Chapter 25

25

JAXON

I’m so frustrated since I still haven’t found a venue for the wedding, and we’re leaving in five days. Now I know what it’s like to want to pull the hair out of my head because I’m at my wits’ end. Aria’s going to be heartbroken if I can’t come up with something by the time she gets here later today.

We’ve been spending as much time together as we possibly can since she still hasn’t agreed to meet me on a leg of the tour. I’m going to be lost and lonely without her. The nights will fly by, but the days will drag and the travel is going to be horrendous. I won’t be back in New York until the middle of September. We have a hiatus of five days every three months. I’m not the only one bitching, the guys have joined in. It’s going to be rough being on the road when our families are back home.

Focus, Jax. Focus. I need to call a few other venues while I have the time. There’s no sense dwelling on eventually what will be. Touring is part of our job, and we need to suck it up.

Dialing Roman’s number, I wait. He’s going to get so fucking sick and tired of me. I hate pissing him off, but I have no choice. It’s do or die time.

“Jax, bugging the shit out of me on the daily isn’t going to win you any brownie points, if you get my drift.” Doesn’t he sound like a peach? In his defense, he’s been working hard trying to find me a place, too.

“Just checking in to find out if anything new popped up today.” If I was a kid, I’d be crossing my fingers and toes right about now, but I’m a grown-ass man so best not.

“Nothing yet, but I’m waiting on a few calls. They promised to get back to me sometime today. I promise to call you as soon as I get an answer. Good or bad.” Is it possible to get an ulcer at thirty? I think I got one.

“Thanks, Roman. I know you’re pulling some strings, and I really appreciate it. It’s just that we’re running out of time.”

“I know, but don’t give up. Hell, something might come up while you’re on tour.” True, but I’d rest easier if it was all settled before leaving.

“I know. ‘Never give up’ is your motto, right?” He chuckles and God how I wish I could. I don’t find anything funny anymore.

“Gotta go. Hang tight, I’ll call you later.” When he ends the call, I listen to the incessant beep. Or what I like to call the mic drop.

Desperate to take my mind off of everything, I decide to go work out for a while. Which is something I haven’t done in quite some time. All the guys have been bitching at me that I’m not building up my stamina. Well, if they could see me and Aria going at it every night they might change their tune. Scratch that. No way in fucking hell I want them watching me. Otherwise, they’d be a bunch of jealous bastards and there wouldn’t be any living with them on the road.

I know I should concentrate on my upper body, but today I want to run. Like the fucking wind. Stripping off my clothes, I slip into my shorts and step on the treadmill. After selecting the preprogrammed workout, I step on the side bars. Then I hit start.

Within minutes, my heart rate speeds up and I’m running like the wind on a mountain trail. Yeah, I have a visual on this bad boy. Up, up, and up I go while my arms pump back and forth. My legs feel the burn. I’m panting like a fool, and it feels fucking incredible. Sweat streams down all my nooks and crannies like rivulets flowing through a stream. As soon as the screen pans downhill, I know it’s smooth sailing until the next interval. Giving me a much-needed reprieve.

I concentrate on the gorgeous view since I forgot to put on my headset so I could listen to one of my playlists. It doesn’t matter since I also forgot to grab some water. So I’m not sure how much longer I can do this without hydrating. Until I pass out, I suppose. Just kidding.

With thirty minutes to go, I’m out of breath and dying of thirst, so I jump up on the sides and shut it off. Crazy how it stops instantly and would send you flying over the screen. Which would send me headfirst into my weights. Ouch.

For a few minutes, I just stand there, trying to catch my breath. I’m desperate for water, but I know if I move, I might fall flat on my face. Need to give it a few more. Since I didn’t have a cool down, I do a few stretches. Until I feel comfortable enough to start moving. And when I do, I go straight to the fridge and grab a cold bottle of water. I know, I can’t drink it fast. I just need something wet. Taking a sip, I swish it around before swallowing. That way the water’s warm going down instead of cold. Not my first rodeo.

After finishing the water, I grab a clean towel and wipe myself down. God, I def need another shower before Aria gets here. No way she’d get close to me smelling the way I do. Since I feel gross, I decide to get it over with since I can’t stand the stench.

Jumping in the shower, I let the warmth of the water sluice down my body before grabbing my body wash. Scrubbing from head to toe, I wash away all the sweat before washing my hair. Ducking under the spray, I watch the shampoo glide down my abs, legs, and feet before circling the drain and disappearing. Shutting off the water, I grab a towel and quickly dry off the best I can before walking into my bedroom. Now I feel like a hundred bucks. Throwing on an old concert T and a pair of sweatpants. No, not the gray ones that all the guys on social media wear. I might be a metal head, but I’m classier than that.

Walking into the kitchen I grab my phone and see I had a missed call from Roman. I quickly hit redial, totally ignoring his voicemail. When he doesn’t answer, I hang up and listen to his message.

“I’ll call you later to go into detail, but tell Aria she’s going to make a beautiful September bride in New York.” Fuck yes!!!

ARIA

Going to Jaxon’s house is bittersweet, knowing we don’t have much time. He’ll be leaving soon and since I haven’t heard from him today, I’m going to assume that he struck out again. In truth, I thought it would be so easy to find a venue, but I wasn’t considering the time of year and all the red tape involved. Not only that, most venues aren’t equipped for a nontraditional wedding like we want so they flat out said no. Maybe they thought we were pranking them but that’s the furthest thing from the truth. If we don’t hear from someone soon, I’ll need to go to plan B.

Pulling into his drive, I put on my happy face. Jax feels terrible and hates the thought of letting me down. There’s no point in being upset. For now, I want to spend all of our time making love and being close to him. There’s plenty of time to have a pity party once he leaves.

Nowadays, I just knock and walk right in. He told me it was stupid to knock and wait until he answered the door.

“Honey, I’m home.” It’s how I greet him every time I come over.

“In the kitchen, baby.” Not his usual but he likes switching things up.

“Someone felt like cooking. Smells delicious.” I’m not only going to miss his culinary skills, but I’m also going to miss his amazing bedroom skills too.

Walking around the counter, he meets me halfway. Leaning in, with his hands on my hips, he gives me a kiss that instantly curls my toes. “Mm, you taste good enough to eat,” I purr.

“That’s dessert. I’ve made you chicken marsala for dinner.” What? My favorite. The rockstar-slash-chef walks to the stove and stirs the sauce.

“Aw, you’re so sweet, Jax. Thank you.” I try not to get teary eyed because God knows how long it will be before he cooks it for me again.

“How did work go today?” It’s a running joke between us since I’m still working from home. I’ve learned to go with the flow instead of complaining. I’m sure when Silas is ready, he’ll call me back. I just miss chatting with him about baking, too.

“Good. I finished my article and sent it over. Oh my god. Did you pierce your eyebrow? When did you do that and why would you do that?” He’s laughing as he looks over his shoulder, wiggling his eyebrows at me.

“Do you think it makes me look sexy?” Fuck yes and now I’m more worried about the damn groupies than ever before.

“You were hot before but you’re even hotter now. If that’s even possible. I like it. Gives you that bad boy drummer vibe to match your tats.”

He doesn’t have a ton like Ace and Zander, but I love the ones he does have. He has the Rebel Riot logo on his right arm which begins at the shoulder and ends at the elbow. Wicked cool with all the colors and the skull and chains. On his left forearm he has a quote, “The goal isn’t to live forever, the goal is to create something that will.” The last one is between his shoulder blades. It’s a beautiful, intricate cross outlined in black with shades of blue that has the birth date and date of death of his stepbrother Ezra. Who was killed by a drunk driver around three years ago. He’s Jim’s son and was the drummer for Reckless Melody.

“Today. It was a bet that I made with Ace. As you can see, I lost.” I can’t help it, but I just start laughing. When will he ever learn? You don’t make a bet unless it’s a done deal.

“I’m afraid to ask what the bet was all about. Never mind, I don’t want to know.”

“Nah, this time it was legit. We bet who was going to pull into the parking lot next, is all. No biggie. This bet was harmless, baby. Besides, I kinda like the piercing.”

“It’s hot as fuck. Maybe you should have a lip piercing like Zander.” Taking the pan off the stove, he crooks his finger, beckoning me to come to him. What’s his deal?

Standing toe to toe, he wraps his hand around my nape, pulling me in. His warm breath, sending shivers down my spine.

“Have I ever mentioned, when you drop the F bomb, my cock gets hard?” Oh my. Nope, can’t say I do.

His smoldering gaze is locked on mine, and I have the sudden urge to check just to be sure. Licking my lips, I whisper, “No, I didn’t know.”

“Well, you do now. I had so many plans for us tonight, baby. But all I want to do now is sink deep inside of your sweet pussy and stay there until it’s time for me to leave.” Just the reminder that we’re on borrowed time terrifies me.

“I’m not opposed to that. There’s no place else I’d rather be than in your bed.” He struggles to breathe as he leans his head against mine.

“Fuck, Aria. This is the first time ever that I don’t want to go on tour. Being with you these last six months is the happiest I’ve ever been. Please, I’m begging you. Come on tour with me, please. I don’t think I can do this without you.” I’ve never seen him so distraught before. Not even when Stephanie broke up with him.

“Jax, you know I’d love to…” His lips crash down on mine before I have a chance to use the word ‘but’. I understand that’s not what he needs to hear right now. He was vulnerable and transparent, and I just can’t give him what he wants.

Not right now.

When he hastily breaks the kiss, I feel his pain deep down inside my soul. I’m hurting, too, but he’s the one that’s leaving, and I’ll still be surrounded by my family and friends.

Other than the band, he’ll be alone.

“Let’s eat before it gets cold.” I’m at a loss for words because no matter what I say at this point in time, it will never be enough.

My career has always been my number one priority, but now I’m engaged to the man I love. Maybe it’s time to get my priorities straight. Could I still work while out on the road with him? Am I just being selfish when he’s willing to do whatever it takes to make this relationship work?