Chapter 20

W as it still a date if you didn't technically ask the other person to go on a date with you? Probably not, but Liam was taking it as such anyway, and holy shit, he was on a date with Jasmine. Language and labels seemed like a moot point when they spent more or less all their free time together, and all of their nights in either her bed or his. They'd gone way beyond their initial pact, way beyond friends with benefits. As far as he was concerned, they were well on their way to their hypothetical Hallowedding not being so hypothetical.

He might be getting a little ahead of himself.

Could he have just asked Jasmine on a date? Sure, but they were twenty-four hours out from her being more vulnerable with him than she had been with anyone in years, and the last thing he wanted to do was overwhelm her.

"What are you thinking?" she asked, nestling into his side and scanning the menu in his hand, even though there was one sitting on the table in front of her. He slung an arm around her shoulders so she could snuggle in closer.

Never, in years of dating India, had they shared the same side of a booth in a restaurant, but Jasmine had slid right in beside him like it was second nature.

"I'm torn between the buffalo bites and the mini tacos. What about you?"

"Everything looks delicious," she mused, and Liam's gaze fell to her lips. "Why don't we order both and split them? And maybe a side of crispy potato skins?"

"Good plan. Let's do that."

Sharing dishes: something else India would never have done. Liam wasn't sure why she kept crossing his mind. He supposed if they were counting this as a date, and he was, then it was technically his first date since they'd broken up. There had been the almost-date with Maggie but, after she'd called it off and he realized he wasn't ready, he'd just never asked anyone out again, sticking to casual hookups instead.

Liam had loved India, but things had never felt as natural with her as he did with Jasmine.

"Are you going to tell me where we're going after dinner yet?" Jasmine asked when they'd placed their order.

"Nope. It's a surprise, but I promise you'll love it."

"I assume whatever it is involves getting messy, since you told me to wear clothes I didn't mind ruining." There was an eager twinkle in Jasmine's hazel eyes. Between that and the flecks of gold, it was like her eyes were full of stars, sparkling constellations prettier than anything in the sky.

"Very messy," he confirmed.

"Excellent. I guess that means we get to shower it all off later, and that's exactly why you picked it."

Visions of Jasmine's wet, naked skin beneath his fingers as the shower beat down on them both hadn't been his motivation for picking their first date activity, but it certainly didn't hurt. "That's a bonus."

A server brought their strawberry mojitos, and Jasmine held up her glass. "What are we toasting?" he asked, following suit.

"To orgasms," she announced, garnering a scandalized look from the group at the table beside them.

"To orgasms," Liam agreed, and they clinked their glasses and sipped. The taste of sweet fresh strawberries and tart lime flooded his senses. He didn't drink often, but he couldn't wait to taste the sugar on Jasmine's tongue later.

"This is nice," she said with a happy sigh. "I love spending time in our apartments, but it feels good to get out for a night."

"We should do this more often," he agreed, and she nodded, with a grin that set his stomach fluttering.

Liam fell somewhere between an extrovert and an introvert, but Jasmine was definitely the former. The restaurant wasn't busy. There were maybe a dozen tables full and twice as many empty, but he'd felt the shift in her as soon as they'd walked in. It was like she absorbed the energy of those around her, amping herself up.

He didn't really care where they were, he just liked holding her hand, asking her about her day. Liam opened his mouth to do just that, but Jasmine spoke first.

"How was breakfast with your moms?"

Liam snapped his mouth closed. He knew he shouldn't compare, but… When had India ever shown a genuine interest in things like that? She was a pro at asking all the right questions, but they always felt like more of an obligation than her actually caring. Jasmine's expression was genuinely curious, but it morphed into concern the longer he stayed quiet.

"Are you okay? You're being kind of quiet tonight."

Shit. "Sorry. I'm just happy to be spending the night with you and I'm soaking it in," he said, and her expression softened. "Breakfast was good. My moms are thinking of converting their garage into a sauna room."

Jasmine clung to his every word, and Liam vowed not to let India cross his mind again for the rest of the night. But that became substantially more difficult, an hour later, when they were putting down their forks from the fudge cake they'd shared, and his phone lit up on the table. India's name flashed on the screen, and both Jasmine and Liam just stared at it silently for a moment.

"Are you going to answer it?"

The thought hadn't even crossed his mind. "No. I really have no interest in speaking to her." The words weren't bitter or angry, they were just matter-of-fact. There was no lingering heartbreak in his chest .

The phone rang out and the screen went black. "Has she called before?"

"Not since we broke up," Liam told her, frowning at the phone in confusion. "And I can't think of any reason she'd need to call now. It's not like we have mutual friends or anything."

"Maybe a pocket dial by mista—or not," Jasmine finished as his phone lit up again.

India

(1) New Message

Jesus, had just thinking about her summoned her? He flipped his phone over, screen-side down on the table, and turned his attention back to Jasmine, who was looking between him and the phone, aghast.

"Liam!"

"What?"

"You have to check it."

He cupped her chin between his thumb and forefinger. "Jasmine, darling, I cannot stress enough how little interest I have in anyone else in the world when you're sitting beside me."

Her eyes widened, and she sucked in a breath. "That is a very nice thing to say," she murmured.

"I mean it."

Jasmine gave him a wicked smile. "I know. And I am going to need you to let me thank you properly later by coming in my mouth." A woman at the table beside them choked on her drink, but Liam was getting used to the chaos that fell from Jasmine's perfect lips. His blood thrummed. "But Liam? "

"Hmm?"

"We have to look at the message. It will haunt me for the rest of the night if we don't—I'm too nosy for this."

Liam laughed, shaking his head and unlocking his phone before handing it over without even glancing at it. "Have at it."

"Wow, you really don't care, do you?"

"Not at all."

Jasmine swiped open his messages, and her smile dimmed as she scanned the screen.

"Bad?"

"Oh, no. It's not bad."

She turned the phone to face him.

Hey Liam, hope you're doing well. I'd love the chance to speak to you. Can you give me a call when you have time?

Well, that was vague. And he definitely wouldn't be calling her. His eyes drifted up the screen and he realized why Jasmine's smile had faded. Ah. His last message to India, sent just twenty minutes before he'd walked into their apartment and found her in bed with Bart.

Heading home early. I think I must have caught that cold your dad had at the weekend. Do you want to order from Zerroni's tonight? Love you 3

It was like reading something a stranger had written. It was, in a way, he supposed. Liam didn't think he would recognize himself if he looked back now. That Liam had no idea he was about to turn his life upside down. He had no clue how thoroughly broken he would be for the next six months, how hard he'd have to claw himself out of his own head. He had no idea how long he would spend blaming himself, convinced that he must have done something to make them betray him like they had.

But that Liam hadn't met Jasmine. And present-day Liam was far happier in this moment, tucked in a restaurant booth with his arm around her than he ever had been back then.

Liam opened India's contact page and scrolled down, hitting Block Contact .

"You're not going to call her?" Jasmine asked.

"Nope."

A laugh bubbled out of Jasmine's mouth as she read the sign.

Welcome to Chaos!

"Nice of you to bring me somewhere I'll fit right in," she said, bumping his hip with hers. "What exactly does chaos entail?" Her smile was infectious.

"You'll see, darling."

He left Jasmine by the door as he gave his name to the man at the front desk, who handed him a key and gave him a quick rundown of the room he'd booked. He dangled the key on his finger and beckoned Jasmine over. She wrapped an arm around his waist and raised a brow at the key.

"Chaos is giving kind of seedy vibes."

The key did closely resemble an old motel key, red plastic, printed with the Chaos logo and the Room 2 in black block letters.

The man at the desk cleared his throat. "Just so you know, there are cameras in the rooms."

This just confused Jasmine more. "Without any context, I don't know what to make of that. Kinky or creepy?" she asked Liam as he thanked the man at the desk and tugged her down the corridor.

"Neither. Although if you're into that, we can revisit it another time." He couldn't remember how exhibitionism had scored on her kink list, but he would happily show her off like the work of art she was.

"I know a place we could go for that. Shit, actually, no, I can't tell you about that."

Liam frowned before realizing that probably meant it was something to do with his dad and Maggie. "Jesus Christ. Burning that from my brain. Okay, this is us."

He unlocked the door and felt around the wall for a light switch. He flicked it on and color assaulted his eyes. Paint splattered the room in every color of the rainbow and beyond. Only one spot was clear: the giant canvas hanging on the wall, waiting for them to cover it. A long table held bottles of paint, containers of glitter, bowls full of fabric and paper scraps, glue, and pompoms. There were no paint brushes, but there were plain white overalls and gloves to give the illusion that they might not be walking out of here covered in as much paint as the canvas.

"Holy shit," Jasmine squealed, spinning around and taking the room in. "This is amazing. I swear, this is what the inside of my head looks like at all times—sexy, mustached man and all," she added with a wink. "Do we put these on?" She held up a set of overalls before Liam could respond to the sexy, mustached man comment.

When he nodded, she tossed a set to him and pulled the overalls on over her denim shorts and t-shirt. Liam was around people in overalls every day at work, but he'd never considered them hot until they were on Jasmine's body. He begrudgingly looked away so he could step into his own overalls and, by the time he looked up, she already had a bottle of bright turquoise paint in one hand and a container of silver glitter tucked under her arm.

Most people would look unsure, maybe even question the lack of painting tools, having lost their sense of curiosity and chaos somewhere before high school. But Jasmine wasn't most people. She clapped her hands together, not even flinching when paint and glitter flew all over her overalls, face, and hair.

"So do we have a plan here or are we just going for it?"

And as Liam watched the turquoise paint sliding down her cheek, dripping onto the floor, his breath caught in his throat. Because love wasn't trying to squeeze himself into a box to be the perfect boyfriend for India, and it wasn't either of their faults that they hadn't been right for each other.

Love was beautiful chaos, and he was deeply and desperately in love with Jasmine.