Chapter 28

Megan

Sundown came not long after we'd finished the pizza, and people came with it.

Sam had suggested we wait out by the fire pit, and I pulled my coat tighter as much for my nerves as to ward off the chill breeze. I was thankful Cade and Raven, and I assumed, their parents, were first to arrive.

Mr. and Mrs. Rivers hung back and waved to me as Cade and Raven made their way over to us.

"Hey, guys," Sam said.

"Beta bro." Cade slapped Sam on the shoulder. "Beta lady," he said to me with a hint of cheek.

Sam glared. Cade grinned and shut up.

"Hi, Megan," Raven broke in, rolling her eyes at her brother. "Did I get everything you needed for baking?"

"Absolutely." I was grateful to have a topic I was totally comfortable with. "Actually, I made you some mini cheesecakes as a thank-you. They're waiting for you in the fridge."

"Oh, wow! You didn't have to do that." Her smile was so genuine it helped put me at ease.

Before we could continue conversation, tires crunched the gravel and my new in-laws stepped out of a dark SUV. I felt Sam stiffen at my side and felt my own wolf tighten, instinctively anxious on his behalf, as well as nervous at being near Dominic Wolfe.

He stepped regally to the edge of the fire pit, nodding deeply to Mr. and Mrs. Rivers and then to us.

"Samuel, how about we get a fire started?" he called out. His voice still carried the distinct edge of the Alpha, but for the first time, it held no traces of anger. I felt Wolf exhale, and I joined her relief.

"You good for a few minutes?" Sam said quietly. I nodded, and he and Cade went to go help stack firewood within the stone circle. Mr. Wolfe took Sam aside and whispered something in his ear. Sam shook his head, and Mr. Wolfe frowned slightly before bending down and handing Sam a stack of wood. I wondered what that exchange was all about.

"So this is your first Gathering?" Raven asked.

"Definitely. Anything I should know?" I tried to keep my voice light.

She laughed. "Nah, just the usual meet and greet." She smiled at me, but her eyes were curious. I gave her kudos for not peppering me with questions. If I had been her and my second-in-command had a newly wolfed girlfriend, which Raven had to realize by now, I wasn't sure I'd be able to remain quiet on the subject.

Mary walked over and motioned for Raven's parents to join us. She made introductions.

"Steve, Amalie, this is Megan. Megan, Steve and Amalie Rivers."

"Good to meet you," I got out.

"The pleasure is ours." Amalie smiled back. It was clear that Cade and Raven got their dark coloring from their dad. Their mom was almost white-blonde. The adults moved off a few paces after a few minutes as other people started pouring into the back yard of the cabin.

Wolf was having a heyday with all the new smells and sounds. I was glad Raven was there while Sam and Cade were getting the fire started. Tammy came over not long after, and we made small talk together.

"So how are things?" Tammy asked, her eyes insinuating more than a casual question.

"Um, all right," I said honestly. I wasn't great, and at the moment I was a little terrified of what was coming. A distinctive twinkle shimmered in Tammy's eyes.

"I remember Sam's first Gathering as Beta. He was so nervous that he would do or say the wrong thing. He was so distracted that he didn't even realize when he set his own tail on fire." Raven snorted, and Tammy had to pause through a fit of giggles. "We've never let him live that one down!"

My mouth tipped up, and I found myself laughing with them, some of the tension leaving my shoulders. Tammy had a good read on my situation, and she clearly enjoyed reliving her cousin's mishap. I appreciated the story and her efforts to make this less scary.

Sam and Cade sidled up right at that moment and Sam took one look at Tammy before rolling his eyes.

"Tammy, you didn't."

"Oh, Sammy, I did," she replied with a saccharine smile.

"It was not one of my finest moments," Sam confessed to me as the glow of the growing fire lit up his face.

"Liar, liar, pants on fire," popped out of my mouth before I could stop it.

Sam processed for a second, mouth opening in shock, then burst out laughing the same time Cade did.

Grinning, Wolf nudged me, pleased at my teasing. We all sobered about ten minutes later when Dominic stood up on a three-foot section of stump as a makeshift podium.

"Thank you all for coming to tonight's Gathering." His voice boomed in the hush as logs crackled and sparks flew up into the night sky. Nerves attacked my belly, and Sam reached for my hand. Much like the first time we met his parents, I wasn't sure if it was more for his benefit or for mine. Dominic continued.

"We have some shocking but exciting news. As I'm sure some of you have now surmised"—he glanced at us and our joined hands—"our Beta has found himself a girl."

There was cheering and clapping as my face flushed and Sam forced a smile. His grip on my fingers tightened.

"Historically, there would have been a large celebration and a lot of fanfare with a Changing Bite taking place publicly—" There was a collective gasp and a few sharp intakes of breath as he enunciated the words. "—but it was decided that this would be done more quietly and without all the elaboration for the comfort of those most intimately involved. Full approval has been given by the guardian, George Carmichael, with whom many of you are familiar, for these current circumstances. I expect this is a shock to many of you as the last time our pack was expanded by a bite was over two hundred years ago. Traditions will still be upheld. George Carmichael has known of our existence for over seventy years."

I fervently wished Grandpa was here with me now and noticed Dominic conveniently left out his lack of approval.

"Is it any wonder that his granddaughter has fallen in love with the allure of the Wolf and the charms of our Beta?" Mr. Wolfe cracked a charismatic smile, and there was foot stomping and more clapping. I wanted to melt into the ground. Sam stood resolutely beside me, clinging to my hand. His smile was friendly enough, and I tried to paste a matching one on my own face. Mr. Wolfe continued, "With that being said, please let me introduce to you our newest pack member and partner to my son, Megan."

I tried not to hyperventilate as roughly forty pairs of eyes focused on me as I now clung to Sam's hand. Mr. Wolfe's speech had not been overly long or overly approving, but it had been received well enough, and now I was the focus of everyone's curiosity.

Sam squeezed my fingers and then his voice sounded in my head. You're doing great. Let me know if you get too overwhelmed.

I squeezed his fingers back. Sam was more relaxed now. Dominic was saying something else, but the words were lost in the rush of blood going past my ears. Wolf rubbed her head against me for moral support, which I found both odd and comforting.

Remember to let your wolf do the scenting. Let her up to the surface, and she'll do the rest. Sam's voice echoed inside my brain. I about had a panic attack on the spot as I realized that every person there was queuing up, ready to come sniff and be sniffed.

Mr. Wolfe headed the lineup. Anyone else. Could no one else scent me first? Wolf quaked but braced herself against me, giving us both courage. He stopped at Sam first, though they must have been as familiar with each other's scents as they were their own. Maybe this was all just formality, and it wouldn't send my knees knocking and my guts churning as it had when Sam had done it.

Once Mr. Wolfe was in front of me, he leaned down and quickly ran his nose the length of my neck, not touching me, for which I was profoundly thankful. I realized he was holding his own neck out for me, and with an encouraging squeeze of Sam's hand, I consciously called the wolf up and let her satiate her terrified curiosity of Dominic Wolfe.

Slowly I leaned in and closed my eyes. I imagined I was sniffing another spice container with the wolf. Pine and grass.

I opened my eyes. Mr. Wolfe nodded once and then Mary was there. "Congratulations, dear." She beamed.

I smiled weakly and cautiously repeated the same scene—spices. It's just like smelling spices. It was easier to do if I kept my eyes closed. Mary's scent reminded me of lilacs.

Raven, Tammy, and Cade had all managed to get to the front of the line, as if sensing my need to practice my scenting a few more times.

I soon gave myself over to the sensation of the new scents. I kept Sam's hand firmly in mine, and that helped keep the wolf under control. People were excited and nearly everyone had something nice or congratulatory to say to either one or both of us.

"Welcome to the pack!"

"I'm so glad our Beta found such a lovely girl."

"Sam, you sly old dog!"

"I knew you wouldn't take the traditional route!"

"You're so pretty!" a tiny little girl said. I couldn't help but respond by smiling widely to her and sinking down on my knees so we were properly eye to eye.

"Thank you. I think you're pretty, too," I told the little pig-tailed child. She couldn't have been more than five.

"Can I sniff you now?"

"Darby, that's not a polite thing to ask," her mother shushed her and gave me an apologetic smile.

"Of course." I was not at all uncomfortable letting little Darby take a whiff of me, if only the rest of pack could be so unassuming and not intimidating.

She put her sweet little nose up to my neck and inhaled deeply. "Mm. You smell good, too." I grinned, and nearly laughed when she stuck her neck out like a chicken. "Do me now!" And how could I refuse that?

I scented her, dirt and chocolate, and then I snuffled her with my human nose, tickling her and making her giggle.

"You have a natural way with children," Darby's mother cooed as she leaned down and ran her nose up my neck—touching the skin. I gave her a tight smile, resisting the urge to wipe my neck.

By the time the logs were red embers giving off little yellow sparks, I'd had enough. Wolf was keyed up with so much new sensory information that I thought I was going to explode if I didn't get some of this energy out of my system. There were two people left in the line, and they went through quickly.

As soon as it was only Sam and me standing there, I glanced around and was surprised to note that a lot of people had changed into those large gray robes. Ah. The pack run. At least maybe I'd get some energy out.

"Come on. We can go back up to the cabin, and you can change there so you're not in front of everyone."

I nodded, nearly bouncing on the soles of my feet. Never letting go of my hand, Sam walked me back up to the front of the house and held the door open for me.

"You handled that beautifully," he said as the door snicked shut.

"I imagined everyone was a large bottle of spice."

He chuckled. "Well, it must have worked."

"Um, should I go for the robe?" I was unsure how exactly the next part of the evening was going to play out. I could tell that I needed the run, although I wasn't sure how we were going to do that, since I'd never done more than pace the living room a few laps. I hoped I wouldn't fall on my face in an undignified heap of fur in front of everyone.

"You can, although you'll probably be more comfortable if you shift here and then wait to shift back once we're in the cabin again. I know you don't like, um, to be on display," he said, averting his eyes.

That was true.

"How exactly will we do this, this pack run? What if I can't keep up?" Doubts and insecurities waffled with the desire to let the wolf have her head.

"We can start out with them. I'll stay with you, and if we need to slow down, it's no problem. We can run for as long or as short a time as you want. We just need to make an appearance. This run is specifically to celebrate you joining the pack."

I grimaced. Gah. I wanted to be fully human so badly, but at least I was able to tolerate the wolf now, for the most part. She huffed at me indignantly. At least we hadn't had a sporadic shift yet. Holding Sam's hand in a vice-like grip all night probably helped.

****

I was able to call up the wolf without much difficulty. She was eager to get out, especially knowing I was going to attempt to let her out for the longest amount of time yet. In the cabin, Sam was gentleman enough to let me shift first in case I needed help. The change came quickly, and minutes later Sam was a wolf beside me.

My wolf took one good inhale of him and sent so many signals shooting to my brain I about fell over. My wolf was nuts about Sam. It made my head swim, drowning in the pine and snow scent of him, all musky, male, and entirely attractive. I think my tongue lolled out of my mouth before I yanked on Wolf's will and tried to shut her up. She yipped, and Sam's wolf cocked his head at me.

Is she behaving?

No. Not particularly, I panted back. She pranced us around Sam like a little puppy, irritating me and sending my already frazzled nerves past overdrive. Wolf-Sam moved next to me, his fur brushing against mine. Wolf careened us into him. Sam skidded over a step, knocking into the table.

Enough!I growled at my wolf. She nudged me with her head—our head—and whacked it against the table. I snarled at her, and she wiggled to get closer to Sam. This was not going well.

Sam was breathing hard, but I didn't have time to worry about it. How was I ever going to control this beast long enough to coordinate a run with other wolves? If she went this crazy next to Sam's wolf, what would she do surrounded by forty others? I felt my control slipping. Wolf was taking charge and leaving me behind. I was losing myself to the animal and fear of losing myself paralyzed me.

Sam!

Wolf shook her head again, rubbing us against Sam's side. He turned, stared straight into our eyes, and put his open mouth right over our muzzle, biting down ever so gently. Wolf surrendered control at once and calm enveloped me. On some baser level, I realized something primal had happened, but I had no idea what it was. Wolf recognized Sam was in charge, and her crazy antics stopped. She sat quietly, awaiting my instructions.

I was wheezing from the emotional struggle of wills and trying to fight her for control of my own body. I stood on shaky legs, dreading going out the door to face the rest of the pack.

Wolf-Sam leaned his head down, rubbing his head against my neck, and whined softly. I felt him scent me again as he nudged me softly. It filled Wolf with heat and something like…desire? It made me uncomfortable. Like an itch I couldn't scratch. I shook my head again in frustration and tried to put one paw in front of the other. We were not perfectly synced, but Wolf was at least mostly compliant after Sam did, well, whatever it was that Sam had done.

We made it to the door, and Sam got up on his hind legs, flipped the latch with a paw, and then used his nose to open the door the rest of the way.

Moonlight streamed down onto the gravel of the drive before the house and the aromas of autumn and wolf hit me in the face with nearly as much strength as Sam's scent had. Wolf was nearly beside herself with joy as she took in the new smells. To my surprise and relief, she didn't go crazy after each new smell and, more importantly, the other wolves, like she did after her first she whiff of Wolf-Sam. Our gaze trained to the waiting pack. Fur and glowing eyes gathered around the cabin. My insecurities began creeping back up. It was worse than changing clothes for the first time in sixth grade gym class. All those half-naked bodies at various stages of development. Everyone trying not to notice anyone else and being so uncomfortable that my hands shook. It felt like that, standing in the doorway in my fur while the pack stared.

A lone howl rose up from the back, and Wolf instantly recognized it as the Alpha's call. Shock ran through me as I realized that it was that voice, that wild, throaty noise, that I would obey in an instant if ordered. I knew Dominic Wolfe was the Alpha of the pack, but until this moment, as a wolf, I hadn't felt his power over me deep in my bones. His howl compelled me forward, tripping and stuttering down the steps onto the cold grass.

Sam was right beside me, fur touching mine, warm at my side, the wind ruffling over me, bringing more new information. Sam's cold, wet nose touched my cheek. I wasn't sure if it was supposed to be affectionate or if it was to get my attention. Ready to try out your paws?

I gasped as Dominic howled again and started the pack moving toward the woods. The run was upon us.

Wolf took the initiative and tried to spring forward to join her pack, but my fear held me rooted, and one of my concerns materialized. Her leap and my fear hurdled us both, nose first, straight into the dirt, my feet and tail flying up over my head. Ugh.

****

It was cold. My paws were wet. I was muddy. There were twigs stuck all over my fur. There was so much sensory information floating around that my brain was on constant overload. I wasn't sure how much more information I could process before I blasted into a million pieces. Wolf was having the time of her life. She was running with abandon—at least as much as she could with my clumsy attempts to keep up. I was still trying to figure so many things out that we weren't as synced as we probably should have been to be running through the forest in the dark, where branches were constantly snagging my fur and roots were creeping out of the shadows to bang my shins.

After about ten minutes, I was done. I was so done. Wolf whined, not remotely finished. I was cranky, sore, and bruised. I was over it. I wanted to curl up as a human, have a cup of tea, and eat a cookie. Maybe five or six.

Sam, I need to be done.

Let's head back. Want to race?

I slit my eyes at him. He had the audacity to make some chuffing noise that I assumed meant he was laughing at me. I snipped my teeth at him. He nudged his head against me, letting me know he wasn't making fun of me and headed us back toward the cabin.

Wolf didn't want to go in, but I had no trouble asserting my dominance this time. She had been let out, she'd run outside, and she had the scents of forty-something wolves and all manner of fall noises and sights to sift through and commit to memory. She acquiesced easily, and then I stood there, naked, human, in the bathroom.

A shriek clawed up from my throat when my eyes met my reflection in the mirror.

"Megan?" Sam called.

Horror welled up as I took in my matted hair, twigs, leaves, and a particularly large stick protruding out behind my left ear. Dirt caked my nose and left streaks down the rest of my body. Mud encrusted my hands and arms to the elbows. My hairy legs sported several large dark purple bruises and more scrapes than I could count.

"Megan? What's wrong?" Sam called again. "Here, put this on." He cracked the door from the outside and shoved a gray robe at me. The sight of it was hideous, reminding me again of all things werewolf. This was going to break me. I was not going to survive becoming a wolf.