Chapter 2

2

J.J. POST

One year later…

Drawing in a deep breath, J.J. hesitated, looking at the pamphlets on the table before him – and at his parents' expecting faces. His father was pushing for him to join the Army, while his mother was trying to encourage him to go to college, and he wanted neither. He was able to put this discussion off for a year, taking a break, but now some ‘clock' inside of his parents was obviously ticking because they were bringing it all back up again.

"You say the word, and I'll get you enlisted," his father began – again – and nudged the pamphlet toward him. "You'll love the Army, and it gives you a chance to become a man, learn responsibility, and you can travel the world."

"Afghanistan?" he said glumly – only to see both of his parents hesitate. His father looked slightly concerned for a moment, whereas his mother panicked. It was almost like watching a set of wrestlers ‘tag in' during a match.

"You could go to college here and work part-time," she invited. "I could get you a small position doing odd jobs at the station and…"

"I don't want to work at the station," J.J. interrupted quietly, looking at them. "I honestly don't want to go into the Army either."

"What do you want to do?"

"How can we help you, son?"

"I want to apprentice under Mr. Murray – and stay here."

"The butcher?"

"He doesn't have any children and is looking for someone to learn the job. I would be taking over the business and…"

"The man's a butcher and a taxidermist, J.J.," his father repeated, completely dumbstruck. "If you want to see blood, guts, and gore – then what's wrong with the Army? I mean, the man has all sorts of marbles that he uses for eyeballs and…"

"Jamie," his mother hissed, covering her mouth and looking green around the gills. "Please… we don't have to describe it."

"If the kid wants to be a butcher, then he needs to understand what it's going to be like to skin an animal, hack it into pieces, and yank out the entrails…"

"JAMISON…" his mother yelped before turning and racing down the hallway, her heels clacking on the wood before slamming the bathroom door shut.

His father looked at him – and grinned.

"I love that woman's sensitive tummy and her heart of gold, but seriously, J.J. – why would you want to do something like that?" he asked, looking slightly concerned. "Why don't you do a brief stint in the Army? Give them four years and try it. You might really like it, and at the end of those four years, if you still want to come home and mount deer heads on cheap wooden plaques…"

"Dad…"

"Well, I'm not exactly a hunter, but then again, it's obviously something a lot of people here enjoy," his father chuckled easily. "People here hunt moose, elk, deer, rabbits, and all sorts of things – whereas I just prefer some good ol' moo-cow on a slab of Styrofoam from the grocery store."

"If I become a butcher, I'd be happy to fix you up with a nice steak or two," J.J. grinned. "Might not be from a cow, but you'll never know."

"Kid, you are not right in the head."

"Dad," J.J. laughed easily, smiling at his father. "Look, not everyone is destined to be a teacher, a mechanic, a firefighter, a soldier, or a reporter," he began pointedly as his mother re-emerged from the hallway looking pale. "Some of us just want to have our free time, to get by doing a few things for the community, and I know being a butcher isn't something glorious or exciting – but it's steady, honest work."

"It's filthy work," his mother admonished. "You'll be covered in… stuff. If you are doing taxidermy, then there will be chemicals, stuffing the animals, and who-knows-what-else."

"Mama, it's one of those jobs that people fall into. Nobody wakes up and says, ‘ I want to be a daycare worker' – but they are needed badly. People don't sit up in bed and snap their fingers saying, ‘ I think I'll grow up to be a funeral director '… but the jobs are there."

"Oh mercy… a mortician? J.J., really? "

"I think the little twerp is picking on you, Lucy," his father said, staring him down and then cracking a slight smile. "And he's got a point."

"Don't encourage him, Jamie."

His father looked at him silently, opened his mouth, and then closed it again before grabbing a napkin off the lazy Susan in the center of the table. He yanked a pen out of his shirt pocket and stared at him before scribbling on the napkin.

"What are you doing, Dad?"

"Showing you something," he said distractedly, drawing a sweeping arch across the napkin – and then another one. "You're eighteen, almost nineteen, and this is your path."

"Okaaaay?" he hedged, drawing out the word. "What's that?"

"This is Chloe's path," his father said gently. "That girl will be on her way to the Academy in two years. She'll be there for another four. If she gets flight school like she wants, she will add another year of training to her career path – before she must serve ten years. That is fifteen years of waiting, J.J., and you have your whole world before you," his father urged softly as J.J. stared at the napkin in growing horror.

Fifteen years .

"Live your life, experiment, and try things; don't pigeonhole yourself in some little butcher shop on the outskirts of Juneau. There's an entire big, beautiful world out there to see – and you've got plenty of time to explore, grow, and learn before there is even a chance for your crush on Chloe to develop. I'm not trying to be unkind, but do you understand what I'm saying?"

"But Mr. Murray… "

"Mr. Murray will understand, and if he wants you there – he can wait for you to grow up and live a little."

J.J. swallowed as he stared at the napkin, seeing the hash marks along the lines that ran parallel to each other in strange arcs… never intersecting. He extended his hand, pointing at the napkin, trembling.

"What's that mark?"

"That would be if you served four years… and if you re-up, you would get a bonus and serve two more years. You could come home, buy a place, and start setting up your life while learning your trade before re-evaluating things with Chloe King. Time has a way of changing things, and you might find someone else along the way."

"I won't…"

"Or she might," his father said quietly. "You're both young. Focus on becoming the man I see before me, waiting to be free to explore the world – and then you can come home to settle down."

"What about college?" his mother interjected.

"I don't want to go to college," J.J. said firmly, staring at the napkin grimly with his gut churning painfully. Reaching across the table slowly, his fingers grabbed it, pulling it back and wadding it into a ball in his fist… before meeting his father's eyes. "Four years?"

"It will pass in the blink of an eye."

"Fine. You win."

And with that, J.J. got up and left the room, determined to text Chloe.

Chloe, I wish we were closer and could talk .

J.J. sat on the edge of his bed, feeling sick to his stomach and just wanting to be alone. He could hear his parents talking in the other room and knew that his mother was upset that he wasn't attending college. Becoming a reporter like her was sooo far down on the list of dreams that it was almost in the negative range. Being in the Army hovered around a zero – to a ‘one' on the scale.

What's going on?

Is the Academy four years of school?

Yes – it's like a college but for the Air Force. Why?

No reason.

J.J. – why are you asking?

I've got some time to burn, I suppose…

What do you mean?

Four years of college, then flight school, and then you have to serve, right?

Yes.

I guess I didn't realize what a commitment it was.

Are you mad?

No, just surprised and a little stunned. I guess I always assumed that we would still be talking in a few years.

Why won't we be talking?

Won't you be busy?

It's a job – I still get time off, silly.

I'm enlisting in the Army.

WHAT?

Wait… what happened? I thought you were going to tell your parents you wanted to take over a local business.

I did – and we had a long talk. I've got time until you are out of the Academy, and then we'll have to see where you get stationed. I want us to continue talking, but it makes it really hard to ask you out on a date.

His message said ‘Read,' and not a moment later the phone rang in his hand. He hurriedly answered it, trying to hide the fact that he was talking to Chloe, wanting to keep this a secret between them.

"Hello?" he whispered quietly.

"You want to ask me out?"

"Well, talking leads to dating, and I would like us to go on a date someday – if you aren't too busy."

"So you are planning on just joining the Army until I get stationed somewhere… and then what?" her voice was so disjointed, so hesitant, that he knew she was struggling with this too.

"Then I want to fly to your location and take you to dinner."

"This is crazy, J.J."

"I know it is – but this is our life right now. We're friends that are two thousand miles apart."

"But we won't be two thousand miles apart forever – will we?"

"No. "

"Then yes, I will go out with you," Chloe announced like she was the Queen of England, bestowing her favor on him. "You'll wait for me."

"And you'll wait for me?"

"We're friends, remember? We'll always be here for each other."

"Always, my Chloe," he whispered hoarsely, feeling his eyes sting as he realized that the girl he had a massive crush on was agreeing to a date with him in the undetermined future. "I know you'll be busy with the Academy, and I'll be off to boot camp or whatever else comes after that, but don't forget about me."

"You don't forget me either," she replied softly. "Be safe and text me every once in a while. We can write letters, mail packages, or…"

"Or meet up for that first date."

"And that first kiss."

"Chloe, you are killing me," he admitted softly. "I'm going to miss our Christmases more than ever before."

"Guess we'll just have to make up for them whenever we see each other again, eh?"

"I promise."

"Breathe, J.J.," she encouraged gently. "I know you are nervous about enlisting, but if this is what you want to do – then you know I'll support you in any way that I can. I'll be cheering you on, and you'll have to send me a photo of you with that buzz cut."

"Can we exchange a photo now?"

"I'll send one as soon as I hang up," she promised, and he closed his eyes, swallowing.

"Chloe," he began, his voice cracking. "Go get ‘em, little Queen… and show those suckers in the blue who the real boss is. "

"Oh, I will," she chuckled, and he could hear the tears in her voice – realizing that they might be saying ‘goodbye' for a little while. If he was going to be shipping off to boot camp soon, this might be it for a while between them. "Let me know when you are heading out."

"Same – and I'm serious. Go make a name for yourself and rule the world, my Chloe."

"I promise."

Not a moment later, they both hung up, and he sat there, reeling. He felt so alone, so adrift and lost, that it was staggering to think that life was going to go on regardless of whether he stayed here and worked or if he left to serve in the Army somewhere.

"You know I would never force you into doing something you hated," his father began quietly from the doorway.

J.J. turned around and looked at him, unsure what to say. He wasn't sure just how much his father heard of the very private conversation – and could see regret, fear, and confusion in his eyes. It was a very strange, almost pivoting moment that hung between them… like his father was seeing him – the real version – for the very first time.

"I just don't want you to miss out on anything, and some of my best memories are sitting around the barracks cracking jokes with my friends. I love your mother and my life here, but those are special times that no man should miss out on. Your mother swept into my world. She showed me that there were other adventures to be had – and I just want to show you the doorway to the first one. Does that make sense?"

"You're right," J.J. said quietly, feeling adrift. "It's going to be years before I ever have a chance with Chloe – and I need that time to pass quickly. "

"You shouldn't wish your life away, and that's not what I'm…"

"Dad, I'm enlisting," he interrupted, feeling more resolved. "I've got seven years until I find out where she's stationed – and seven years to figure myself out."

"All I'm asking is for you to keep your mind and heart open. It would be foolish to settle on one person when you never know what the world will bring you. I mean, just look at my situation. I thought for sure I would be marrying Annabelle – and then things changed for the better. I married your mother, we've had two beautiful children, and life is incredible. I just want the same for you."

"Me too, Dad. Me too."

But with Chloe.