Six & a half

SIX & A HALF

Dahlia

S ubject: RSVP

I would like to RSVP for the wedding on behalf of the Letters & Blooms staff.

Party of four. Chicken for all, please.

Dahlia Foster

P.S. I met the groom in high school. We dated for a while, but it wasn't meant to be. Looking forward to the big day!

S ubject: Re: RSVP

Dahlia,

What part of "I don't want to see you at my wedding" was unclear for you?

Don't embarrass yourself by trying to show up. I will personally ensure that security won't let you through the doors.

Feel free to get your chicken from the closest KFC.

S ubject: Fwd: Re: RSVP

Fuck you, Everett.

I'm trying to be cordial, since my mom's garden IS handling all the arrangements for this ill-fated event.

Speaking of which, I know you're wealthy and all these days, but spending half a million on flowers is overkill…

P.S. Did you invite any of Carmen's secret lovers to the wedding? Do they get special seats?

S ubject: Re: Fwd: Re: RSVP

I don't remember you being the jealous type when we were together.

How unfortunate.

Nonetheless, how I spend half a million dollars is none of your business. But since I spent that on a new car last week, I think I'll be fine.

P.S. Carmen doesn't have any "secret lovers" because she would never cheat on me.

She isn't you .