Chapter 40

Kai

"W hat if we lose the case?"

"Jessie," Levi grunted.

"What?" Jessie turned to look at him, holding a slice of pizza he had yet to take a bite from.

"We can't think like that."

"But it is a possibility—"

"Jess." It was Andrei who joined in, face serious. "Don't even think about that, okay? Diesel is innocent, and the truth always comes out in the end."

Jessie stared back at Andrei and then at his pizza. Hopefully, they were done.

"The truth didn't come out in your case," he murmured before taking a bite, causing Andrei and Levi to groan his name in union.

"Guys, why don't we all calm down?" I said, placing another box of pepperoni pizza between them, then sat next to Andrei on the floor. I might not know the right thing to say, but I did know pizza made everything slightly better.

"So, Jessie, how's your illustration business going?" I tried changing the subject. Recently, Jessie had started doing art commissions online.

"I got my first job done last week, and now I'm starting a new one." He didn't sound as excited as usual, so I tried my luck with Levi.

"What about you? Getting ready for college?"

"I had to postpone it a year because of… you know, Diesel being on trial for murder?" he answered flatly before reaching for a new slice.

Well, shit, I truly sucked at small talk.

"What's going on between Chief and Diesel's lawyer?" Jessie asked out of the fucking blue, his question catching me off guard.

The room turned slightly hotter, and if it weren't for how all three suddenly looked at me with curiosity, I would have tried avoiding the question.

"What do you mean?" I played dumb.

"They know each other from before, right?" Andrei said, his full attention on me.

Now they're in chatting mode?

"I think they dated," Levi added.

How the fuck did he know that?

"How do you know?" Andrei asked what I was thinking.

"I heard Chief saying something about it to his mom over the phone—"

"Okay, okay." I raised two hands in the air. "How about we stop this gossiping session?" I faked a smile. "What happened between Ash and that asshole is between them. Most importantly, it's in the past. The far, far past." I paused before narrowing my eyes at Jessie. "Wait, why did you ask?"

"I dunno," he mumbled, mouth full of pizza. "But he's handsome."

My nose scrunched up. "No, he isn't."

Andrei snorted.

"Why are you laughing?" I grunted.

"'Cause he's gorgeous. Miles and I talked about it the other day," he said, licking the sauce from his fingers. "We both said, hypothetically, of course, that we'd totally fuck him."

What the fuck?

Knowing he was my last hope, I turned to Levi. The second our eyes met, he quickly took a big bite, and I gaped at him.

"Un-fucking-believable. You too?"

Levi shook his head, his ears already turning red. Apparently, I was surrounded by traitors. More importantly, how could anyone find Soren attractive?

"That man is probably filled with Botox—"

"What's up, guys?" Ash's voice surprised me, and midsentence, I turned to look at him. He was standing at the entrance to the living room, looking as tired as ever.

"H-Hey, Ashy." I smiled at him, hoping he hadn't heard our conversation while also ignoring the kids' chuckles. At least they were laughing for a change.

"I see you had pizza for dinner?"

"Bought some on my way here." I jumped to my feet. "I also got one with green peppers just for you." It'd been his favorite for years.

"I already ate," he said quietly while running his fingers through his hair. He then looked at the guys. "If you don't mind, I think I'll head to bed. I'm beat."

"Sure," Andrei hummed, while Jessie squealed good night.

Once Ash left us alone, I turned to face them again. "You bunch of freeloaders are going to clean up in here," I ordered while looking around the mess of empty soda cans, used paper plates, and pizza boxes. I glanced back at where Ash had stood only a moment ago and sighed. He was doing really badly lately, and I was seriously beginning to worry. The only time I remembered him being this down was after he and Soren broke up, and the fear of Ash going through that again scared the shit out of me.

Speaking of which… Why had he returned home so late? I checked my watch. It was definitely way past the time he usually got back. My jaw tensed, and my brows pulled into a frown because I bet that son of a bitch Soren had a hand in it.

Ash

With my eyes closed, I tilted my head back and allowed the hot water to wash down my body. The pressure of the stream gave me a sliver of relief that was soon forgotten the second my brain forced me to reflect back on the day. Hours of testimonies trying to prove that Diesel was a monster when he wasn't. Him sitting in the middle of the courtroom with his hands cuffed like some animal, more bruises added to his handsome face each passing day. The jurors' expressions while the prosecutor tried to convince them with false narratives and, later on, their images in Soren's office.

Soren .

My stomach turned as goose bumps covered my body at the mere thought of him. Now cold, I turned up the heat until the water nearly burned my skin, but not even that was enough to take my mind off him. He had been so kind ever since he returned, reminding me of the past. It was brutal how easy it was to remember the good days and forget the bad. And while my breath still caught whenever the smell of his cologne hit me, and my eyes still attempted to steal quick glances at him, my heart didn't forget. Our history was like a lump in my throat. One ugly, messy lump made of all the tears I shed over him that still choked me whenever he smiled my way.

The hardest part about his return was stopping myself from asking all the questions I'd held on to for years. Soren always had an answer up his sleeve, as he proved in court daily. And yet, to the biggest question of all, he never provided me with an answer. And although the suspicion had been gnawing at my flesh for years, I had to restrain myself from opening that Pandora's box. Soren was here to do his job, and that was it. There was no place for the past when the present sucked every bit of energy I had.

Yet, in this chaos, small moments like coming home to find Kai with the kids gave me a bit of comfort. Knowing he was here to help me, despite what I was forcing him to go through, gave me the comfort I so miserably needed.

Strong arms wrapped themselves around me, and I leaned my head back against Kai's hot body as he softly caressed my skin.

"I didn't notice when you came in," I whispered while he brushed my wet hair back and kissed my neck.

I moaned at the soft touch, relieved to feel him behind me.

"That's okay," he chuckled, then bit the shell of my ear. "I missed you," he added, his hands already sliding down my body until he reached the base of my cock.

"But I didn't go anywhere." I choked on a breath as he traced his fingers along my pubes.

"It doesn't matter," he rasped. Cupping my jaw, he turned my face to take my lips in a heated kiss while moving his hand along my growing erection.

Kai thrust his tongue into my mouth, and I sucked on it, moaning around him. It had been a while since we'd last had sex, and my body was already begging to be touched. To be owned. Knowing what I needed after years of sleeping together, Kai broke the kiss only to plant smaller ones along my neck and collarbone. With one hand still stroking my cock, he used the other to play with my nipples.

With the water still running, he brushed his fingers over my light chest hair, letting me know how much he loved it. He flicked his thumb over my hard nipple, massaging it until I shivered underneath his touch. Only after I asked for more in a weak voice did he move to the other. And as he continued to edge me, using his talented hands, I felt his erection rubbing in the crease of my ass.

"K-Kai," I gasped his name, water getting into my mouth while I pushed back, rubbing my ass with his big cock.

"I love it when you're needy." He grabbed my hair and jerked my head back in a sharp move before kissing me again. This time, he devoured my mouth until the lack of air burned in my lungs. Once he let go, we were both heaving, but that didn't stop him from moving his hand to my ass and spreading my cheeks apart.

"You're so hot, babe," he rasped in my ear as I heard the squeeze of a bottle. The next moment, his slicked fingers grazed my hole, and I hissed at the familiar pressure when he pushed them in. I always made sure to keep a bottle of lube in the shower for times like this. Kai poured more of the liquid over my crease before pushing in another one of his thick fingers. Now, with three fingers in, Kai shoved me forward until my head was pressed against the shower wall.

Using my hands for support, I arched my back and rocked harder against him, wishing for more.

"Wear a condom and fuck me already," I panted.

"Why?" He twisted his fingers inside my stretched hole, hitting the spot that made my eyes roll to the back of my head. "Look how much you enjoy my fingers."

My face heated up, and I savored the feeling of humiliation. I adored it . "P-Please," I begged, my body burning with need until my muscles shivered. "I-I need more."

A low cry erupted from me after Kai removed his fingers and stepped out of the shower. I immediately regretted asking him to put on a rubber because that meant he had to let go of me. But we had to use one. We weren't exclusive with each other, and Kai fucked other people sometimes. I didn't care as long as he was careful. Or at least, that's what I loved telling myself—

"Hands on the wall." His order brought my attention back, and I immediately complied, placing my palms flat on the slippery surface. He then kicked my legs further apart before aligning the crown of his cock with my ready hole. With his hands holding on to my waist, he thrust forward, my body moving with his, and pushed in with one go.

It hurt, and I loved it.

"Fuck, babe, I'll never get used to how tight you are," he hissed, his dick sinking all the way in, filling me to the brim. "No matter how many times I use this little hole of yours, it's still tight like a virgin's ass." He spanked me, and I cried with the blistering ache. He then began moving, drilling in and out of me until I couldn't keep my moans down. My room was separated from the other rooms in the house and blocked noises pretty well, so knowing no one could hear us, I wasn't shy about using my voice.

Kai rocked his hips, his heavy balls smacking against my flesh with each pound. Biting my lip, I arched my back deeper, feeling satisfaction when he complimented me on how sexy I looked. Now ready to come, I took my pulsing dick in hand and began stroking it. With my fist tight around my length, I rubbed it to the rhythm of his thrusts until I felt my climax building in the pit of my stomach.

"I-I'm close," I cried, my balls tight and my muscles tensed.

"Shit, me too," Kai hissed from behind me right before he pulled almost all the way out, only to slam back in with full force. That was the last push, sending me over the edge, and my climax hit me at once. Waves of pleasure ran through me as I shot jolts of cum over the shower wall, every bit of me shuddering with the intensity of my release. The moment I was done, Kai pulled out, turned me around, and forced me to my knees.

"Open up, buttercup," he rasped, a half smirk pulled on his full lips.

Obsessed with his face, I parted my lips and stuck out my tongue while watching him get the condom off.

He grabbed the root of his dick and then brought the tip to my lips before he began stroking himself. He moved his hand slowly from the base to the tip, almost like he was holding back from coming. Drops of precum already salted the tip of my tongue, making my mouth water. It was in these moments when he stood above me that the world stopped existing, and my only purpose was to pleasure him. Long minutes of complete pleasure that helped me forget who I was.

Too eager to wait, I took him into my mouth and moaned around his shaft. A few more thrusts and his cock began spilling its load inside my mouth, hot cum landing over my tongue.

"That's it, Ashy." He cupped my cheeks after pulling out, my mouth still filled with his cum. "Drink up."

I did as I was told, not letting a drop go to waste.

Once done, he let go of me, and I licked my lips clean while rubbing my neck. My throat felt sore, but I'd make myself something warm to soothe it later.

"You're cool?" Kai asked after I rose back to my feet.

"Yeah," I said in a hoarse voice.

"Good." He kissed my forehead. "You're so hot, Ashy," he said and was ready to get out of the shower when I grabbed his wrist.

"You're staying over, right?"

Kai seemed surprised at first; his brows raised all the way up before his shock melted into a warm smile.

"Of course."

I usually made a clear separation between our sex life and friendship. After fucking for years, the lines sometimes blurred, and I tried avoiding it as much as possible. It wasn't that I was a cold man. Quite the opposite—I yearned for love, yet in the same breath, I'd learned to fear it. In the two times I'd loved, my heart got broken. The pain nearly killed me, and I had no plans to ever experience it again. Especially when Kai was the first man to break me. And yet, despite our past, we couldn't help but get closer over the years. Since it was unavoidable, I came up with ways to ensure I wouldn't get hurt again. If it were avoiding defining our relationship, allowing him to sleep with others, or not letting him take care of me after sex, somehow, we made it work. And despite all of that, the last thing I wanted tonight was to be left alone.