5. Lev—Age 30

Chapter 5

Lev—Age 30

Present Day

The sting from Azadeh’s hand lingers on my cheek. I suppose I should be glad it wasn’t her right hook. Azadeh punches like a heavy-weight boxer.

Her chest heaves, and her eyes blaze fury at me. I’ll need to sleep with one eye open tonight. The fury is nothing new. Azadeh has never looked at me with softness, even when I stepped up and did right by her. But it’s okay because I don’t need her to love me as long as I have her near me.

If only she’d come home one month earlier. But instead of coming here between jobs like she has for the last ten years, she decided to take up residency with the Cinders—three brothers known for barbaric cruelty and ruthlessness. She’d rather take a job with them than come home and be with us.

I’d had to free her from the grip of Alaric and his two psycho brothers. My methods may not have been tasteful, but my reasons were sound.

I adjust the knot of my tie, suddenly feeling like it’s strangling me. “You hungry, Azadeh? I don’t know if they have anything of true sustenance at that debauchery club where you work.”

Azadeh glares at me. “I always knew you were a little fucked, Lev, but now I have confirmation that you’re a fucking psychopath.”

If those words were spoken by a stranger, they wouldn’t garner a reaction because they would be meaningless. But those taunting words coming from Azadeh’s mouth—words from my past uttered to grind me into dust—are like a serrated blade cutting into my flesh. For the first time in my life, her words wound. “Since you believe me to be a psycho, Azadeh, and you’re well aware of what I’m capable of, perhaps you should refrain from poking the bear.”

Azadeh bares her teeth, her lips curling as she tugs against Zeke’s tight hold. After a moment of fruitless struggling, she latches onto Zeke’s arm with her mouth.

“Fuck!” Zeke yells, abandoning his hold on her waist. “You fuckin’ bit me. Jesus, Az! What the hell has gotten into you?”

Azadeh’s eyes flicker as she notices the trickle of blood gliding down Zeke’s forearm, and her anger dissipates.

She gently takes his arm, remorse evident on her elegant face. Her teeth are no longer bared. Her eyes are back to their soft brown, and her fingers trail his flesh with tenderness. “Zeke, I’m so sorry.”

A pang of jealousy churns in my heart like a tornado poised to destroy everything in its path. A part of me longs for her gentle touch, to experience the sensations the brush of her fingertips gliding along my skin would evoke.

But you won’t let her.

The pesky voice whispers in the back of my mind, reminding me that the current status of my relationship with Azadeh is my fault.

Shoving my intrusive thoughts away, I pack them tightly in the many compartments I’ve forged in my fragile mind. I push through with the long-held steadfast resolve that all my shortcomings shouldn’t matter, at least not for her. Azadeh always sees past everyone’s monsters, ready to put her fears aside to discover the shred of goodness buried deep in a person’s soul. But she’s always been too frightened to sit with my demons. All she’s ever offered me is civil tolerance.

“Hellcat,” Cyrus says as he rushes toward Azadeh. He stops dead in his tracks when he sees her dark scowl. “Okay, this isn’t a happy visit. You mad at us, Kitten? Is that why you’ve stayed away all this time?”

“It depends. Did you help Lev?”

“Help him with what? I keep trying to unload that stick out of his ass, but he seems to be very fond of it.” Cyrus chuckles arrogantly and points in my direction. “I mean, look at the fucker. He’s hanging around the house on a Monday morning dressed like he’s going to a wedding at Buckingham Palace.”

I scoff at his remark. “We can’t all mimic the dress code of a junkie on skid row.”

Cyrus glances at his ripped black jeans, combat boots and smiley face Nirvana t-shirt before dragging his eyes to me. “Doesn’t matter what you think. Chicks dig the fit, bro.” He wags his eyebrows. “Don’t forget, I’m the one who bagged Azadeh, and your dick is about to get a disease from the blue balls you’re packin’.”

I want to lash out like a spoiled child at Cyrus’s dig. He’s pouring salt and citrus on a wound that’ll never heal. But it’s true we haven’t been able to get all of her, no matter how much Zeke and Cyrus talk about her multiple orgasms in one night. Had they been able to “dickmatize” her, as they say, to stay with us, my actions wouldn’t have been necessary.

“Your performance last time must not have been adequate, Cyrus. I’ve heard that when some men hit thirty, their libido takes a dive, and they require assistance. I’d be happy to get my physician to write a prescription for you if you think that would help.”

Cyrus’s jaw ticks as his hand glides into his jeans pocket, and he produces his silver zippo. His smile widens like a predator spotting its prey, and he bares his teeth.

In a flash, the wick of the zippo ignites, and Cyrus pounces on me. He grabs my tie, pulling at it until the tip is on fire. “It’s been a minute since I’ve witnessed someone burn. I miss the stench of charred flesh.”

I don’t move as I watch the flame creeping up my tie, almost relishing the image Cyrus paints.

“You’re fuckin’ crazy!” Azadeh shouts.

She sounds like an angel. I’m okay with a miserable demise if it’s her sweet voice carrying me to the devil. There are worse ways to perish.

Azadeh leaps on Cyrus and pulls him off. I roll on the ground to extinguish the flames eating toward my face. She saved my life. After what I did, she still couldn’t bear to see me suffer. Perhaps she does harbor tender feelings for me, even when she adamantly denies their existence.

“Can the two of you tell me what’s going on?” Zeke demands in a frustrated tone. “Y’all are out here acting crazier than usual.”

I rise from the floor and dust the burned threads from my tie before digging into my pocket and pulling out my phone. I open up my email and point the screen toward Zeke. “They’ve got Mona. I thought she was secure in the basement, but apparently, she’s a little like her sister and had a few tricks up her sleeve. She escaped, and the wrong man has her captive.”

“She escaped?” Zeke echoes, dumbfounded. “You had Mona? Here? How the fuck did you keep her a secret without either of us knowing?”

Lev stares at me blankly. “It’s easy to hide when no one sees you.”

I’m so sick of Lev’s sanctimonious bullshit. “Jesus fuck, she sees you. We all see you. This emo nonsense is getting old. Besides, Mona wouldn’t be scared of you. What the fuck did you do to freak her out so bad that she ran?”