31. Shay

THIRTY-ONE

Shay

M y entire body felt like it was floating. There was nothing at all except a tantalizing scent. Cedarwood, with hints of bergamot and something distinctly male and delicious. I wanted to roll around in it, wrap myself up in it like my own personal cocoon on this sea of… Hold up.

I couldn't float. We were in a field. That was illogical.

Wait.

We were in a field, waiting on… our plane. Preflight checks? Yes. So why was I floating? And who was I sniffing?

I opened my eyes, and a concerned, handsome face stared down at me. One I'd seen before in a very hot dream.

And just like that, everything clicked.

The attacker, Brielle, me getting stabbed, Dirge shifting— I gasped and clutched at my chest, but there was no pain, no wound that I could feel, just a torn shirt sticky with half-dry blood. How long had I been out? I really had to stop getting mortally wounded. It sucked.

"Not long, my love."

"I— But the wound is gone. How has it not been long?" I mumbled the first idiot thing that came out of my mouth before clamping my lips shut. I was clearly not fully back with it yet and lay dazed in his arms as I searched his eyes.

Goddess, he was beautiful. He'd probably hate that description—shifter males didn't like anything that poked at their masculinity, as far as I could tell—but it was the truth. His hair was tousled, dark chestnut and straight, almost to his chin. He had olive skin and the most piercing hazel eyes I'd ever seen. And now that I was seeing them in the daylight, I knew without a doubt that the dream had been a mere shadow of the man.

He was stunning and powerful and wholly overwhelming.

"I don't know. It's a miracle."

"Umm…" I tried to bring myself back around to the present, but when he was staring at me so intently, it was hard to focus on anything except my very needy pussy. She wanted him, pronto.

Chill out, Shay. It's not a good look to be drooling over him while you're covered in blood.

"A miracle? More like some badass magic. Holy shit, Shay. You got stabbed. It was bad. Blood everywhere, instant shock, you were pale and fading, and you fucking died on us —we were all gutted, by the way—then BAM! Bright lights and holy shit, you're awake again." Leigh's eyes were wide, hair wild as if she'd run her hands through it a hundred times in the minutes I'd been out.

Minutes? It just didn't make sense.

"Leigh, if I died, I wouldn't be talking to you right now."

I scanned the group, waiting for confirmation, but Dirge was still holding me—in his lap, I realized belatedly. When I moved to sit next to him, he held me tighter around the waist, as if I were going to disappear into a wisp of smoke if he let me go.

I mean, I guess if he thought I just died, I couldn't blame him. But that clearly wasn't the case. Hello, I'm still here .

But when my gaze landed on Brielle, and I saw her shell-shocked expression, I started to believe it a little bit more.

"Is everyone okay?" I asked, fingers twining into Dirge's chin-length hair. Even if I did feel awkward sitting on his lap with all our pack mates around, touching him soothed me on a primal level. Anchored me.

Aroused me very inappropriately for the number of our friends staring at us.

"Everyone but the assassin, thanks to you," he said, nodding toward the corpse a few feet away.

I looked only long enough to see that there was, in fact, a dead body not ten feet from where we sat in the grass, before quickly jerking my gaze away from the grisly sight.

"Assassin?" My brain processed slowly, as if I were coming back to the present in a big bubble of molasses or honey.

"Assassin," Gael agreed, from his position kneeling next to the body. He seemed the least rattled of us all, focused on the task at hand and not on whatever had revived me.

Holy hell, had I really died ? It didn't seem possible. I felt fine. Better than fine, actually. Energetic. Ready to take out a dozen assassins.

"He's carrying a sword, the knife he used on Shay."

Dirge growled beneath me at that reminder, so I brought my other hand up to rest on his bare chest, trying to calm him as Gael continued.

"A pouch full of all kinds of vials, possibly poison? To be determined. He's also got a pistol, both wolfsbane and devil's trap bullets, and a sat phone."

I blinked at the laundry list.

"Is he a shifter?" Kane asked from where he was crouched next to Brielle, hand on her shoulder. She had both arms wrapped around her knees, and she couldn't seem to stop staring at me.

"It's harder to tell postmortem once the essence fades, obviously, but I don't think so. He's got pointed ears and magic I've never felt before. The ears narrow it down to elf, goblin—mixed, given he's not green—fae, or… I'm not sure. Pixie, maybe? He doesn't smell like any of those."

"Drakenia guild." Dirge spoke, still holding me tightly yet cautiously, like I was a precious china doll he was scared to break. "Rare to see them this far from Europe, but clearly, the payout was big, since he's here."

I blinked at that. I'd never heard of the Drakenia guild, and I had no idea what kind of payout he was talking about.

"But why would a Drakenia killer be here in Alaska? Do you think they were after Kane, trying to wipe out Alpha Kosta's entire line?"

"He was running straight toward Bri," I said.

"And you paid for my life with yours," she whispered, tears flowing freely down her cheeks. "If it weren't for you, Kane and I would both be dead."

Oh yeah. They'd bonded, which meant when she died, he would too. Shit. My best friend was going to have an even larger target on her back now that they were bonded. It was way easier to take out the high alpha's weaker mate than the most powerful male shifter in the entire world. But knowing that intellectually and watching it happen was very different.

"But I'm okay, Bri. And so are you." I brushed off her tearful appreciation, which wasn't usual for me, but the discomfort I had was growing by the minute, as everyone stared at me as if I were some sort of miracle. I was no miracle, just the same messed-up, shy female they knew and loved despite my idiosyncrasies. And I wanted to keep it that way.

I looked up at Dirge, a silent cry for help in my eyes.

Goddess's hem, he was human. Full, rock-hard abs, stunning eyes, chin-length hair, human . Real, solid, and not a dream .

I mean, he might have been a wet dream, but he was not a figment of my imagination.

"You shifted," I whispered, not wanting to have the conversation publicly, but nobody was moving, and I had to say it.

"I did," he murmured against my hair, tucking me closer and holding me right under his chin. He stroked my back soothingly, as if I were a spooked fawn about to bolt.

Which was fairly accurate, so, wise on his part.

"But the vision?—"

"The vision came true before my eyes, Shay. You, collapsing under the clouds, life force draining away in my arms. Down to the light, every detail was as I saw three years ago."

"Except I'm alive."

"Except that," he said with a nod.

"So that's it? We're free?"

He tensed beneath me and didn't answer. But I didn't have the chance to push further, because the pilots came jogging over.

"Alpha Kane, sir, I'm sorry to interrupt, but we've got a small window in which to get off the ground with this weather. I recommend we load everyone up—including, err, the body—and get back to Pack Blackwater territory to sort this out."

"So not the Kodiak? But they're waiting for us," I murmured.

Dirge shook his head against my hair. "No, it's not safe. You need to be surrounded by pack until we figure this out."

I shoved back from his chest so I could see him better. "We don't have that luxury, Dirge. We need to figure out what's going on with Bri, and heck, I'd like to know what's going on with me too. If Jada can tell us, we still need to go."

Brielle pushed to her feet on shaking legs, but her gaze was firm when she leveled it on me. "No. I've put you in enough danger. You two are going home. Kane can take me to see Jada once you're settled safely back on pack grounds. "

Anger burned through me, pushing away the last of the groggy confusion. I moved to stand, and this time, Dirge let me. He was on his feet a half second later, hand on my waist as he stood at my back. He was solid and comforting, and I resisted the urge to lean back into him. I had to stand on my own two feet right now.

"No. You don't get to just shut us out, not now, not ever. We are your pack, your family , and you're not going through this alone. Leigh and I knew this would be dangerous," I said, surprising myself with my own vehemence. But damn it, she wasn't allowed to martyr herself. I'd been scared and alone, and I would wrap myself around her like a rabid spider monkey before I'd let her go off into danger alone.

"You died , Shay. Dead. No pulse, I checked. You didn't sign up to die for me! And you shouldn't have to!" She was yelling, backing away as if she was about to bolt for the plane, as if that would stop us. But Leigh, with her infinite near-mind-reading senses, was there first.

Leigh wrapped her in a hug, taking the spot Kane had vacated to speak with the pilot and deal with the assassin's body. "It's okay, Bri. She's not dead. Goddess knows how any of this works right now, but she's alive."

I crossed the distance, adding myself to the hug ball. Brielle sniffled into our shoulders, shaking with sobs. When she finally spoke again, her voice was small, terrified.

"I couldn't save her, though, Leigh. I couldn't save her. Her blood is on my hands."

The words made me suddenly aware of my own bloody, sticky clothes. But I'd already hugged her, so I just stayed where I was.

"Her blood is not on your hands. It's on that asshole assassin over there." Leigh jerked her thumb toward the corpse, which was being carried to the plane like a sack of potatoes. "Whoever sent him? Also responsible. You? Not responsible. You're the victim here. Do you hear me? Doctors—even omega ones—can't save everybody. And trying to will drive you crazy."

Brielle bit her bottom lip and looked over at me, the unspoken question hanging between us.

"I agree. This was not on you," I said, holding her gaze the entire time.

She shuddered again, the two of us hemming her in until Kane returned to gently pry her from our grip.

"You should listen to your friends, baby. You're in a position of power now. People always try to tear down those they see as above them. All you can do is lead well and surround yourself with good people." He quickly smiled at the two of us. "And you've already done that."

She nodded, going gratefully back into his arms.

That familiar pang started to hit me, but then I remembered. And when I turned, Dirge was there, eyes glued to me as if I were about to disappear. There was still a small distance between us—it was odd, knowing him as a wolf, but now having him standing before me all manly and muscled—distractingly so—and I was suddenly shy.

He stepped forward, hands clasped behind his back politely as he stopped in front of me. "May I escort you back to the plane? The assassin has been loaded, and Reed bagged up the knife for lab analysis as soon as we can secure a courier."

I nodded and took his proffered hand. When our fingers laced together, something inside me settled ever so slightly into place.