with the area. Look for the companies that offer the jobs you want." Repeating it a second time did in fact make the idea sound more absurd.

Since waking this morning—in a figurative way, we never actually slept a wink last night, I now had the full scope of Dash's extravagant lifestyle—private jets, chauffeurs, expensive cars, and a badass house—I felt more confident than ever that I didn't fit in.

"Thank you, Jacob," Dash said when his side door opened.

Jacob was one of the Richmond family drivers. And there was no way I'd wait for him to open my door. I got out on my own, because I wasn't a small child, and headed for the trunk for my bags. With Dash's normal flair, no matter the rush, he spent several seconds smoothing out his clothing. I didn't remember wrinkles being such a problem for Dash before. If a possible hair went rogue, that would have to be rearranged too.

Even though we were in another typical back-and-forth, this time I stood my ground. Dash's flashy ride was way out of my league. I'd be too self-conscious and have a wreck due to my own anxiety. I needed a spacious vehicle that wouldn't break the bank to drive. Something like a pre-owned Silverado.

The trunk opened automatically on my approach. My eyes narrowed at such a feature. This was a fancy ride too.

"I got it," I said as Dash came around the trunk. The driver followed, quickening his steps.

"It's all right, Jacob. He frustratingly tends to do this," Dash explained.

Dash wore a fresh turtleneck that accentuated his long neck and covered the evidence of my desire—hickeys to be exact, and the suit jacket he wore to the wedding, but Dallas had had a significant drop in temperature. One of Dash's hands was stuck awkwardly in the jacket pocket, the other held a set of keys out to me.

I shook my head. I wasn't driving the car. "Calm down. These are for the house. You're the most maddening person alive."

As I pulled the luggage from the back of the vehicle, Jacob began a low rumble of laughter, trying his best to keep it inside. Dash tilted his chin toward the driver, a brow arched critically.

"What? Dash," Jacob said. "You know this is funny. You always get your way."

"Apparently not any longer." His no-nonsense tone and sharp words had me doing a double take. Dash nodded the driver back into the vehicle.

Jacob had driven the Richmond family for decades. Based on the conversation from the airport to Dash's place, the driver and Dash had a great relationship. He brushed off Dash's tone and went back to the driver's seat.

"You need to get to school." I hoisted the last bag, which contained almost everything I owned, from the trunk. It wasn't much. Easy enough for one trip into the house. "Are you takin' your bookbag?" I asked, surprised to find Dash had moved closer, standing inches from me by the trunk. My guy didn't care who saw him. While that was a good trait, it wasn't one I shared. Dash rubbed his hand across the curve of my ass for the world to see.

"What're you doin'?" I hissed, but it wasn't the question it might seem.

"The best part about being together is that I can do that whenever I want."

"Was there an answer about the bookbag in anything you just said?"

"You're such a challenge," he replied, staying all in my space. "I'll take the bookbag. Kiss me. I loved last night."

I leaned in for a swift, chaste kiss, something based on Dash's stern facial features, he didn't like, and I took several steps backward. "We do that inside the house." Although I sounded gruff and drawing lines all over the place, I didn't really mean it. I was in love. It made me vulnerable. I had a lot changing on me very quickly, but I didn't fear it with Dash by my side. And I was certainly going to walk him to his car to get tucked safely inside.

The ridiculous melancholy that had haunted me all morning kicked up a notch. I agreed to be in the house waiting for his return to spend another night just like last night. I figured we'd need more sleep. Dash barely closed his eyes, me, not at all, due to being lost in staring at the beautiful man currently beside the automatically closing trunk.

"Good luck today," I murmured, "Get inside your car so I can go inside."

"Mr. Beau," Amelia's cheerful voice echoed from the porch. "I'm so happy to see you."

I couldn't resist the beam I gave. She was like a warm hug on this chilly day.

"I have to go," Dash called, waving at Amelia, already halfway to his car. "Amelia, we're a couple now. He's moving in with me." He shot me a wink, tossing his bookbag in the backseat. "Come kiss me goodbye. Pretend you'll miss me. I'll miss you." He motioned for me to follow him to the driver's side. Both my body and my brain propelled me to him. They left me no choice in the matter.

"I thought I kissed you enough last night," I teased quietly. Dash stood with the car door open, waiting for me. I kissed him quickly with hints of passion. Perhaps Amelia saw us or heard the conversation, I wasn't sure.

My insecurity was shedding off me in waves.

His hand patted my chest. "That was yesterday. This is today. Last night, you set the standard of expectation." He pursed his lips tighter. I obliged and kissed him again. "We're in the honeymoon phase."

"Go to school," I said at his silliness, fixing the straps on my shoulder to keep the bags from falling forward. "Do well on your test."

"Always." The confidant, cocky expression spoke more of truth than arrogance.

"I'll be here holdin' down the fort, job-huntin'. Go so you can get home faster." I started nodding and moving away from the car toward the front door. He had the classic, old school Hollywood actor appearance and charm. Dash's indecision played out in different expressions on his adorable face. He battled whether to go or stay. I easily read him.

Amelia's soft chuckle drew me her way again. She appeared genuinely excited to see me. It felt good to be wanted. The dry winter grass crunched under my feet as I went her way.

No matter how I tried, last night stayed in the forefront of my mind. I'd be waiting for Dash to return, naked in his bed. I'd also think about bottoming. Dash's many suggestions that I needed to try kept running through my head. I'd figure it out soon enough, but not today.

The warm flush on my cheeks intensified as sling-shot images flashed inside my head. Last night, I sucked dick and swallowed like a pro, so did Dash. It felt like something we'd be doing a lot. It wasn't near as intrusive as I suspected when Dash's finger played inside my ass.

"You're back, just like he said you'd be," Amelia said, smiling brightly, moving out of the way to let me by. "Hurry inside. You look cold." She misinterpreted what was happening to me. I was hot. Steaming hot. "Dash said you like eggs and bacon—less carbs—but I made you my mother's special recipe pancakes. It's a good morning that you're back."

Stepping inside the house felt like the place I was meant to be. The feeling of belonging was so special I'd happily eat those pancakes. "My mom makes a mean pancake too. I love those things. Do I have time to put these in Dash's room?"

"Absolutely, I'll start them now."

She went one way. I went the other. I was twelve hours into happiness. It felt damn good.

In the place between awake and asleep, something tickled my nose. I did my best to ignore it, telling my brain to shut it off. Exhaustion was a bitch that owned me right now. Of course the nuisance didn't listen. The brush came again, this time across my cheek. I should turn. Whatever bothered me would be disrupted, but I couldn't make myself move. Dash was cupped against my body, and I didn't want to disturb him.

The way his heavy breaths came in slow, long intervals, I doubted he'd wake.

The flicker happened again. I opened my eyelids. The room was dark, cozy, and warm with the fans circulating the air. Realization dawned as I glanced down. Dash's silky hair against my face was the culprit. That was an easy enough problem to fix if only I had a hand to use, but both my arms were wrapped securely around Dash, who clung to them tightly.

Since I'd rather cut my arms off than move from his hold, I had a problem. Only then did I register the strong urge to go to the bathroom. The stakes changed. I drew in a deep breath, and with as little disruption as possible, I untangled from Dash's hold and scooted from the warm blankets. I instantly changed my mind about the warmth in the room. The chill went through me in an instant. The eerie sounds of wind blew like a blizzard outside. The protectively covered palm trees bent under the assault of the weather.

I moved a little faster as I went to the bathroom. If I let my thoughts go, I'd wake myself up, but that didn't seem to matter to this head of mine. I silently shut the door behind me, keeping the light off to avoid waking Dash. Since I rarely cared about other people, it was a foreign thought to worry about his comfort.

Hell, I'd never slept in bed with another person, except for Dash years ago. I honestly believed I wouldn't like to cuddle, let alone to be wrapped around someone to go to sleep. Apparently, a lot of new ideologies were headed for me.

My thoughts shifted. A wicked smile came to my face as I realized how livid my father would be with me. If he hadn't died, I'd still be under his thumb. He controlled me like the bitch I became, or better yet, the one he'd created inside me. How my mom got tangled up with him in the first place was mind-blowing. Maybe he'd preyed on her like he had me.

I finished up in the bathroom and took careful steps back to bed. Dash wasn't where I'd left him, dreaming of the world we'd now build. He was on his back, arm over his eyes. He'd turned back the blankets for my arrival.

Even though he hadn't said I love you, and I had said it a few times now, he showed me with his actions, which was so much sweeter to experience. My random thoughts came together and calmed me as I watched him for my entire route to bed. I climbed in, dragging the covers with me as Dash rolled over to face me. He opened his tired eyes.

"I tried not to wake you," I whispered.

"I don't think you did. I think I sensed you were gone," he explained. I nudged closer to his unbelievably warm and inviting body. He shifted his head, allowing room for me on the comfortable pillow we shared. "You're cold. Why're you so cold?"

"Why is it so cold in this room?" I countered. The question must have been difficult because his brow wrinkled. My feet mixed with his. The icicles woke him completely, and his eyelids popped open for him to stare at me.

"Why're your feet so cold? Did you go outside?"

"Did you turn the heater down?" I asked.

"Oh yeah," he said after a long yawn. "I wanted us together when we slept, and thought we'd get too hot. What time is it?"

"I don't know, I didn't look." My palm slid over his hair, pushing the strands off his forehead. I liked them there, made him appear human, not the male model who walked off the pages of GQ magazine.

One of my arms pushed underneath the pillow, the other wrapped around him, drawing us closer together. "I was just thinkin' about how I've never slept with anyone but you before."

"Mmm," Dash murmured and rolled me onto my back. He followed, resting his cheek into the crook of my neck, his body halfway covering mine.

"What else did you think about?" he asked, his fingertips trailing softly over my skin.

He knew me well. "I didn't like my dad."

"Me either. What else?" he asked. "Your voice relaxes me."

"How much I love you," I said, leaving the last part of my thought unsaid.

He turned his face to mine, his eyes back to being only slight slits. He grinned at me, his lips puckering. I obliged the kiss. "I love hearing it."

"I think I would too," I murmured. It took several seconds for Dash to understand before he lifted again to see me.

"I tell you that I love you. I try to show it to you all the time. Am I missing the mark?"

"No, I feel it. You just haven't said it." I tucked my arm better around him. Then lifted my hand to his head to push it back down.

"I love you, Beau. Completely in love with you. You're more special to me than I gave you credit for, and I gave you lots of credit." He pressed his lips against my chest. It did help to him to say it aloud. I didn't know relief was tied to my feelings about Dash. It seemed the opposite in fact; I was confident in us. But the verbal reinforcement helped. "Do I need to wake up and figure out what's happening to you right now?"

"No, I'm good. It was nice to hear."

"Then I'll make sure to tell you more. The word love felt inadequate for the devotion I feel for you. I'm grateful that you've allowed me back…"

"Shh," I said, letting my hand massage whatever skin I could touch. "Go to sleep. Tomorrow's coming."

Maybe for the first time ever, Dash listened, then yawned again. His soft, even snores came fast. My guy was tired. I'd put him through too much. My eyes closed too.