Chapter 23

CHAPTER 23

Posey

I awaken to the sound of rain pattering softly against the window, the dull ambience of the streetlight filtering through my curtains and casting a muted glow throughout my bedroom. It’s the first week of March, and while the calendar says spring, the air still bites with winter’s chill. I pull the blanket up tighter around my shoulders, my thoughts drifting back to my whirlwind trip to Bahrain and the chaos that ensued.

After hours upon hours of travel, I finally returned home to Raleigh around midnight last night, completely drained. I had bouts of crying on the plane, silently weeping into a tissue kindly offered by a flight attendant, all while getting the side-eye from the man beside me. He clearly was uncomfortable around crying females, but I didn’t care. I’m a big believer in experiencing grief because you can’t heal until you do. While I remained dry-eyed while leaving Bahrain, the minute I got up in the air, the waterworks started and were on and off the entire time.

My eyes feel gritty as I peel myself from the bed, my muscles aching from the tension of the past few days. The sun’s not up yet, but the sky is a canvas of gray, threatening more rain. I shuffle to the bathroom, the cool tiles sending a jolt through me as I wash my face and brush my teeth. I look at my reflection—puffy eyes, hair in disarray—and I can’t help but let out a soft groan. It feels like I’ve stepped into a bad romance novel, and I’m the cliché heroine left heartbroken.

After a quick shower, I wrap myself in a fluffy robe and head to the kitchen. With a yawn, I flick on the coffee maker, listening to the familiar gurgling as I wait for the rich brew to fill the pot. My house is cozy, filled with my favorite comforts—pictures of me and my dad on the walls with a few special ones of my mother interspersed. Stacks of books teetering on the shelves, and the faint smell of lavender from the candles I light while I’m writing. But today, it feels empty, echoing with the weight of my heartache and I want to cry again.

“Suck it up, Posey,” I mutter.

Once I pour a steaming cup, I sit at the kitchen table and try to shake the feeling of sadness as I take small sips of the life-sustaining brew. I think about what was and what will never be. Lex’s kiss, the thrill of the formula world, the excitement of being in Bahrain—it all feels so far away.

Like a lifetime ago, really.

With a deep breath, I pull out my phone, hesitating for a moment before scrolling through the news. I have to know what the fallout is and start preparing myself for the worst.

I’m nervous as I search for updates about the race, but I can’t deny a small thrill that courses through me when I see that Lex won the Bahrain Global Prix. I have a genuine moment of pride and happiness for him, but then I give myself permission to wash it down the drain. I acknowledge my bitterness that I would have been by his side had things not gone horribly wrong, and it’s tinged with anger that I got blindsided by the press because of him.

A small part of me screams that he wouldn’t do that, but the fear lingers. Why would someone like me ever get a fairy-tale ending? I’m just an ordinary girl who tried to fit into an extraordinary world and somehow… this seems fitting because life isn’t full of happily ever afters.

As I read through other headlines, my heart sinks further. There’s a short article entitled, Romance Author Infiltrates Crown Velocity Under False Pretenses . I suppress a shudder as I click on it, take a deep breath and start to read.

In a shocking revelation, it has come to light that Posey Evans, an aspiring romance author, has been masquerading as a journalist to gain access to the high-stakes world of Crown Velocity Racing. The situation escalated just before the Bahrain Global Prix, leading to chaotic scenes in the paddock as reporters confronted Evans about her true identity.

I swallow hard, each word feeling like a dagger and my face heating with delayed mortification. My name is out there now, and it’s only a matter of time before this reaches the romance world. The article goes on, detailing the anonymous tip that revealed my secret and how I refused to comment on the allegations.

My eyes widen with shock as I read on:

Team principal Harley Patrick responded with an astounding claim that she had known about Ms. Evans’s true identity all along.

“I recognized Ms. Evans’s name as I’m a big fan of her romance fiction. I thought it was adorable that she was so passionate about her work that she was willing to attempt a dupe to get the inside track—no pun intended—on this sport,” Harley is quoted as saying. “Posey will bring a fresh perspective and new eyes to formula racing, and I believed it beneficial for both her and our team. FI is exploding in popularity and part of that is an ever-growing legion of female fans. I thought it would be great to have a female author shine light on the sport in a way that would bring more fans to the track.

“And it shouldn’t stop at fans. We have Brienne Norcross as the first female owner of an FI team, I’m the first female team principal, and we have women in all manner of important positions, from engineers to pit crew. One day soon, we’ll have a female driver at this level, and how great will it be to have an author out there writing love stories around that.”

A check of retailers and her author website shows that Posey Evans has been writing historical romance for the past three years with moderate success and great reviews of her books.

Attempts to contact Ms. Evans have gone unanswered, as have attempts to get a statement from Lex Hamilton, who is rumored to have had a romantic relationship with the young author.

I stare at the screen, my heart racing. Harley knew? She’s read my books? The thought is unfathomable and only leaves me utterly confused. My brain is still trying to make sense of things when the doorbell rings.

Instinct grips me and I know, without a doubt, it’s Lex.

Not in a million years did I expect him to come here because I’d concocted the scenario that he tipped off the reporters to dump me. However, after reading the article and learning that I apparently was not leading a secret, nefarious life, I’m not sure what to believe anymore.

But I’m terrified to face him. I consider ignoring it, but then he knocks with growing insistence. “Posey!” he shouts, his voice both annoyed and weary. “Let me in!”

I close my eyes, leaning against the table for support. Emotions rush me—anger, sadness, love—and I’m unsure how to handle any of it. I take a moment to breathe, to steady myself before I finally walk to the door and pull it open.

And there he is, looking bedraggled and worn but still so very handsome, with a duffel bag in one hand. His hair is tousled, and his eyes are shadowed with exhaustion.

“Lex,” I whisper, as I step aside to let him in. “What are you doing here?”

He looks irritated as he drops his bag to my floor. “Apparently chasing you halfway around the world because you ran and I can’t understand why,” he grumbles, shoving a hand through his hair. “I took the first flight I could get and economy was the only option available, and yes, while I’m used to flying first class, I’m not above sitting in coach if that’s all there is. The only problem was I had to sit on the tarmac for five fucking hours because of mechanical difficulties, crammed in between a man who kept sleeping on my shoulder and a baby who wouldn’t stop crying. I went through all that, missing post-race celebrations I assumed the girl I’m crazy about would be at my side for, that she would’ve been cheering me on during the race, only to find out she abandoned me. I’ve barely slept in the last twenty-seven hours and I’m cranky.”

I wince—he’s not irritated, he’s really mad. “I thought you were the one who tipped off the reporters,” I whisper dismally, understanding fully that he was not. “I thought you wanted to break up.”

“What in the ever-loving hell is wrong with you?” he snaps, rubbing at his tired eyes. “When have I ever given you any indication I wanted anything other than a serious relationship?”

A wave of guilt washes over me as I see the hurt in his eyes. “I thought you didn’t want me,” I admit, my voice shaking. “You were so distant the morning of the race, and I—”

“Distant?” he interrupts, stepping closer. “I was trying to focus! It’s not just a game for me, Posey. This is my career, my life. I can’t afford to be thinking about you because it distracts me too much and I don’t want to go out there and kill myself.”

“Oh,” I say quietly, the impact of those words hitting me hard. I could distract him to the point of danger, and I’m horrible for it, but that actually makes me feel better.

“It’s not fair not to give me the benefit of the doubt,” he says, his voice softening. “You can’t run away every time something bad happens. It’s going to be tough having this long-distance relationship, but you have to trust me. Now, I’m going to be gracious and say I could see how you might think those things, but what I still can’t understand is why you’d run rather than asking me to my face if I wanted to break up. It makes me think you don’t know me at all.”

“I was obviously wrong and I’m sorry,” I say, wondering if I’ve ruined everything.

He shakes his head wearily. “It was Ronan. He tipped them off.”

I stop short, stunned by the revelation. “Ronan? But why? How did he even know?”

“Because he’s an asshole,” Lex replies, the frustration evident in his tone. “And I’m an idiot for trusting him with the secret. I thought he was my friend but clearly I was wrong.”

“I’m really sorry he did that to you, Lex. It sucks when a friend isn’t who you thought they were.”

“Guess that’s how you felt when you thought I was trying to break up with you by ratting you out to reporters,” he says, a wry smile on his lips, but I can’t tell if that’s amusement or bitterness. He reaches into his pocket, pulling out the diamond bracelet. He takes my wrist and clasps it in place. “I love you, Posey. I don’t want you to run away. I want to figure this out together. I want you in my life, in my world, but it’s going to take work from both of us.”

My head swims, my vision blinking, and I grip his hands tight so I don’t keel over. “You… you love me?”

“Yeah,” he says softly, pulling me in and wrapping his strong arms around me. He kisses me on the head. “I do, which is why I was so mad. I thought you felt the same.”

I jerk hard, appalled he has doubts, and lean back to look him in the eye. “It’s why I ran, Lex. I love you too and it was too painful to think you didn’t feel the same. Your world is so out of my depth and it’s overwhelming and scary, and well… I freaked out. I won’t do that again, I promise.”

This time, his smile relieved but filled with tenderness. “It’s okay to be overwhelmed by it. I know this life isn’t what you ever thought you’d have, but I promise that I am going to be by your side and I won’t let you feel afraid again. I need you to trust me.”

And I realize, I didn’t know it before, but I sure as hell feel it in my bones now. “I do. I trust you.”

Lex bends closer and brushes his lips against mine. “Then shall we start over?”

I nod, kissing him back. “I’d like that.”

“Think I can bother you for a shower and some food?”

I jolt, remembering how tired he is and how hard the trip must have been on him. “Of course.” I pull away, point down the hall. “Bathroom’s down that way. I’ll make you some breakfast and—”

Lex jerks me to him, kissing me harder. I’m breathless when he nuzzles into my neck. “Let me clarify. You’re going to take a shower with me and then we can eat.”

“Oh, but I—” His mouth is on me again and then he lifts me into his arms. I know there’s no sense arguing with him, so I wrap my arms around my race car driver’s neck and deepen the kiss.

The implications of what just happened to me are not lost.

I just got my happily ever after.

Titans Racing is bringing a familiar face to their new team. Nash Sinclair left formula racing after a deadly crash but when he’s approached to fill an empty seat in one of their cars, he decides it’s time to reclaim the career he once loved. And his job isn’t the only second chance he gets when he realizes his ex-fiancée has joined the Titans’ team as their race strategy engineer. CLICK HERE to get all the details on Formula Chance, book two of the Race Fever series.