8. Dirge

EIGHT

Dirge

S hay pulled back a few inches, and my heart sank. Was she here to tell me they still weren't letting me out? I braced myself for it, even as I hoped with all I had for something else. I wasn't sure when or how, but the wolf was slowly letting me back to the forefront.

Maybe it was her, my mate. The wolf loved the girl, but the bond couldn't be solidified while the wolf was in charge, and he knew it. Even feral, he knew.

And so it was that I was present, lucid , if not in the driver's seat, when she spoke next.

"They don't want to let you out because they're afraid you'll be a danger to the males of the pack while our bond isn't complete."

I bit back the growl that wanted to escape. The last thing she needed was me snarling at her for having the bad luck to be mated to me. I kept it in and kept my eyes locked on hers. She grounded me, when nothing else had for a long, long time.

"But I told them you weren't a danger. You were protecting me, and we could prove to them that you wouldn't hurt anyone. You won't, right, Dirge? "

She stroked my neck, the sensation making me want to curl up in her lap. But instead, I jerked my chin down in a nod. Shay cast a pointed glance toward the camera at my acquiescence, as if proving a point.

"Okay, I know you may not like this, but we're going to show them that you can tell the difference between harmful touch and friendly touch. Kane is going to touch me now, and you're not going to attack him. Because he's our friend, and he's helping us." She spoke with conviction, but the pleading in her gaze was unquestionable, even as my feet shifted anxiously on the cold, biting concrete.

Nothing about this was okay with my wolf. Nothing . We didn't share our mate with other males; it just wasn't done. The Goddess gave us many gifts, and chief among them was a protective streak a hundred miles wide. There was no bridge I wouldn't cross, no fire I wouldn't leap through, and no foe I wouldn't face to protect my mate. Yet here she was, asking me not to give in to that urge.

It was a tall order for a man in control, and I was not that. But she was asking, and I had to try. For her.

I forced my chin down again and focused on her eyes as she stood, releasing her grip on my pelt. The loss of her touch was a wound, but I locked my muscles in place. If she needed my control, I would give it to her.

One step back, another. The tentative threads that bound us stretched between us achingly, until she stopped a scant three feet away. Too close to the Goddess-cursed silver lining this wretched room.

"Kane." She directed the moment, chin held high and palm outstretched. Pride swelled inside me, even as I fought the urge to get between them. My mate was strong , even wounded, and she didn't hesitate or back away from the overpowering alpha who approached. To his credit, he moved slowly, keeping his eyes on neutral territory and his posture relaxed as he extended his own hand.

Watching them link hands felt like a spike being driven through my ribs. I whined. I couldn't help it. My muscles were locked tight, but the wolf didn't understand why our mate would do this, even though I knew why.

"You're doing great, Dirge. So, so well," she soothed, her gray eyes soft and a little damp as she held my gaze. "I don't think this is enough to convince the five, though. Did you know Kane has mated with my best friend? When you and I first met it was at the afterparty for their bonding ceremony. It was beautiful, and the flowers smelled lovely. So many lights, and all the pretty dresses."

Her voice was wistful, and I wanted to give her that beautiful ceremony more than anything. Every flower, every decoration, the best food, and any gown she wanted. Hell, I still had money sitting in accounts from before. She could have every last penny if it would make her smile again.

"Kane, congratulations on your bonding. I don't think I've told you that yet." She squeezed his fingers in hers, and I forced down a twitch. I hadn't forgotten that they were touching, per se, but her words had distracted me. Probably exactly as she intended, smart woman.

"Thank you, Shay. I appreciate you standing up for my mate."

"She's my sister," Shay said simply. "May I offer you a congratulatory hug?"

No.

No, no, no. No hugs. My paws shifted on the cement, my best self-control flagging at the prospect of what was about to happen.

"Of course. You're family now."

Family? My paws stilled again, and I realized what they were doing. Family was no threat, no harm to a wolf. To harm one's own flesh and blood was anathema; no wolf would dream of it.

And as my mate, her family became my own, immediately. Even though I hated the power rolling off the other man, even if I wanted to tear his skin off for daring to look at the beauty that was mine , everything inside me stilled.

Hurting her family hurt her. And no part of me would do that.

I watched as she hugged the alpha, Kane, who I'd watched grow up. The memories came rushing back of the dark-headed boy who laughed too loudly for the responsibilities he would one day bear. The memories shocked me with their clarity. Nothing had been clear except pain for so long.

Until Shay.

The two of them pulled apart, and Shay leapt at me with excitement. "You did it! You did it, Dirge!" She wrapped me in a hug so tight, she nearly choked me. But rather than dislodge her, I pushed her forward, letting her back meet the concrete as I laved sandpaper kisses over her cheeks and forehead.

"Eww, Dirge!" She laughed, the first time I'd heard the sound, and I stopped licking just to listen, to appreciate the unbridled joy of it.

Something fundamental inside me shifted.