Chapter 23

CHAPTER

TWENTY-THREE

SPENCER

Gnaw watches me as I pack my stuff, but he has the good sense not to try and change my mind. I am determined, and he’s known me long enough to realize that there is no talking me out of a damn thing right now. I’m heated… but most importantly, I’m hurt.

Once all of my stuff is back in my suitcase, I tug it behind me, thankful that this happened before I moved my entire life here. I’m ready to return to my world. After I visit Humble, of course. I have to make sure he’s okay before I get in my car and drive back to Austin.

“What do you want to do?” Gnaw asks, dipping his chin to my luggage.

I roll my eyes to the ceiling, then lower them back to meet his. “I want to go back to Ophelia’s,” I state.

“You know that whatever he has with her, it ain’t shit, right? She’s here to cause problems, and you’re doing exactly what she wants you to do.”

Shaking my head, I try to fight back the tears, but they’re right there, pricking the backs of my eyes. Inhaling a deep breath, I try to calm myself before I have a complete meltdown right here in front of him.

That would be seriously embarrassing.

“It doesn’t matter what she was doing or how she was doing it. I am not here to put on clown makeup and look like an idiot,” I snap.

I’m not sure why, but those words make Gnaw’s lips curve up into a grin. He thinks I’m being funny, but I’m absolutely not doing that. I am pissed off. Hear me roar. He flicks his gaze to the ceiling as if he’s trying to muster up the energy to deal with my crazy ass.

I know that I take some energy because I am ridiculous, but I’m not being overly dramatic. I’m not being anything except rational and sane at this moment. A woman came here, knew who lived here, informed me that she’d been fucking my man for a decade, and then Gnaw sent her on her way, knowing exactly who she was.

I might be a fool, but I’m not an idiotic clown.

“Okay, babe. Back to Ophelia’s you go, but can you please not leave town, at least until you’ve talked to Brew?”

I could make that promise easily, but I’m not in the mood to be agreeable with anyone wearing the Dark Horse MC cut at the moment, so, as childish as it is, I lift my chin and look down my nose at him, refusing to answer.

Gnaw continues to believe that I am not only being funny but cute as well because the asshole just chuckles. He reaches for the handle of my bag and turns to walk away, tugging it behind him without saying another word. Asshole. They’re all assholes.

Once we’re outside, I close the cabin door behind me and, with it, add a little brick and mortar around my heart. Walking toward the bikes, I stop in front of them and look over my shoulder at Guts, who is smiling a little too widely as he watches us.

Gnaw is standing next to his bike, and his shoulders are shaking as he laughs silently. I want to slap him. If I didn’t like Kyle so much, I might do just that. But for her, I won’t. He’s making it hard to refrain, though.

“Let me make a phone call, get you a car down here,” he murmurs after he’s composed himself.

Narrowing my eyes, I nod once, then watch as he fishes his phone out of his pocket. I don’t know why, but I expect him to call Ophelia. I know she’d roll down here as quickly as she could, then she’d probably roll on over to Sal’s Bar and see if they’d let her work the pole again.

I snort, thinking about her dancing on the stage with the rest of us. It was just a few days ago, but it feels like a whole lifetime. Turning my back to Gnaw, I walk toward the lake. It’s not too far from the cabin, and it almost feels like a dream, being this quiet and serene.

I’ve done some hiking and paddleboarding in Austin, but there have always been people every corner you turn. This is different. There isn’t anyone here. The silence consumes me, almost to the point where it’s deafening.

I’m not sure how long I stare out at the water, watching for something to happen, anything, but it stays calm. It almost looks like a painting, and that’s how still it is out there. I don’t see any snakes swimming along the top of the water, and with that, neither do I see evidence of any fish.

It’s strange, to say the least.

The sound of tires crunching against the gravel breaks my serene, calm silence. Turning my head, I look back over my shoulder and grunt. It’s not Ophelia. In fact, it’s not just one person.

It’s three.

Three absolutely beautiful women.

But I don’t want to see any of them right now. In fact, they are the absolute last people I want to see aside from Evan. Damn it, I really like his name. I like thinking it, I like saying it, and I absolutely love screaming it when he makes me come.

In this moment, I fully understand why people continue to fuck people who they don’t want to be with. How they stay in relationships longer than they should. How they completely degrade themselves for another person.

Because I can’t even pretend if that man showed up right now, I wouldn’t bend over and beg him to fuck me—because I absolutely would, and I know how horrible that sounds, but I’m not sure I care too much.

The car doors open simultaneously, and I let out a heavy sigh. Shifting my attention to Gnaw, I narrow my gaze on his, and he lets out a heavy sigh again. I cannot believe he did this shit to me.

“Well,” Ryan calls out, “Brew screwed up, didn’t he?”

I let out a snort as I force myself to walk straight for them. Ryan and Shawn both have their babies with them and then, what feels like seconds later, three bikes come tearing down the driveway.

“Our guards,” Shawn says, rolling her eyes. “We tried to lose them.”

That makes Gnaw chuckle. “Good girls,” he says softly. “Although, probably not something you should do often, especially when they’re supposed to be protecting you.”

Kyle tips her head backward, her eyes finding Gnaw’s, and I watch as he bends down slightly to brush his lips across hers. “Go inside,” he says softly. “Be a good girl.”

I actually hear her whimper from his words, and honestly, I don’t blame her. That good girl stuff is always hot as hell.

Less than five minutes later, my ass is planted on the seat of the sofa back inside the cabin, and I have three women’s eyes focused on me.

I’m the only focal point in the whole room, and I wish I weren’t. I almost ask Shawn and Ryan where the kids are in an effort to shift the conversation to something else, but I can tell by the way they’re staring at me that they wouldn’t take the bait.

“Spill, woman,” Ryan demands.

brEW

Conrad lifts his hand and snaps his fingers twice. I don’t know what the fuck he’s asking with that snap, but apparently, his people do. What feels like seconds later, a pen and paper are delivered to him.

Pressing my lips together, I watch as Conrad bends slightly and places the paper on the coffee table before he quickly scribbles some things down. Then he lifts his head, straightening before holding out said paper to Atomic.

Atomic reaches out to take the page from Conrad. I watch as his eyes scan the document, but he doesn’t say anything. I wish he would read it out loud. I want to know what the fuck this asshole is offering us as a collective because he’s acting like he’s going to give us the goddamn moon, and I just cannot imagine what’s on that paper is all that exciting.

Atomic jerks his chin, lifting his face to Conrad’s. “These are your terms?” he asks.

“Yes,” Conrad confirms.

“Let me talk to my men. Meet tomorrow before we leave town for a final agreement to be written, signed, and witnessed?” Atomic asks.

“Written, signed, and witnessed,” Conrad says, nodding once in agreement. “Now,” he begins as Atomic folds the paper and slides it into the chest pocket of his cut, “to show my good faith, I’d like you all to stay for dinner, drinks, and enjoyment.”

When he says the word enjoyment , I can’t help but notice how his head tips toward the girls.

Fuck.

If this were a few months ago, I would probably enjoy several of them completely and wholeheartedly. But as soon as my eyes shift to them, standing there with their heads tipped submissively, an image of Spencer pops into my head. I can’t help but imagine her naked and spread in my bed.

That’s where I want to be, and if I even thought about dabbling with these women, she’d never be spread naked in my bed again. I’m not even sure if I could coax her back. She made it pretty fucking clear that it’s a hard line for her.

And I don’t blame her because just the idea of another man even looking at her, let alone touching her, makes me want to go on a murderous rampage. So, if monogamy is what she wants, it’s what she’ll get.

At least until it’s not good anymore.

Then we’ll have to revisit, although I can’t imagine anything with that woman being anything less than amazing. Everything about her is absolutely fucking amazing. Nash doesn’t have a single fucking problem with the women, though. He’s the first one to walk straight over to one of them.

I watch as he extends his hand, and she slips her palm into his. King grunts. I would guess he’s grossed out by seeing his father with a woman, but I know that’s not it because we’ve all seen Nash in full-on bare-assed action in the clubhouse when he’s visiting.

No, I have a feeling it’s because King is feeling much like me right now. Taking in the fact that once you sample the favor that Conrad is offering, turning down his written terms is going to be much harder.

I know because we’ve used the same tactics in the past.

Atomic clears his throat, his gaze flicking from Nash as he disappears over to Conrad. “Dinner?” he asks.

“The rest of you would like food before pleasure?” he asks.

I snort but don’t respond. I’m trying to keep my mouth shut and exercise control no matter how difficult it has become. I want to say everything, punch everyone, and shoot them all when I’m finished.

I’m ready for it all.

“I won’t be partaking in the pleasure part, though I’m sure some of the men, like Nash, will be more than happy to do just that.”

Conrad’s brow arches in what I can only assume is a question, and he smirks at Atomic. “Monogamy. Interesting. I didn’t think you people did that.”

Balling my hands into fists at my sides, I can’t help but take offense at the you people part of his assessment. I know he means men who live on the fringe of society, men like me who have the innate natural desire to kill first and ask questions later.

“We surprise even ourselves,” Atomic says, laughing and making it a joke.

The conversation drops, and we follow Conrad into the dining room. What feels like seconds later, there are platters of food set in front of us. His men gather around and sink down in the empty chairs, and we begin to eat.

I’m not sure if this is the best idea. To socialize with these people as if we’re going to be partners. Or maybe Atomic has already made up his mind. I know Nash has. He’s more than happy to help bridge the gap of whatever the fuck this is.

Maybe it’s already a decided partnership. Fuck me, I do not want to help these assholes in any way. But it seems as if decisions are made, bread has been broken, their women fucked.