34. No Perfect Time

NO PERFECT TIME

Coming home,back to the humidity and looming reality of what we have to do, is daunting.

At least Lincoln isn't pushing for us to go over to my parents' house and tell them right now. It has to be the perfect moment to break news like this… I just have no clue what that moment looks like.

Maybe when we're over for dinner one day we just stand up and announce that we got impulsively married in Vegas and they need to learn to deal with it if they want us in their lives. It makes me feel guilty.

I suppose it's not newfound guilt. I feel like I owe my parents everything, not that they ever act like I do. They constantly give and give and I feel like all I do is take, and this will be just another moment where they have to deal with me being a disappointment of a daughter.

I'm quiet as Lincoln opens his apartment door and we head inside. He parks our luggage in the foyer and empties his keys as I go and sit at a stool under the island.

"Would you…"

"What?" he asks.

I go to open my mouth to speak, and my phone vibrates on the counter. I furrow my brow when I see my dad's name, but pick it up.

"Hey Dad."

"Oh thank God," he says on a sob.

"What's wrong?"

"Your mom is in the hospital."

I stand up off the stool and pace. "What happened? Is she okay?"

"They think she had a mild heart attack. They don't know if she'll need surgery or what the next step is. Could you grab some things from the house and bring them to the hospital?"

"Of course, is she okay? Is she awake?"

"Yes," my dad sniffles. "I'm sorry to scare you by calling you like that. She's alert, in some pain, but she's getting the care she needs."

"Okay, text me everything you need. Lincoln and I will be right there."

I hang up the phone, and Lincoln's arms are wrapped around me in an instant. My heart is racing and as much as I hate myself for thinking it, it somehow feels like this is my fault. How did I not keep better tabs on her cholesterol? I've been so lost in what's going on with me, I haven't even asked about her health.

"Hey," Lincoln says, forcing my eyes to meet his. "We're going to get into the car, drive to your parents' place and get what they need, and then we're both going to the hospital to see your mom."

I nod and try to even my breathing.

"She's going to be fine. I'll call my mom as soon as we get to the hospital and find out what's going on."

I handmy mom her iPad as soon as we get to the hospital room and she automatically pulls up one of her online card games.

"Thank God. I was getting so bored I thought I was going to die."

"Jesus Christ, Holly," my dad grates out from his visitor's chair.

"Oh calm down. I swear he didn't even listen to the doctor. He said I need to work on maintaining a lower blood pressure and work on lowering my cholesterol. Avoiding stress, eating better, and adjusting to my new medication. It was minor, Tim," my mother tells my father like he's being dramatic.

My dad rubs the bridge of his nose and glances up at me.

"Mom, this is still really serious."

"Serious as a heart attack," she whispers under her breath as she plays solitaire. "You know, you all not talking about it would be really great for my blood pressure."

I glance over at Lincoln and he just shakes his head at my mother's antics.

"Should I call my mom?" he asks her and my mother huffs.

"Yeah, so I have another person in this room giving me grief? No thanks."

"Mom," I scold her.

"Fine, call Maggie. But I swear, if you make it out to be a bigger deal than it is, I'll throw a fit."

Lincoln gives her a salute and leaves the room to call his mother.

"Now, how was Vegas?" my mother says with a smile.

A part of me wants to blurt everything out and tell her how truly amazing the trip was because I came back a married woman. But now is far from the time to tell her that. I can picture it now, telling her I married Lincoln and her heart monitor flaring up as I give my mother a real fucking heart attack.

I rub my forehead, knowing it's going to take some time and planning on when to tell them and not fear I might send her into cardiac arrest.

"I loved it. I haven't had a chance to speak with Krystal yet, but I think I've got the job."

"As you should, she'd be an idiot not to hire you," she says and I shake my head. "What? You've been fantastic at planning events since you were a small child? You wouldn't even let me plan your birthday parties. You wanted to do it yourself so they would be perfect. I think you found your niche, Penny. I told you things were starting to look up."

My eyes well with tears and my mom tsks at me.

"None of that. Come, give me a hug."

I wrap my arms around her, avoiding all the cords attached to her.

"I'm so proud of you, sweetie," she whispers in my ear and I swear my heart sinks in my gut. I wonder if that's the last time she'll ever say that to me.

It's beenmultiple weeks of keeping our marriage a secret and everything seems to be getting in the way of us being fully out to our family. Meanwhile, everything in our little bubble is going fantastic. I left Kemper's and I'm now working for Krystal full time. I'm driving again. Lincoln helped me pick out a cute Volkswagen that I love. And our marriage is going better than I could have ever expected.

We're in complete newlywed bliss. We eat dinner together, sleep together, and wake up and do it all over again. I don't think there's a spot in this apartment where we haven't fucked, but I'm willing to make sure we haven't missed a spot.

My mother has been healing from her heart attack, milking every second of it. I can only imagine how much money she's spent online gambling, but she's truly doing better.

Tonight's the night.

We're going to walk into Lincoln's parents' house and tell them everything—well, minus the details of how this all started. There's no reason to traumatize our families to that extent.

I take a deep breath as Lincoln opens the door and when we do, there's groaning from our family and my heart stills, did they find out?

"It's not them," Maggie says. "Well, shut the front door before you ruin the surprise," she says and I look around at the balloons and the massive congratulation sign next to two wedding rings.

I furrow my brow and look at Lincoln.

"Get out of the way, they should be here any second now," Maggie says, moving us to the side as Aiden and Jessa walk through the door, and our family gives out rounds of congratulations.

I look over to Lincoln, who looks up at the ceiling for strength. I dust off this feeling of resentment as my best friend and cousin walk into the room beaming.

"Why didn't anyone tell us about the surprise?" Lincoln says in an irritated tone to his brother, Gavin.

"Probably because they didn't want Penny spilling the beans before it happened. Not everyone knows how good she is at keeping a secret." Gavin winks and walks away. Lincoln looks like he's considering throttling his younger brother as Aiden and Jessa approach us.

She holds out a hand, showcasing the ring, which I automatically recognize as Lincoln's grandmother's ring.

"Congratulations, Jessa," I say honestly, wrapping my arms around her in a serious hug.

"Thank you. I seriously had no clue," she gushes. Aiden's smile is wide as he looks down at his fiancé.

The smile that takes over my face is genuine. What's another week or two?

As soon asthe appropriate amount of time passes after Jessa and Aiden's engagement, we agree that we can't wait any longer.

We've gotten through Jessa's trial with her ex-boyfriend. My mom is doing well, and I honestly feel sick over the idea of hiding Lincoln for another moment.

Everything seems relatively normal as we head to my parents' backyard, where everyone else is waiting for us. My newly-sized ring is on my finger. It's gold with a large cushion cut diamond in the center. Lincoln went simple with a black band on his finger. It feels weird to actually wear it out, but I'm ready. We've got this.

I pull the sliding door back and my mother is on her feet, dragging a tall, brown-haired man in my direction.

"Oh, there you are. Penny, this is Oliver. He works in the legal department of?—"

Lincoln is still next to me, and it seems like everyone is facing in our direction.

"Mom," I say her name softly, trying to resolve this quickly and quietly.

"I know you said you weren't dating, but that was months ago. You have your new job with Krystal. You seem happy."

"Oliver, I'm so sorry," I tell him and my mother looks affronted.

Lincoln says nothing next to me, but I can feel the tension rolling off of him.

"Oliver, I think you should go," I tell him gently. He looks around uncomfortably and then back down at my mom.

"Come on honey, just give him a chance. He's not a loser like?—"

"Mom, Oliver needs to go because I'm not interested in dating anyone, because I'm… I'm married," I say, holding up my left hand and she gasps.

"Holy shit," Gavin whispers.

"Oh, fuck," Jessa adds in.

"What am I missing?" Maggie asks, looking at me.

Lincoln takes a step next to me and I take a deep breath. Lincoln has fought for us to be together since the very beginning. This is my time to prove that I'm all in. This is the moment where I prove that I was worth all the effort, that I love him as much as he loves me.

"I'm married. I'm sorry, Oliver, but if you could go," I tell him and he grumbles under his breath before leaving.

"You're married? I didn't even know you were dating. You had a wedding and didn't invite your family? Who is he, where is he?" my mother questions her tone nearly shrill and I wince, worrying about her blood pressure.

"Mom, if you could sit down," I ask.

She gapes at me, looking pissed as hell as she takes a step back and sits next to my dad.

None of them seem to be connecting the dots, minus the twins, Jessa, and, surprisingly, Aiden. I suppose I don't blame her for telling Aiden if she did. I know I tell Lincoln everything, it would only make sense that Jessa slipped up, I don't blame her. If anything it probably prepared him for this moment.

"We're married," Lincoln says, holding out his hand, clearly tired of the bullshit.

All four of our parents have similar expressions of shock. I try to not let it bother me, I knew there would be push back, that this wouldn't go over well, it's what I was so afraid of.

"Excuse me, you fucking what?" my mother asks and I swallow, my heart sinking with her disapproval.

"Lincoln and I are married. We got married while we were in Vegas," I blurt out.

"That was nearly two months ago," my aunt Maggie says in a soft voice, clearly trying to process it all. I don't fault any of them, I get it, I really do. But haven't they seen the change in both of us? They had to know something was going on in each of our lives.

"How long?" my dad asks, crossing his arms over his chest.

"How long what?" I ask as he leans forward, resting his elbows on his knees.

"How long has this been a thing?" He waves his hand between us, clearly in disapproval.

"Since the beginning of summer."

"It's nearly Christmas," Maggie gasps, clutching her chest.

"You took advantage of her," my mother says, pointing at Lincoln. "She was going through a hard time finding out about her biological mother and you manipulated her."

I stand in front of Lincoln, feeling pissed and possessive.

"You will not talk to him like that," I say sternly to my mother. "He was there for me when no one else knew. He's the reason I'm so happy. He's the whole reason I'm doing okay right now. You will never ever speak to him like that again," I say, hating the downtrodden look on her face, but I just couldn't let her speak to him like that.

I look over at my aunt Maggie, who seems pleased with me standing up for her son.

Lincoln grips my hip, and I watch as everyone collectively follows the motion. My heart sinks as I look at my mother's disappointment, but Lincoln's touch grounds me.