20. Chapter Twenty

JAX

The dawn in Nethermore bleeds a pale blue over the horizon, the sun a mere ghost behind the thick veils of ether that hang over the icy landscape. It's an alien morning, and despite my dragon heritage, which thrives in the harshness of elemental extremes, the bone-chilling cold here bites deep.

This is my first time visiting the distant, inhospitable realm.

I adjust my coat, tucking my chin down against the sharp wind as it whips across the vast, frost-covered plains. We've barely set foot into this expanse, and already, the wildness of it tests us, pulling at the edges of comfort and familiarity.

Rose walks beside me, her steps uncertain on the icy ground. Each step seems an effort, her usual grace replaced by a cautious, measured gait. I can see her discomfort, her breath forming little puffs of mist as it freezes in the frigid air. It's tough to watch—she's always so sure, so spirited. Now, edged with hesitation, she seems almost diminished.

"Remind me to never come here again," she grumbles, her lips tinged blue.

She hates the cold. Never saw much of it growing up in Australia.

Chaos chuckles, casting a warming charm over our group that has everyone sighing in relief as the feeling crawls back into our fingers and toes. We've only been out here an hour.

As the morning wears on, the challenges mount. The ground beneath us hardens, becoming slippery, treacherous. Some in our group falter, their feet slipping out from under them. Kieran and Deakan in particular struggle with the tundra. While several of Kieran's family are frost fae, his serpent order prefers to bask in the heat, which is why his grandmother often used ice as punishment for him.

It's then I step in, lending a steadying arm, guiding them over a particularly icy ridge.

I knew it was cold here, but I expected to have to spend more time fighting the aether beasts than the landscape.

Midday finds us huddled together for warmth during a brief respite. We share what food remains unfrozen, and the meager heat from it gives scant relief against the penetrating cold. I catch Rose's eye, noting the light of the struggle in her gaze. There's a fire there, unquenched by the cold, and it reassures me. She's still with us, still fighting.

Theo studies the approaching wall of ice. "That's no natural storm."

Chaos glances up. "You're right."

The weather turns again without warning, the sky darkening as fierce winds kick up a blinding swirl of snow and ice. The group's formation breaks as some are caught off-guard, the visibility dropping to near nothing in moments.

Instinct and training kick in. I reach out, grabbing an arm here, a coat there, pulling them back into a tight circle. We move, half-blind, through the storm, our senses the only thing keeping us from straying into danger. When Mekhi stumbles, I'm there, hauling him back on his feet, not through patience but necessity. We can't afford to lose anyone, not here. Not before we've come across a single bloodvine, shadow wraith, or will-o'-the-wisp.

Preferably not after that, either.

By the time we come across our first cabin and make camp, the storm has passed, but its effects linger. We're cold, our energies spent. As we set up a shelter against the wind, using spells and physical barriers alike, there's a quiet fortitude among us. This is what it means to travel the Aether Plains—endurance, resilience.

Rose stands at the edge of the cabin grounds, looking out into the fading light. I join her, standing silent at her side. She doesn't speak, but her presence is enough.

The cabin, a solitary, log-like structure amid the expansive frozen tundra of Nethermore, stands simple against the icy backdrop. It's not brown like most log cabins because it's made with a different kind of tree. Surrounding it, Frosthollows—tall, with branches like fingers dipped in frost—cluster sparsely, their crystalline leaves shimmering under the dimming twilight. These must be the white trees used to make the structure.

No other cabins are in sight.

"If all we're fighting is a little cold, crossing the Aether Plains is easy," I murmur, more to convince myself than her. I don't know why Chaos made such a big deal about it, or why he thinks this is a good prelude to our ascension. While we faced no real obstacles, we are exhausted.

Now all I want to do is drag Rose into that cabin and sleep. My muscles strain, and now that I'm no longer actively moving, the sweat has chilled me even further. Not even my dragon seems to be able to chase away the bitter cold.

None of us seems to be able to control our magic well right now. It's a good thing we haven't come across any wraiths or other creatures said to plague this place.

I eye the cabin with longing before I turn back to the small plate on my lap. First, we must eat. It's a quiet affair, and the steaks don't seem to go down as easily with exhaustion weighing me down.

As the darkness deepens, painting long shadows across the snow, we settle in. The cold is relentless, but so are we. Each of the mates prepares for the guardian ritual to protect us while we sleep, and Rose and I say our goodnight before climbing up the cold, rickety steps to the one-room cabin.

We shut the door behind us, and before we can cast a lighting spell, the unmistakable sound of a lock engaging meets our ears. Whipping around to look at the door, I try the handle, and it won't budge.

"Are we locked in here?" Rose whispers.

"Appears so."

We exchange glances in the pitch darkness, both of us struck speechless by our sudden predicament. How could this be? There was no reason for this cabin, neglected and abandoned as it was, to imprison us.

"Did anyone else come inside?" Rose asks after a moment, her voice echoing weirdly in the small room.

"No."

I cast a lighting charm to see our way through the room, the warm glow illuminating the dust particles suspended in the cold air, though it is dim. As though it's on mere fumes. The light reveals a quaint space consisting of a few chairs, a small, rickety table, a tiny bed, and a fireplace. It's austere, lined with shelves filled with books about Fae history and lore.

Pain, sharp and sudden, stabs me squarely in the back, a gasp escaping my lips as I crumple to the floor.

"Jax!" Rose cries, rushing to kneel beside me, eyes darting around for the danger that brought me to my knees. "What happened?" Her hands flutter over my back, careful not to touch what's obviously causing me pain. Her skin lights up its radiant blue as she works to heal whatever is hurting me.

I wince but manage a small grin up at her. "Help me take off my coat."

Rose obliges, her delicate hands working swiftly to undo the fastenings of my thick winter jacket. The frigid air rushes over my heated skin as she peels the fabric away. I grit my teeth, bracing against the sting that courses through me.

With the jacket removed, Rose's gasp reverberates in the space as I double over again, agony robbing my breath.

Sobs rent the air, but not from me, from my mate. "Tell me what's happening! Chaos! Theo!" she cries, blasting the door with magic, but it won't budge.

Silence greets us on the other side.

I roar out a grunt of pain as my back spasms.

Rose's blue glow intensifies; she's practically vibrating with untapped power. Her hands hover above me, using her luna fae magic to stem the pain and heal whatever ails me.

"Jax!" she gasps, fingers trembling over the blood spilling into her hands from my back. "You're … you're growing your wings!"

Barely conscious, I manage a weak smile. "About fucking time," I grunt, pushing through the pain.

My dragon form hurt the first time I shifted, but this is a different kind of pain. Giant wings that take up the entire space of the room burst from my back in a spectacular explosion of scales and sinew. My vision blurs with the intensity of it, and I can hear her crying out in horror, helpless as she watches my metamorphosis.

Just as suddenly as the pain came on, it ebbs away, retreating like a tide. I gasp, drawing in a deep breath as the sensation of wholeness washes over me.

I open my eyes, taking in the sight of my new wings, their scales shimmering with a green, metallic sheen. Their tips brush against the wooden rafters of the cabin, their span far too wide for the small, enclosed space.

Rose's gasps quieten as she takes in the sight of me, her wide eyes filled with awe. Her blood-soaked hands explore the strange new extension of myself, tracing patterns across the emerald scales, and a full-body shudder works through me.

Her hand pauses as she meets my eyes. "Did that hurt?"

"Fuck no, keep going," I breathe.

Her laughter rings out as her fingers skim the surface of my wings, her touch a pleasant counterpoint to the echo of pain that reigned only moments ago.

I want to turn around to scoop her into my arms and take her to bed, but I can't move in the cramped cabin. Not with giant wings. A smile works its way onto my face. They might be bigger than Theo's.

Her laughter soon dissolves into an awestruck silence as Rose's gentle fingers trace stronger patterns over the delicate structure of my wings, her touch causing spirals of energy to radiate out through my veins.

Before I can ponder about it, the room fills with a soft, ambient glow. I cast a look over my shoulder and find that the light originates from Rose, her skin taking on a luminescent blue hue. The sight of her glowing skin has my heart racing in my chest, because I know what it signifies.

It calls to the primal instincts in me, stirring a growl from the darkest depths of my chest. My dragon takes to her blue glow like a faemoth to a flame. It'd mount her if I let him.

The gentle caress of her fingers along my wings is both exhilarating and soothing, but the cramped space of the cabin leaves little room for their full span. Reluctantly, I prepare to retract them. The sensation is peculiar—like a cool shiver tracing down my spine as I will the wings to withdraw. They fold neatly, the tips tucking into the skin along my back, a slight tingling sensation marking their retreat. It's an odd relief to feel them slot into place, hidden but always ready, a part of me that is both foreign and deeply familiar.

Turning so I face her, I gesture towards the small bed. "We'd better warm up. Don't want me getting frostbite, do you?" I grin at her.

There's a startled blink from Rose, then a laugh escapes her lips. With a shake of her head, she sends me a coy smile. "Of course not," she drawls out. Her fingers trace over my bare chest, leaving trails of warm sensation in their wake. With a mischievous glint in her eyes, Rose continues, "But I don't think that would be a problem anymore." Her statement is punctuated with the wave of her hand. In their wake, the air shimmers with undulating heat, filling the cabin with warmth.

I blast a shot of fire magic at the fireplace, watching as the logs ignite with a whoosh. A flicker of satisfaction tugs at my lips as the steady crackling sound fills the room. The added warmth seeps into my bones.

I take deep breaths, inhaling the scent of burning wood.

Rose is leaning against the wooden frame of the bed, a soft and amused smile resting on her lips. Her cerulean eyes flicker in the firelight, bewitching me. It's more than just a physical connection, it's an emotional one, too.

She moves closer to me, her steps barely making a sound on the wooden floor. She places herself between me and the fire, her outline faintly glowing against the blazing hearth. She rests her hands on my chest, a soft sigh escaping her lips as she nestles into my embrace. A flame of hesitation flickers in her eyes.

"Will you tell me why you have no soul?"

I hiss a breath. Wasn't expecting that.

I cross to the bed and pull back the covers, gesturing for her to get in. Quickly, she peels out of her clothes and slips beneath the heavy quilts. Her eyes remain on me, as the question lingers in the air, heavy as the winter's night outside our cabin.

Crawling in after her, I pull her into my side, and she rests her head on my chest. Her pineapple shampoo wafts from her hair, and I breathe it in.

How do I explain this in a way that doesn't destroy the fragile connection we've built as a family?

"Overnight, I watched my best friend become a shell of the fae he was the day before."

"Kieran," Rose whispers, her breath steaming in front of her as her eyes turn glossy. I know he's blamed her family for what happened to his parents.

I can even understand why he did, though I don't agree with it.

"Kieran," I confirm. "It was bad after his mom died. But after he found his dad dead?" I shake my head. "He lost the will to live."

Tears soak my chest from where Rose's head rests. Her chest rises and falls with silent sobs. I stroke her hair, attempting to quell the ache she feels at the thought of her mate being in such despair.

About how close we came to losing him. Twice now.

"I tried to help him," I continue, my voice heavy with regret. "Deak and I did everything we could to pull him from the dark abyss he'd fallen into. But every attempt was in vain, like grasping at smoke because he was slipping away. He was too far gone. So, I hunted down a god—and found one."

Rose stills, her eyes finding mine, her breath catching. "Chaos?" she whispers, as though if she spoke it quietly enough, it couldn't be true.

I nod, watching the gears turn in her head, like she's trying to read the chapters of my life I've never spoken aloud.

She sits up to face me, nose less pink than it was now that the room is warming. "Is this why you don't like him?" she asks, a tremor in her voice as her breath comes in shallow pants, as if she's on the verge of a panic attack.

"In exchange for my soul, Kieran would reclaim his will to live, find happiness again. And he has, hasn't he? He has all of us now." I try to sound matter-of-fact, but a twinge of bitterness seeps through.

"So why the hate? Because he has your soul?" She shifts, pulling her knees closer beneath the blanket we share.

I scoff, a humorless sound, just a scrape of raw truth. "I find it awfully convenient that he shows up here claiming to be your soul bonded mate."

She doesn't say it out loud, but I can sense the thread of panic through our bond. She's quiet for a long time after that.

"Are you … jealous, Jax?" she finally asks, voice soft and uncertain, eyes wide with disbelief.

That wasn't what I was expecting to come out of her mouth. Not after the bomb I dropped on her. I expected she'd be pissed at Chaos, knowing he has my soul. Though, I do sense the grief, like a live wire pulsing where our bond sits in my chest.

"Jealous?" The word comes out scoffed, more bitter than I intend. "No, Rose. I'm not jealous. I'm furious."

Her eyebrows knit together in confusion. "Furious?"

Dragon fae are possessive, but this runs deeper than that. "I want to be your soul bonded mate. You were blessed with two—which is so rare I've never even heard of it—while I'm just a regular mate?—"

She slaps her hand over my mouth, her eyes flaring with anger along with the quick flash of her luna aura. "Don't you dare belittle our bond," she hisses. "I chose you, Jax. What I have with you means just as much as what I have with them!" She is shaking with rage.

I hold her gaze, a sense of shock washing over me. Not once has Rose ever shown this side of her, the side that defends what we have with such fierceness. I swallow hard, reaching up to pull her hand away from my mouth. Her eyes remain hard, refusing to back down.

"Rose," I murmur, "you must understand. It isn't you. It's me. Deep down, I feel as if I'm not… deserving. Not equal to those who are soul bonded with you."

Her gaze softens slightly, her anger seeming to ebb away. "Deserving? Fuck, Jax. What part of I chose you isn't sinking in?" She's kneeling in front of me now, clutching my face between her palms. Okay, maybe she's still a little mad. I can feel the sharp prick of her nails biting against my cheeks. "I have two soul bonds, yet I still want you. I am yours just as much as you are mine. Enough of this self-sabotaging bullshit." Her face is inches from mine now, the fire flickering across her face, painting harsh shadows across her tanned face.

Yeah, she's still pissed.

"I …" I begin, but my voice trails off, lost in the pools of her eyes. I've always known Rose to be passionate, but this raw emotion is something I hadn't expected. It makes my heart throb painfully in my chest, my dragon stirring within at the sight of our mate so livid.

I take a deep breath, my hand coming up to caress her cheek in return. "I'm sorry, Rose …" My voice is barely a whisper, the words curling out into the air between us. "I just … I worry," I admit, my gaze flickering down to where she's kneeling between my parted thighs. "I worry that I'm not enough for you, that I can't give you what your other mates can."

A laugh bubbles up from her throat, not a mocking one, but one full of warmth and affection. Her fingers skim across my bare chest and my dragon preens under her touch. "If you weren't enough for me, do you think we would be here right now?" she asks rhetorically, her lips curving into a gentle smile. Her hand moves from my chest, trailing up to cup my jaw.

"Jax," she whispers, and I can see the sincerity shining in her eyes. "Every one of my mates, each of you, brings something unique to our bond. Something that cannot be replaced or replicated."

Her words wash over me like a soothing balm, cooling the burning insecurities that have been gnawing at me. "Love isn't quantifiable," she continues gently, her thumb stroking a comforting path across my jawline. "It's not like pie where there's a finite amount to go around. We're not divided among each other, we're multiplied." Her voice is steady, soothing the troubled emotions within me.

Her thumb gently traces my lips before she leans in, pressing her own against them in a slow, searing kiss. I can taste the sweet promise in her mouth, feel the tender declaration in her touch. With every brush of lips, every stroke of tongues, she tells me in no uncertain terms that I am cherished, loved.

"I know my love riddles you with insecurities," she murmurs between kisses, her breath warm against my cheek. "And I'm truly sorry for that. Please know you aren't a cog in a machine, or a means to securing magic for the realm. You're an integral part of my life, and by the gods, I wouldn't survive it if something happened to any one of you. You were my first so many things, and are so very special to me, Jax. You are mine, and I am yours, just as much as the others."

Her kisses are wet now, soaked with tears that begin trickling down her cheeks and onto mine. I feel her heart beating against my chest, feel the heat of her tears seeping into my skin, and it feels like my own heart is being torn in two. The raw vulnerability in her voice makes me want to shield her from all her fears, to reassure her that nothing can come between us.

"I love you, Rose," I whisper, my words trembling as I pronounce each letter of her name like a sacred incantation. I kiss a hot trail down her throat, tasting the sea-salt tang of her tears. Beneath my lips, her pulse thrums a nervous staccato. I want to tell her that she's my sun, my moon, and my stars, that my life begins and ends with her, that she is everything that is good in me, but words fail me.

Quietly, she helps me out of the rest of my clothes, her touch careful and reverent. It is as though she's navigating holy ground, unearthing a divine relic with each layer she peels away.

She swings a leg over mine and seats herself onto me. Her body is both soft and firm against mine, the warmth seeping into my very bones. The wet trails of her tears have dried up, but the remnants of her vulnerability remain etched in the tremor of her hands as they explore the contours of my body.

"Thank you," she breathes, as she rocks her hips against mine.

She doesn't elaborate, but she doesn't need to. I ensured Kieran's happily-ever-after, which includes my mate.

Her eyes close, the lashes dark against her glowing skin, and I can't help but watch her as she moves. Her hair tumbles around her like a halo, a rich brown catching in the faint light of the room, as my hands run up and down her sides.

Her breath fans across my skin as she leans in and places a gentle kiss on the tender skin of my throat. I feel the brush of her lips, the softness of her touch, and it's as if we're communicating in a language that only we understand. An intimate conversation without words.

Rose's tiny fangs pierce my neck and there's a momentary sting, but it quickly gives way to a warmth that spreads from the point of contact, coursing through my veins like liquid fire.

My dragon preens inside me, so pleased with this intimate connection, me buried in her, and her buried in me. Her pussy clamps down on me, and her nails score my skin as she rides the cresting wave of her pleasure. I follow closely behind her, my own release washing over me with a force that leaves me breathless.

Silence fills the room after, broken only by the sound of our panting breaths. Rose doesn't pull away. Instead, her fangs retract, but she keeps herself nestled against my neck, her body still humming with the traces of our shared pleasure.

Happy and content looks good on her.