13. Ashley

13

ASHLEY

I watched the man I had nicknamed Mr. Big walk away to take his call and contemplated whether or not I was actually going to do this. Would I have a one-night stand with a stranger?

If I were ever going to do it, this would be my shot. I wanted to find my Big like Carrie in Sex and The City, where fate, the universe, or whatever dropped the sexiest man I’d ever seen on the barstool beside me.

A one-night-only affair wasn’t typically my M.O. I’d had a twelve-year-long relationship with Garrett. After him, I’d had a few monogamous situationships, but never a straight-up, wham-bam-thank-you-mam, sleep together and then do a walk-of-shame, or as Nadia calls it a got-laid-parade the next morning or even the same night.

It might be the three vodka cranberries I’d had, but the scales were definitely tilting toward a yes. The sexiest man I’d ever seen had just been ready to defend my honor. The look in that man’s eyes when I grabbed his arm and told him no… I was blushing just thinking about it. And the muscles in his forearm… I’d never particularly been attracted to forearms before, but when I felt the strength of his chiseled frame rippling beneath my touch, it sent shockwaves exploding in my core.

When he first sat down, I thought for sure it was another drunk idiot in a suit who was going to sloppily hit on me, but I could not have been more wrong. Besides being Da Bomb hot sauce level hot, this man had a presence about him. An aura. A sex appeal that was indescribable. His pheromones were working overtime.

That was sexy enough, but then he went all hero on me. He was ready to defend my honor. When I saw the look in his eyes, my ovaries ached. He went full caveman- protector. He would have annihilated that man.

I wasn’t the only one who reacted to Big. Over the past hour, I’d gotten to know Lucas, the bartender. Lucas had alpha in him. He was not a beta. But as soon as Lucas saw Mr. Big, his entire demeanor switched. Xavier, if that was his real name, radiated authority and dominance. He was one of those people who walked into a room and the atmosphere changed.

“Hey, chickadee.”

I turned around and saw Fatima standing behind me. Her face was lit with excitement.

“How did the audition go?”

“I drowned in flames.”

“Do you mean you went down in flames?” She smiled widely. Fatima had always found the fact that I said phrases the wrong way amusing.

“Is that what it is?”

She nodded. “Although, I think drowning in flames works, too.”

“Well, either way, it was bad.”

“No! I’m sure you’re just being hard?—”

“No. I’m really not. I started crying and walked out. I didn’t even go into the interview.”

“Why not? What happened?”

I glanced over to see where Big was, just to make sure that he wasn’t coming back and wouldn’t overhear the conversation. He was nowhere to be seen.

“Right before I went in, I found out that Garett and Jenny are having a baby and getting married.”

Her eyes widened to double their natural size. “Jenny, your best friend from home, Jenny?”

“That’s the one.” I’d told Fatima about her. I’d even had pictures of us up in the apartment.

“Oh, wow.” She wrapped her arms around me in a hug. “I’m so sorry.”

I pulled back and shook my head, not wanting to allow myself to fall back into the emotion of it all. “It’s fine. It’s my own fault. Well, sort of my fault. At least the timing is. Garrett’s been trying to get a hold of me for the past couple of weeks, but I was trying to be strong and wasn’t answering his calls because I thought he wanted to get back together. Anyway, more importantly,” I leaned closer to her and whispered, “did you happen to see the guy sitting next to me? Tall, dark, and sexy?”

She nodded. “Yeah, Mr. Wo?—”

“No. Don’t tell me his name. The bartender was going to say it, but he cut him off. He told me his name was Xavier.”

Her face scrunched in clear confusion. “He did?”

Aha, I was right. His name was not Xavier, just like my name was not Carrie. My gut told me that he’d made sure Lucas didn’t say his name and then given me a fake name. I figured if I was going to be an anonymous stranger having a one-night stand, I needed an alias as well. When I saw him and thought he was my Mr. Big, the first name I thought to tell him was Carrie.

“Yes. I don’t care that he gave me the wrong name. To me, he’s Big. I told him my name is Carrie.”

“Carrie?”

“Sex and the City.”

“Ohhhh, and Mr. Big. Got it.” A smile of approval lifted on her face.

“I just want to know two things.” I spoke quickly as I lifted my pointer finger in the air. “One, is he married or in a serious relationship?”

“No. Actually, he jus?—”

“Ah-ah,” I cut her off. “I don’t want details.” I lifted my middle finger to join my pointer. “Two, if I go upstairs with him, will I be featured on Dateline or 20/20?”

Her head tilted to the side like the RCA dog. “What?”

“Will Keith Morrison, Andrea Canning, or Josh Mankiewicz be doing a voiceover of the footage of us having a drink at the bar and then riding the elevator up to his room saying, ‘ Would she have gotten on that elevator if she knew it would be the last time she’d ever be seen ?’” I mimicked Keith Morrison’s signature deep voice and cadence to the best of my ability.

“What?” She chuckled. “What are you talking about?”

“Is he safe? Will he kill me if I go up to his room?”

“Oh, my god, no!” She gasped. “Sorry, that is just so far from anything he would ever do. It didn’t even occur to me that’s what you were talking about.”

“Oh, okay. Good.” I pressed my hand to my chest.

“But, um, I don’t think he would…” Her voice trailed off.

“You don’t think he would what?” I prompted, glancing over my shoulder again to see if he was on his way back—still no sign of him.

“He’s not really that kind of guy. I don’t think he’s interested in that. I’m not saying you’re not amazing… but I don’t think he’s the type of guy who would want to go upstairs and do…that.”

“You don’t?” Damn. Maybe I’d read this situation completely wrong.

Fatima wasn’t a hater. She was one of the most level-headed, sweetest girls I’d ever met. She was also very honest.

“Why not?”

She lowered her voice even more. “He’s just, um, he’s got?—”

“Sorry, that took so long,” a now-familiar deep voice interrupted her explanation.

Both Fatima and I glanced up and saw ‘Xavier’ walking toward us.

“You two know each other?” He glanced between the two of us.

“Fatima and I were neighbors when I was in school in San Francisco,” I explained.

There was a brief moment of awkward silence where no one said a word. I wondered if this was going to be where my fantasy bubble burst and I would find out Mr. Big’s real name. I would be outed as being Ashley and would go upstairs to my comped room and raid the minibar.

“Well, I better get back to work.” Fatima put her hand over her clipped-on radio. “I just wanted to say hi. Great seeing you.”

“You too,” I smiled.

She gave me a quick hug, then waved at us both and walked away.

Big sat back down next to me. When he did, his arm brushed against mine, and skitters of arousal raced up my spine.

“So, you and Fatima were neighbors?”

“Yes. Well, she lived upstairs. Only for a year, then she graduated, but I still lived there.” I lifted my drink to take a sip but ended up downing it in one gulp, suddenly feeling really nervous.

Why had Fatima said that she didn’t think he would be interested in that? Was he gay? Or was I just really not his type?

He was a really attractive man. Maybe I overestimated my appeal. I licked my lips as I set my glass down. I could feel the heat of his stare on me as I did. But maybe he was looking at me because I had something on my face.

Was my radar completely off? Was I reading this situation wrong? Was I so tipsy I was projecting my attraction onto him?

Before speaking to Fatima, I was certain that any second he was going to ask me up to his room, but now I was second, third, and fourth-guessing myself.

I was running back our conversation in my head. He’d asked what my plans were, but maybe he was just being nice. He did take the call after I made the comment about meeting a sexy stranger in the bar.

“Would you like another?” His gravelly voice caused the tiny hairs on the back of my neck to stand on end.

“Um, sure.”

Today had been a roller coaster, and I was not in the mood for any more twists and turns and loop de loops. I felt like a total idiot for not knowing what was going on with Garrett and Jenny. If I’d read this situation wrong, too, then I might just need to throw in my dating towel.

Mr. Big lifted his hand in the slightest, most nonchalant gesture, motioning for Lucas to bring us two more. Even the way he ordered drinks was sexy.

I inhaled slowly through my nose and tried to calm my racing pulse. It was difficult with the man seated so close to me. He gave off an alpha energy that my body was responding to in a way that I never had before. Every cell felt supercharged with awareness and arousal. The air between us crackled with anticipation. At least, that’s what I felt.

Lucas set our drinks down, and I lifted mine to my lips and took a drink, finishing about half the contents.

When I set the glass back on the bar, I blurted out, “Were you going to ask me up to your room? Before the call?”

Big turned his head, and his eyes met mine, and my heart sank down to my stomach like a brick in a fishbowl. I couldn’t tell what was going on behind his guarded whiskey stare. His expression remained steady and neutral. Mysterious and frustratingly sexy.

Finally, he asked, “Did you want me to?”

I blew out a shaky breath. “I’m not sure, but that’s not why I was asking.”

His eyes narrowed slightly. “Why were you asking?”

“Because I wanted to know if my radar is broken or not.”

“Your radar?” he repeated.

“Yes, my opposite-sex radar.”

His face broke into a smile, and I realized in that moment that I was in deep, deep trouble.

Oh, boy.

I’d thought that I’d been exposed to the full potential of this man’s sex appeal, but I could not have been more wrong. His true power was his smile. It was lethal. Deadly. No woman or man who played for the Y-chromosome team would ever be able to resist it. Between the deep dimple in his left cheek and the way his smile reached his eyes, it was positively fatal. He could get away with anything by flashing that smile.

“What?” I asked, wondering what had brought on his dangerous grin. I tried to remember what we’d even been talking about, but my mind was a total blank. That smile had erased my thoughts like an Etch-A-Sketch in a paint-mixing machine.

“You surprised me,” he explained. “I don’t get surprised easily.”

“ I surprised you?” No one had ever told me I surprised them. Well, besides me showing up on Skylar’s doorstep when she moved across the country when I literally surprised her, but that was different. I’d never surprised someone just being myself.

“Yes. You never say what I think you’re going to say. It’s cute.”

“Cute.” I took another drink as disappointment flooded me.

“You don’t like cute?” he observed correctly.

“I was going for sexy or mysterious,” I admitted. I thought that’s what he meant when he’d said I surprised him.

His lips curled at the edges once again.

“Your smile is back,” I pointed out.

“Sorry, you did it again.”

“Great,” I sighed, feeling sorry for myself.

Garrett had always called me cute and look where we ended up. Maybe that’s why Fatima said he wouldn’t want to go up to my room because I wasn’t his type. He probably dated supermodels or CEOs or women who weren’t cute .

“Yes,” Big stated firmly as he lifted his glass and took a drink.

“Yes, what?” I asked.

“Yes, I was going to ask you up to my room.”

A warm flush rushed through my body, and it had nothing to do with the fourth cran and vodka I was on.

I glanced over at him, but he was looking straight ahead. I took a moment to admire his profile—his strong jaw peppered in stubble, the long lashes that any woman would die for, his defined cheekbones and straight nose. I’d never seen such a perfect specimen of the male species before, and, unless I was hearing things, he’d actually just said he was going to ask me up to his room.

“You were?” I swallowed over the large lump of lust clogging my throat.

His head turned, and when his eyes locked with mine, my heart slammed into my chest. “Would you like to go up to my room?”

My cheeks heated, and I felt a lump form in my throat. I nodded and started to grab my purse to pay my bill. He covered my hand with his. I glanced down and nearly fainted when I saw the sheer size compared to my own. His hand dwarfed mine. It swallowed it up. Even his hands were sexy. How had I not noticed them before?

Probably because you were too busy noticing his forearms, face, lips, eyes, and height , a voice that sounded a lot like Nadia said in my head.

“I’ve got it.” With that he stood and walked to the end of the bar.

I watched as Big spoke to Lucas. I finished my drink and got up from the barstool. My legs were a little shaky, but so was my entire body. I wasn’t sure if it was from nerves or arousal. Big joined me, and as we made our way to the elevator bay, he rested his hand on my lower back. It was such an innocent touch, but it felt anything but innocent. I loved the weight of his palm against my body and the way the wingspan of his fingers reached to the sides of my waist.

When we arrived at the elevators, I realized that I needed to do something. “I’ll be right back. I, um, forgot my phone.”

“Okay.”

I headed back to the bar and grabbed a twenty out of my purse. I’d worked in the service industry long enough to know that the more money people had, the worse tippers they typically were. And Big definitely had money. The watch he was wearing cost more than my car. Maybe Big had left Lucas twenty percent or more, but if not, I just wanted to make sure he was taken care of. Thankfully, the bar was out of sight of the elevators, so Big wouldn’t see what I was up to.

When I reached Lucas, I handed him the bill. “Thanks so much for handling that drunk.”

“Of course, that’s my job.” Lucas smiled.

As I walked back around the corner, I saw Big standing at the elevators waiting for me. I drank in his dark, brooding stare, broad shoulders, perfect lips, chiseled forearms, and strong hands. He was dangerously sexy, but somehow, I felt totally safe.

With a small grin, I stepped beside him, and when the doors opened, we entered the elevator. He waved a card in front of the sensor, then hit the button to the top floor. Neither of us said a word on the ride up. I watched the numbers appear as the elevator climbed, and my anticipation escalated with them. Today had not gone as planned, but I felt like the man standing beside me was the universe’s, or fate’s, way of saying sorry. And I was more than happy to accept its apology.