Chapter 48

Forty-Eight

SARA

After breakfast the following morning,I sat on the couch snuggled up next to Tom as he read the morning paper. I wanted to spend the rest of the day with him, but I’d been on a mission to recondition my body. There were no days off when it came to dancing. I peeled away from his warmth and stood up.

“Where’re you going?” he asked.

“I need to hit the studio.”

He placed the newspaper on the couch and crossed his arms. “It’s the weekend. I just got you back and now I’m gonna lose you again?”

I didn’t want to separate from him either, but there were things I needed to get done. “I need to talk to Alexei.”

He grunted. “I get a strange vibe from that guy. You couldn’t stand him, now you are going to dance with him? I don’t understand.” He shook his head and looked away.

“Tom,” I said, “would I rather it be someone else? Yes, of course. But right now, I don’t have much of a choice. He offered to help me train.”

“Yeah, but at what cost? You think he is doing this out of the goodness of his heart?”

“No, but he is one of the best in the business. If anyone can get me back to where I was, I think it’s him.”

“You can’t just go back to school? Reapply to Juilliard?”

“I don’t want to think about going back to school at this point. And I’m not good enough to make it into Juilliard again anyway. I’d have to train for years. Plus, I don’t even know what it is I really want.”

“What do you mean?”

“Back then, the plan was simple. I’d graduate and become a brilliant dancer. That’s it.”

“So why can’t you continue to pursue that dream?”

“I don’t know if I want that. Dancing on the big stage, it doesn’t hold the same appeal anymore. Without my mother, it isn’t the same. It will never be.”

“You don’t mean that.”

“I do. I want to dance again, yes, but it’s not because I have this drive to make it big. Dancing just makes me happy,” I said, drifting into thought.

“What are you thinking?”

“My mom always thought about starting up her own dance school. She wanted to teach ballet, but she was so busy with me, she was never able to accomplish her own personal dream.”

“You want to open up a dance school?”

“I don’t know. Maybe…someday, I guess. I’d love to give others the chance I had to fall in love with the art. Especially young children. First, I need to get my life back in order. Can’t be a dance instructor if I can’t dance.”

“You’re sure there is nothing I can do to make you stay with me?” he said, flicking his tongue in the air.

“Oh, you’re the fucking devil,” I said, laughing.

* * *

Hours later at the company, I decided to tackle a little bit of work before hitting the dance floor. It was Sunday and no one used the studio on the weekends unless it was crunch time. I was sorting through email when I saw Alexei pass my door. Perfect, just who I need to see. “Alexei!”

When he didn’t answer, I went after him, but he’d already locked himself in his office. I gently knocked on his door. “Alexei, I’m sorry to bother you, but I really need to talk to you.”

Still no answer. I knocked again. “I know you’re in there.”

Finally, he opened the door, his face expressionless.

“Can I come in?” I asked.

We walked back to his desk and sat opposite each other. His eyes filled with impatience.

“This won’t take long. Just want to discuss what happened the other night.”

“Nothing happened,” he responded.

“No need to conceal my embarrassment.”

“What do you want, Sara?”

“Well…” I wasn’t sure I wanted to continue the conversation. This was the Alexei I knew, stoic and rough. It shouldn’t have hit me like an ice-cold bucket of water.

“I don’t have all day, Sara.”

“Well, you said you’d help me.”

“Right. Look, I thought about it and it’s not gonna happen. I’m too busy, especially now. Plus, really, Sara, what’s in it for me? What’s in it for you? Have you thought about that?”

“I’m not sure I understand.”

“You were great once. But that was four years ago. New talent—fresh talent—that’s what people want. The dancers now are lightyears ahead of you. You’d need to be retrained. I don’t have that kind of time.”

I nodded, my head bent down while I looked at my fingers resting on my lap. What he said was true. I was still a good dancer, but I wasn’t great, and you needed to be great to make it anywhere. More than great, actually. You needed to be phenomenal. But I wasn’t interested in joining a company or of making it big on Broadway.

“I’m not looking to land a spot on your show. I just want to recoup a semblance of who I used to be—until I can figure out what it is I really want to do.”

“If you’re not looking to pursue a dancing career, then you definitely don’t need me. I’m a renowned choreographer, not a dance instructor.”

“So, what are you saying? That I shouldn’t pursue dance unless it’s to join a company?”

“I’m saying I can’t help you. Practice or go back to school. You could always do it as a hobby.”

I raised my gaze, my heart heavy with disappointment. “Hobby? Dance was my life, Alexei.”

“I’m sorry to say your decision to quit four years ago was a huge mistake.”

I stood up, thanked him, and walked away.

“Feel free to use the studio whenever you want,” he said, his voice trailing behind me.

I was such an idiot. Believing I’d actually been given a second chance? I plodded back to my office, feeling like a fool. And to have trusted in Alexei? That was even more asinine. What had I been thinking? I should have known he would never agree to help me unless there was something in it for him. I almost couldn’t blame him. He was right. My train had arrived four years ago, and I stood on the platform, watching it pull away. Now it was too late.

* * *

I didn’t tell anyone about my conversation with Alexei. Not even Tom. I was humiliated, dispirited, and in no mood to talk. Tom was freakishly sensitive to my moods, though, and called me later that night just as I was going up the elevator to my apartment.

“You finally going to tell me what’s been bothering you all day?” he asked.

“Nothing’s bothering me,” I droned as the elevator door opened and I hurried to my apartment.

“Try again.”

I stopped and leaned my back against the wall next to my apartment door. I held the phone to my ear, not knowing how to respond. When I hurt, I curled into my cave. That was me caving. “I don’t know what else you want me to say. I told you nothing is wrong.” As much as I loved him and wanted to confide in him, tonight I needed to be by myself with my own thoughts. I had to figure out what the hell I was going to do with the rest of my life. I reached into my bag to look for my keys and cursed.

“What’s the matter?” he asked.

“God dammit. I must have left them on my desk back at work.”

“Left what?”

“My keys.”

“Changing the subject?”

I growled as I marched back to the elevator. “No. Why would I lie about my keys?”

“Jen’s not home, I guess?”

I huffed. “Would I be this upset if she was? Now I have to go back to that place, as if I needed this shit tonight.”

“Hang tight. I’ll come get you and drive you over to the office.”

“Don’t be ridiculous. I’m already in the elevator. I’ll call you when I get back.”

He sighed on the other end and grumbled something inaudible.

Great. He’s frustrated with me.

I’m frustrated with myself too.

He was right to be upset. I was taking my anger out on him.

“Can I see you tonight?” he asked. Seemed he wasn’t ready to give up on me yet.

I shouldn’t have been so difficult on him. Tom was only trying to help. His persistence made me realize perhaps a night out with him was the remedy I needed to get out of my slump. “I need to freshen up first,” I said as the elevator descended to the lobby.

“Take your time. I’ll pick you up later.”

I popped into a cab and headed back to the office.

* * *

Music echoed from the studio as I walked through the corridors of the building. I figured the new dancers were rehearsing so I decided to take a peek. As I approached the studio, my jaw dropped, the air trapped in my lungs. My body trembled with shock and fury. Gliding across the floor in graceful synchronization, Caterina and Francesco worked on their new routine.

Myroutine.

Alexei counted beats as they pushed through every single step.

Mysteps.

“What’s the meaning of this?” I shouted.

All three of them stopped mid-dance to look at me. Alexei was particularly startled.

“Take five,” Alexei ordered as he tried to usher the dancers out of the studio.

“No.” I pointed to the couple. “You wait right there. I need an explanation.”

“You don’t tell my dancers what to do, Sara.”

“I do when it’s my routine they are dancing.”

Caterina and her partner looked back and forth between Alexei and me, perhaps trying to decipher what I meant.

“Your routine?” Alexei tried to play stupid, but I was not about to let this jerk make a fool out of me.

I scoffed. “This is the big secret, hmm? The number you’ve been rehearsing all week behind closed doors?”

He turned to the dancers once more. “Caterina, Francesco, please leave us.”

“No.” I put my palm out to them. “Stay. You should see for yourselves what a sneaky, slimy phony your choreographer really is.” I looked back to Alexei. “This is what you do? How you made a name for yourself? By stealing intellectual property from others?”

“That’s enough.” He grabbed me by the arm, squeezing my flesh until it burned. He dragged me out of the studio toward his office.

“Let go of me.” I tried to pull away, but his grip was too strong. I almost tripped trying to keep up with his pace. “I said let go of my arm. You are hurting me.”

He shoved me through the door of his office, followed behind, and closed it.

I turned to face him. “What do you think you’re doing?”

“I’ve had enough of your attitude, Ms. Hart. I think it’s time someone taught you a lesson.”

“What are you talking about?”

He smiled, his lips dripping with menace.

My heart raced. I didn’t like the look in his eyes and I certainly didn’t like where this conversation was headed. “You better open that door, Alexei.”

“Nah.”

“I’ll open it.” I walked toward him, feigning confidence in my ability to defy his intentions, but he blocked me with his frame and grabbed me by the shoulders as he pushed me into him, my back to his chest. He put his arms over mine and squeezed tight, forcing the air out of my lungs.

“Let go of me. Sick bastard!” I tried to break loose, but his hold on me only grew stronger.

“Ms. Hart, is that anyway to show your appreciation?”

“Appreciation? For what?”

He sniffed my hair, nudging my neck with his nose and inhaling deeply. “Bet your boyfriend likes the way you smell.”

“What is wrong with you? Let go of me!” I squirmed with all my might, trying to at least free one arm or an elbow.

He pressed his lips to my ear. The hotness of his breath was revolting. His arms wrapped even tighter as I tried to get loose. He lifted me higher off the ground; I was barely standing on my toes as he whispered his venom. “Let me tell you something, Ms. Hart. What you saw in there…that was me doing you a favor. I took your mediocre routine and turned it into something worth seeing. You should be thankful. It’s about the closest you will get to a stage ever again. Show a bit more gratitude.”

“You are sick.”

He licked my cheek. “I haven’t really shown you how sick I can be.”

“You want the routine? Keep it. Just let go of me.”

“Giving up so easily? I thought you’d have a bit more fight in you, Sara.” In one quick move, he turned me around to face him, then he pinned me to the wall, his body pressing hard against mine. I was inches from his sweaty face, but I refused to look him in the eyes and turned away.

“You can pretend you don’t want me to touch you, Ms. Hart, but your body said otherwise the other night when we danced. Look at me.”

“No.”

He reached up and wrapped his hand around my neck forcing me to turn my face. Instinctively, I tried to pry his hand off me, but he was much too strong. Breathing heavily, I dropped my arms, and with defiance, arrowed my gaze into his. “I knew agreeing to dance with you was a mistake.”

He bared his teeth and gripped my neck harder, causing me to gasp. “You didn’t resist,” he gritted.

“I was desperate and you took advantage,” I croaked.

He inched closer to my lips. “Oh, you are going to be fun.” He laughed deeply. The sinister intent made my bones tremble.

“You are not going to get away with this.”

“Sara, I’m not going to take you. At least not until you beg me to.”

“Never gonna happen.” I spit on his face.

He didn’t bother to clean it. “You will beg—that I promise you,” he threatened.

A knock at the door startled both of us.

“Alexei!” Caterina shouted. “We are leaving.”

It was my moment. “If you don’t let go of me now, I will scream.”

He didn’t need me to utter another word. His grip loosened and I pushed off him with anger, running for the door. I yanked it open to find Caterina and her partner standing outside. Turning to Alexei, I said, “You will regret this.” Then I stormed off, almost knocking over the two dancers.

* * *

Back at the apartment, I sat on my couch holding a warm cup of tea, my hands still shaking. Jen paced back and forth, her hands fisted at her sides. “You have to call the police, Sara.”

“And tell them what?”

“Exactly what happened. That asshole can’t get away with this.”

“Stealing someone’s routine is not a crime.”

“I’m talking about the way he attacked you.”

“Nothing happened.”

“Are you blind? Have you seen the red marks on your neck? If you hadn’t been interrupted, who knows what he might have done. He is dangerous, Sara. You need to report this guy. God knows how many other women he has violated.”

“You think I don’t want to report him? I could lose my job.”

“Who cares about your job. How could you go back to work after what happened?”

“I don’t know. I can’t think right now.”

“Since when do you care about losing your job? You’ve hated that place ever since you started working there. The only thing keeping you enslaved is the fact you felt you didn’t deserve any better. Well, that’s over and done with. You are not going back.”

A frantic knock on the door turned my attention. “That’s probably Tom.”

“Thank God. Maybe he can knock some sense into you.” Jen walked over to the door to let him in.

“Where is she?” he said as he pushed through the door. He nearly ran Jen over to get to me. He kneeled, cupping my face in his hands and raising my chin. “Let me see your neck.” His voice was unusually calm until he saw the marks. “That asshole did this to you?” He pushed to his feet, his breath ragged. “He’s fucking dead.”

“Tom, I’m fine.”

He snapped his head toward me, “Fine? Are you serious?”

“Please tell her she’s not going back,” Jen told him. “She’s worried about losing her job.”

He shook his head, his face scrunched in disgust. “You plan on going back?”

I placed my tea on the coffee table and stood. “If I quit, he wins. I’m not going to let that prick drive me out of there. He thinks he can threaten me, and that like a scared little bird I’m going to fly away? No. I’m facing him tomorrow, and I’m going to show him he can’t intimidate me.”

Tom turned toward the door. “The hell you are.”

I rushed after him. “Where are you going?”

“To pay Alexei a visit.”

“Babe, no. I can handle this.”

He turned around and put his hands on my shoulders, holding me back. “As can I.” He looked at Jen. “Make sure she gets some rest. I’ll come back later.” He walked out of the apartment and headed for the elevators.

“Tom, please!” I chased after him. “You are going to make things worse. He may not even be there.”

As he waited for the elevator to open, he said, “You don’t understand, do you? What he did…” he paused, “I won’t let him get away with it.”

“What are you going to do, beat the shit out of him?”

“Yes.” The doors finally glided open.