16. Lazy Bumper Duck River

“ T ADAAA!” Octavius cried, waving towards the slow-moving river. This area of the water park, at least near the river, looked like it was in a jungle.

Well, it was a jungle, if you ignored the people in duck…innertubes? He wasn’t sure if that was the right term for them, as they had motors on them. The bottom part was innertube shaped, and you sat in it like one, with your feet hanging over, but there was a large bumper rim around it, a joystick on the right and left side, and the duck’s head, which usually went on the front, was set behind the person facing outward, acting as kind of a head slash back rest.

Regardless of what they were called, he was not going to ignore the people in them, because they were the best part. Instead of boringly floating along, everyone was bouncing off each other, their laughter and giggles were loud and clear.

Ahh…it looked so fun, and…little kid free. The ride was apparently only for those fifteen and older.

“Why…is it called The Lazy Bumper Duck River? What’s lazy about this?” Turney asked, his brows pulled together.

Octavius’ head tilted as he looked out over the river. People were zooming around, some using the fake plant life to hide behind before attacking…

He had to say, ‘lazy’ was not the term that came to mind. Yet under the noise of the water, and the sounds of the humans, he heard the soft buzzing noise of the motors. “Maybe it’s because you don’t actually have to swim? They are motorized.”

“Motorized bumper…ducks…” Scarlett’s nose wrinkled. “I’m surprised we missed this yesterday.”

Octavius was not surprised at all.

“Well, my dear friends, you two aren’t exactly bumper duck type people. More…boringly float around and experience the ‘wonders’ of nothing type of individuals…” Ugh…

Min-ji snorted.

“Why move when I don’t have to?” Scarlett chuckled. “You should try to stay still for a while. At the very least it would delay your chaos for a bit.”

A shudder of horror slid through him at the very thought of it. “How could you even suggest such a thing?!” he cried.

Stay still—ugh!

Turney chuckled. “He’d likely implode.”

Octavius pouted. “I would not!” He may…just a bit. “Anyway, enough of wishing nightmare situations on me! Come on, let’s get in line!”

He looped his arm through Turney’s and tugged the zombie into the line to join the ride, trying to ignore the sign that said there was a ten minute wait. Surely, it wouldn’t be that long, right?

Oh…this is why he always got fast passes to get in quickly to things. Lines… The worst part of amusement parks, or really parks of any kind, were the lines! Lines for bathrooms, lines for food, lines to sit… Lines, lines, lines!

He rocked on his feet where he stood, willing the people ahead to move out of his way. Eyeing how close the man in front of him was, he slowly smiled. Nudging just a bit closer, he turned to face Turney, inconspicuously moving a hand behind his back. The man was less than a fingertip away, he just needed to close his eyes, go into ‘super vamp’ mode, and?—

“Don’t even think about it,” his zombie bun snapped.

Octavius stiffened, staring wide eyed at Turney. “I don’t?—”

“You know exactly what I’m referring to, you impatient bat. You can wait.”

His eyes widened and he fluttered his lashes, before trying to ‘cute’ Turney into letting him do it. “But?—”

“No.”

“It would be harmle?—”

“I don’t care.”

“You’re not even letting me finish!” he whined.

“Because your arguments for what you were about to do will in no way change my mind.”

Octavius let out a louder whine and spun with a hmph, crossing his arms.

Scarlett snickered. “Good job, Turney. Maybe you are less of a sap than I thought you were.”

He gasped—the audacity! Spinning back around, he yelled, “Traitor!” while pointing at the female zombie. “You are supposed to be on my side, you are my best friend!”

“Yes, but the only way I can stay your best friend is if I maintain the ability to say no to you. We would likely be dead by now if I hadn’t developed the very useful talent of being completely unaffected by your big blue eyes, pouty lips, and fluttering lashes.”

“We would not! You take that back. When have I EVER purposely endangered our lives?!”

He grimaced when her face remained expressionless, while her right brow slowly rose… Ohh…maybe he should have asked that in a different way.

“No, wait, don’t answer that! Answer this… when have I endangered our lives to the point we were actually in danger of dying?”

Turney started to laugh. “Octavius, I think you lost just by the fact that you had to rephrase that.”

“Lost?!” he cried. “I can’t lose before she even answers the question!”

Min-ji scoffed. “I feel the real question is, what were the things she said no to, when there were still things that did in fact endanger you two?”

“Witch trials,” Scarlett mused, answering his question not hers.

Octavius flinched. Oh…he’d forgotten about that one. “It…was…just…a little fire…”

It had not been just a little fire… But they survived! Got a little singed, is all… Well, a lot singed… Way too much singed…

“Witch trials,” Turney rasped softly, for some reason. “As in…”

“To be clear, no actual witch, to my knowledge, was burned in the trials,” Min-ji said softly. “Or really any trial for being a witch.”

Scarlett sighed. “Not the trials, there was just a set of them in a town that doesn’t exist anymore.”

Octavius whined and tried to defend himself, as really it was not his fault! “To be fair, it was just supposed to be a fun, chaotic little trick on some dumb villagers! Dumb villagers, who were not good people, by the way, as they were literally burning wise women for being wise. And furthermore, said trick technically wasn’t even my idea, it was Catalina’s.”

His best friend snorted. “Yes, that was the moment I realized that Catalina lacked as much sense as you.”

He gasped. “I am being slandered! By my own friends and boyfriend.” Octavius glared, popping his bottom lip out in a pout. “Attacked! I am unfairly being attacked.” He turned around, pouting more fiercely.

On meeting the gaze of the human standing in front of him, he glared. The man slowly turned away, avoiding his eyes. Stupid human…stupid line…mean friends—hmph!

After being slammed into from behind, Turney let out a startled laugh as he bounced into and off the wall of the fake river, ricocheting against a grouping of plants, before finally spinning through a waterfall and coming to a stop a few feet after it.

Octavius, the one who’d rammed into him, continued to giggle manically. The menace zoomed past him in his own motorized duck innertube thing, heading towards a group of strangers. He chuckled, shaking his head as the man plowed into them, sending the four people off in all directions.

Turney had to admit, he was having fun. And while a few people had looked over, most didn’t outright stare, even when they’d been walking around or waiting in line. A few kids had, but…maybe the scars weren’t as noticeable as his head screamed they were.

He glanced over at the sound of movement, finding Scarlett and Min-ji next to him. “Pouting no longer, I see,” his sire sighed.

Turney smiled. “Nothing keeps his mood down for long, that’s for sure.”

It was…one of the things he loved about the man. Octavius viewed the world in an almost child-like wonder. Not that he didn’t know the horrors of it, but he always seemed to be able to push past it all and see the good and fun side of it.

Turney chuckled softly as he watched Octavius somehow manage to angle himself just right, so he could ricochet off one man, and cause a chain reaction that sent him bouncing into all of the others again.

“Sap,” Scarlett said in a tone that was a mix of affection and…disgust.

“Should we go rescue the poor humans he is harassing?” Min-ji asked, sounding bored.

“Nah, let him have fun… No one is crying or yelling, so…it should be fine,” he mused.

This was safe and contained chaos, so…why bother stopping his fun?

“Better them than us,” Scarlett stated blankly.

He glanced over, the water had pushed them both further away from him. He slowly grinned, and without hesitating, he tilted both of his joy sticks and bumped into Scarlett at full speed. Changing direction, he zoomed away laughing, while she and Min-ji squawked as they slammed right into each other.

“TURNEY!” Scarlett growled.

Octavius looked up at the sound of her voice, but not in time to avoid Turney. He let out a triumphant laugh as he sent the vampire spinning off.

“WHEE!” Octavius giggled happily as he spun away.

Once the vampire had stopped spinning, they stared at each other for a brief moment across the distance. Turney saw the spark of mischief in Octavius’ eyes…and reacting to it, he sped toward the man. Octavius moved at the same time, their speeds matching as they hit. They both burst into laughter as they bounced and twirled away, water splashing around them.

His laughter dwindled to a chuckle as he stopped, eyeing Octavius. The man, smiling widely, slowly approached this time. “Well, that was fun!” The vampire giggled. “But…I’m bored!”

“I’m surprised you were entertained for this long.”

“Well, the time limit is thirty minutes! I had to at least make it worth that annoyingly long wait!”

“It was ten minutes, Octavius. That’s barely considered a wait, amusement park wise.”

Turney was actually impressed that the wait timer had been accurate.

“Long enough! Come on, I want to go on the big slide!” the vampire cried dramatically, before cutely saying, “And then the little one…and then the medium sized one. Three bears order, before going back to the big one!”

“Three bears order, huh?” He chuckled.

“Yes!” Octavius nodded, before he leaned over in his innertube and snagged hold of the side of his. The vampire chanting, “Let’s go, let’s go!” as he started to steer them towards one of the docks out of the river.

“Octavius, what about Scarlett and Min-ji?”

“SCARLETT, MIN-JI, BIG SLIDE!” Octavius bellowed, ever so ‘informatively’.

He snorted, shaking his head, but he just let the man tug him along, listening when he started to ramble on about the big slide.