Chapter 37

CHAPTER

THIRTY-SEVEN

SPENCER

“Stand the fuck down,” Evan’s voice growls. She drops her chin. I know she’s attempting to appear submissive, but she’s manipulative as fuck. “Spencer,” he calls out.

Turning my head against my better judgment, I look over my shoulder at him. “You okay, beautiful?” he asks.

“I’m fine,” I whisper.

He moves past me, heading straight for Jasmine. I wait for her to tell him she’s pregnant, but she doesn’t. I don’t think she is. It was just a way to knock me off my feet—it didn’t work.

She tilts her head back and looks up at him, feigning doe eyes. I want to call her out so badly, but I don’t. I know Evan is smarter than that bullshit. He lifts his hand and runs the back of his fingers down her cheek.

She closes her eyes, and I watch as her lips part.

This is what she wants, and I can’t stop the pang of jealousy that slices through me. Closing my eyes, I try to keep from screaming or crying at what’s happening right in front of my own eyes.

Then she gasps, and my eyes widen. He curls his fingers around the front of her throat, but not in the sexy way he does to me. He squeezes—hard. She tries to pull his arm off, her nails scratching his wrist, and I can do nothing but stand there and watch.

I don’t know what to do. What to say. But I watch in silence as the light drains from her eyes. I know I’m supposed to feel something about it. I’m supposed to feel sad or guilty, something, but I don’t feel anything except relief.

Evan releases his grasp, and I watch as she drops to the floor in a pile of flesh and bones. He turns to me slowly, his eyes finding mine. He looks like a savage. This is the man I remember from ten years ago. He moves toward me, and I back away. But he’s faster. He lifts his hands, cupping my cheeks.

The same hands that just killed a woman are cupping my cheeks so gently that I can’t believe it was him. And I also can’t believe that I want his hands on me—everywhere. His mouth touches mine, his kiss nothing more than a brush of the lips.

He lifts his head, his eyes finding mine. “When I figured out she was here, I thought she was going to hurt you.”

“She didn’t,” I whisper. “You killed her.”

His lips twitch into a smirk. “I know that doesn’t bother you,” he says.

“You looked possessed when you saw her.”

Evan shakes his head once. “Possessed? No,” he murmurs. “Angry and scared? Yes.”

I curl my fingers around his wrists as I hold on to him. These hands literally just killed someone, and yet, I want them to touch me… everywhere. I realize what that makes me sound like, but I don’t care.

“She was a threat, just as much of a threat as someone from the Southern Mafia, just as much of a threat as someone with a gun. She called in some federal group that had my men on the ground, on their stomachs, with guns pointed at their heads. She’s a fucking threat, and she needed to be terminated.”

Sinking my teeth into my bottom lip, I nod once. My eyes are focused on his. Letting out my breath through my nose, I release one of his wrists and cup his cheek with my own hand. I slide my thumb across his bottom lip, feeling the softness of his skin and wish it were between my legs.

Maybe I’m just as savage as he is.

I am Humble Maddison’s sister, after all, and that man is no saint by any means.

“What do we do with her? Won’t those federal people be looking for her?”

Evan dips his chin, his hands falling away from me as he takes a step backward. “I’m sure they will, considering I think she was fucking one of them. Which is probably the only reason we were even raided, considering they had nothing on us.”

“I gotta make a phone call. Tomorrow, you visit your brother, right?”

“Yeah,” I exhale. “Tomorrow, I visit Humble.”

That realization hits me. Tomorrow, I visit Humble. I don’t know how I feel about it. I’ve been nervous and excited and also trying to put it in the back of my mind. I could make myself sick about the situation, mainly just because I’m so nervous.

Evan dips his chin, turns toward the body, and digs his phone out of his pocket. I don’t listen to his phone call. It’s not my business. Instead, I slip out of the house and stay on the back porch again.

I curl my fingers around the rail. Leaning over slightly, I stare at the ground. The guilt consumes me, but it’s not the guilt that I should be feeling. I know that a good person would feel bad about what happened to Jasmine. But I’m not a good person because I only feel guilty for not feeling guilty. What a mess. Then I feel him at my back. I don’t even have to turn around to look at him. I know who it is. His lips touch the side of my neck as his arms wrap around me, and he places his palms on the tops of my hands.

“I love you, beautiful,” he rasps against my shoulder. “Atomic said he’s got this under control.”

Turning my head slightly, I look up into his eyes. “Okay,” I say, my voice coming out softer than I intend it to. “I love you, too, Evan.”

“This life is ugly sometimes, Spencer.”

“I know,” I whisper. “It’s one of the reasons I hated it for years.”

He hums, but he doesn’t respond. His gaze shifts to the water and trees in front of us, so I turn my head back around and do the same. The warm breeze continues to slide over us.

“You’re not going anywhere, never again,” he rasps.

Arching my back, I press my ass against his hips. “I’m not going anywhere,” I whisper.

And this is the moment I realize I am my brother’s sister. I am savage, just like him, just like Evan. Just like the Dark Horse MC. I am one of them because I could fuck Evan right here and now, dead body just a few feet away or not.

Wouldn’t matter to me.

The sound of crunching tires interrupts my wicked thoughts, and Evan pushes off the rail and takes a step away from me. I watch as he walks back into the house, and a few minutes later, the cabin is full of men wearing the Dark Horse MC cut.

It’s the cleanup crew.

brEW

“We go in together,” Spencer whispers.

We’ve both been approved to visit Clink, but I wasn’t planning on going until the next week. I wanted to make sure that Spencer and her brother got their time together. But if she needs me there, I’m there, even if it could piss him off.

Unfolding from the car, I make my way to the passenger side to open the door for her. She places her feet flat on the asphalt, then stands, straightening herself. I watch as she brushes her palms down the thighs of her jeans.

Taking her hand, I tug her behind me, and we walk toward the entrance. Spencer trembles with each step she takes. Before we cross over the threshold of the prison entrance, I turn to her and tug her against me, then dip my chin and touch my mouth to hers.

“I love you, beautiful. It’s going to be just fine.”

SPENCER

We walk into what looks like a high school cafeteria, without the lunch ladies, just tables with a single inmate sitting at each one. I see him before he even looks up. Evan’s fingers against my lower back flex when my spine straightens at the sight of Humble.

I want to run up to him. I want to throw my arms around him and hug him. I didn’t realize how much I missed my brother until this moment. My feet move faster as I head toward him. He stands when I’m directly in front of his table.

Slowly, Humble rises to his feet and wraps his arms around me in a hug. Closing my eyes, I lift my arms and do the same. He releases me, extending his hand to shake Evan’s. We don’t say anything while we take our seats, knowing that we can’t dawdle on our greetings.

Humble’s eyes find mine, and he gives me a grin. “So, this shit finally happened, huh?” he asks.

“It did,” I say in a whisper. At the same time, Evan chuckles.

Sliding my tongue along my bottom lip, I look into his eyes. “Are you okay?” I ignore his observation about me and Evan.

He already knows we’re together. Both Evan and I have told him as much. Maybe it’s just sinking in since he’s seeing it, but I want to know that he’s okay. Humble looks down at the table before he slowly lifts his gaze to meet mine.

“I’m okay, Spencer. I swear. I’m okay.”

I want to believe him, but I can see the way his eyes look. Not on the surface, of course, but behind them, looking deeply into them, I can see that they’re haunted. It’s not simply because he’s here. It’s because of what’s happening to him here.

I won’t embarrass him, though. There’s no point to it. He has far too much pride in admitting anything could ever be wrong. He is the strong man, the big brother, he is the Dark Horse MC.

“So you’re staying?” he changes the subject.

“I’ve moved in with Evan,” I confess.

He dips his chin and holds my gaze. “I’m glad you’re home,” he whispers. “And for what it’s worth, even if I have to beat his ass when I get out, I approve of this. The two of you.”

I laugh softly at the same time Evan chuckles. We talk for thirty minutes, chatting about my apartment in Austin and how we’re going to go get everything next week. He also asks me about my car and if I can even charge it in Pineville, obviously feeling the same disgust for it as Evan and the rest of the guys do.

When I know it’s time for me to make myself scarce, I dip my chin in a slight nod, then I stand and tell them I’m going to go to the vending machine. I don’t know what they’re going to talk about, but it’s clear they need a moment.

I hover around the vending machines for about twenty minutes before I make my way back to them with nothing but a single water in hand. After I sit down on the bench, we talk for another couple of moments. Humble asks me a few more questions about my move and my lease—very big brother stuff, which makes me smile.

Our time is up not long after that, and I have to leave him. When I give Humble a hug, he murmurs against my ear.

“I love you, Spencer. I really am glad you’re back.”

Taking a step back, I give him my brightest smile. I can’t believe that our time is already up. I could stay here all day and talk about absolutely nothing with him. I didn’t realize how much I truly missed my brother.

“I’m glad to be back, too, and I’ll see you next time.”

I try to keep from crying, and Humble clears his throat before he shakes Evan’s hand. I watch as he turns away from us and walks over to the guards with the rest of the prisoners. We leave, mainly because I can’t stomach watching him walk back into that place.

Once we’re outside, I suck in a deep breath, feeling the air hit my lungs, and I almost burst into tears because my brother can’t have this. He’s not breathing free air this way. Every single breath he takes is completely tainted by that place.

“Spencer,” Evan calls out from behind me.

I spin around to face him, giving him a smile. It’s sad. I know it is because I’m sad. Evan wraps his fingers around the side of my throat before he leans forward and touches his lips to my mouth.

“I’m proud of you, Spencer.”

Sliding my tongue across his bottom lip, I pull back slightly to look into his eyes. “I didn’t do anything to be proud of,” I whisper.

He grins. “Yeah, you did. You went in there, and that is a feat in itself, beautiful. You made your brother smile. And you not only gave him a sense of happiness but also peace. You lifted his spirits a lot higher than I could have ever done.”

“Why are you so good to me?” I ask.

He laughs softly. “You, of all people, know that I’m not. But fuck me, I’m going to try to make you happy every day until the day I fucking die.”

“You’re doing a damn good job,” I exhale.

His mouth touches mine again, and right there, in the middle of the federal prison’s parking lot, I kiss my man, and I’m happier than I ever imagined I could be.

I love this man.

He loves me.

And we’re embarking on a life that I never even dreamed was possible. I can’t wait to go to bed and wake up tomorrow.

I feel like I live in a dream every single day.