Chapter 7

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adds corn starch to the plot

"Let me see if I understand…" Alexios began, seated upon Pollux's experimentation table in his lab. The hard metal slab—complete with numerous restraints—worked as a centerpiece in the single, large basement room. Shelves upon shelves of unmentionables crowded every wall, except in the corner where Pollux's computer sat, which boasted only elevated shelves crowded with books.

"I'd rather you not," Pollux grumbled as he carefully deposited the specks of gold dust—Kassandra's tear—onto a slide.

Alexios fit his hand against his chest. "Alexios can't have her soul, but Pollux can experiment on her tears?"

"I'm not experimenting. I'm examining. There's a difference."

"The difference is I'm feeling like the victim of a hate crime."

"This is not even remotely within the realm of what a hate crime is, and I dislike that your Alana-inspired internet humor is making light of a subject I have seen intimately on numerous occasions. Why are you even down here?" Pollux glared over his shoulder at the man.

Alexios brightened while toying with his single, long, dark braid. "To bully you, of course. What is your sweet soulmate? Something made of hopes and dreams and love? The fact her presence cancels the effects yours has on more innocent beings is very amusing."

Pollux rolled his eyes. "I'd rather not say."

"I promise not to tell Cael or Alana or anyone else in this domain without your express permission."

Pollux cast a look at the yamachichi—a devourer of emotion, energy, life. At their core, the yamachichi were thieves. The only thing setting Alexios apart from others of his kind was the fact he chose to steal negativity, sparing people from despair.

His constitution could handle the weight where humans might crumble beneath it.

His constitution could handle a lot.

Pollux was uncertain if he wanted it to handle his secrets.

"Do you not trust me?" Alexios asked.

"You are an imp who is going through his invincible stage. No, I don't trust you."

Alexios's smile chilled as he tossed his braid back over his shoulder. "Well, I do appreciate your directness. Will you at least tell me whether or not you plan to visit her tonight? You know, now that you've recovered from the breakdown you had yesterday?"

Pollux's stomach tightened at the very idea of visiting Kassandra if she dreamed tonight. Truthfully, every cell in him wanted to make sure she was okay after this afternoon. He had completed the human marriage ritual. She'd accepted the kitten—even though he could not presently fathom why. He'd stocked up on kitten food. He'd built a tiny kitten palace in the back room. He'd anticipated making his intentions immaculately clear, then taking care of the symbol of his affections until Kassandra was ready to accept them and marry him.

He'd not even gotten a chance to verbalize that she was his soulmate before his brain turned to soup in his skull. Not only that, earlier this evening, she'd run off before he'd had a chance to talk to her alone and try again. He was not faring optimally. Even though both he and Andromeda were maintaining human forms in her presence, he had been so startled by her acceptance of his marriage kitten, he'd nearly shifted back into the appearance he'd come to be comfortable in around his friends.

Did she already know everything about him?

Despite her partial humanity, she was crying sand.

Perhaps she could feel the tinge of her fae heritage. Perhaps she knew, instinctively, everything his tongue tied around when she undid him at the seams. It wouldn't surprise Pollux if a sandman remained uncontained even within a mortal vessel.

If she could knowingly access her powers in spite of her human flesh…or, worse, if she was unknowingly using them…

Pollux didn't want to think about how Cael might respond for the sake of everyone's safety if she were unaware and unable to control her magic.

"Pollux?" Alexios prompted.

"I don't want to talk about this, Meda." Pollux clenched his jaw, closed his eyes, and said, "Xios. I meant Xios."

Alexios hummed and ignored the slip. "I'd like to know why you're babying your mate. Hiding your real self from her, even. It's not that bad. What's wrong with red eyes and sharp teeth?"

Pollux sighed, heavily. "You have never seen my real self, Xios. It is more than red eyes and sharp teeth."

"Well, well. The plot thickens. How terrible is it? Are we talking Kyo from Fruits Basket level?"

"I don't know how to interpret what you just said…"

Alexios chuckled. "Right. Pardon the anime residue. I swear. My genetics are the most condemning amalgamation… Plainly, how terrifying are you as your real self?"

"Please respect my wish to not talk about this, Xios."

"I steal emotions, Pollux. Ignoring boundaries is in my very DNA."

Pollux fit the slide beneath his most powerful microscope and hoped not too many of his own cells had contaminated the sample. He wished he'd had a sanitized pipette. Or…now that he was thinking about it…maybe that would not have been better.

While scientifically ideal, emotionally it likely would have been troubling for Kassandra.

Was she doing well?

Shouldhe see her tonight?

Did he dare cross that threshold now that they were married in accordance with her culture?

If he saw her in the privacy of her dreams, he may be entirely unable to keep himself in check, and he would prefer they be married in accordance with both their cultures before he dared do any of the things his mind often wandered toward where she was concerned.

Also, what if the form his body took in the dream plane—his natural self—didn't appeal to someone raised human?

Humans fought entire wars over their differences.

Hatred came so easily to so many—human and fae alike—but in some ways, it seemed as though the humans had perfected it, practicing ways to justify it.

Kassandra already despised him for reasons she didn't seem open to admit.

What if her justifications bore validity?

What if Andromeda had mentioned what they were and what they did, and she despised him for it? Maybe that was why she'd been so aggressive when they first met and she asked about his job. What if she'd wanted him to confess to his own crimes then, and she was holding the fact he hadn't against him now? What if seeing him in his full dream eater disgrace solidified her distaste? She had accepted his marriage kitten, but perhaps he was missing a human nuance. What if accepting a marriage kitten in the middle of a proposal actually meant the exact opposite of yes?

She had seemed frantic to get the kitten out of his hands before he could fully stumble his way through the words he'd practiced.

"Pollux."

Pollux closed his eyes. In the agony of his own thoughts, he'd forgotten the yamachichi was still tormenting him.

"Where's my lecture?" Alexios asked.

"What?" Pollux grumbled.

"My lecture. I just said ignoring boundaries was in my DNA. That is something deeply concerning. A red flag, if you will. Where's my lecture about how we don't obey our nature if it causes harm to those we care about?"

"Sounds like you've already heard the lecture."

"I'm worried about you."

That caused Pollux to still. And turn. And find Alexios's stormy gray eyes.

"You deal in fear, Pollux. I steal whatever I want. Don't think for a moment I can't feel your unease. It's practically taunting me to take it, but I seem to remember other lectures about stealing things from people we consider friends without their consent." He planted his gloved palms on the metal table behind him and leaned back. "I'm asking questions as a courtesy. I already know you're not well. Can I help, or do you want to pretend that you're still all alone in the world?"

"I appreciate your sentiments, Xios. However, you'll excuse me for understanding too well the duplicity especially an unseelie fae can hold. Caring for me in simple terms does not override mischief. I learned that lesson a long time ago. The only people I trust is fear of my fear…and Kassandra. If she would give me that honor. Only they have the right to be my undoing if my trust is sorely misplaced."

Alexios slipped off the table and adjusted his coat and cuffs. "Point taken." He exhaled a humorless breath. "Don't mind me. I'm just the adopted one in this unusual family unit. It's a unique cruelty to know you're not the favorite of your favorites, but I understand."

"I will tell you the same thing I have told others, Xios." Pollux grabbed his arm, firm, stopping him in place before he could walk out. "Trust is earned. Love is not. I would die to keep you safe. Do not for a moment take my caution to mean you are not precious to me. I have made mistakes before in not making these feelings as clear. Where I can, I do not intend to make them again."

Alexios swallowed, locked his jaw, and nodded. "Go see her. Distance helps anger, but you should know it feeds fear."

"I will take your counsel into consideration." Pollux released him.

And he left.