Chapter 19

SITA

I ’m starting to understand—or I hope so.

Gurrek says he’s waiting for my sake, but I think he wants to be sure about me, too. He’s guarding his heart, and I can’t blame him for that. It’s clear that loving me with his body also means loving me with his soul, but he’s held onto it so tightly that it’s hard for him to loosen his grip.

Though our slow progression has set me on edge, his question about younglings today surprised me. I didn’t realize he was thinking about having a family, maybe even with me .

I am enticed by it just as much as I am afraid of it. Am I really what he wants?

And do I want a family here, so far away from my own?

We hold hands all the way home, though we are both quiet. Gurrek wraps an arm around me when I start to shiver, though, and I lean into his touch.

Back at the house, we fetch wood together to stack up by the hearth and start the fire blazing. Gurrek leaves to visit Dakar, and I’m unsettled while he’s gone. Will Dakar mention my visit, and what he said to me? But Gurrek returns only a few minutes later with a paper-wrapped roast and greets me with a soft smile.

The roast will take a long time to cook, so we let it sit over the fire, occasionally rotating it, while we bundle up under blankets in front of the flickering flames. Gurrek braids my hair, pausing from time to time to kiss my neck, and soon I’m buzzing with a slowly growing warmth.

I want to know what he has planned for me tonight.

After dinner, when I’ve finished cleaning the kitchen, I take Gurrek’s hand in mine.

“Show me,” I whisper to him, tugging him towards his bedroom.

His grin is wide and toothy.

“All right.”

This time, I take off all my clothes, including my slip, and Gurrek can’t hide his fascination with my body. I love that he’s attracted to me, that I make his cock hard and hungry. He follows suit, removing everything until he’s gloriously naked in front of me. I’ve never seen him fully disrobed, and I take a long moment to marvel at his body. His chest is full and swollen with strength, his belly undefined but large and powerful. His thighs, too, are broad and thick. His dark green cock hangs down between his legs, but as he looks upon me, taking me in with his eyes, it starts to grow and rise.

I want to lick it, to take it in my mouth and make him spill himself all over me again, but I don’t want to interrupt whatever is on Gurrek’s mind.

He easily scoops me up into his arms, carrying me to the bed, and I cling to his neck with a giggle. He lays me out on top of the blankets and furs, then positions himself on top of me, and for a moment, I think he might finally make me his.

But after kissing me thoroughly, his tongue plundering my mouth, he peels himself away and begins kissing down my throat, to my collarbone and sternum. I love the way he plays with my nipples, cradling each breast as he sucks on them, plucking them gently with his teeth so he never hurts me, only pleasures me. It’s like he’s worshipping them, always taking his time to enjoy them.

Then he kisses circles around my belly, down and down, until I’m twitching and ready for him between my thighs. His hand slides up my leg, pushing it aside to spread me open for him. I gladly do so now, unashamed by what’s there, as Gurrek has proclaimed it “divine” enough times that I believe him.

As he does nearly every night, he licks me with vigor, circling my clit with his tongue until I’m clenching and tense. But before I can find my way up into the sky, where I often find the explosion of pleasure that rattles me down to my bones, Gurrek pauses and brings one hand up to touch me. His finger taunts my bud at first, then slides downward, toward that empty place that he typically ignores.

“Sita,” he says in a firm, serious voice. “This will hurt. I don’t want you to be surprised.”

I blink down at him. “All right.” I prepare myself, as I’ve known for a long time that eventually, it would.

With a nod, Gurrek focuses on his hand’s exploration around my swollen lower lips. Then, one of his fingers dips inside me, and as it tries to slide in deeper, he meets resistance. I try to hold in my gasp as he applies a surprising pressure.

Gurrek strokes my thigh. “Relax, sweetling.” His finger swirls, gathering up all my wetness before he presses again, through what feels like the world’s tiniest hole. He’s much too thick, too bulbous, and I clench at the discomfort.

“Breathe,” my husband whispers, kissing my belly. My legs squeeze together. “You’re doing so well. You’re lovely, Sita. Lovely and beautiful.” I try to listen to his words and open my legs again.

Then, suddenly, he breaks through. I yelp at the sharp bite, but Gurrek holds me fast to the bed.

“I know it hurts, but it will pass,” he murmurs.

Tears pool in my eyes at the burn. Once his finger is seated inside me, he doesn’t move, both of us letting out rapid breaths as the moment passes. I wriggle as my body tries to accommodate him, and then his tongue is upon me once more, swirling around my bud as his finger remains where it is. I try to fall into the pleasure of it, but the sting is too acute.

“Gurrek,” I whimper, reeling my hips back instinctually.

He raises his eyes, peering up at me over my mound. As much as my body longs to be filled, it aches, too, and I can’t separate the pain from the pleasure.

Nodding in understanding, he withdraws his hand.

“You did so well, sweetling.” He kisses the inside of my thigh. “You were wonderful for me.”

Then he resumes licking me, and now that the pressure is gone, I’m able to drift upward, letting everything go until that wave of bliss finally washes over me. It’s small this time, but still satisfying, and Gurrek is careful with his tongue as he laps me up afterward.

I’m panting as he settles next to me, and he smooths his hand down my body, bringing me back down to earth.

“I’m sorry,” he says after a time, his brow furrowed. “I knew it would hurt you?—”

“Shh.” I put a hand over his mouth to quiet him, and I can feel him frown against my palm. “You told me.”

“Yes, but?—”

“ But it will go away.” Even now, the lingering pain is fading, and all I’m left with is a heady contentment.

“Next time will be better,” Gurrek promises, kissing my cheek. “You were wonderful.”

But I don’t want this night to be all about me. While he lies beside me, I explore his body with my hands, reveling in his hard curves and creases, touching every inch of his deep green skin. I want to know all of him.

Soon I grow more adventurous and take his cock in my hand, stroking it the way he likes. Gurrek’s eyes fall closed as I attend to him, squeezing and pulling, moving in a regular rhythm as his breaths speed up. While he’s not looking, I crawl down the bed and take the tip of him into my mouth, and he groans as I combine the pump of my hands with my tongue and lips.

It’s not long before he lets out a deep moan, and squirts directly into my mouth. He tries to pull out, but I keep him there, drinking up his salty spend as more and more of it pours out onto my tongue.

“Sita,” he manages between harsh breaths. “Fuck!”

I smile to myself, pleased that I’ve finally broken his composure. One more harsh pump and he spills yet again, his whole body twitching. I swallow up all I can, luxuriating in him.

When I’ve cleaned my lips, I slide back up so I can look into Gurrek’s yellow eyes, and his pupils are huge and black. He cradles my face in his hands.

“Thank you for this gift,” he says quietly. “You mean so much to me, sweetling.”

I nudge his nose with mine. “As do you to me.”

He tucks me neatly under his chin as he pulls the blankets up over us.

We crossed another barrier tonight, and I can’t wait for the next one.

I’m a little sore the next morning, but the pain has mostly passed. Merka’s pleased to hear that my mouth on Gurrek’s cock has gone over wonderfully.

“You’re well on your way,” she says with a wink as we work the looms. “He’s a hard nut, but you’ll crack him eventually.”

I’m not entirely sure what this means, but I have a hunch, and I hope that she’s right.

“I’m trying to be patient,” I confess. “But we are crawling along like a small bug.”

Merka snorts at this. “That doesn’t surprise me.”

I’m still tender that night, so Gurrek and I settle for licking one another until we’re both sated. When we awake the next morning, though, there’s even more snow outside than before—and it’s falling hard and fast.

“I need to work today,” he grumbles, fetching a shovel from outside so he can scoop away the snow from the path.

I plant my hands on my hips. “Make another one so I can help.”

Gurrek chuckles. “All right, fine. I’ll make another one.” He winks. “Human size.”

I know that means it’ll be smaller than his, and I frown at his back as he steps out into the snow.

When we’re finally able to clear the way, he starts up the forge, and I sit close by to hide from the cold, watching him as he works. I love how his muscles shine with sweat in the firelight, how the steady Thom! Thom! of the metal as he pounds it with his hammer echoes around the room with every swing. I do what I can to help make his work faster, and when he’s finished with two of his orders, I bundle up in my cloak, place the orders in my basket, and head out into the snow to make deliveries.

By the time I return, though, my fingers are like icicles, and my ears are aching. When I stumble into the forge, my teeth chattering, Gurrek jumps up from the anvil and jogs toward me, wrapping me up in his arms.

“You’re freezing!” He growls. “I’m not letting you go out again until we get you something warmer.”

“I’m fine.” I wave him off, blowing hot air on my fingers. “It will just take me a moment to warm up.” Besides, I don’t need him to think I’m weaker than he already does.

I stand near the fire of the forge while Gurrek finishes up for the day. Once he’s tempered the shovel head, he mounts it to a long wooden rod, then holds it up for me to try. It’s heavy, but he’s made it thinner than the other shovel, and it will do for helping to clear away snow. I throw my arms around him, surprising him, but then he embraces me in return.

“Now let’s go home and eat,” he says. “You must be famished from being cold all day.”

I certainly won’t object to some good food, and whatever might follow.