Chapter 22

CHAPTER 22

RYDER

T he emergency motion was denied. In a brief order, the judge said that no exigent circumstances existed to justify an emergency. What had occurred last night didn't rise to the level that necessitated court interference.

Boone had explained it to me, but it wasn't sinking in. The only conclusion I could draw was that Stacy got away with it. That she could continue to do whatever she wanted, and this was her permission to do so.

Boone was apologetic, but it wasn't his call. I understood that there were more pressing matters out there.

"You have two options: you can do nothing and continue as things are, or you can withdraw your original separation agreement and negotiate a new one.

"What would you suggest?" I asked him. My body was weary from the lack of sleep, and my brain wasn't functioning.

Boone inclined his head. "It's up to you. I know how badly you want the divorce to be final, to be done with Stacy. You only have a few more days to go until the final hearing."

"I'll never be done with her." We shared a daughter. She was going to play games for a long time. As long as people let her get away with it.

"Or you can threaten to withdraw the separation agreement, opening up the custody issue for more negotiations. Her move out of the family home would be reason enough."

"I want the divorce to be final. But I don't think I have a choice. I have to do something. She can't continue to upend Faith's life whenever she gets a new boyfriend."

"Her attorney said Stacy wants to get married as soon as possible. They don't want to do anything to derail the divorce proceedings."

"She wants the divorce to be final." I waited for the familiar hurt to take hold in my chest, but it didn't come. I wanted the same.

"Her attorney shouldn't have told me that, because now we have a bargaining chip. The question is what do you want?"

"More time with Faith." That was easy.

"Do you want the house, or do you want to force the sale and then distribution of the proceeds? If you lived here, fifty-fifty custody would be possible."

If I could have everything? "I want primary custody of Faith. I want her to live with me and go to school in Maryland."

"That's a big ask. It could be a long battle. Are you prepared for that?"

My jaw tightened. It meant being married to Stacy for longer, but, "If she wants to get married, won't she be motivated to give me something to move things along?"

"She'll argue that we could still finalize the divorce and request a change in custody afterward."

"You said that it's easier to hash out these details now. After its final, it's more difficult to make changes. The judge could say no."

"That's right. If you're okay with it, let's withdraw the custody agreement based on her move out of the family home." He held up a hand. "But I have to warn you that anything can happen. You're not guaranteed to get what you have now if this goes to court."

"Does it matter that Faith wants to live with me?" I asked.

"It's a factor the judge could consider. But her mother could influence her to say anything."

I let out a breath. "I have to try."

"Think about whether you want to live in the house. It would make everything easier."

My chest tightened at the thought. "Will do."

"I'll be in touch, and for what it's worth, I think you're doing the right thing."

"I would have regretted not taking a stance on this." Stacy couldn't be allowed to do whatever she wanted without considering Faith's feelings. I had to at least try. Otherwise, she was going to walk all over me for years to come.

I hung up with Boone, wandering the home I'd lived in during the marriage. There wasn't anything here that felt like mine. Stacy had picked the furniture, the artwork on the walls, even chose which pictures of our family hung in the hallway.

I was in some of them, but I didn't look happy. We were together because of Faith, and that wasn't fair for anyone.

I'd already taken a few days off work, thinking I'd have to go to court and deal with moving my things. Since there wasn't going to be a hearing, I had nothing to fill my time with.

I decided to go through the house to make sure there was nothing of mine still here.

A few hours later, there was a knock on the front door. I almost thought it could be Stacy showing up to rage at me. But when I opened the door, I was surprised to see that it was Dad.

I opened the door wider for him. "What are you doing here?"

His forehead creased as he stepped inside. "I wanted to check on you."

"I'm fine," I said as I closed the door behind him. The sky was overcast, similar to my mood.

Dad followed me into the kitchen where I poured him some coffee. I slid the mug across the counter toward him. "It's weird being here, huh?" he said.

"I'm not sure you spent any time here, other than when we initially moved in."

"I think that was the last time Stacy invited us." Dad shrugged like it wasn't a big deal when we both knew it was.

"I'm sorry I let her influence pull me away from you and the family. It wasn't right, and it took me a long time to see that."

"I don't blame you for anything. We missed you, and that was that. You're home now."

I let out a shaky breath, not sure how to tell him.

"You're thinking of moving back," Dad said flatly.

I shrugged. "The house is empty. I have a better chance of getting custody if I'm here."

Dad tightened his grip on the mug. "And what about what you want?"

My throat tightened. "I don't know what that is anymore. I want Faith to be taken care of. I don't want her moving from place to place. If I'm here, it will be more stable for her."

Dad raised a brow. "What about how happy you've bene living in Maryland? What about Violet?"

My chest tightened further at the mention of Violet. I'd been trying not to think of her at all. If I factored her into the equation, I wouldn't be standing in my marital home. "Faith is the only one I should be thinking about."

"What about your happiness?" Dad asked me.

"It's all tied up in Faith."

Dad shifted on his feet. "Is it though? Because from where I'm standing, you look miserable."

I felt like shit too, but I wasn't going to admit that he was right. "Things didn't go my way in court this morning. But Faith's well-being is the only thing that should matter."

"Correct me if I'm wrong, but wasn't Faith happy staying with you in Maryland where she can be close to her cousins and the rest of the family?"

I nodded tightly. "That's true."

"Why don't you ask her what she wants? I have a feeling it's not living here with you. She liked the version of her dad that lives in Maryland."

I closed my eyes. Had I been a different person? Was I more open to life and what made me happy? I thought about my morning runs when I'd see George, meeting Violet again for the first time, helping her scoop ice cream at the holiday festival. I was happy there in a way I'd never been in this house.

If I stayed here, would it be more of the same? Would Stacy actually have a tighter hold on my life? Would she continue to play these games, pushing the boundaries? Wouldn't it be better if I stayed in Maryland where I had the support of my family? "You might be right."

Dad gestured at the kitchen. "What does Violet think about all this?"

"I don't know. We haven't talked much." I told her about the emergency motion when we'd talked on the phone. But there hadn't been much interaction otherwise. I was afraid I'd ended things with the way I'd concluded our conversation last night. "She can't move here. She has a shop in Maryland."

"That's not what I'm talking about, and you know it. You haven't even talked to her about this, have you?"

Did he know? Had Violet talked to Daphne? "I did."

"But you haven't included her in the decision," Dad persisted, and I felt an itchy sensation on my skin.

I grabbed the back of my neck. "What's there to talk about? This is about Faith."

"If you want a life with Violet, you have to include her. You're not alone anymore."

Then why did I feel more alone than ever?

Dad's jaw tightened. "You didn't call any of us, and you're not talking to Violet."

"What's your point?" I asked with more force than necessary.

"You have a lot of people who want to support you. But you're isolating yourself just like you did in your marriage. Except this time, you can't blame it on Stacy. You're doing this all on your own." Dad threw up his hands.

I braced my hands on the counter and let my head hang between my shoulders. Was he right? Is that what I was doing?

"We want to be there for you." Dad's reminder was comforting.

"I appreciate that. But I have to figure out what would be best for Faith." I couldn't deny that me living here would be the ideal scenario. She was familiar with the house and where she'd be the most comfortable. But I didn't want to live here. It felt like I was taking a step back just being here for a day.

Dad gave me a pointed look. "Is this really what you want?"

I let out a breath. "It's weird being here."

Dad's brow furrowed. "Don't you think it will be the same for Faith?"

I swallowed hard. If I moved into the family home, it would make what Stacy did okay. I'd be cleaning up after her mess. In Maryland, I was getting a fresh start, and Dad was right. I was happy there. "I figured I'd have to break things off with Violet. It wouldn't be fair to her to continue a long-distance relationship when she couldn't move."

"You want to break things off with her?"

I thought about the last few weeks with Violet, how she'd been there for me and Faith, and how much fun I had when I was with her. "No."

"I'm not here to tell you what to do?—"

"You're not here to talk some sense into me?" I asked incredulously.

"I just want you to be happy, and I don't think you would be if you moved back here."

"I don't think I realized it at the time, but I was miserable in this house. Being here brought everything back. I worked so much because I didn't want to be around Stacy. I felt pushed out in a way. She made all the decisions."

"What are you doing now?"

I let go of the counter. "Making all the decisions without talking to Faith or Violet."

Dad nodded as if he was satisfied with my line of thought. "You got some food in that fridge? I'm starving."

I let out a laugh. "We're going to have to go out or order in."

We ordered in and ended up eating at the kitchen table. The one I barely spent any time at. I usually ate at the counter or on my way to or from work. This place wasn't a home for me. I was building one in Maryland with my family and Violet.

I'd screwed things up with Violet. "What if it's too late?"

Dad scrubbed a hand over his beard. "You mean, because you pushed Violet away?"

I nodded, feeling uneasy.

"I don't think it's ever too late. But you have to convince her you're including her in your present and your future."

"How can I do that?" I asked, not quite believing I was taking relationship advice from my father. He'd been happy with mom, but he hadn't moved on or dated anyone since. Not that me or my brothers knew of anyway.

Dad chewed thoughtfully before he answered, "Charlotte said she's helping Violet with the store."

"She hired Charlotte?" That was something she hadn't mentioned to me at all, but I was impressed she had.

"She wants to increase brand awareness and stand out from all the ice-cream shops in town. Charlotte has some solid ideas."

"That was a good move." I was impressed with Violet's tenacity.

Dad nodded. "I think so too."

"What is she planning for the store?"

Dad went through the various options, and I couldn't let go of one. They were going to write a story about her shop in the paper. It would be in the lifestyle section, but still, that was great exposure. What if I added something to it? Something that told her I wanted to be part of her life in a big way?

"You think the reporter will talk to me?" I asked him.

Dad grinned. "I think she'll love this angle. And so will Charlotte."

"Teddy won't like that I'm working with Charlotte."

Dad shook his head. "I wouldn't worry about him."

Soon Axel would be home, and I wanted to be part of that. I wanted all the Calloways to finally be together. "This feels like the right decision." I was excited in a way I hadn't been in a long time.

"Then you know you're on the right track."

"I need to talk to Faith and get things settled here first before I come back." The house would need to be sold. I needed to make sure there wasn't anything left here that was mine. Or that there was something Faith would want later. That meant going through the attic and the garage.

"I wouldn't expect anything less. I know Charlotte is planning an event at the ice-cream shop this weekend to coincide with the article in the paper. Maybe that would be a good time for you to make your move."

For the first time in a while, I felt like I was making an intentional step forward. Life wasn't happening to me. I was creating one I wanted with the woman I loved.

I felt like I had been holding back in my relationship with Violet, afraid to take the next step because of Stacy. But my ex didn't get to have that kind of hold over my life anymore. I just hoped I wasn't too late.