Chapter Fourteen Madison

A few hours later and the three of us are entertaining ourselves at the carnival. People are pouring in from all over town. The sounds of laughter, music, and carnival employees echo all around us as Sam and I continue to lose badly at a water gun game that Kylie seems to be an expert at.

“Noooo. No way you’re winning again!” I fuss, still trying to win even though it seems impossible.

“Want to bet me ten dollars on it?”

Glancing at Kylie, I roll my eyes. “Hell no… I’ll lose ten dollars.”

Just then, the guys roll up.

“Damn, girl. Remind me not to piss you off. You got game.” Jaxsons’s deep, sultry voice wraps around me as my gaze is pulled from the game ahead to the delicious man next to me. He slings his arm around Kylie’s shoulders just in time to make her lose concentration. Her winning streak slows and she finishes off worse than before, only winning a stuffed polar bear.

His eyes slide to me for a split second, making me clear my throat as I lay the water gun down, suddenly flustered by his presence.

I try my hardest not to let him see that his presence affects me, but unfortunately… It’s hard. Though obviously not as hard as the tension currently echoing between Asher and Sam. The small side glances and smiles that they are giving each other instantly let me know that they need time alone.

As Kylie receives her stuffed polar bear, I turn to Jaxson with a mock-serious on my face.

“Jax, you dipshit! You made her lose her concentration!” I draw him and Kylie away. The destination isn’t important, just giving Sam and Asher the space they need. “Come on, you owe Kylie a bigger stuffed toy, and by God, you’re going to get it for her.”

Jaxson laughs before giving a shrug of his shoulders as he begins to eye the different booths and prizes. “Alright, what is it that you want, Kylie? Madison says I have to make it up to you.”

“Hmmm… let me think.”

With Kylie and Jaxson preoccupied, I glance over my shoulder to find Knox not getting the hint. A heavy sigh escapes me as I stop in my tracks, watching him catch my gaze. “Come on, you’re being a third wheel.”

Knox scratches his head, his eyes widening as he seems to get the idea, before turning to Asher and Sam to exchange a few words. As soon as he is back at my side, I nudge him with my shoulder causing him to laugh. “What? I wasn’t paying attention.”

“Clearly,” I snort. My eyes drift over to where Jaxson and Kylie stand by a milk bottle booth, the size of the large monkey hanging from the rack letting me know exactly what Kylie is after.

“What the heck is Jaxson doing?”

“Trying to win Kylie the monkey since he fucked up her last game,” I chuckle, as we approach the two of them just in time to watch Jaxson knock the last bottle over. Kylie squeals with delight as she picks out the large blue monkey hanging at the back of the tent.

“Nice throw,” Knox tells Jaxson, the two of them exchanging words as Kylie turns back to me holding her monkey with a yawn .

“Don’t tell me you’re tired?” I sigh. “It’s not even five yet. The night’s only just begun!”

Kylie smiles, rolling her eyes. “I’ll stay out a bit longer.”

“Only a bit?”

She doesn’t get a chance to reply when Knox interjects, “So, I don’t know about you guys but I really want a funnel cake.”

I can’t help but scrunch my nose in disgust at the thought. When we were younger, I was obsessed with funnel cakes. It was something we always made sure to get, but the last summer before we graduated, Jaxson, Sam, and I ate so many of them that I made myself sick. And ever since then, I can’t look at them.

“I’m good,” I reply, shaking my head. “No funnel cakes for me.”

“Really? But you loved them,” Jaxson says, catching my attention. The fact that he even remembered that I liked them taking me by surprise.

“‘Loved’ being the key word.”

“She hasn’t eaten one since she got sick in high school,” Kylie pipes up. “Ever since you dared her to eat more than you, if I remember correctly.” She laughs. “So basically, it’s your fault.”

His eyes go wide, and I can’t help but shoot her a “what the fuck” glare. The last thing I need is him daring me to do something like that again, because I won’t back down. Even if I don’t want to do it. I’d never live it down if I did.

“You seriously haven’t eaten one since high school?” he gasps, a smile spreading across his face before laughter escapes him.

“No, I haven’t.”

A devilish grin slowly spreads across his face. There’s a calculating look in his eyes as the imaginary gears seem to turn within his head. I know that look. I remember it all too well. It’s the same look he and Asher would give someone right before they dared them to do something stupid.

Like eating funnel cake until they made themselves sick.

“Don’t you dare,” I say slowly, narrowing my eyes at him.

Once again, laughter leaves him. I look to Kylie and Knox for support, only to see the two of them have ventured off towards the funnel cake stand .

Jaxson wraps a firm arm around my shoulder. “Don’t worry… I don’t really want to see you throw up tonight.”

My eyes lift to meet his and my breath catches in the back of my throat. The last time I was this close to him was when he was with me in Mrs. Kendall’s house. The feeling of how badly I wanted him to kiss me resurfaces.

“Thanks…” The words leave me softer than I expect them to. My heart beating rapidly as he stands staring at me, lips parted as if to say something but unable to.

“Hey! Do you guys want a drink?” Knox calls out, pulling both of our attention towards the funnel cake tent. I move out of Jaxson’s reach as I make my way towards them.

“Yeah, grab me a coke.”

Or anything for that matter to distract me from whatever is going on with Jaxson. I spent years wanting him, wanting everything with him, and it ended with me getting my heart broken. Now, it’s like he finally sees me.

The conflict of my past feelings for Jaxson swells within my chest. How is it that after so many years he’s able to make me feel the way I do around him?

I don’t have to turn around to know that he’s staring at me. The feeling of his eyes boring into the back of my head causes me to glance over my shoulder to see him watching me. A small smile pulls at his lips when he notices me noticing him.

Jesus Christ… Why does that smile look so good on him?

“Everything okay?” I turn to face Kylie who’s frowning at me, shoving a piece of powdered sugar-covered funnel cake in her mouth while struggling with her polar bear and other winnings.

“Yeah,” I reply quickly. “Here let me take those stuffed animals for you while you eat that.”

She willingly passes them over, a low groan of satisfaction leaving her lips as she pops another piece of funnel cake into her mouth. “This is so good…”

Ew .

“More for you.”

“Are you sure you’re okay?” she asks again, her eyes sliding to Jaxson before landing on me. “Every time he’s around…”

I frown at her comment. “Every time he’s around what?”

Shrugging her shoulders, she nods her head in the direction of Jaxson and Knox, who are busy in conversation while picking at the plate of funnel cake in Knox’s hand. “I may not say much, Madi, but I’m not blind. I can tell there’s something going on between you guys, and honestly… I hope there is.”

“Nothing’s going on,” I say, straightening my shoulders. “We’re just friends.”

She pops another piece in her mouth, raising her eyebrow at me. “Uh-huh. Even Sam has said there is something going on with you.”

What the fuck? Sam is talking to Kylie about me and Jaxson?

“There’s nothing.”

As much as I want to keep denying it, I don’t know what to think. I cared about him at one point in my life, but that was back then. There’s no way that I can let myself fall for a man like Jaxson Rivers. Can I?

Looking over towards Jaxson and Knox once more, his eyes meet mine again. There’s something about the depth of his gorgeous eyes that makes me want to swoon. Even if I’m not the swooning kind of girl.

Or am I?

“Hey, so Jaxson wants to check out some of the rides. What do you guys think?” Knox asks, approaching us once more.

Kylie sighs, dumping her plate into a nearby trashcan before wiping her hands off. “Sorry guys, but I really need to get going. I’m exhausted.”

“You’re not really ditching us, are you?” I ask, my eyes quickly darting to where Jaxson stands off to the side of me as if pleading for her to stay.

“Sorry,” she replies with a slight shrug of her shoulders. “I’ve been staying up late painting and not sleeping in. I really need to get some sleep.”

Knox pipes up. “I can walk you back if you want?”

My heart beats faster at the realization that it would just be Jaxson and I left. As much as I used to be fine hanging out with him by myself, that was when we were kids, before everything that happened between us .

“That’d be awesome,” Kylie accepts with a smile on her face as she takes the stuffed animals from my arms. “Can we catch up later?” she asks me.

“Yeah…” I sigh, pushing a smile on my lips. “Give me a call tomorrow.”

I hadn’t expected everyone to dip out on us, but saying our goodbyes to Knox and Kylie, I find myself suddenly excited about being alone with Jaxson. My mind wanders over the possibilities of where the night will lead us. Whether or not I may see a side of Jaxson I’d always wanted to see.

“So…”

His deep voice is like music to my ears. Its ability to thrill me and make me nervous at the same time is a feeling I’ve never gotten used to. But then, do I honestly want to?

The moment I turn to face him, I find myself stuck on how gorgeous he looks. He’s every bit as sexy as he was back in high school. Sharp chiseled jawline, broad shoulders hidden beneath a black t-shirt, hands shoved into the front pockets of his light wash denim jeans.

He literally looks like he stepped out of a magazine, and yet he still reminds me of the man I grew up with. Only older… and a hell of a lot sexier.

Fuck me…

“Sorry…” I reply nervously, glancing around the stalls. “I guess it’s just the two of us.”

“Yeah. Seems like it. Unless you’re planning on heading home as well.”

Home?

“Hell no,” I laugh, shaking my head as I push away the nervousness. “And not get on the Ferris Wheel? You should know me better than that.”

Growing up, the Ferris Wheel was my favorite thing to do and every year it was a ritual for all of us to go on it, despite Sam’s objection to it being way too high. She used to close her eyes when we got to the top, Asher always picked on her for it.

“Can I join you?”

“You’re seriously asking?” I snort. “We’re friends. Why wouldn’t you? ”

My answer seems to spark amusement in Jaxson, as he gestures towards the Ferris Wheel. “Shall we then?”

“Yeah, but first… you have to keep up with me and do every ride on the way there.”

As much as I’d love to just ride the Ferris Wheel with him, the two of us tucked up all cozy in that little chair, something in me doesn’t want the night to end yet. A part of me wants to know if there is more, or if perhaps I’m simply imagining old fantasies.

My words are a challenge, and one that Jaxson happily agrees to. One after another, we make our way through the rides. From the abominable snowman that races in a circle going forward and then backward, to the zipper that locks you in a cage with one other person spinning you in circles until you feel like throwing up.

I never imagined waking up this morning that I would be spending time with Jaxson like this, but I’m glad that I am.

Laughter consumes us both by the time we exit the bumper cars.

“I won, and you know it.” I smirk, his eyes going wide as his mouth drops open.

“You cheated. You literally had that little kid pin me against the wall so you could hit my car.”

I shrug my shoulders with a smile. “I never said there were limits to how you win.”

As the night begins to grow to a close, the time ticking down until the carnival is over—I find myself beside Jaxson, climbing into the Ferris Wheel. My heart beats against my chest as his hand accidentally brushes against mine, setting my body alight.

“So,” I say softly glancing out of the Ferris Wheel cart as it moves slowly allowing other people on. “How are things? I mean, back home.”

Soft laughter escapes him, “They’re okay. I mean, I work all the time.”

“That’s right, you have multiple restaurants don’t you?”

“I do.” He nods, his eyes locked onto me as I try to not let him see how he’s affecting me. “What about you?”

I contemplate my answer. “Still working with Mom, as I have been since we graduated. The bakery is my life, and being in the kitchen means everything to me. ”

“I know that feeling,” he says, his hands clasping in front of him. “Becoming a chef is the best thing I’ve ever done.”

I don’t miss the pride in his words as he says it. A warm wave of understanding flows over me as I see his love of cooking in his eyes. No one could deny the fact that he loves what he does. Just hearing him talk about it, you can see his devotion to his work.

“So, if you’re in the kitchen all the time? I’m sure your girlfriend isn’t too happy about it.”

Trying to be slick doesn’t pay off as well as I thought it would. He stares at me for a moment, his face void of emotion as he sits up straighter leaning back into the seat. “Girlfriend?”

Shit… am I fishing too much?

“Um, yeah.” I laugh trying to play it off. “There’s no way you’re single. You were always the center of attention with the girls back in school.”

“No, I wasn’t,” he laughs, leaning back in the seat with his arm resting upon the top. “Girls weren’t always looking for my attention.”

“Yeah, okay. Whatever you have to tell yourself.”

He seems to catch my sarcasm. Laughter spills from him as he shakes his head. “That was a long time ago, Madi. It isn’t like that anymore.” He catches his breath and gives me a speculative look. “I’m not dating anyone, but honestly, I’m surprised you’re interested.”

“I’m always interested in what you’re up to.”

The words leave my lips before I have a chance to consider what I’m saying. A blush instantly settles over my cheeks, and for once I’m thankful that it’s nighttime. My hope is that he doesn’t notice as I divert my attention to the world below.

“I see,” he replies, silence following before he speaks again. “What about you, Madi? Who are you seeing?”

Laughter escapes me as I admit, “Uh, no one. I haven’t done the dating thing in a very long time.”

“Oh?” He raises a brow and leans in a little closer. “Why’s that?”

As much as I want to not dive into that conversation, there’s something about Jaxson that makes me want to open up. That makes me want to see what the possibilities are even if I am being absolutely foolish. “I don’t know, Jaxson. I’m just tired of not meeting the right person. ”

“How do you know when you’ve met the right person?” he asks in a softer voice, staring at me intently.

Shrugging my shoulders, I open my mouth to tell him that I used to think he fit that criteria, but my words fall short as the ride comes to a stop. My heart pounds as I clear my throat, and realize that answering that question would only be problematic.

“Watch your step,” the ride operator says as we depart our seats, heading down the metal stairs towards the ground.

Glancing around, it’s easy to see that the majority of the people have left already. The once heavy crowds are much slimmer than they once were, and most of the townspeople who had stalls are beginning to clean up.

Turning to face Jaxson, I cross my arms over my chest in a comforting sort of way as my eyes lift to meet his and a small bit of awkwardness flows between us. “Thanks for hanging out with me.”

“No need to thank me,” he replies, running a hand through his hair. “I enjoyed spending time with you.”

If only it led to more… or is that even a good idea?

I nod, still pondering the question. “I enjoyed it as well. I should probably get going, though, I’ve got to help open the bakery in the morning and damn if that alarm clock isn’t a real bitch.”

“Do you need a ride?” he asks, as we make our way towards the car park.

“No, I drove my car. Thank you though.”

The awkward silence that lays between us as we walk is almost suffocating. I want to say more, like how I think we should get dinner tomorrow, or maybe ask him back to my apartment. No, that would be ridiculous… and yet every part of me wants to, despite my best efforts to remind myself of how he broke my heart years ago.

I’m a grown adult for Godsake and I can’t even hold a fucking conversation.

“I’ll catch you later, Madison,” Jaxson says, departing ways with me. My only response is a small wave as I watch him walk away towards his black SUV before I turn back to my car.

All the while my mind is rolling over the conversation between Jaxson and I. Wondering if maybe I did meet the right person, once upon a time. The realization that maybe Jaxson had been that person, but he never knew… so honestly, we never stood a chance.