Chapter 9

9

JAXON

Lyric and Micah have a beautiful baby boy. Gunnar Angel Monroe. Weighing in at four pounds and two ounces. And he’s fifteen-and one-half inches long. He’s small but he’s mighty. I was on such a high that I needed to share it with someone. I knew exactly who that would be after listening to her voicemail. It was a long overdue reunion but worth the wait.

The kiss at her front doorstep was a big act for the paps still hanging around me, but the way she pulled me in, I didn’t have the heart to burst her bubble. I’m all about keeping up pretenses and public displays of affection, but behind closed doors, I’m not so sure. My heart won’t survive. I’m still picking up the pieces if I’m being honest, and Aria is someone who is so easy to love. I’m not quite there yet, but who knows what the future holds?

I’m a man of my word and I’ll see it through however long it takes. Our goal was to take the heat off, so she could do her job without all the jealous bullies talking smack about her abilities. Once the heat dies down, we can go our separate ways. Until then, I’m in it all the way.

Caleb was kind enough to give us a few days off. So I have all this time on my hands with nothing to do. I’d much rather practice, so I decide to go into the studio and play while I have the time. After I can shower and make dinner for Aria since she promised to be here after work. We still need to figure out when we’re going to talk to our parents before they get too suspicious.

The minute I sit behind my kit, the adrenaline automatically kicks in. Grabbing my sticks, I start playing. There’s no rhyme or reason to what I’m playing, and it’s certainly not one of our songs, but I’m doing a solo, highlighting my skills and not a soul is around to hear it. Shame, since it’s one of the best solos I’ve ever done. Now I wish I had recorded it so I could play it back and try mimicking it. Too late now, so I let my hands guide me. Only stopping when I’m out of breath, sore and in need of a break.

When I wipe the sweat from my eyes, I’m rattled to see my sister standing there. Holding a key in her hand and a frown on her face. She’s pissed. Really pissed. Obviously, Zander’s such a good friend that he didn’t tell his wife that my engagement was fake. My dilemma is, do I tell her the truth? If I do will Mom and Jim know? Yep, best for her to hate me for not telling her the truth somewhere down the road.

“I knocked and when you didn’t answer, I got worried. So I used my key. I’m thrilled to see you’re okay, but by the time I’m finished with you, that might be debatable. You have some explaining to do and don’t bullshit me.” Now do you understand why I was reluctant to tell my family?

“Hello to you too, sis. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I need to shower before we have this conversation. Go make yourself comfortable.” I wouldn’t put it past her to snoop in my cupboards and drawers to look for signs of Aria in the house. Panties, toothbrush, shoes, favorite foods. Why am I just thinking of those things now? Because I had no idea she would invade my fucking privacy. That’s why.

“Oh no you don’t. Get your ass in here. Now. I want the truth from your lips before you go running into the shower to conjure up all kinds of lies, lies, lies, because I caught you red-handed.”

“It’s non-negotiable, Mel. Now sit down or stand up, I really don’t care. I’ll be back in five or you can come and get me.” My only hope is that she doesn’t call Aria while I’m in the shower. Otherwise, our stories might not jive. In fact, I know they won’t.

I’m showered and dressed with twenty seconds to spare when I saunter into the living room. She’s sitting on the sofa, scrolling through her phone. No doubt checking out all the pictures on social media my ex posted.

“If you’re engaged to another woman, then explain why you came to our house so upset that you grabbed a bat and stormed out the door to hit a grand slam into the lake. Judge Judy always said, “If it doesn’t make sense, it’s usually not true.” Well, fuck.

“Did you ever stop to think that I might have been with the wrong sister all along? Maybe I’ve been in love with Aria all this time and just realized it that night? That I’ve wasted all these years trying to be someone I’m not? Why should I continue to please Stephanie when Aria loves me for who I am? Sis, I thought you of all people would understand. You’ve been in love with Zander from the start and I’ve been in love with Aria, too. You girls were too young back then, but you’ve both grown into beautiful, caring women and the reason us crazy men have fallen head over heels for you.” Wow, I amaze myself sometimes. Even she’s getting a bit teary eyed.

“Have you been in love with her all this time? Because I’m not totally convinced. I’ve never witnessed you so manic as you were that night. You really scared me, Jax. I was petrified.” Oh man, now I feel like a complete jerk.

I stroll over to the sofa and sit beside her. Grabbing her hand, I confess. “When she told me she didn’t love me anymore, I realized I was no longer in love with her either. And truth be told, I was angry that she had the balls to end it first. Her engagement ring had been sitting in my safe for three years. Had I really wanted to commit to her, I’d have given it to her a long time ago. Something or someone was stopping me, and that someone was Aria.” Holy shit. Is that true or did my imagination just conjure up that random fact?

“If you’re really in love with Aria, why propose right away? Surely you could have waited until the dust settled and old wounds healed before taking another leap. Or making another mistake.” This could make it or break it, but worth a try.

“I decided to propose that night because a couple of coworkers from Glamify magazine needed a fucking wake up call. The look on their faces was priceless, and now Aria can go to work without a care in the world.”

ARIA

Imagine my surprise when I pop over to Jax’s house after work and he’s excited to tell me all about his sister’s visit. He barely waits until I get inside before blurting everything out.

“I’m telling you, it’s foolproof. Mel isn’t easily fooled and I’m positive she believed every word. Our parents and friends want the truth, right? This is the closest to the truth as we can get. Am I a genius or what?” I hate to burst his bubble, but he’s forgetting one very important detail. Stephanie. She was at the gala that night and there’s that little, tiny incident with Trent that I haven’t mentioned to Jax yet. I was waiting for the right time and that might be now.

“Did Mel ask about my coworkers or why I can go to work without a care? I hope not because I really don’t want to go into detail about what’s going on there. Especially now that my sister is dating Trent. Who, by the way, paid me a little visit at work the other day.”

“The fuck? What did he want and why are you just telling me now?” Ah, because I was avoiding you.

“He’s been in and out of the office since the gala, no big deal. Until he stopped by to congratulate me on my engagement, then mentioned he’d see me again since we run in the same circles. What do you think he meant by that? I suppose he could be referring to my sister or the magazine. Maybe he has no clue that you and Stephanie dated for years.” Wishful thinking on my part.

“It’s a possibility but highly unlikely. Exes usually come up in a conversation at some point. Although Stephanie and I weren’t very vocal about our relationship. Her wishes since she didn’t want to be in the public eye. There might be a few pictures of us floating around the net but nothing recent. We’re so busy worrying about the other shoe dropping… but maybe nothing will happen. Maybe she’s so happy with the shiny new man that she won’t retaliate. Or she’s waiting for the right moment. Like a holiday, or our wedding.”

“There’s not going to be a wedding, Jax. Do I need to remind you that this is fake? Fake engagement. Fake relationship. Everything is fake.” I’m seriously losing my mind, and I just unintentionally hurt him. It’s written all over his face. “Sorry, it sounded harsh and that wasn’t my intention.”

“No, you’re right. Everything’s fake and we’re just playing dress up. Make sure to inform me when it’s all over in case I miss the memo. Dinner’s almost ready.” With that he abruptly stands up and walks into the kitchen. Open mouth, insert foot.

Touching him is dangerous since I get caught up in the feels when I do, but I can’t leave it like this.

He’s stirring something on the stove when I walk in, so I saunter up behind him and wrap my arms around him. Resting my cheek against his back. He smells like soap, citrus, and sandalwood. It’s so familiar that memories from the past come flooding back. I’ve known this man forever. He’s ingrained into my life. For better or worse, whether we’re married or not.

“I’m so sorry, Jax. You’ve been so patient and understanding and I’ve been so nasty that I don’t recognize myself anymore. In case I haven’t mentioned it lately, I appreciate all that you’ve done for me.”

After taking the pan off the burner, he turns around and wraps his arms around me. “Maybe I don’t know what’s real and what’s fake anymore, poppet. What if I’m not playing a part? What if I was with the wrong sister all these years?” He can’t be serious.

“I’m not a child anymore. I’m all grown up. And I can’t have a normal conversation with the only man who’s been in my life almost as long as my dad.” Not sure why that makes me so emotional. “We’re both confused and trying to navigate right from wrong. Lines are blurred. Maybe we need to take a step back.”

“If this still feels wrong to you baby, then I don’t want to be right. Ever again.” When he licks his lips, electricity runs through my veins. My nerve endings spark to life and I’m desperate for him to touch me. He feels it too. Whether right or wrong, it’s up to us to decide.

“Dinner’s getting cold,” I mumble with a heavy heart. This is the step back that I just mentioned. It would have been so easy to take it to the next level. I’m determined to be the voice of reason, even if my body calls to his.

“Coming right up.” It’s sad how easily we can both switch gears. Turn off our feelings or set them aside for the greater good. Am I afraid? Absolutely, because in my heart of hearts, Jax could be clinging to me for a variety of reasons. One, he’s using me to make Stephanie jealous, so she’ll come back to him. Or he’s not ready to let go of the past life he’s been living for over fifteen years.

“Smells delicious. I’ll set the table.” We work in reflective silence. Both lost in our own thoughts. I can’t help wondering if he’s tired of the push and pull we got going on. I know I am. And I’m speechless when I sit at the table and realize he made chicken marsala. My absolute favorite.

“Tomorrow, we need to rip off the Band-Aid and talk to our parents. Once and for all. Do you want to call them or should I?” I can barely swallow my first bite at the thought of lying to all of them, but we’ve come this far, so we need to finish what we started.