Chapter Thirty-Four

Charlotte

Weirdly, sitting in a jail cell wasn’t the worst thing that had ever happened to me.

For the past couple of hours, I’d been in a small cell, mostly staring at brick walls, and yet, it was the most at peace I’d been in a long time. I felt good , actually.

All my life, I’d done the right thing. I’d never caused any trouble in school, had good grades, never was out past my curfew, all that stuff. While Tamara tested boundaries, I never did. I went to work as soon as I was able to and created a savings account when I was sixteen. I did my taxes early and always returned the shopping cart to the corral.

The only time I’d ever done anything remotely against the grain was when it had to do with Jesse. Dating him secretly, sleeping with him as a one-time-thing in Oklahoma, kissing him twice while technically having a boyfriend. Now, I was sitting in a jail cell, something Tamara had never done, because I punched a girl in the face after she defended her brother for almost killing Jesse.

What was weird was that I didn’t feel despair or shame. I wasn’t upset with myself. I didn’t blame Jesse or lament that maybe life would have been better, that I would be a better person had I not encountered him. No, I was happy . I was more content with myself than I’d ever been. Because the bottom line was, Jesse hadn’t made me do anything. I’d chosen to do those things. I’d chosen to punch Trish in the face. Me.

And I’d do it again if I had the chance.

Who was I? Who was I becoming?

I wasn’t sure. But I did know that whoever it was, I wasn’t going to fight the transformation. I was looking forward to it.

In the hours I’d spent in that jail cell, I’d made a few decisions about how I was going to live my life. The solitude and time to think provided me with an opportunity. There was a version of me that had gone into this jail, and there was going to be a version of me that was going to come out of it. There was no going back.

The main door opened, and I looked up through the cell bars to see light pouring in.

“Are you decent?”

It wasn’t one of the Andersons, but it was a voice I recognized. All I could see was the arm, holding the main door open, waiting for my response.

“Yes,” I said.

Suddenly, the owner of that arm came into view. Logan Galloway walked in, flanked by one of the rookie deputies, who was fumbling with his keys. Logan found me, clenched his jaw and nodded, and then guided the deputy over.

“Here we go,” Logan said. “I’m here to get you out, Charlotte.”

“Thanks, Logan,” I said.

“Tamara is in the office, signing paperwork,” Logan said. “Did you have anything that they took from you?”

“My phone,” I said. “I don’t think I was wearing any jewelry or anything.”

The cell door opened, and I stood. Part of me was kind of sad to leave. So much had changed inside me while sitting there that I felt a special kind of connection to it. Besides, I was pretty sure Jesse had spent time in that cell at some point too. Just by virtue of there only being six of them if nothing else.

Among the various things I’d decided about how I was going to live my life going forward was the acknowledgement that I wasn’t going to hold back how I felt about people anymore. Namely Jesse. Which meant I was going to be as honest as I could be without being cruel. Tamara had already indicated she was fine with me and Jesse, but I needed to make sure, just for my own heart. She needed to know I was serious. I needed to know there would be no harsh feelings.

“Hey, you,” Tamara said as we made our way back into the intake area.

“Hey, I am going to marry Jesse,” I said, all as one thought.

“Uhh, what?”

I closed my eyes and shook my head. That wasn’t how that was supposed to come out.

“I mean, I made a decision,” I said. “I’m going to make a real go of this thing with Jesse. Like, serious serious. I need to know you are okay with that.”

She looked confused and taken aback, probably more for my forward attitude than what I was actually saying. I was usually so much more timid.

“Yeah, I’m fine,” she said. “Like, for real. I got over my Jesse crush a long time ago. Knock yourself out.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yes,” she said, emphatically. “Jesse isn’t my target anymore.”

“Collin?” I laughed.

Her eyes flickered, and her face went very red. Suddenly, she became extremely interested in the paper she was signing. Slowly, I turned and saw Logan, hands in his pockets and staring out of the window, as if he had gone on standby, his brain powering down temporarily like a laptop. I turned back to my sister, who was handing the paper back to the deputy.

“ Logan ?”

“So, let’s get you out of here,” she said chipperly, clearly blowing by my observation.

“Wow,” I said. “I mean, I knew you had a thing for all the Galloway boys, but Captain Muscles?”

“Shut up, sis,” she said, mostly under her breath.

“Logan? Really? He has the personality of a steel beam!”

“Shut up, Charlotte,” she said, her voice going high in a sing-songy way. “And you don’t know him. He’s actually very interesting.”

“And you do?”

“I mean… I’ve been around a lot recently. We’ve… talked. About stuff.”

“Like what?”

“Things. Weather. Fire.”

“Uh huh.”

“He’s stupid hot , okay, Charlotte? Sometimes that’s enough.”

I raised my hands in surrender and laughed.

“All right, all right,” I said. “Enjoy the new crush.”

“Not new. Just newly the focus,” she muttered. “All right, Logan, we’re ready!”

The pitch of her voice shifted so dramatically when she spoke to him, I almost burst out laughing.

“Cool,” he said, powering back on and returning to human form. I was convinced I’d see a panel where his circuit board was if I looked hard enough. “Do you need to go by your house, or do you want to go straight to the hospital?”

“Me?” I asked.

He nodded.

“Actually, there is somewhere I’d like to go,” I said.

“Can we all just ride together?” Tamara asked. “I had Mom drop me off.”

“Sure,” Logan said.

“I call front seat!”

“It’s a truck,” Logan said. “All the seats are front seats.”

“Oh. Well, I call middle!”

Logan glanced at me, and I shrugged.

We made our way to his truck, which was surprisingly old, and hopped inside. Rolling the windows down all the way to fight the oppressive heat, he cranked the car on and backed up. Jesse’s voice came out of the speaker, and I smiled.

“Sorry,” he said, turning it down. “I like to crank it when I’m alone in the car.”

“Was that Jesse?” Tamara asked.

“Yeah, it’s a bootleg he made me. They don’t have a record yet, but he recorded me all their studio stuff they have so far.”

“Sounds great,” I said.

“Yeah, it does,” Logan said. “He should keep pursuing it.”

It was a test. I could feel it. Logan was testing me to see how supportive I would be of his brother. It was cute.

“He should,” I said. “He could be a big star one day.”

“So where do you want to go?” he asked, nodding as if I’d passed his impromptu hurdle.

“Madie’s,” I said. “The sandwich shop up the block.”

“I don’t think I’ve been there in years,” Logan said. “Not since the old lady died. I thought they shut down.”

“They did,” Tamara said. “But her daughter opened it back up.”

“Still make the same sandwiches?” I asked.

“Pickle and all,” Tamara said.

“Good.”

When we arrived, I went inside and felt a wave of nostalgia wash over me. Tamara and I used to go to the shop when it was the original at least once a week as kids. The pickle on the side, which came with every order, was my favorite food item in the world. It was so silly. I had pickles all the time, but there was something so special about the ones I got from Madie’s.

I ordered a slate of sandwiches, enough for not only Jesse and me, but for the entire crew. It took them only ten or so minutes, and when they were done, I had to enlist Tamara to help me carry them all out to the truck.

After the second trip, we were all packed in, and Logan put the truck into drive.

“That’s a lot of sandwiches,” he said. “You just wanted to bring everyone lunch?”

“Yes,” I said. “But also, it means something to Jesse. It’s kind of a thing between the two of us.”

“Sandwiches?” Tamara said. “Now that’s the kind of love language a girl can get behind.”