Chapter 13

CHAPTER THIRTEEN

G race swallowed. She'd thought more than once about what it would be like to be married to Ollie over the past few days. The cottage was quaint. His attentions were doting, and full of tenderness. And she'd be a fool if she dwelt on any of it while she had a goal in front of her. It didn't matter what she thought of their time together. She had a responsibility to her family. To her sisters. She swallowed hard. "No one wants to be forced."

"Then we are in agreement," Ollie said, his face devoid of emotion.

"I was still hoping to introduce you to my relations," she said, as they neared the entrance of the drive.

Under the cover of trees, he turned his horse around, pulling Poseidon to a stop when they faced each other. "You know as well as I do that it wouldn't work. "

She nodded. "I know." An uncomfortable lump formed in her throat, and she forced her emotions to stay under control—at least as long as he was still near her.

His horse stamped the ground. "Grace, may I ask you a question?"

"Of course. You may always ask me any question. After all we are good friends. I hope that will not change even if we must pretend otherwise." Her heart squeezed as she said the words. Things would change. The end of this small, secluded path would mark the end of their time together.

"When you catch the duke, even if you do not love him—what then?"

" When I catch the duke? You are all confidence in me—don't you mean if I catch him?"

"My sweet Grace, after being in your company these last days, he would be a fool to let you go. He will recognize the jewel that you are and be completely smitten by you."

"That is very kind of you to say," she said, her heart breaking as he admitted the words.

"And if you don't love him?"

She sighed, her gaze unfocused ahead of her as poetry readings and laughter filtered through her conscious. "I hope it will not be a loveless match for long, after all now that I know …" She stopped herself before she said something she wouldn't be able to take back, that time with him had changed her outlook, and she didn't want to settle. "What I mean to say is a wise friend recently told me that love was worth the heartache. And I believe I can trust him on that." She looked into his blue eyes, which appeared darker under the cover of the trees. "I do hope we meet again," she said.

"I hope that too," he said slowly, as if measuring his words.

She took hold of the fact that he was thinking about it. He didn't immediately dismiss the idea. All at once her words rushed together. "And will you consider coming to the public Christmas ball at the assembly? It is in town and open to the public. The house party will be attending it too. Will you come?"

"I shouldn't want to intrude on your plans with other guests."

She waved her hand in the air, the idea buzzing around her like a nuisance. "Oh you won't. Besides, I should like a proper dance with you, if you will have me." Her cheeks warmed as she thought of the way he'd held her in his arms last night, twirling her around like she was floating on air. What would it be like to have her feet on the ground dancing with him, sans her injured ankle? She wanted to find out, not just imagine that.

"I should like nothing more than to dance with you at a ball."

She smiled, hearing the truth in his words, knowing that in that moment she looked forward to dancing with him more than the duke or anyone else who would be there. " Then I shall hold you to it." Her breath caught at her own forwardness. What was she thinking? She was walking a dangerous line between her duty and her feelings. "After all, friends can dance with one another, can they not? Of course they can."

"And we are friends," he said. His horse side-stepped. "Grace, if circumstances had been different, would you have considered … would we have suited?"

The cavity around her heart tremored at the question. "We do suit, Ollie. But—"

"I am not wealthy enough." He looked to the sky.

Her heart squeezed inside of her. The very idea of drawing breath felt difficult. "That is not it at all, Ollie." They had been dancing around the attraction and connection. But it had never been acknowledged directly. It was easier to think of it in terms of poetry that was beautiful to listen to and not to analyze or apply. "It is not your circumstance, but mine. " Tears threatened at the corners of her eyes, but she willed them to stay in place. "If I was in a different position, things would be different."

Hope seemed to glitter in his eyes. "You would consider me as a suitor?"

"If I had the ability to choose, I would want nothing more." She looked at the path before him. Saying the words aloud made it sound as if she only cared about money. But that was not the case at all. "But I have my family to think of. I have a responsibility to help them, and I have committed to that course. I cannot let them down. I must give my sisters the ability to have the opportunity I cannot take for myself."

"You are an incredible woman to put your family first in such a way," he said sincerely.

She took off the borrowed riding gloves she'd used. She couldn't keep them. She held them out to Ollie. He reached out and accepted his gloves from her, then tucked them under one arm. Then he took her hand in his own. Turning her hand over, he traced his fingers over where the cuts had been on her palm. Gently, he lifted her hand to his lips and kissed her palm.

Grace closed her eyes, letting the sensation of his lips on her skin fill her, even as her heart tried to remain intact. Tears pooled in her eyes, threatening to spill. Her throat tightened, refusing to let words out without emotion. "I was naive to think that because it was a sacrifice that I'm willing to make that it would not affect me. I didn't know what I was saying before. I didn't realize how much of a sacrifice this would be."

He squeezed her hand, his face a mirror of her own emotions. "Grace, I need to tell you something."

"What is it?"

In the distance, the muffled sound of horses pulling a carriage could be heard. Apollo barked at the interruption, and the moment between them dissipated.

Ollie shifted atop his horse, looking around warily. "I will take my leave of you, Grace. We must part before we are spotted."

"Yes, we must." There was a small piece of Grace that wanted to be spotted. It would surely ruin her reputation and create a scandal beyond measure, but being forced to marry Ollie—would that almost solve her problems? Almost.

"If you follow this road all the way to the back of the house, you'll find the stables, and likely a groomsman or stable hand that can assist you."

"Are you heading back to the cottage tonight?" It was getting dark. Would he make it safely?

He looked at the horizon and then back to her. "I am heading home."

"Be safe. The woods can be dangerous," she said, trying to lighten the mood that seemed to grow heavy between them.

He nodded. "That is wise advice."

"I look forward to our dance, if you will come to the Christmas ball," she said.

His eyes brightened. "I should like that. Goodbye, Grace."

"Goodbye, Ollie. Thank you for … everything." A lump formed in her throat.

Poseidon stomped at the ground, but Ollie moved his horse closer to Grace. He took Grace's hand in his again, this time bowing over it and placing a kiss on her knuckles. "It was my pleasure, Grace," he said, whispering the words. Then he clicked at his horse, and they left in the opposite direction.

Grace blinked rapidly and urged Honey forward. She glanced back at Ollie's retreating form. Her pulse raced as she admired him. He sat tall on his horse. He was clearly well trained at riding. Her breath hitched when he turned back around and their gazes locked. He smiled at her and held up his hand in farewell. She nodded, then turned around and headed up the drive.

Honey only made it a few steps before Grace's gaze was drawn backward again. Ollie did not turn around again, though Grace glanced back several more times hoping to catch his gaze. Then the pathway turned, and she lost sight of him completely.

Grace wanted to ride after Ollie, but she knew it would not be proper. She reminded herself that nothing about her friendship with Ollie had followed the societal norms for interaction. But Ollie had always been a perfect gentleman to her. She released the breath she'd been holding once Ollie was no longer in sight.

Was there a way her parents could understand? She knew she couldn't tell anyone about the first time they met, or about how he'd rescued her. They'd be forced to marry after such news spread. But was that perhaps a way to solve the problem of her conflicted heart? No. Adding scandal to a marriage wouldn't be the way forward. And her marriage then wouldn't help her family, only hinder them .

She sighed. He knew her situation. She'd told him in great detail about her family, about each of her sisters, and about their financial situation. She shook her head at the folly of revealing so much about herself. Perhaps it was her fall that had loosened her tongue so much. Perhaps if she'd revealed less, the hurt she'd seen in his eyes wouldn't have been there.

She made her way to the stables, and as Ollie predicted there was someone there to help her. It was a flurry of frenzied mayhem after that.

Susan came out to greet her, practically running toward her before she'd gotten off her horse. "Oh, my dear sweet cousin! You're here on horseback?" She began giving orders to servants. "Where are your trunks?"

"Have they not arrived yet?" Grace asked.

"No. We have had no one along here in days. Of course, we have had a bad storm. How are you here without your trunks?"

She breathed a sigh of relief that her trunks hadn't arrived. She and Ollie's reputations were both still intact. If her trunks hadn't come, then her cousin had had no need to worry about her. "I went on ahead of the carriage," she said.

Susan nodded, but then went back to telling servants what to do. "What happened to your foot?"

"Just a slightly twisted ankle, but I am quite alright, as you see." Grace smiled.

Susan called for a stable hand, and once they were in the stable, he helped Grace from her horse .

"Some guests have already arrived. Although the house party hasn't officially started, we are having a merry time." Susan offered her arm, and Grace leaned more heavily than she would have liked to on her cousin. "Are you truly alright, Grace?"

Grace tried to stand up straighter and not limp as much. "There is no cause for alarm. I am getting better."

Susan eyed her, then called for a servant to fetch a walking stick. It was brought and Grace was able to support her own weight with the tool.

"That is very kind of you," Grace said, though she missed the feel of the smooth, hand carved wood of her crutch. "I'm sure I shall be alright now."

"All guest rooms have been readied. I will show you to yours and then you can take a bath and clean up." Susan led Grace up the stairs. Each step felt arduous and foreign to her, but she made it through the difficulty. After all, there were no steps in Ollie's cottage.

"This room looks beautiful," Grace said when they entered her chamber.

"It is one of our finest guest bedrooms," Susan said. "As your trunks have not arrived yet, I will send a servant with a few changes of clothes from my own wardrobe while you are waiting for yours. I will see that they draw you a bath."

"Thank you, Susan. You are most kind to me."

"I will send for the doctor," Susan said. She embraced her cousin. "I'm so happy you have arrived safely. "

"I am as well. I should very much like to hear your plans for the house party in full."

Susan nodded. "Once you are bathed and in bed resting that ankle I will send for a tray and we can talk then."

Molly, an upper servant, came to attend Grace. After having a bath, Grace was immediately whisked into a nightgown and put into her bed. Soon after a knock sounded on her door. Grace pushed aside the thoughts of how familiar this felt, being in a bed, while Ollie had knocked on the door at night. She glanced to the side of the room where a shelf full of an exhaustive amount of reading on the natural world should have been, but in its place was a large hearth blazing.

"Come in," Grace said, pushing away thoughts of Shakespeare and a deep voice reading her sonnets.

Susan smiled as she entered. "I have sent for the doctor. He will be here soon to check on your ankle."

"I believe it will be fine. There is no need to make such a fuss," Grace said.

"Of course there is. You are my honored guest, and our house party is upon us. You will want to be feeling your very best, if you mean to catch anyone's eye."

Grace looked at her cousin curiously. "I take it you have heard from my parents. "

Susan nodded. "I know you have secured a proposal, but that you are still undecided on it."

Grace filled in the information her parents had left out.

"I have half a dozen gentlemen coming and the same number of ladies. You shall have your pick of any of them. I will make all the arrangements, and as you have not brought a maid along, I will provide one for you. The schedule will be rigorous, with activities planned for the entire week."

Grace knew that this would be the case, but in hearing plans for the schedule, she suddenly grew tired, wanting the comforts of a slower pace—perhaps in a cottage.

"Who are the guests?" Grace asked.

Susan rattled off the names and stations of all the guests coming. It would seem that nothing was left undone.

"And what of your neighbor?" Grace asked. "Will the duke be in attendance?"

Susan shook her head. "I am sorry to say that since I wrote you last, the duke has declined my invitation. He is presently from home, although, I thought I saw him riding earlier across the land between our two properties."

Grace's heart sank. "So the duke will not be here?"

"No. It almost set the numbers to be uneven, but another has also been called away, due to the ailing health of a relative, so Lady Josephine will not be joining us either."

"That is a shame," Grace said. "I'm not sure what I should do." She looked around wondering where Ollie's blanket that had wrapped her foot had gone. "The clothes I was wearing when I came here … "

Susan smiled. "I sent all of your clothes to be laundered. They will be returned to you tomorrow."

Grace nodded. "There was also a blanket with them."

Susan nodded. "I'm sure it will also be laundered. Where did you find a blanket to wrap your foot with anyway? Surely you didn't bring that in your saddlebag?"

Grace smiled. "A good Samaritan lent it to me."

"That was kind," Susan said. "And I'm so glad you were able to find our house so quickly."

Grace nodded. "I found a friendly face who made sure I was going in the right direction and that I made it through the snow safely."

"I see. Well the important thing is you are here now." Susan squeezed Grace's hand. "Now, tell me about this arrangement you have, and how we can best find you a match before the end of this house party."

Grace and Susan talked for the next quarter of an hour, until there was another knock at the door and the doctor entered. The gray-haired man made his way to Grace's bedside and after asking a few questions, looked at Grace's ankle.

After examining it, the doctor said, "Thankfully you do not have a break in the bone. But you do have a sprained ankle."

"How long will it take to heal?" Susan asked the question on Grace's mind.

"I'd guess the recovery will be quick if you let it rest for the next week or two." The doctor then gave a few remedies and made Grace a poultice.

When the doctor left the room, Susan turned to Grace. "A week or two is not so bad. We shall make sure you stay off your ankle as much as possible before the house party, and I'm sure that will do the trick."

"I hope you're right," Grace said.

"Watch and see, it will be the idea of dancing with the duke at the Christmas ball that will heal you." Susan laughed. "He is bound to come to the assembly if he is in town."

Grace laughed at her cousin's remark, doubting that simply thinking about the duke at the Christmas ball would help her ankle heal. Her mind instantly turned to Ollie—would the prospect completely healing in time to dance with him again create some sort of instant healing. "Perhaps I will look forward to the Christmas ball then."

"The duke is an excellent dancer," Susan said. "I'm sure I've told you that before. I've partnered him a couple of times, and it has never been an unpleasant experience."

"I don't know much about him," Grace admitted. Except for what Ollie told her, but she wasn't going to reveal that to her cousin. "Perhaps you can tell me all about the guests who are coming."

"I will tell you what I know of each of them," she said, taking the seat beside Grace's bed. "There are plenty of eligible bachelors here, and you will have a grand time with all of them. They are all wealthy and titled. Not as wealthy as a duke, perhaps, and not as high of a rank, but perhaps you'll be able to snag one of them instead, and give up the idea of the duke."

Grace listened to her cousin talk about the different invited guests, but she hardly heard a word. The idea of snagging someone else, even the duke, had lost much of its appeal. She still didn't like the idea of marrying someone twice her age, but instead of thinking of the party guests she thought of blue eyes and a jaw covered in stubble. Snagging someone else did not appeal to her in the slightest, unless it was a particular someone who lived remotely. Grace shook her head, wishing to let go of the silly notion.

"Well if you do not like Mr. Ashworth, there is a son of an earl that would do well," her cousin said, thinking that Grace had shaken her head to her cousin, instead of herself.

Grace tried to pay attention, but as Susan spoke of each gentleman, her heart was not in it. Of course it wasn't. She had to marry for money, for status, for a title. She was the one who would help her sisters have a choice. She loved all of them, and this was her responsibility. Would a marquess or an earl do for her family? Would her parents approve of that and not require her to marry a man who was twice her age if they didn't agree to help them out financially?

She swallowed. If an earl without financial help was good enough for her family, could someone of even lower standing be acceptable too? She shook her head. It was impossible. She required the connection to be able to help her sisters. She would be allowing them a choice. They would be able to marry whoever they wanted to, be it a marquess or a farmer. And she would marry to secure their choices. She would do it happily and with grace. But that didn't stop Ollie's eyes from appearing in her mind each time she closed her eyes, or tried to picture someone her cousin was describing.