21. Weston

CHAPTER 21

Like anyone who wanted to share a romantic relationship with someone someday, Weston had spent years daydreaming about how good it would feel when someone finally confessed their love for him. In the Disney movie of his life, all his problems were solved upon his suitor revealing their feelings.

In practice, as good as it felt to have Quinn tell him that he loved him, it also felt a little terrible.

Being in Quinn's world—with his family, and Hunter, and his house, his life, his habits—was overwhelming. When Quinn came up to see him, the two of them were in a bubble of a studio apartment. It was focused. Weston built his days around Quinn. In Minneapolis, Quinn had this full, giant life filled with love and trust and professional sports.

What on earth could Weston offer him in return? A lifetime of the saddest-tasting bread in the world? A time-consuming and some would say juvenile occupation that might end at any time? Sexual preferences that he knew left some wanting?

He spent his Saturday after he got home wallowing. Quinn texted him a lot, sending him photos and messages about how much he missed him. Weston missed him back.

He texted Sienna to let her know he was back in town, and she insisted on hanging out. They went to the cheap theater that only played the movies that had already left regular theaters, and they ended up the only two seeing a way too long Marvel movie.

"You don't look as happy as I thought you would," she said, as the pre-movie "entertainment" played on the screen.

"I am happy." He picked at his chipping nail polish. His words sounded lackluster even to him.

"I've never been less convinced."

"He told me he loves me."

"What? And you're not over the moon? Quinn is literally all you talk about."

"I'm just freaking out."

"I see that." She pulled a bag of gummy worms from her purse and ripped it open, taking a couple and then passing the bag to Weston.

"What if I fuck this up? What if I'm not good enough for him? What happens when he gets bored of me? What if this is all too good to be true? The worst feeling is what if we break up and my stream views crash? It's an awful thing to mash into my feelings for him."

"You are such a charming asshole that you regularly have a thousand people watch you play a video game that is so boring it makes me want to cry."

"Hey."

"I'm just saying that maybe there would be a bit of a dip if you broke up, but you'd bounce back. You're fun. But I don't think that's going to happen. I haven't met Quinn but I've seen some of the clips you post to TikTok with him, and I am not at all surprised that he loves you. The way he looks at you is gross."

"Yeah?"

"Babe, I know dating with chronic illness isn't exactly a walk in the park, but I can smell a red flag from a thousand miles away, and this man doesn't have any of them."

Weston picked at the skin around his nails. He'd stopped biting them when he'd started painting them, but it just displaced his bad habit instead of curing it.

"Do you love him too?"

"I think so."

"But you haven't told him."

"No."

"That man confessed his love to you, you didn't return it, and he's still been blowing up your phone all day? Trying to convince you to stay with him instead of coming home?"

"I know this sounds really fucking pathetic, but shockingly, I don't fit in with his family as seamlessly as the people who have been in his life for a thousand years. I'm jealous of his best friend, I think."

"Does he make eyes at the best friend?"

"No. And his best friend is dating his brother."

"Okay. So he's not a problem."

"He did a lot to help make Thanksgiving edible for me."

"I think you're being a little unreasonable."

"No way," Weston said. He consciously dropped his shoulders that had been nearly up to his ears he was so tense. "I think my feelings for him are so big that they're just scaring the shit out of me. I didn't know humans could feel this way."

"I dare you to tell him," Sienna said.

"I will. I promise. Maybe."

"What's the worst that could happen?"

"He could smash my heart into a lot of pieces."

"Love is a gamble. Does being with him feel good enough that you're willing to chance the heartbreak?"

He thought about waking up in Quinn's arms. He thought about Quinn's eyes, and how they always seemed to be on him. How even though they were an established…something…Quinn still made the effort to flirt with him like he was trying to seduce him for the first time. The way he told Weston that he was his muse out of his darkness. Quinn made his heart beat faster. No, Quinn did not solve the problems in his life. But it was better.

"I think so."

"Good. And the movie hasn't even started. Maria Menounos sure has a lot to say today."

"Don't make fun of my girl."