Chapter Two

Saylor

Ci: Heading out. Oaklynn can fill you in tonight. Love you.

I stare at his text, and let my fingers run over the typed out message. Another job...in a different state. A thrill spirals in my stomach for him, knowing the guys are on their way to save lives. I know each mission can be dangerous, but I also believe their training and intel is superior. They will be fine, and when they get back, my office will get a lot busier. Not that I’m complaining. After years of school and testing, I’m happy I can provide services for the people we serve. With my own experience, I know first-hand how important these first few hours are, and when people need to hear from me the most. Sometimes, people stay here in Minnesota, and other times they end up going to homes in other states. I keep tabs on everyone.

Me : Stay safe. I love you.

I type back before pocketing my phone. He won’t be able to contact me again for a few days. I often wonder how this phase of our life would continue to work. Will we never get a chance to see each other? Will there be resentment with time apart? Will I feel as if I’m helping Rogue, and not hindering it? I jumped right in after my high school graduation and never looked back. It didn’t even phase me to attend college and complete my degree and master’s program here as well. I know Oaklynn had dreams for me that were grander, the chance to party in Manhattan together, stay up all night at rock concerts before getting an hour of sleep, then rushing to class. That life worked for her. After everything I went through with my family, and being relocated here to Minnesota, I didn’t want to have a crazy, unpredictable life. I wanted stability, love, acceptance. And I found all that with my family here, and with Ci.

Ci. Poor guy flips anytime I tell him I’m not ready for wedding planning, or his latest idea…to look for a house. It’s not that I don’t want to take these steps, but I want Rogue to be strong before we do. I also have an idea, an image in my head, for what I want our house and dream wedding to look like. I only want to do this once, and I want it to be perfect. Which means expensive, which means I don’t want to be dipping into Rogue funds to pay for it. I know we can, as it’s how we live and get paid, but I feel guilty. With my license, I can contract out, and take on paying side jobs. At least, that’s what I’m hoping to do. I want to take this off of Ciaran so he can concentrate only on missions. Too bad he’s stubborn, and hasn’t backed off on the planning in weeks. Seriously , one would think I have commitment issues from the way he makes me sound lately.

“Hey!” Oaklynn calls suddenly, before opening my office door and walking in .

“Hey,” I respond cautiously, my brow quirking up. “What are you doing here?”

Her eyes roll, “Checking in obviously. I know you get anxious when the guys have to leave.”

“I get anxious?” I smirk in disbelief, “I think you have this reversed there.”

She sighs, “Fine. I get anxious! Are you happy?”

I chuckle at her, shaking my head. “There’s nothing wrong with being worried, or anxious. But they have to go.”

“I know,” Oaklynn drops into the chair in front of my desk. “I keep thinking I’ll get used to this feeling, but what if I don’t? Does that make me not Rogue material?”

“Stop,” I tell her, “you’re being ridiculous. The guys need your photos and intel. You and Reed are scary good at that.”

“Reed is scary good. I just aim and shoot where he tells me,” Oaklynn argues back, shrugging her shoulders. “And this time we had a little help from Ollie and Nash.”

I frown, “How did that go?”

“As you’d expect,” Oaklynn’s smile turns mischievous. “Ciaran got all caveman as usual. You’d think after how many years, and the giant rock he put on your finger, that he’d chill, but no .”

I grin, shaking my head, “It’s not that huge.”

“Whatever. Maybe if you’d marry the guy this year, then he’d calm down a bit,” She shrugs.

“Soon,” I promise her, just like I keep promising my fiancé.

“Well, anyway. What are you doing tonight, now that they are leaving?” She asks, before pocketing her cell phone.

“Girls night. Want to come over? My mom thinks something is going on with Mila. Apparently, evening mimosas and painting our toenails is supposed to help her want to talk about it,” I shrug and smile. My mom was flying around the house when we talked earlier, making snacks while yelling at my dad to remind him he can’t come home tonight. She’s been a little extra frantic lately, and absolutely convinced that Mila is hiding things from us, but I don’t see it. I’ve told Ci my mom’s concerns, and he doesn’t understand either. When I told my mom I don’t think she needs to worry, Mila has always been responsible, and she would talk to us if something was wrong, Mom wasn’t having it. A mother’s intuition is what she claimed.

“I’m always down for a girls’ night. That’s actually really sweet. I can’t remember my mom voluntarily doing something like that. Not on her own anyways. We always went to the spa,” Oaklynn shakes her head, her long blonde locks swaying back and forth. “What’s little Niko going to do?”

I smile at the mention of my younger brother. “He’s being shipped out for guys’ night with dad and Matt.”

Oaklynn cackles, “I can just picture Jason and Matt babysitting. Poor Niko is going to learn early about the life of a Rogue.”

“Speaking of Matt,” I turn to her, feeling all giddy, “Did Kai tell you the news yet?”

“No,” Oaklynn snorts. “If it has nothing to do with Rogue, food, drama, or the latest episode of Yellowstone, then no, he hasn’t told me anything.”

I laugh because it is so truly Kai, “Well, Ci told me that Matt and Erika are planning to adopt.”

“Yay!” Oaklynn claps her hands together. “Oh my gosh! That’s actually so perfect for them. How’s it going to work though?”

I shrug. “How they choose to live, and where, is their own thing. Personally, I think Matt would be willing to go anywhere. It’s Erika’s piece in Rogue that keeps her on the road so much. They’ve made strides to be together more, but I think she’s used to the independence, and Matt is just too stubborn to go to her all the time.”

“Do you think if someone took over the house it would make it easier for him to feel like he can leave?” Oak gives me a knowing look, and I think about chucking my pen at her.

“Not happening.”

“Fine. Just keep us all in suspense waiting to see what you’re going to do,” Oaklynn huffs, and I fight to bite back my smile. Between her, Ciaran, and my mom, I might flip out one of these days. Only my dad seems to understand where I’m coming from. Either that, or he just wants me to wait because then it puts the wedding off longer. From the minute we announced our engagement, he’s been having a tough time accepting it. Silas and I don’t get it, considering my dad has known Ciaran longer than me, but it’s cute, and touching, in a way. It took some time for us to get to a good place, but now that we are, I feel like my dad has been part of my life for years. We bonded the most when I also decided to take his last name.

Eventually, I convince Oaklynn to help me finish putting the welcome packets together before I can close up the office for the night. Everything is in order, and once we hear from the guys I’ll be able to start assembling the supplies. I’m so exhausted by the time we leave, that having a mimosa and relaxing sounds absolutely perfect. Maybe my mom does know what she’s talking about.

We make the drive to my parents’ house and park, right as my dad is buckling Niko into his car seat. “You’re just leaving?”

Dad’s eyes meet mine, “First, she wanted my help cutting up the melon, then she was off on a tangent about Niko making a mess of the cheese blocks. I figured it was a safe time to leave. I hope she gets some answers tonight.”

“You think something is going on with Mila too?” I ask.

He shakes his head, “I don’t. But I’ve not always been the best at reading my kids, or having that gut instinct that your mom does.”

I nod in understanding. I don’t have the parental instinct, and I secretly wonder if I ever will. I do know Mila though. We’ve always been close. And yes, has she been different lately, absolutely, but not in a bad way. After surviving being shot, and the surgeries that followed, she has been nothing but the embodiment of patience. She takes everything in stride, and continues to live her life as if she isn’t in a wheelchair. Now, she’s going to be transitioning to the next phase of her life, and I think that is the part my mom is struggling with, not that she’ll ever admit it. Mila wants to leave for college. She wants to have a campus experience, and has made all the accommodations for herself, because that’s who my baby sister is. A mature, young woman, who fears nothing anymore.

“Well, have fun tonight,” I wave to Niko who gives me a toothy grin from the backseat. Dad gives me a hug, and kisses the top of my head, before getting in the car and driving off.

Oaklynn and I get inside and start helping my mom. I pick at the food on the table and start on a mimosa. “Where is our guest of honor?”

“She was on a phone call,” Mom calls from the kitchen. “She didn’t say with whom, but it sounded like it was about her classes.”

“Mm,” I grab another bottle of champagne and crack it, knowing we’re going to need it. My mom is still bustling around, and she looks worried. A deep V etched across her forehead. When she walks by me to straighten the fruit platter one more time, I stop her and sling my arm around her waist, “It’s okay mom. Everything is perfect. Mila is okay, even if she has something she isn’t saying yet, I don’t think we need to worry.”

Mom sighs, her body deflating, “I know. You’re right. I’m just so worried, Say.”

“Don’t,” I tell her, giving her side a little nudge with my hip. “Now, which color should I paint my toes?” I pick up the various bottles and look at the names. That seems to do the trick, and my mom stays occupied talking colors with Oaklynn and me. Of course, they also take this time to bring up wedding colors…because why not. I roll my eyes at both of them.

“Mila!” I call down the hallway to her room, “Come save me!”

“You’re so dramatic,” Oaklynn laughs, and pours some more champagne into my glass.

“Tonight isn’t about me,” I remind them both, and they just continue to smile and talk about dress styles.

“Mila!”

I hear her chair as it glides across the floor, and I start to relax. Until I see her face. Mila’s eyes are wide, and her skin looks ashen.

“Oh my god, Mi,” I get up from my chair and face her, “What’s wrong.”

“It’s the mission,” she hands me an iPad. “I was keeping tabs. Then Reed sent this through.”

I take the iPad from her hands, my own hand shaking. I already know before looking, it’s not good. I can feel my heart wanting to rip out of my chest, and my stomach sinks. Tears glisten in Mila’s eyes as she holds my gaze. “Say…”

I feel my mom and Oaklynn come up behind me, hearing the intake of breath from my mom. “Call Matt and dad,” I tell her. “We’re going to need them.”

My eyes fall back to the screen, as Oaklynn hugs me to her. I want to break down. I want to cry and let my legs give out.

There is so much blood.