35. Ava

I cheermyself up with thoughts of the weekend. It's a rare chance to sleep in and laze around…not that my new wolf metabolism will let me laze around until noon anymore.

I'm spending the day with Tyler.

The notion of spending the day with Tyler sparks a flurry of excitement within me, making my heart flutter. It almost feels like we're tiptoeing around a real date, despite doing everything backward.

My life has never followed a conventional path, much to my mother's amusement and occasional exasperation. "Ava," she would say, "you may not fit into the mold society expects of you, but you must always stay true to yourself."

As I wipe steam off the mirror, my reflection gazes back at me, and Mom's eyes look right through me. I can't help but wonder what she would make of my current dilemma. Would she advise caution, or encourage me to leap into the fray, especially given my suspicion about my father's identity and his connection to the hunters? The same hunters who, I now realize with a heavy heart, must have been on clan lands for me…and knew the truth about my mother's death.

I need proof.

Oh, how I wish I could just call her, hear her voice, and get that wise nudge moms give. It feels like I was robbed of that.

Blowing out a steadying breath, I dress quickly, opting for the simple comfort of jeans and a basic black T-shirt. My hair, still damp from the shower, cascades in loose waves over my shoulders as I make my way out.

The sounds of Tyler conversing with Eloise in the kitchen reach my ears, prompting me to eavesdrop while I sit on Eloise's bed, putting on my shoes.

"You're like a fount of Ava knowledge." Tyler sounds impressed and amused.

"I've known Ava for a while," Eloise responds, her voice carrying a smile. "Oh, and she hates mushrooms. Never include them in anything. Ever."

"Got it," Tyler replies with mock solemnity. "Anything else I should know?"

Realizing I should intervene before Eloise reveals some random, deep dark secret from freshman year of college, I stand and make my appearance.

"There she is!" Eloise beams, her vibe unshaken by the early hour. "I'm spending the day with my dads, so don't wait up. You know the codes to get in." She sweeps me into a brisk hug before darting off to her room.

"She's…" Tyler begins, searching for the right words.

"She's Eloise," I interject, seeing her as perfect as ever. "Ready to go?"

"Absolutely." Tyler stands there, looking effortlessly handsome in jeans and a long-sleeved T-shirt that accentuates his eyes—a striking shade of green.

"And where might we be heading?" I inquire.

"That," he says, winking, "is a surprise."

I hum softly as we leave the apartment building. Tyler's hand guides me gently toward his car, his touch sending a warm shiver down my spine. He opens the passenger door with a gallant flourish, and I'm greeted by the cozy blast of the heater as I buckle up.

Tyler keeps stealing glances my way as he drives, clearly concerned. "What's on your mind?" he probes, playing a nervous rhythm with his thumbs on the steering wheel.

Caught off guard, I muster up a vague response. "Just thinking," I murmur, thoughts of my dad swirling in the back of my mind.

"Do you want to talk about it?" His voice carries softness and warmth, yet beneath it, I can feel the swirl of our complicated feelings. Our relationship seems mismatched, like we're puzzle pieces from different boxes trying to fit together. Despite this, my draw to Tyler and this unexpected moment of my life is too strong to deny. Ignoring this bond, this deep-seated connection, feels like denying a part of myself. It's a thought that aches to even entertain.

"Maybe," I say, clinging to the middle ground. "Where are we going?"

The scenery shifts as he drives south, toward the edge of clan lands. My father's house lies only a few miles from here, a thought that sends a shiver down my spine. Tyler's playful secrecy only adds to the anticipation. "It's a surprise," he teases, pulling onto a gravel driveway and parking in an improvised spot marked by years of use.

"This is the forest," I observe, casting a doubtful look his way. "I don't see a restaurant anywhere."

"Okay, hear me out," Tyler says, killing the engine and turning to face me, his nervousness palpable. "I had this idea…" He trails off, rubbing his neck. "What if we shift and hunt for our lunch?" The words rush out like a cascade of nerves and excitement.

"Like raw meat?" The concept triggers a visceral reaction in me, but I push it aside, intrigued despite myself.

"Yes, like raw meat," he replies, rolling his eyes, "and maybe I can teach you how to shift seamlessly between forms."

The offer is unexpected yet strangely fitting, a nod to the shifter life I'm still getting used to—an identity I was unaware of until recently.

"What could go wrong?" I whisper to myself, the decision made. "All right," I announce, stepping out of the car without waiting for Tyler. The forest greets me like an old friend, its visage more vivid and alive than ever before. Without the veil of my human perception, every color, every scent is intensified.

"Letting your spiritkin through is overwhelming at first," Tyler remarks, joining me. His presence anchors me amid the rush of new sensations.

"Will you teach me?" I ask, hope coloring my voice.

His responding smile is everything—roguish and filled with wonder. "I'd love nothing more, butterfly," he says, moving to the trunk to retrieve what we need. "Now strip," he instructs.

Rolling my eyes, I follow his lead and start by shedding my jacket, all while Tyler peels off his shirt. I avert my gaze deliberately, knowing all too well the distraction his body poses—a distraction I can ill afford at the moment. I really want to learn to shift.

Piece by piece, my clothes join his on the forest floor—shirt, shoes, socks, and pants—until I'm exposed to the cool air in just my bra and panties.

"All your clothing, butterfly," Tyler prompts, glancing up at me briefly as he slips off his boxers, his body revealing nothing of the shyness I feel.

I turn away quickly, my mind racing with memories of our closeness, each more intoxicating than the last. Caught between hesitation and defiance, I let go of the final barriers, my clothes joining his in a silent declaration of readiness.

"I can smell your arousal," Tyler comments nonchalantly, closing the trunk.

"Shift, and maybe later…" I throw back, daring a glance at his form, my bravado a thin veil over the racing pulse beneath my skin.

"Promises, promises," he teases, closing the distance with a confident stride. "Okay, close your eyes."

"This is how horror movies start," I mutter, though I comply, shutting my eyes tightly.

Tyler's hands are gentle on my arms, coaxing them to relax at my sides. "Now, connect with your spiritkin, with your wolf," he guides, his voice a steady current in the shifting tide of my thoughts. "Turn inward. Let the world fade, and follow the thread of your consciousness to that inner spark. Reach for it."

I take a deep breath, letting his words anchor me as I try to still the whirlwind of thoughts—my father's shadow over my life, Ethan's betrayal, and the confusion of my emotions. I push them aside, searching for the core of my soul.

When I think I open my eyes, I'm met with darkness, despite the time of day.

Tyler's voice reaches me, distant yet clear. "What do you see?"

"The forest. I'm still here," I whisper, my voice a flicker of sound in the vast silence.

"Good, very good." His praise is a warm balm. "Do you see your wolf?"

Searching the shadows, I see a pair of glowing eyes. "There," I say, the spark of connection fleeting as the vision dissolves with my forward step, leaving me blinking into Tyler's concerned face.

"I lost it," I confess, the sting of failure sharp.

"It's all right," he soothes, his hands warming my arms. "It's a journey. It'll get easier, I promise. Soon, calling her will be as natural as the beat of your heart."

His reassurance, free of any judgment and filled with empathy, reignites my determination.

I can do this.

"Okay," I say, channeling a rush of determination that pumps strength into every fiber of my being. I close my eyes once more, letting my whirlwind of thoughts scatter into the crisp air like leaves in the wind. Gradually, the mystical forest reappears before me, and there she is, my spirit animal, poised majestically at the base of an ancient, gnarled oak tree. She cocks her head, an ear twitching in my direction, and I'm mesmerized by the sight of her fur dancing in an ethereal breeze that seems to touch only her.

Her eyes are pools of ancient wisdom, glowing with a mystical fire that feels both alien and familiar. In this moment, I realize we're not just connected, but we're also woven from the same cosmic fabric.

She moves toward me, her presence commanding yet gentle, her tail carrying whispers of the night's deepest shadows. She dips her head and scents the air, as if judging the essence of my being.

That's when it hits me—she is judging me. She is determining if I'm worthy to wear her skin. This must be what it's like for those who are bitten by shifters, those who have to prove their worth to their spiritkin.

I lower myself to the ground with a reverence that feels as old as time itself, our movements synchronized in a dance set by the stars. Our foreheads touch, and in her eyes, I catch a glimpse of eternity—a bond that transcends time, connecting us in a way words could never capture.

"So this is what it feels like," I murmur as my soul seems to stitch itself back together, the broken pieces fitting into a seamless whole.

Her purr vibrates through me in a sound so profound, it feels like the earth itself is resonating within my chest. Together, we stand, our essences blending so seamlessly that the line between woman and wolf fades into nothingness.

As I open my eyes, the forest around us is alive in a way it's never been before, every leaf, every whisper of wind, an extension of my newly discovered self. I am the ancient pines, the fertile earth beneath us, and the very breath of the forest.

"Well done, butterfly." Tyler's voice, filled with pride and affection, resonates within me. "Now let's see if you can shift back."

I let go of my wolf form, feeling her slip away as effortlessly as a dream fades at dawn, and then I stand before Tyler, his smile lighting up the dark like the first rays of morning sun.

"Ready to run?" he asks, his excitement so contagious, it sparks a fire within me.

"Yeah, yeah, I am," I reply, my own excitement bubbling over. We exchange grins, two wild hearts on the verge of an adventure.

We shift together, embracing our wolf forms once more. As I shake out my fur, I can't help but let out a laugh, feeling it echo around us. Tyler shifts with a fluidity I'm itching to master, but that's for another day. Today, I get to run as a wolf, wild and free, with Tyler by my side, embracing the untamed spirit within us both.