Chapter 55 The Ex

It doesn't surprise me at all to find Joel in Francesca's restaurant.

He comes here all the time. Or at least, he used to in the year after Francesca died. A family member of hers bought it and kept the name in her honor. Angela was Francesca's mother. She had the same name as my grandmother—yet another thing Francesca and I had in common.

But since he's been with Cassie, Joel hasn't been here as much. He's getting over it. He's been happy again for the first time in a long time.

I enter the small restaurant that Francesca had once owned. The first time I came here, back when Francesca was still alive and kicking, I had been intensely jealous. She had the man I wanted, and she was living my dream of having her own restaurant. I had always imagined a small Italian bistro just like this one .

Sometimes Dean tells me I should go for it. Follow my dream—open my own restaurant. But I can't now. Not while Andrew is so young. And once he doesn't need me anymore, it will be too late. No, that dream has passed me by. But at least I can cook for my little family. Francesca will never cook for anyone ever again.

I enter the restaurant and walk to where Joel is sitting, drinking a glass of wine. He lifts his eyes when I approach his table, and he doesn't say anything when I fall into the seat across from him.

Joel is still as handsome as he ever was. These days I prefer Dean's looks though. I never get tired of staring into my husband's face. But Joel hasn't lost his old appeal. He'll age well. I bet all the women in the ER still hit on him.

"I like Cassie," I say to break the silence.

Joel stares down at the table. "Yeah, so do I."

"So what are you doing here?"

He sighs and rakes a hand through his hair. "I don't know. The thing with Francesca… that was rough. I'm still not over it. Sometimes I think I am, but I'm not."

"I think you are."

"No." He says it firmly, without room for argument. "That was… awful. My whole relationship with her was… well, tumultuous."

I offer a smile. "You said you wanted something different."

"Don't remind me." He rubs his temples with his fingers. "Things are getting really intense now with Cassie and… I…"

I squint at him. "Wow, you're really in love with her, aren't you?"

"Yes," he admits. "I am. But part of me doesn't want to be, because… I can't take losing someone else like I did with Francesca. I just can't. It almost killed me."

I heard what happened to Joel after Francesca's death. Dean told me he started drinking way too much. It got bad enough that he was forced to take a leave from work. He came close to losing his job—his medical license. It almost destroyed him.

"I'm a mess, aren't I?" he mutters. "You're lucky we didn't end up together."

"Mmm."

He lifts his blue eyes. "I know you hated me for ending it, but you know as well as I do it was the right thing to do. I cared about you, but we weren't happy together. We were staying together out of habit." He plays with the napkin in front of him. "When I see you and Con… You're so great together. That's what I want. That's what I've always wanted."

He's right. I couldn't see it at the time, but when I found my other half, I realized he had done me a favor when he ended our relationship.

"So what's wrong with Cassie? Why can't you have that with her?"

"I don't know." He sighs. "Cassie's been saying all these crazy things. She thinks some woman is stalking her. I don't know where that's coming from."

"Here's the thing." I put my elbows on the table and lean forward. "I think she might be right."

He narrows his eyes at me. "Who do you think is stalking her?"

I hesitate. "I think it's Lydia."

" Lydia ?" Joel snorts. "She can't be bothered to stalk someone. She's too important and busy working and… I don't know… teaching Violet to speak Mandarin or something."

I pause, uncertain if I should reveal the next piece of information. But Joel should know the whole story. "Lydia and Pete are having a rough time, and she's… she's really missing Francesca a lot."

He winces. "She still blames me, doesn't she?"

"She does."

"I can't fault her." He rubs his temples. "I still blame myself." He frowns. "But that doesn't mean she'd—"

"Don't be so sure. Lydia hates you for what happened to Francesca. And she's furious that Cassie is replacing her."

"She told you that?"

"Yes." I take a deep breath. "Also, I spoke to Cassie, and she told me she thinks someone has been in her apartment."

"Someone in her apartment ?" His eyes widen. "Jesus, why didn't she tell me?" He jumps to his feet so quickly that the chair he's sitting in falls over backward. "I've got to talk to her. We've got to get to the bottom of this."

But he waits a minute for me to gather my belongings and follow him. As we walk toward the exit of the restaurant, I feel his hand tug at my arm. "Hey, Anna," he says.

I turn to look at him. "Yes? "

His smile is crooked. "I'm really glad we're friends again. And I'm glad your life turned out the way you wanted it."

I return his smile. "Me too."