Chapter 9

Hyadum moves around the kitchen with practiced ease. It's fascinating, watching him, and not only because his chiseled body is on full display. I rest my chin on my hands, puzzling him out. For all the manly man posturing and possessiveness he's displayed, he's kept his word.

He hasn't touched me, other than just now, in his bedroom. My wrist still burns with the memory of his fingers around it.

Even more puzzling is how well he seems to know his way around the kitchen. Which is probably sexist, but it's so at odds with my assumptions about this place… goes to show I shouldn't make assumptions.

"When did you learn to cook?" The question is out before I can stop it, and Hyadum turns toward me for a moment before resuming his mixing and chopping.

"We all learn." A small shrug. "A warrior is often out on patrol, and knowing how to make an edible meal is an important skill."

"But this is…" I trail off, sleepiness tugging any clever banter out of reach. "This is more than an edible meal," I finally finish.

His cheek jerks up as he smiles. The expression softens his whole face, making him all the more interesting. "I admit, coruscant, I have an ulterior motive."

My whole body clenches, my heart speeding up.

"Oh?" I shoot for disinterested, but any fool would be able to tell I'm on the verge of flight or fight.

"Mmhmm."

"What's the ulterior motive?"

"To make sure you have enough strength today." The look he tosses over his shoulder at me is heated, and my body responds instantly. "You'll need it."

I inhale deeply, trying to calm my racing heart. Why does that simple admission make me think of his bedroom? Of his hands on my body? Damn this fate thing.

"You'll need it, because you're likely to run yourself ragged taking care of everyone else, coruscant."

I close my eyes. A strange, hollow disappointment twangs through me. I didn't want him to be talking about sex—God knows throwing down with Hyadum right now wouldn't be the distraction I need, but an acceptance of forever— but… I liked it. I like that he's teasing me, bantering with me, as he cooks us breakfast.

There are certainly worse ways to start the day than with a hot dude who cooks you breakfast and makes you blush.

"What are you thinking, coruscant?"

I open my eyes to find him standing right in front of me, a heaping plate of food in his hand. A knowing grin lights up his face.

"Your cheeks are the prettiest shade of pink," he murmurs, eyes fixed on me.

"What does coruscant mean?" I deflect, taking the plate from him and shoveling food down my throat. I shouldn't care that he thinks I'm pretty. He probably has to think I am, thanks to whatever stupid ass rules determine the fact he thinks I'm his mate.

Hyadum piles food on his own plate, then sits down at the small island counter next to me, so close his knee brushes against mine.

Butterflies explode in my stomach.

Probably ate too much too fast.

"It means brilliant one, shining one. It means I see you, Starbound woman, and I think you are perfect."

I choke on my eggs, and Hyadum huffs a laugh as I sputter, trying to swallow. Trying to get a damn hold on my emotions. No one has ever, ever, said anything that romantic to me. No one has ever said I was perfect.

Before I can recover, he's pressing a glass into my hands.

"Drink, coruscant."

I swallow obediently, trying to regain control of myself.

"I'm not perfect. Hardly." I snort, ignoring the weight of his gaze as he studies me. "I mean, look at me. I have to take care of my sisters, and I have no idea where they are. I'm a mess, I can barely keep myself together—how am I supposed to make sure they're okay?" The last part staggers from my mouth, and I clamp it shut, to keep anything else back.

"You think you are in charge of your adult sisters?"

"I didn't say that." I frown, picking at the still-steaming eggs.

"No, you did not," he agrees.

I cast him a suspicious look.

"You just feel responsible for them."

I let out a long sigh. I mean, I can't disagree with him on that. "I do feel responsible for them. I have been since they were in diapers and our mom left us high and dry with a dad who forgot to feed us regularly. Not that he was a bad dad… just absent minded. I had to step up."

Something tightens in his face. "I understand."

We eat in silence for a moment, early morning sunlight beginning to stream through the windows bracketing the front door.

"I also had to step up," he says slowly. "My father was… complicated. I took over for him here once he could no longer perform his duties. The weight you bear, the responsibility you feel… I understand it. Your sisters will be safe with their mates, though. I know you worry for them, but you have to trust me on this. Have I done anything to make you believe otherwise? Arietis will bring word of them soon. Have faith."

I push my plate away, eyes narrowed. "It doesn't bother you?"

"What?" He rubs the scruff on his jawline, lips pursed as he turns his full focus on me.

"Not having a say. Being forced to… you know," I say, gesturing to myself. "With me. It doesn't make you mad you don't get to choose your… mate?" The word tastes strange on my tongue.

A rakish grin tugs up the corner of his mouth, and before I can draw another breath, he moves. His hands press into the rough wood counter, on either side of me, caging me in. His chin dips down, and I'm caught.

"I would choose you a million times over, coruscant." His breath whispers across my forehead, and I tilt my head up, trying to gauge his sincerity. My heart pounds against my ribs, a rabbit in a trap.

"You don't even know me," I manage.

"I see you, shining one." His gaze heats me, deep down inside, and the liquid slide of desire pools between my legs. His bare chest warms me through the thin shirt I found in the bedroom. "You have the heart of a protector. Think of how you fight me to find your sisters. You could content yourself with staying safe back at my estate, and instead you choose to help the people here. You fight me when I tell you to rest, that the wounded need you. You have the heart of a warrior." His mouth grazes across my forehead, his voice lowering.

A shudder runs through me, goosebumps pebbling across my flesh. God, his lips feel good on me. They leave fire in their wake, and my whole body feels… alive. And in that moment, all rational thought flees.

My hands wind around his neck, and I press my body into him. It feels so good. So right. His lips skim my temple, my cheekbone, and I melt. A rough hand skates across my thigh, kneading the curve of my ass. He pulls back for a half-a-heartbeat, eyes assessing, and an inhuman snarl of impatience sears my throat as I tug his head back down.

When our lips crash together, I burn. My argument against this, against him, against all of it, turns to smoke and ash in the heat of his kiss. His mouth slants against mine, and there's nothing gentle about it. One hand grips the back of my neck, the other hoisting me up onto the counter. A plate crashes against the floor, but neither of us pause. Kissing him is like finding water in the desert.

And it's still not enough to quench my thirst.

Greedy, I press myself into him, wrapping my bare legs around his hips. When I rock, insistent, against his hard cock, his groan drives me half-wild. His hand tightens in my hair, and I nip at his lower lip in response. I could kiss him forever, and it wouldn't be enough. I want more.

When he breaks the kiss off, pulling my head back gently, I near growl at him.

"You do not want this, coruscant."

"Don't tell me what I want." I surge forward, trying to recapture his mouth with mine.

"You will regret it. I heard what you said to Sulen yesterday, and I will wait until you are fully ready to be mine."

"I don't care about Sulen." My voice is louder than I meant, and I wince.

Hyadum pulls away, leaving me cold. His gaze dips down, raking across my body, my still-spread legs. His chest rises and falls on ragged breaths.

"It has only been a day, coruscant. I will not take advantage of the pull between us until you are sure you're ready for forever."

It's that word—forever—that jolts me back into myself.

"Thank you for breakfast," I manage. I hop off the counter and stride from the room.

My pride is bruised, and not only because of Hyadum's rejection.

But because whatever the hell the mate bond is, I'm not immune to it, and I would have given in and fucked him in the kitchen just to scratch an itch.

It's utterly unlike me to lose control, and my head reels.

The strangest part is, I'm not sure I hated it.