Chapter 16

CHAPTER SIXTEEN

January 26 th

4:42 P.M.

"You didn't have to come with me, but I'm really glad you did," Lucy told Zander as he opened the passenger door of his truck.

"No place else I'd rather be," he said as his large hands circled her hips, and he lifted her up and into the seat.

That earned an eye roll. "Yeah, I totally believe you. Because sitting in a doctor's office for almost two hours is everybody's idea of a good time."

A grim lit up his face. "Okay, so it was the company not the location that was perfect."

There was a lightness to him that hadn't been there before. It was obvious that making things right with his sister had helped a lot, but she also wondered if it was knowing he had a team at his back again that eased some of his anxiety.

Being undercover must be hell.

Besides the obvious that you were never able to relax, that you had to remain "on" at all times or risk getting found out, you were all alone. There was nobody to watch your six. Nobody to take a turn being on guard so you could get some proper sleep. You had to do and say things that were not only distasteful, but downright disgusting in order to maintain your cover. And there was not an end necessarily in sight. A job could last days, weeks, months, or even years. For Zander, it had been eighteen months of pretending that he was a rogue former Delta Force operator who had faked his death and gone to the dark side.

It hurt to think of Zander alone and hurting, believing he had nothing to live for and nobody who would miss him when he was gone. To know that his plan had always involved him ending his own life at the end when he finally got justice for the team he had loved and lost.

"Babe?" Gentle hands brushed featherlight caresses across her cheeks, and she blinked to make Zander's worried expression come into focus. "Where did you go just now?"

Since they had already decided there was going to be no more lies or half-truths between them, she lifted her good hand and grasped his wrist. "Just thinking about how much you went through and how glad I am that you're not alone anymore. You have Scarlett, and all of Prey, and you have me. I don't ever want you to feel alone again."

A smile transformed him from handsome to downright sinfully gorgeous. "Babe, can I tell you a secret?"

"Mmhmm."

"As long as I have you, I can't ever be alone again. Want to know why?"

"Is that a trick question?" she sassed.

"No, babe." The grin slid from his face, and he got all serious. "It's because you're here." Taking one of her hands, he pressed it to his chest, above his heart. "I don't know how you got in there, but I'm glad you did. And because you did, I'll never be alone again."

Because when Zander was around, emotions she didn't usually have any problem controlling just bubbled up and insisted they be expressed, tears flooded her eyes, making Zander's handsome face go all blurry. "No one has ever said something that beautiful to me before."

Another smile lit up his face. "Good. I don't want anyone else saying beautiful things to you again. That's my job now."

Again with the sweet words. He was killing her here. It wasn't like she had been avoiding looking for a partner or that she was against the idea of falling in love, and she even believed that love existed, she'd seen it in her parents growing up. It was just that maybe, deep down, she'd believed that she would never meet someone who would see her as strong and capable, who could handle her condition and the limitations it placed on her.

Because no matter how many times she insisted to others and to herself that her epilepsy didn't control her life, there were a lot of ways it did in fact impact a lot of what she did and the choices she made.

But Zander looked beyond that.

He just saw … her.

"Your job, huh?" she asked, hoping he meant that and wasn't going to disappear as soon as all of this mess, hers and his, was sorted.

"Hoping I don't get fired." Unlike last night, there was no doubt in his eyes this time around, no uncertainty, somewhere along the way over the last few hours he seemed to have just accepted the fact that they were together.

Now it was her having the doubts.

The doubts weren't about whether or not she wanted to be with Zander and give this relationship a real chance, they were about external factors. Raul Castillo, the mole, the terrorist's brother who wanted Zander dead, his own demons that while temporarily quietened could come roaring back to life and steal him from her.

But today she wasn't going to worry about the future, she was just going to enjoy this moment when everything with Zander was fresh and new. It was exciting, getting to know someone who was already so important to her, and she didn't want to miss any of it because she was worried about problems that right now, she couldn't fix.

"I don't think I have any plans to fire you anytime soon, Zander."

His smile was magic, and the kiss he dropped to her lips made her body tingle and her toes curl.

When he pulled back, she mewled a protest. She could quite happily spend the rest of her life kissing Zander.

Actually, she'd love to spend the rest of her life kissing Zander.

The man knew how to kiss, and she absolutely loved how he poured so much emotion into it. All the things they hadn't talked about yet, she felt with each stroke of his tongue. They were both falling hard and fast and it was as scary as it was exciting.

"Can I take you out to dinner?" Zander asked.

"Like a date?"

"A proper date. No jungles, no sleeping in caves, no plane crashes, and no armed gunmen. Just a guy taking out the most beautiful girl in the world."

His sweet words made her blush. She was hardly the most beautiful woman in the world. Her hair was twisted up into a messy bun, she wasn't wearing any makeup, and she was dressed in jeans and her favorite old hoodie, with a simple pair of white sneakers on her feet. While clean, she still kind of felt like the same bedraggled waif she'd been out in the Mexican jungle.

"I'd love to go out to dinner, but I'm going to need to go home to shower and change," she said, already running through outfits in her mind. Outfits that would make her look even half as pretty as Zander seemed to think she was.

"You look perfect just as you are."

"Are you patronizing me, Zandy?" she demanded, deliberately using Scarlett's childhood nickname for her brother because she knew she'd get a reaction out of him.

As predicted, his eyes narrowed and he leaned in close, his hands braced on either side of the doorframe as he crowded her. "What did you call me, sassy girl?"

"You prefer ghost man instead?" she asked with a sweetly innocent smile. While she knew the nickname had bothered him at first, she also knew that things had changed and it wouldn't hurt him any longer. It was weird, but in a good way, being able to read someone so clearly.

"You're going to pay for that one, baby girl." With that, his hands moved so fast they were nothing but blurs, and then they were on the sides of her stomach tickling her.

There was only one way he could know that she was ticklish, and her friend was going to pay for passing along that little tidbit to her twin brother.

"Stop!" she squealed as she squirmed in her seat, laughing hysterically as she tried to squiggle out of the way of Zander's relentless fingers.

"Not so funny now, are you, sassy girl?" Zander teased as he continued tickling her.

"Okay, okay! You win, I won't call you Zandy anymore!"

"Oh, that was too easy, baby girl. I thought you'd put up so much more of a fight." Zander's fingertips caught the tears of laughter streaming down her cheeks.

"I only promised not to call you Zandy, I'm sure I can think up plenty of other fun nicknames," she said, throwing him a grin.

"You think you're so smart don't you? You're going to be a challenge every step of the way, aren't you, my sassy girl?"

"The best things in life are always a challenge," she shot back.

Smoothing a stray lock of hair off her cheek, he tucked it behind her ear, then palmed her cheek. "You couldn't be more right. And I think I just found the best thing I could ever have hoped for."

With those sweet words his lips met hers, searing them with a claiming kiss that stirred up fire in her body. Lucy felt the same way, she'd been given something so special in this man and she didn't want to lose it.

Please, God, don't let anyone—not even Zander himself—take him from me.

January 26 th

8:59 P.M.

Lucy was giggling as he unlocked his front door, and honestly, Zander couldn't think of a more beautiful sound.

All afternoon her smile had just grown and grown.

The date he'd planned had been simple and fun. They'd been through some heavy stuff in the last week, and he wanted this to be the complete opposite. While he had every intention of making their next date super romantic, this one had just been about letting go of all the stress they were both carrying.

First, he'd taken her to an indoor trampoline park where she'd wowed him with her ability to flip and turn like she'd been doing it all her life. Lucy had admitted she'd taken gymnastics as a kid, after a lot of begging and pleading on her part because her parents were worried that she might have a seizure while in the middle of performing on the beam or bars. Even though she said she hadn't done any gymnastics since she quit when she was fifteen, she was still really good.

Next up was skateboarding. While she claimed she'd never done it before, Lucy had picked it up quickly and even mastered a couple of easy tricks. Skating had been his dirty little secret as a kid. It wasn't something his parents and grandparents approved of, since in their minds it had served no practical purpose. But he'd done it anyway, saved his allowance and bought the skateboard, and kept it hidden in a back corner of the shed, since he was in charge of tending to the garden nobody else went out there anyway.

The woman never ceased to amaze him with her skills and ability to pick things up quickly. What had taken him weeks as a preteen to master, Lucy had managed in just a couple of hours.

He also loved that she hadn't cared that he didn't take her to a fancy restaurant. She was perfectly content with pizza and soda, sitting in his truck watching the waves crash on the shore. Every time he looked at her, Zander wondered how he'd gotten this lucky because he sure as hell had never done a thing in his life that made him worthy of Lucy Elrod.

Now he had her home and with her twinkling eyes and bright smile there was no way he could resist dragging her into his arms a second longer.

"You're stunning, do you know that?" he whispered against her ear as he swung his door shut and pressed her up against it.

Her sharp intake of air and the widening eyes were enough to know she was every bit as anxious as he was to be alone.

"I'm not … bad to look at … I guess," Lucy stammered, a hint of doubt in her beautiful eyes. It was clear his girl still had a tendency to think less of herself because while with the best of intentions, her family had continuously made her feel lacking and not completely capable.

A growl rumbled through his chest because he didn't like the idea of Lucy doubting a single thing about herself. From her face to her body to her brain, she was a perfect ten out of ten. There was not a single thing lacking in her.

"Nobody disrespects my woman. Not even my woman," he warned as he nipped at her neck and then swirled the tip of his tongue over the reddened flesh.

"Mmm, do that again," Lucy murmured, tilting her head to the side to give him better access.

"You like my mouth on you, baby girl?" he asked, taking a step back and smiling as Lucy mewled a protest.

"Yes," Lucy said, voice gone all heated and needy, the sound sending every drop of blood in his body running south.

"Then you strip and let me see every inch of that perfect body."

There was a flare of surprise in her gaze, but it was quickly replaced by desire that only added fuel to the fire raging inside him. The only thing in the world that could quench this fire was the woman standing before him.

Hands trembling a little, Lucy moved them to the hem of her hoodie and pulled it up and over her head, then dropped it to the floor beside her. A delicate lace bra in the prettiest shade of pale blue that matched her eyes cupped both of her perfect breasts, holding them the way his hands longed to. Already he knew how receptive those nipples could be as he sucked them into his mouth and played with them with his tongue and teeth.

A small moan fell from her lips, and he saw a tremor rocket through Lucy's body, and he smirked, loving how he could affect her with just a hungry look.

"You wearing the matching panties, babe?"

"I guess you'll have to wait to find out," Lucy sassed as she kicked off her sneakers. This time he was the one to groan because he already knew the answer from the amusement dancing in her eyes, and he couldn't wait to see her standing there in nothing but scraps of blue lace.

With excruciating slowness—which he knew was precisely the point because his sassy girl gave as good as she got—Lucy hooked her thumbs into the waistband of her jeans and inched them down her legs. By the time she finally stepped out of them he was regretting his decision to ask her to strip for him because he could have had her out of those clothes so much quicker if he'd done it himself.

But it was worth the wait.

She was worth the wait.

It felt like all his life he'd been on hold waiting for her to come into his life. At the time, he hadn't felt like anything was missing, but now he knew he'd been walking around with a gaping hole that this woman had filled.

Filled so completely that he felt whole for the first time ever.

"See, stunning," he said as he took a step closer and cupped both breasts in his hands, enjoying the slight weight of them resting in his palms.

"You make me feel stunning," Lucy whispered. "I know my body is okay, I work hours at the gym to prove to everyone I'm strong and capable, and I've had men tell me before that I'm beautiful … but I'm not sure I ever really felt it until now. Until you. The way you look at me, that makes me feel stunning. It makes me feel gorgeous inside and out."

"Because you are, baby girl. Absolutely gorgeous and stunning and beautiful inside and out." Pulling her delectable body up against his, he ground his hard length against the apex of her thighs. "Ever been skinny dipping?"

Her eyes widened, and her cheeks pinked, and the tip of her tongue ran across her bottom lip as she shook her head.

Dragging his thumb along the path her tongue had just trailed, he asked, "Want to go skinny dipping with me, babe?"

"Skinny dipping?" Lucy squeaked and he could guess that her good girl persona had never done anything like that before. It was one thing to hunt down adrenalin pumping sports to prove to people—and yourself—you were capable, it was another to take risks like the one he was asking her to take with him.

"I've got a pool in the backyard. It's beautiful like a tropical oasis. It's the reason I bought this place even though I didn't think I'd ever use it. I was going to find a way to give it to my sister. There are ferns and a rock waterslide, and a pretty little waterfall. Take this risk with me, babe?"

When Lucy nodded her agreement, he knew she'd just given him the most precious gift possible.

Her trust.

Something he didn't deserve but would treasure forever.

Making quick work of stripping out of his jeans and shirt, he then turned Lucy around and crowded against her back. "This soft skin of yours is going to look so delectable with the moonlight glistening off droplets of water." He murmured the words against the spot where her shoulder and neck met, then dropped a kiss to it.

"You do know it's winter, right? It's going to be freezing," Lucy said, looking over her shoulder at him through heavy-lidded eyes.

"I can guarantee I'll keep you warm, babe. The heat between us is going to make steam, I promise you."

She laughed and he undid her bra and let her breasts spill out into his hands. The laugh turned into a moan when he kneaded the small mounds, tweaking her nipples until they hardened into little pebbles beneath his ministrations.

"Just so you know, babe, I'm keeping this underwear," he whispered in her ear, touching a featherlight kiss to her earlobe before trailing a line of kisses down her spin as he knelt behind her. When he pulled the lacy panties down her legs, revealing the two perfect round globes of her tight backside, he touched kisses to each cheek, then stood, scooping her into his arms as he did.

"I can't believe I'm doing this," Lucy said with a giggle as he carried her through the dark house and out into the yard. It was a beautiful winter night. The sky was a clear, inky black, and a million stars scattered across it, sparkling like diamonds.

"I can. You're so brave and strong, you face everything life throws at you with such determination and pragmatism. You're an inspiration, sassy girl. My sassy girl."

His.

And he was never letting her go.

No one was going to take her from him. Not Zimraan Mostafa, not Raul Castillo, and not the mole at Prey.

Possessiveness filled him as he carried them to the edge of the pool. "You know the only way to do this is to jump right on in."

The warning was the only one she got before he jumped into the deep end.

Seconds later, freezing water surrounded his entire body.

In his arms, Lucy squealed as the cold water enveloped her as well, but she made no move to try to get out of the pool.

Swimming through the water, Zander stopped in the opening of the little cave with water sprinkling down on them from the waterfall that hid it. As predicted, the moonlight reflected on each droplet of water that ran down Lucy's creamy white skin, and he brushed a few droplets off her face as he cupped her cheeks in his palms.

"Don't think I can wait another second to be inside you, babe."

"Thank goodness, because I'm about ready to come just from you looking at me."

Chuckling, he gripped Lucy's hips, lined them up, and slid inside her in one thrust. "Touch yourself, baby girl. Make yourself come."

Lucy's good hand moved to where their bodies joined, finding her bud and circling it as her braced arm rested on his shoulder. "Move, Zander, let me feel you moving inside me."

Not needing to be told twice, his lips found hers as he thrust in and out of her. His pace increased as he felt them both getting closer to reaching the peak, growing almost frantic as Lucy began to buck against him as her orgasm shimmered into existence.

The second she cried out, and her internal muscles clamped around him, he let go. Let pleasure take over, sweeping through him with the force of a tornado, leaving him feeling physically drained but emotionally full.

With the heavens smiling down on them with the myriad of twinkling stars, Zander sent up a silent prayer as he snuggled his girl close.

Don't take her from me.

Don't make me lose her, too.

I can't survive losing has as well.