Chapter Five

What was wrong with her?

Sloane was stalling. She and Ruger had been here for three hours now. As much as she was trying to convince herself it wasn't because she was waiting around for more glimpses of Captain, and excuses to go inside and see him, it wasn't working.

Okay, in her defense though, Ruger had made a couple of little friends and had been playing non-stop the entire time. She'd even gone and introduced herself to the families of the kiddos, and had a nice conversation with them. She'd been living in Casper with Ryan for so long, she'd forgotten this part—where everyone either knew everyone, or at the very least they knew someone she knew. One of the moms knew Sabrina. Small world!

And to her absolute joy, Ruger kept getting hungry and returning to the table to take bites of food. He even ate half a mud pie, and then asked her to tell Captain that he ate good.

She'd appreciated Captain's ease with him, and him taking time out of his busy shift to make sure they were good.

He had mentioned that people change, and she agreed. He certainly seemed different than the arrogant Captain of her youth.

But…she'd had an opportunity to give him her number, and she'd thought better of it. She'd known what he wanted to ask. The unspoken question had sat there in the air between them, and she could've given him an out and offered her number to him, but she wasn't ready.

She wasn't ready, and Ruger wasn't ready.

It had only been six months since she'd found out Ryan had cheated on her and filed for divorce. The ink was barely dry on the paperwork. Sure, Ryan had moved on quickly, but he'd been dating Naomi for a couple of years before she found out. He'd moved on long ago. For her? She still struggled with her feelings about Ryan some days.

Right now, her focus didn't need to be on giving a man attention. It needed to be on Ruger and his needs. He hadn't signed up for two households, or the manipulation from Ryan and Naomi and her family.

He deserved to have something steady in his life. Sloane showing interest in a shifter, with a Crew and all the complications that would come along with his life, was not what either of them needed right now. Or ever, honestly.

Shifters were a completely different creature, and culture, than that of humans.

Captain had been complicated as a young man. Now? She couldn't even imagine what his life was like outside of Moosey's.

"Getting tired?" she called out, watching Ruger rub his eyes from where he sat on the bottom of the slide.

"No."

"Mmm-hmm. Come on."

"Five more minutes."

"I gave you a ten-minute warning half an hour ago, boy."

Ruger huffed a breath and meandered over to her, his little bottom lip pouted out. She'd cleaned up their table and stacked their empty drink cups to keep at her apartment. Ryan took almost everything for his love nest with Naomi on a long weekend when she'd taken Ruger to her parents' to get some space, and now she was having to slowly replenish her kitchen supplies with each paycheck. The cups helped, and plus they were a very good memory.

She couldn't remember the last time she'd smiled this much in one day.

Captain had done that.

Ruger was sleepily rubbing his eyes again. He slipped his other hand into hers and let her lead him toward the truck. He would be asleep before they left the parking lot, she would bet.

He'd always been a car sleeper.

Feeling buzzed on happiness, she buckled him in, then shut his door and made her way to the driver's side.

"Hold up!"

She looked up to find Captain jogging across the parking lot. She perked up and waved.

He came to a stop in the gravel right in front of her and handed her some white fabric. She opened it, revealing a pair of T-shirts with the Moosey's BBQ logo.

"We haven't ordered kids' sizes, so maybe he can just have one as a sleep shirt or something."

She laughed and assured him, "I'm sure he will want to wear this every day this week. Doesn't matter if it goes down to his knees."

Captain chuckled. He shoved his hands into his pockets and scanned the parking lot.

"You don't have your apron on," she pointed out.

"Oh, yeah, it's the end of my shift. I have someone trained to take the opposite shifts of me. Plus I get some days off now. Shane will make it even easier if he sticks with it and becomes a pitmaster."

Captain ran his hand down his short beard. His eyes were a light silver color right now.

"Your eyes," she said, gesturing to his face.

"Oh…" He cleared his throat and ducked his gaze to the gravel. "The animal gets worked up easy now."

"So some things don't change after all," she teased.

"Yeah, about all that…"

She frowned, confused by his serious tone. "About what?"

"Homecoming night—"

"Oh my gosh, we don't have to talk about that," she said, realizing where his head was at. "Really. It's not something I need to revisit."

"Yeah, but I do. I was a dick after what happened."

Sloane pursed her lips against the urge to ask him to please change the subject. He seemed to need to have a say.

"I freaked out. It was my first time losing control like that, and you saw it. I remember the look on your face when you saw the bear, and I…" He shook his head and rolled it back, looked up at the sky, then back at her. "I hated you for seeing me like that, and for looking at me like that. At least that's what I thought it was. It wasn't hate though. I was embarrassed. Ashamed. I'm sorry."

Okay, she'd been wrong. She had needed the closure on that. It felt good to have the conversation instead of avoiding it.

She forced a smile. "You know, I wasn't disgusted. Just scared. I'd never seen anything like that, and I didn't know what it was like for you. It looked so painful, and then the bear was enormous and I thought you would…would…"

"I would what?"

"Kill me or hurt me. I don't know. There wasn't as much information available to us humans back then."

"Yeah." He shrugged up a massive shoulder and scratched the back of his hair. "I don't regret things on principle. No point. I am what I am, but I don't get a good feeling when I think back on that night. When you showed up here the other day, I felt that shame again."

"You never talked to me after I saw your bear," she said softly.

"I wanted to pretend it hadn't happened."

"Okay, but by Monday I had tried to call you, and text you. I'd had time to process and had worked through my feelings on it, and you pretended I didn't exist anymore."

"I know."

"For three years," she uttered. "I would try to say hi—"

"I know." He cracked his knuckles and then shoved his hands back into his pockets. "I just wanted to say I'm sorry. I was a stupid kid, and I wish I would've handled it differently."

"I have an admission," she said, determined to lighten the mood again.

"Admit away."

"That was my first date."

Captain's face went slack. "No."

"First date ever."

"Shit," he whispered, hanging his head. "Well, it was a memorable one, I'm sure."

She laughed and nodded. "I was so nervous about going to homecoming with you. I'd had such a crush, and the football game had been so fun with you. I remember you bought us nachos to share, and you wouldn't let me pay for my soda, and you opened your truck door for me. You were such a gentleman."

"Until I wasn't."

"Hindsight, we should've made a smarter decision than drinking a bottle of peach schnapps at a field party."

"Yeah, I had been really proud of my control before that. Want to know what set the bear off?" he asked.

"I always wondered."

"Devon Russo kept following you around, trying to talk to you."

"Devon Russo," she repeated. "God, I haven't heard that name in forever."

"I watched him hunting you, watched the look in his eyes, and you kept talking to him."

"If I was, it was just to be polite. I wanted to be around you the whole night."

"Yeah?"

She offered a sad smile for the miscommunication of young people that had messed so much up for them back then. "When you kissed me in the woods? It was a pretty big deal for me."

"Tell me that wasn't your first kiss," he said, and now there was gravel in his voice and his eyes were lighter.

"You made several of my firsts memorable."

"Oh my God," he muttered. He paced away, running his hands through his hair and grabbing it in the back, and then turned back to her. "And then I Changed. I'm so sorry."

"That's enough, Captain Walker. No more apologies for things that happened in another lifetime. Everything happened how it was supposed to happen."

"You really believe that?" he asked.

She shrugged. "I got Ruger. I have to believe it."

Captain glanced at the driver's side door, then back at her. "You're a good mom. I know a momma bear when I see one. He's a lucky kid to have you."

And now she couldn't help her smile at all. Her cheeks were on fire under the compliment and her eyes burned, so she looked down so he wouldn't see how fragile she was.

"Did I say something wrong?" he asked.

She shook her head and a damn tear escaped, making a small splat on the pebbles of gravel at the toe of her flip-flops. "It's just nice to hear a compliment, is all. That was the best compliment a momma can get."

"Can I get your number?" he asked suddenly.

Sloane inhaled deeply and looked back at her white Tacoma. Ruger might already be asleep, he was so quiet. "I'm a mess right now," she whispered, dragging her tear-filled gaze to him. "You know his dad." She shrugged helplessly. "You probably know his step-mom too. They both went to school with us. I am newly divorced, and a single mom. I just moved here, and I don't know what I'm doing. I just know that I have to be enough for Ruger. I can't have anything take my focus away from him, you know?"

Captain nodded, quiet, too-bright shifter eyes on her. "I get it."

"Can Cap come to my baseball game?" a definitely-not-sleeping Ruger yelled at the top of his lungs from inside the truck.

Captain had looked like he was about to take his leave, but froze, eyes on her. "He's playing baseball?"

Feeling out of her element, Sloane explained, "I just signed him up for an every-other-Wednesday league. His first game is this week."

"You said Wednesday?"

"Ummm, yeah. It's just a little relaxed league, teaching them fundamentals. It's not a big deal—"

"Mom got me a new baseball bat!"

A smile cracked Captain's chiseled face. "I happen to have the morning shift on Wednesdays. No pressure," he said, holding his hands up. "But if you want a bigger cheering section for Ruger, I know how to do that really loud, annoying whistle."

"My ex would hate that," she said cheekily.

"He'll be there?"

"With his mistress," she said. "It'll be a big show."

"Mmm. We can make it a bigger show."

She belted out a laugh at the naughty expression he wore. "Shit-starter."

"That part will never change."

"I believe it." She sighed and looked back at her truck.

"Pleeeeease," Ruger begged.

"Pleeeeease," Captain said softly.

Sloane crossed her arms over her chest and tried to hold out, but both of these boys were terribly cute when they begged. "Fine."

"I probably need your number so you can give me the address to the game."

"Mmm-hmm."

He pulled his phone out of his pocket and opened up a new contact form, then handed her his phone for her to enter her information. She did, and he called her immediately. Her phone rang in her purse at her hip.

"Just making sure you didn't give me a fake number," he said.

"You probably have four million numbers in your phone," she pointed out. "Mine isn't that important."

"Oh, we're friends now, Middleson. I'm in the cheering section for your kid. The number is essential."

"Just friends," she said as he began to walk away.

"Of course."

"I need to focus!"

"Sure, sure."

"Captain."

"His name is Cap!" Ruger yelled. Good gah, did her kid have shifter hearing?

"Captain!" she called as he strode for a big, jacked-up silver Ram truck at the edge of the parking lot. "I'm serious! No complications!"

"Text me when Ruger goes to bed," he called over his shoulder.

"Oh my gosh," she murmured to herself, wiping her damp cheeks. She made no sense right now, smiling and crying and questioning everything and also hoping he was being serious about texting him later.

Captain was playing with her, right? Just like in high school. Cat and mouse, and she was the mouse? Or bear and human?

She was a single mom who had been raked over the coals and wasn't even recognizable, and he was a six foot five, muscled-up titan with his own collector's card and a Crew that was gaining fame, with a big job and the confidence of a predator that knew his exact place in the world—at the tippy-top of the food chain.

Complicated didn't even begin to describe them.

"Is Cap coming to my game?" Ruger asked as she slid behind the wheel.

"Probably not, but maybe," she offered as she watched Captain peel out of the parking lot. The man still had a lead foot.

"Why probably not?" Ruger asked.

Because he was a man, and men didn't follow through? Ruger didn't need to hear that though.

"I don't know, boy-boy. We will just have to see. Either way, we are going to have so much fun."

If she was successful at ignoring the Ryan-and-Naomi show.