Chapter 7

CHAPTER SEVEN

January 31 st

11:09 A.M.

Her mind was spinning in a dozen directions all at the same time.

It was kind of like spinning plates. If you weren't used to it, then it seemed hard to keep each one going, not let it get out of control, and manage multiple plates all at the same time. But if you were used to it then it was no big deal, and for her, since she'd been doing it all her life, it was perfectly natural.

Once she got working, she fell into the zone.

Nothing registered around her.

She may as well be on a deserted island for all she knew. That was what it felt like. Just her and her brain.

It was the only thing she'd ever really had for company.

Sure, as a kid, her parents hovered around her constantly as had the parade of nannies and tutors. But they weren't there for company, or not real company anyway. Cassie had learned early on in life that her value was her brain and that it had to be on at all times.

Working hard was what life was all about.

That had been drilled into her.

People pleaser that she was, and a little desperate for whatever attention and affection she could muster from the adults in her life, she did as she was told. Followed the rules. Walked the path her parents had set out for her before she was even born.

Her one little act of rebellion was her imagination.

Making up stories in her head was how she entertained herself as a child, and as an adult it had bled out of her, unable to be contained, into her paintings and writing. For so long that had been her own little secret, one she protected because she knew her purpose in life was to use her brain to the best of her ability, and wasting time on frivolous pursuits like writing romances and drawing sexy pictures was a waste of those abilities.

The fact that her dirty little secret wasn't a complete secret anymore was something she was steadfastly ignoring. Maybe if she refused to acknowledge the fact that the only man she'd ever been attracted to had discovered her secret, then it would kind of be like he hadn't. Honestly, she'd forgotten to even be horrified and angry about the massive invasion of her privacy because she'd been too mortified.

Quickly, Cassie shoved away all thoughts of her sexy babysitter.

Luis was a distraction she didn't need right now. Thinking about him would only slow her down, and lives depended on her figuring out any other clues the mole had left behind.

Not because Luis wasn't smart or an asset. After all, he was the one who had figured out the last clue. The problem was she couldn't think clearly when he was around because she was too busy feeling.

Feeling more than she was comfortable with, things she'd never felt before, things she didn't even understand.

Things that made her feel normal for the first time in her life.

Too bad her first crush wasn't reciprocated. Not only was Luis not attracted to her or interested in her, but he didn't even like her. Everything she did seemed to irritate him, and she couldn't understand why he had seemed so insistent on being there playing bodyguard.

In an attempt not to further antagonize him—and if she was honest with herself also so she didn't embarrass herself—she'd been avoiding him as much as possible. After they'd arrived back at her place yesterday, she'd set up her laptop, gotten to work, and allowed the rest of the world to fade away. After her usual eight hours in bed, she'd gotten up and immediately opened her laptop again.

It was easier to hide behind the excuse of work than to step outside her comfort zone.

That made her a coward, but it was what it was. She had no idea what to do with a man, let alone one who made her feel all tingly and hyperaware of every single thing happening around her. Her skin felt super sensitive, and her eyes wanted to constantly stray to gaze adoringly at the sexy man she'd developed a crush on. The low, kind of rough timbre of his voice somehow managed to evoke the sensation of a warm caress even though that made absolutely zero logical sense.

Weird.

How did people manage to have feelings for someone and still get things done?

If she didn't consciously shove aside the spinning plate of her attraction to Luis, it tried to consume her.

She'd been around people in love ever since she went to work at Prey. The six former SEALs who ran the West Coast office were all married and madly in love with their wives. Any one of them would walk through the fires of Hell themselves for the women they loved, yet they still managed to function like reasonable adults.

She only had a crush on a man who didn't like her, and she was fighting to keep her concentration from wandering.

A mug of coffee suddenly banged down onto the kitchen table making her jump.

Her gaze darted up to see Luis towering over her. There was a scowl on his face, directed at her even though she failed to see what she could possibly have done to annoy him. They'd exchanged no more than a dozen or so words since he'd reminded her with crystal clarity that he was there only because it was his job not because he liked her or wanted to be around her.

What could she possibly have done to make him scowl at her like that?

Since she had no idea what to say, she simply looked up at him and waited to see what he wanted.

"Coffee," he snapped, flicking his gaze to the mug.

"Umm … thanks?" Although she hadn't asked for the coffee, she couldn't deny that she was in need of it. Sleep hadn't been restful last night. Too full of dreams. Lust-filled dreams that left her feeling kind of empty when she woke up.

When he said nothing else, she blinked uncertainly. She just couldn't figure him out. Her experience with men was zero so she had no idea if Luis, in particular, was tricky to understand or if it was just men in general. Either way, it didn't really matter, she couldn't get a read on Luis, and while this wasn't unusual for her—she was much more comfortable in a lab or tapping away at her computer than she was dealing with people—it was unsettling.

Since it didn't appear Luis had more to say, she shifted her gaze back to her screen and resumed what she'd been doing. Running the video clip the mole had emailed all four of them through multiple programs she'd created looking for hints to the bombs' locations so they could be found and disarmed before anyone was hurt, or worse, killed.

"Need any help?" Luis asked after several minutes of what felt like stifling silence even though she was doing her best to ignore it.

Surprised, she jerked her head up to find him still standing beside her chair. He looked so good in his black T-shirt stretched across his broad shoulders and molded to his sculpted chest. All she wanted to do was rip that T-shirt off him and trail her tongue along the curves of his muscles.

Cheeks flaming with embarrassment even though Luis had no idea the turn her thoughts had taken, she shook her head. "Umm … no thank you."

Irritation flashed through Luis' dark eyes although she had no idea why her answer annoyed him. It wasn't like he really wanted to help her, at least she didn't think he did, but again, her ability to read this man was totally lacking.

"Don't think I'm smart enough to help, princess ," he sneered, and she reared back in shock.

Is that why he was constantly angry with her?

Because he thought that she thought everyone else around her was stupid?

What an insult.

If he had any idea of the pressure there was growing up with a high IQ, all the sacrifices she'd been forced to make, all the things she'd missed out on. If he understood, then he wouldn't act like being a genius was so easy.

There were so many thoughts, so many emotions, so many words swirling around inside her mind that they all seemed to get stuck, clogging up her throat so nothing could come out.

Angry, hurt, humiliated, confused, and shocked, Cassie found it too hard to process it all, so she snatched up her laptop, shoved her chair away from the table, and ran.

The coward's way out.

But what else could she do?

He'd never understand, nobody did. It was isolating being so much smarter than your peers, and not because she thought she was better than everybody else. She'd never felt that in her life. Never . All she'd ever felt were pangs of jealousy she quickly squashed that other people got to live their lives however they wanted without the burden she had been forced to carry.

Of all the men in the world she had to go and develop her very first crush on, why did it have to be one who thought so little of her?

January 31 st

6:26 P.M.

It never felt good to know you'd been a jerk for no reason.

Well, there had been a reason Luis had been angry with Cassie, it just wasn't a good one. It had nothing to do with her, but he'd made it her problem anyway.

Not cool.

Cassie had been nothing but polite and sweet. Sure, she hadn't been keen on the idea of him staying in her apartment, but he got it. This was her space, where she felt safe and comfortable, and his being there rocked the boat.

Never once had she said or done anything to imply she thought he was an idiot or beneath her. That was all in his head. Just because he knew that it didn't seem to be helping any.

Every time she looked at him, he felt like that same stupid kid who couldn't learn in school no matter how hard he tried. Who wound up giving up on trying because it didn't make any difference.

Who had made choices that had led to consequences he could never take back.

Taking out his old insecurities on someone who had done nothing to deserve it wasn't fair of him, but he had no idea how to stop doing it.

It didn't matter that he hadn't even known Cassie back then, that he was an entire decade older than her and his problems started long before she was even born. She made him feel stupid because he knew how smart she was. Every time she rejected his help, it brought up all the times the other kids had teased and mocked him for being the class idiot.

Let's be honest here, the woman didn't have a mean bone in her body. Despite his surly attitude, and his invasion of her privacy by breaking into her locked room, she was yet to speak a nasty word to him. When faced with an opportunity for confrontation, the woman never took it, she took people pleaser to a new level.

And she wore every emotion she felt on her sleeve.

She was a damn open book.

Her embarrassment, her mortification, her hurt.

That was the one that had kicked him in the gut and left him feeling like the lowest form of low.

Ever since he'd yelled at her earlier when she'd turned down his offer to help, an offer he'd made because he knew she was upset with him and he didn't like it, she'd been hiding out in her room. Hadn't made a peep, hadn't come out for lunch, and had ignored him when he'd knocked on her door earlier.

Usually, he couldn't care less if someone was upset with him, especially a woman. He had fun with the women he was with and treated them well, but he was clear it was casual, and he never allowed it to last long enough to catch feelings.

But for some reason, what Cassie thought and felt mattered, and he was determined not to be the bad guy again when it came to her. The woman got to him, and he didn't care how or why, he just knew he couldn't take a single second longer of her shutting him out.

Time to do something about it.

He'd already made reservations, taken a shower, and dressed nicely in a pair of black jeans and a white button-down shirt. Since this was most definitely not a date, he'd rolled up his sleeves and not gone to too much effort to look like he was doing this as anything other than a peacekeeping mission.

Now, he stood outside Cassie's door feeling uncharacteristically nervous. His palms were sweaty, and his pulse was running faster than it should considering all he was doing was taking a charge out for a meal. Really, he was doing her a favor. Luis had a feeling that if somebody didn't make her stop working and take care of herself, she'd completely forget.

Silly genius princess, he thought ruefully as he lifted a fist and knocked on her door.

As expected, there was no response, verbal or otherwise.

In fact, if he didn't know for certain that she was in there, he would swear he was alone in the apartment. At least they were on the fourteenth floor, there was no way she could have gone out the window.

"Cass, it's time for dinner," he called out.

After a long pause, he was sure he heard a sigh, and then the muttered words, "Not hungry."

"Regardless, you need to eat."

"I'll make something later."

"You'll eat now."

"You're not the boss of me."

Her petulant tone made him laugh. She was cute when she was being all stubborn. "Not technically true. I'm here to take care of you so I am kind of the boss," he said, more to goad her than anything else. At least she was talking to him again, the silent treatment was killing him.

"You're here to make sure I stay alive, I don't think your duties include feeding me." She huffed, and he could feel her indignity coming through as clearly as if they were face to face.

Which he wished they were.

He wanted to see that spark in her eyes that she got when she spoke her mind instead of pretending she was more robot than human and didn't have needs or feelings of her own. Wanted her to realize that she was more than her brain. She was a real person, and she didn't have to be perfect all the time, dedicating every second to her work. It was clear she had interests and passions outside of Prey, and if the locked door was anything to go by, Cassie didn't want anyone to know about them.

"That's where you're wrong, princess. My job is to make sure you're okay, and right now, you're not okay," he said softly, hating it was his fault she was holed up in there hiding. After everything she and her team had been through these last few weeks, the last thing she needed was him being a jerk because of his personal issues.

"I'll be okay," Cassie said, her voice just as soft.

"Look, Cass, I owe you an apology. I've been a jerk and what I said earlier was out of line. I'm sorry. I really am. I let some baggage get the best of me."

"Oh … uh … okay. Well … umm … thanks. Apology accepted."

Luis smiled at the genuine surprise in her tone. It was so nice to be around someone so open and honest. There was no guessing with Cassie. She was an open book and she didn't play games. Different than most of the women he usually gravitated toward, they were flirty, sultry, experienced, not like Cassie at all.

It was refreshing.

"Come have dinner, Cass."

"I'm just finishing off, I'll eat in a bit. Promise," she added like that was all it would take to get rid of him.

Nuh-uh.

Not happening.

"Let me take you out to dinner to make it up to you, Cassie."

On the other side of the door he heard stumbling, the clear sound of something falling, and then a moment later the door was thrown open. Standing before him was his adorably sweet, genius princess. Her hair was twisted up in a messy bun, and she was wearing only bright pink leggings and an oversized hoodie, yet he didn't think he'd ever seen a more beautiful sight.

"What did you just say?" she demanded, shock rounding her big, doe eyes.

"Dinner, princess. It's that meal people eat at the end of the day."

She rolled her eyes, but one corner of her mouth tilted up into a half smile. "I know what it is, Mr. Smart Alec. I already accepted your apology, I'm sure taking me out to dinner isn't in the job description."

Since he had no one to blame but himself for her thinking it was all about the job, Luis speared his fingers through his hair. "Cass, it's not just a job. That's not why I'm here. I took out my frustrations on you and that's not cool. I just want to make it up to you."

"It's not necessary," she hedged.

"Never said it was."

"We could just eat here."

"I'm not a great cook, babe, but if you're willing to risk your health trying something I cook that's up to you."

Indecision was clear in her eyes. "I really should be working," she said, glancing over at her laptop on the bed.

"You can't work all the time, Cassie. In the last few days, you've been blown up twice, it's okay to take a break. Your mental and physical health are important. You are important," he added, but quite sure she was aware of that fact.

"Well …" She chewed on her bottom lip and a surge of lust shot through him. He'd love nothing more than to soothe that lip with gentle kisses, but kissing this woman was all sorts of bad ideas.

So instead, he reached out, wrapped an arm around her waist, and lifted her up until she hung over his shoulder.

Cassie shrieked in surprise, her hands fisting in his shirt as he turned and headed for the living room. "Luis Aguilar, what do you think you're doing?"

"Taking you out for dinner."

"Like this?" She sounded appalled at the idea. "I'm not dressed to go out, my hair is a mess, and I'm not wearing any makeup."

Setting her on her feet, he grabbed her shoulders and bent his knees so they were eye to eye. "You look pretty no matter what you're wearing, Cass, but go get yourself all dolled up. Reservation is in an hour, and it's a fifteen-minute drive."

Her blush and uncertain nod as she turned away and hurried back to her room shifted something inside him. Something he didn't understand. Something he wasn't sure he wanted to understand.

But Luis felt like he'd climbed on a train and it was hurtling toward its destination regardless of what he wanted.