Chapter 16

Three days had passed since Lucy had woken up in that divine bed. She felt different than before, more self-possessed, as though she had gained a better understanding of herself. However, danger still lurked outside, and she wasn't yet ready to leave the forge. She continued to help Ian and Rory in the distillery as well as doing chores around the house. She had improved her cooking and cleaning skills. There was a chance that she could make a good maid yet, she thought, chuckling to herself. Ian had changed as well. He was sweet to her, cooking meals for her as well as bringing back small trinkets from the market. Sometimes it was a small ornament, or other times he brought back an item of clothing she might like. She accepted these gifts with gratitude, but there was a sense of gnawing doom inside, for she knew that this was not going to last forever.

At some point, she was going to have to leave and thus say goodbye to Ian, and to all the joy she had discovered with him. With him, she had become a better version of herself, and she wasn't quite sure what form her life was going to take away from him, away from this place. When she ran away from the keep, she only had a vague idea of what would happen. Now, she wished that she could have stayed with Ian, but it was impossible. She could hardly remain in the forge her entire life, only briefly enjoying the feeling of fresh air upon her skin. That was no way to live at all. Even if years passed, it would only take one glimpse from an inquisitive soul, or even a passing look from her father on one of his routine trips through the village, for the truth to be uncovered. The longer this went on, the more she would have to lose, and she thought that perhaps it was better to leave before too many emotions had been committed.

Yet to walk away from that bed, those arms, that man… it would take all the courage she possessed and afterwards, she would cry an ocean because of it. She didn't believe that she would ever meet anyone who would make her feel as Ian had, nor did she want to believe it. Perhaps he was right in thinking that the world was a cruel thing, and they all should devote themselves to money. It may have been naive of her, but she didn't want to do this.

It was bittersweet when Rory returned to the forge excitedly one day, revealing that the guards had taken the bait and were moving north, hunting for this mysterious cloaked figure that had been rumored to have been seen. "If ye leave taewards another direction, ye should escape their attention," he added, smiling. Lucy returned the gesture, although she feigned it, for it meant that she would have to leave them. She glanced towards Ian, whose expression was impassive.

"I think perhaps it's better if I remain cautious for a wee bit longer. I want tae make sure there is as much distance between the guards and me as possible. They might still be patrolling the village now," she said, wearing a placid smile. Rory nodded, and Lucy breathed a sigh of relief.

With Rory around, Lucy and Ian tried to control themselves so that he wouldn't suspect anything was amiss. It just seemed right to keep it secret from him. Whenever he went out, Lucy and Ian rushed to each other as though they were linked by an invisible force. They were compelled to be with each other, and when they kissed, she knew it was going to be practically impossible to tear herself away from him. The rushing emotions only became more intense, more profound. Their lovemaking never became routine, and all she wanted was to linger in his arms, wishing that they could push the rest of the world away and begin life anew, free from the torments of the past.

While Ian displayed his affection in a different way than before, there was a part of him that became closed off. After they made love, he usually remained silent, or at least pensive, keeping a part of his heart sealed to her. It made her realize that things were going to change. He had already resolved himself to it, and was perhaps already nursing his wounds, preparing for a great rent in his heart to open.

She had no idea how to prepare for it.

An unspoken tension arose between them. She was afraid of broaching the subject because she feared that there was only one way it could end; with him telling her to leave. If she was going to leave eventually, then she might as well leave now. It would be easier for the both of them in the long run. She didn't dare threaten him with that, because what could he say in reply? They all knew that it was impossible for her to stay, so why even bring up the subject? She would rather linger in this imperfect moment, stretching it out for as long as possible, as though she was riding a river that would never end. She deluded herself into thinking that if she did nothing, then she could stay forever, but, of course, everything changed.

While she was going about her chores, Ian was always busy in the forge. She could hear him hammering away, and although she wasn't sure, she could have sworn that there was a different tone to the sound. It seemed darker, more hostile, and she wondered if Ian was taking out his rage upon the world, wishing that he could hammer fate into the shape he desired just as easily as if it was metal. To her dismay, she also heard angry shouts between him and Rory, although she could not make out the details for the arguments were always far from her ears. When she asked Ian what they were arguing about, he just looked at her blankly, and said that it was none of her concern.

* * *

Lucy hated being frozenout of matters. Perhaps Ian didn't see her as being invested in the future of the forge because she was going to leave soon enough, but she was. She wanted to know that he and Rory were going to be well after she left, but still Ian was being tight-lipped with her. She knew that if she was going to learn what they were arguing about, she had to go with Rory.

One day, while Ian was working, Lucy approached Rory and asked him if he would take her for a walk again, for she was eager to taste some fresh air. Rory seemed relieved that she asked, and Lucy assumed that he wanted to get out of the shop as well. They ventured towards the forested area they had strolled through before. It was still just as beautiful, with the verdant leaves waving at her as she passed, and the birds hopping from branch to branch, chirping to each other. She gazed at the old, gnarled faces in the trees and wished that they could have offered her some wisdom, perhaps giving her advice about how to live two lives, how to cope with being pulled in two directions. They remained silent, though. The wind whispered, but kept its secrets to itself.

"The village is looking really lovely. There are ribbons stretched from house tae house as they prepare for the fair," Rory said. Lucy pursed her lips and sighed a little.

"I wish I could see it for myself. I always enjoyed the fair, especially when I was younger. I love the puppet shows. When I was a bairn, I truly thought it was real," she chuckled at her younger self.

"I like the food myself. People always put more effort in when there's a fair."

"Aye, that's true. It's a shame I am gaeing tae hae tae miss it this year."

"Perhaps we could disguise ye again. There will be plenty of people in the crowd. Ye could lose yerself among them."

"I fear that it would be tae much of a risk," Lucy replied. A moment of silence lingered between them. Lucy studied him for a while. "I hae noticed that things hae been a wee bit tense between ye and Ian. What hae ye been arguing about?"

Rory looked away, a troubled expression on his face. "Naething… everything. Ye should nae concern yerself with it," he said, trying to sweep away her concerns. He began talking about the fair again, but Lucy wasn't willing to let him wriggle away so easily.

"But I am concerned, Rory. I dinnae like knowing ye are at odds with each other. I'm aware of how things hae changed since the shop was intruded. I want ye tae know that ye can tell me anything. Ye are my friend," Lucy said. Indeed, she felt of him as a brother as she had never had one of those before, although she did not say this as she knew he already had a sister.

Rory nodded slowly, dragging his hand across his chin. They reached a log and stepped over it. A rabbit hopped away, disturbed by their presence. There was a quick rustling of trees and a glimpse of a white bobtail, and then nothing.

"I think he hae been shaken by it," Rory said. "He's been tense, and he hae nae been able tae concentrate. I wish he would just realise that he dinnae need tae rely on the distillery. He seems tae hae something else on his mind, but maybe I hae been the same. I hae been thinking about things since I returned."

"What things hae ye been thinking about?"

"Just how far my sister hae come from the life we used tae live. I would like tae dae the same, yet I find myself entangled in Ian's scheme." He waved his hand through the air and then raised it to his forehead, bowing his head slightly. "She asked me how things were here, and I dinnae hae the heart tae tell her that I was involved in the distillery. I dinnae want tae see the disappointment on her face. I cannae gae on like this, Lucy, but I dinnae know how tae tell Ian."

"I think ye should trust him with the truth. I think he will listen. He cares about ye, Rory, even if he is sometimes gruff," she replied. Rory chuckled at the description. "Some people in this world only want what they think is best for ye, like my Da. I tried tae tell him what I wanted, but he would nae listen. He only ever lectured me about what he thought was right, which is why I ended up running away from him. I dinnae think Ian is like that. If ye tell him that ye are struggling, then he will nae hold ye back. Sadly, I think he hae gotten used tae letting people gae," there was a melancholy tone to her voice when she said this. She was filled with an image of Ian sitting by his forge alone, shrouded in darkness and silence, without anyone to offer him a glimpse of brightness. It was a sobering thought and she hated to abandon him like this because he wasn't the type to seek out salvation. But what would happen to him in her absence? It was strange to think, but he would probably miss her more than her own father missed her.

And she would miss him too. They had quickly become dependent on each other, but as each day passed, Lucy could feel herself being pulled more insistently away from him. Rory continued speaking, but Lucy barely paid attention, so consumed was she by thoughts of Ian.