18. Jacob

CHAPTER EIGHTEEN

jacob

O n the drive toward Lacey's to give her a ride to work, I think about last night. Last night was a mess. I still haven't figured out the deal with the flowers. Did Lacey and Caleb get back together? Maybe it was Caleb's attempt to win her back. She didn't seem to be having it.

My attraction to Lacey has been on the rise the last couple of weeks, even though I'm trying to keep my distance. Lacey is everywhere, though. Even when I talk to my parents, the subject of Lacey comes up. My mom raves about how much help Lacey has been at the shop. From the sounds of it, she and Lacey are getting pretty close.

There was a time I wanted the house and the wife and the kids, too. That pipe dream left with Ashley, though. Maybe I'll be able to fix things with her, but it's not looking promising. And if not, I'm not wading back into the dating pool. Even if Lacey and I were both single, even though being in the same room as her makes me feel alive, I still couldn't do anything about it. I'm calling it quits and committing to being a bachelor. The family life just isn't in the cards for me.

Back at Lacey's camper, I knock on her door. I don't hear any movement inside, so I try again, pounding harder. This time I hear a loud thud.

"Just a second!" Lacey calls out to me.

A moment later, the door flies open, and Lacey appears with her bathrobe wrapped tightly around her. I look her up and down, eying the robe. I must have woken her.

"Morning, Gypsy. New work uniform?"

"I forgot to set my dang blasted alarm last night."

Lacey holds one arm wrapped around her stomach to secure the robe. My mind begins to wonder what's under the robe, but I push the thoughts away. Instead, I force my eyes to her bedhead. It doesn't do much to help my wandering thoughts, though, because her hair looks like she was thoroughly...entertained last night.

Shit.

I don't need to be thinking about that, either. I'm here as a friend, giving another friend a ride to work. That's all. I'm focusing on my relationship with Ashley. Let's face it, though. That hasn't been going anywhere fast. Ashley is driving me crazy.

"Come on in," Lacey says, combing her fingers through her wild hair, trying to calm the mess. She gestures toward the bench. "I'll just be a minute."

I climb into the camper and have a seat. Lacey grabs her clothes off the bed and crams herself into the tight space of the bathroom to change. I explore the camper with my eyes from where I'm sitting while I intentionally focus on not thinking about the woman who is probably naked right now, approximately six feet away from me.

The interior of the camper is very feminine. It is cozy, though. I can see why she likes the place. She has it painted in lots of girly colors. I glance over the throw pillows sitting next to me on the bench and can't help but run my hand across them. These ones are funky textures and colors and give the camper a homier feel than the cold, neutral ones Ashley always kept on our furniture.

I guess the same could be said of Lacey and Ashley, too. Lacey is warm and full of life and personality. She doesn't care about current trends. She does what makes her happy. Ashley, on the other hand, bases every decision on what will get her further ahead. She's cold and methodical in the way she does things. To Ashley, joy is nothing more than wall art she'd never dream of decorating her home with.

"So this is how the gypsies live, huh?" I ask loud enough for Lacey to hear me through the bathroom door.

"It's not so bad," she yells back to me. Her speech is muffled, and I assume by the sounds coming from the bathroom that it's from a toothbrush in her mouth. She spits into the sink and continues. "Couldn't ask for cheaper rent, either."

"I can imagine. You know, you've taken over one of my fishing spots."

"What do you mean?"

She opens the bathroom door, dressed now. She's focused on finding her phone and her purse. My eyes slide down her body, liking how good she looks in something as simple as shorts and a T-shirt.

"I used to come down here in the evenings when I didn't have time to hike out anywhere else. I'd fish in the creek back there."

"Oh. Well, I don't guess I'd care if you came fishing. I can hardly stake a claim on the property."

"Maybe I will. You ready?" I stand from the bench as she approaches.

Lacey nods.

"Let me grab my keys."

I stand aside as Lacey locks the camper door, then I follow her down to the truck.

Eyes up! I keep reminding myself.

I don't need to be checking her out. At the truck, I reach past her to open the door for her. I catch a whiff of vanilla off of her that shoots fire straight to my groin. She slides into the seat, and I close the door behind her. I take deep breaths as I walk around the truck, trying to clear the dirty thoughts from my mind. Why am I having such a difficult time keeping my mind out of the gutter around her?

I get in the driver's seat and start the truck. The radio instantly begins playing. Great. A song about sex. I switch the station without even caring what it lands on.

"How're things going at the flower shop?" I ask.

"It's great. Your mom is amazing. I wish my mom was still around."

"When did she pass?"

"My parents passed away when I was seven. My grandparents raised me after."

Another sultry song starts to play on the radio. I reach over and flip the channel again.

"Are your grandparents still in North Carolina?"

"They've passed as well."

"Oh. I'm sorry."

I switch the music away from another suggestive song again.

"My truck was Granddaddy's before he passed. That's why I haven't just dumped the old thing and bought something more reliable. He loved that truck."

I reach for the radio again, this time switching it off completely. Is every song these days about sex?

At the floral shop, I get out of the truck and make my way around the front to open the door for Lacey. She steps out of the truck and gives me a quick hug. I have to consciously make the decision to let her go, my whole body engulfed by the fire of her touch.

"Thanks for the ride," she says.

"No problem," I reply. "So I'm probably not going to be around when you get off work. You might see if Jalynn or someone can pick you up."

I had way too much confidence in myself, agreeing to drive her to work. I'm ashamed of the lack of control I feel around her. I need to keep my fucking distance.

"Okay. Well, thanks."

I watch silently as she disappears through the shop door. I get back in my truck and drive over to my office, a few blocks down. Ashley is supposed to meet me at the office to help out with some paperwork and filing today. She says we need more time together and has been pressing for an answer on her proposal to move back in together. I'm not ready to take that leap of faith. I suggested she come back to work for me instead. That's where it all began, after all. I'd hired her for office help.

At the office, Ashley hasn't made it in yet, but she should be showing up at any moment. I ready the files I want her to handle for me and start going over my inventory of medicines and supplies.

Not much has changed for me over the last couple of months since Ashley's been back. I've tried to forget all of the hurt, but every time I look at her, I'm reminded of her betrayal. My family never liked her, even from the start of our relationship. They put up with her because I loved her. Now, without the rose-colored glasses, I think I see her in the same way that my family has this whole time. It's a struggle to be around her. Even though she's just as pretty as ever, and her little dresses fit her just the same, I don't know if I'll ever be able to trust her again.

I finish the inventory and move over to my computer to begin putting in an order for the supplies that are growing low. I glance at my watch to check the time. Ashley should've already arrived. I log on to my computer and pull up the website I need. Slowly, I add items I need to the cart, making sure I haven't overlooked anything.

I'm not sure why Ashley ever applied to be an administrative assistant for a veterinary office. I was quick to deduce she hates animals. There are plenty of other jobs that would have been more suited to her high-maintenance personality than a vet office.

Once we were living together, she wasn't very tolerant of me coming home in the evenings smelling like my patients, either. She convinced me to shower at the office every day before coming home. That quickly led to having a washer and dryer installed at the office so I could do my laundry at work, too. Mia, the loving sister she is, was quick to tease me about being homeless and only a visitor at "Ashley's place."

The creaking of the front door pulls my attention up from the computer. An hour later than expected, Ashley walks in, shattering the silence. She's laughing and talking to someone on her cell phone. She plops her designer purse on the counter and taps her long, manicured nails on the stack of files waiting for her while she finishes her call.

"I'm so glad you were able to work things out with your family," she croons to the person on the other end of the phone. "I'm sure it's a relief not to lose your business, either."

My ears perk at the comment. Is she talking to him again? Mia tried telling me Ashley was only back because her new man went broke. I dismissed her accusations, but was she right? Had Ashley come running back to me all of a sudden because of the money?

"What is that smell?" Ashley asks, hanging up the phone and setting it face down on the counter.

"What smell?" I ask, my focus back on the computer screen.

"It smells like a barn in here! I don't know how you can stand it."

I let out an audible sigh, already regretting having her in the office today. Everything is such a damn ordeal with her.

"Those are the files I need you to work on," I say, nodding toward the files next to her phone.

"I'll get to them, but right now I need to deal with this smell. I can't stay here with it smelling like this."

Ashley walks back into the storage room. The sound of her rummaging through my things attacks my nerves.

"What are you looking for?" I call out, annoyed.

"Where did you put all of those wall flowers I had in here?"

"I threw them away."

"What?" She pokes her head out of the storage room, horror written across her face. "Why would you do that?"

"I didn't like them. You weren't here anymore. They were just taking up unnecessary space."

"I can't believe you," Ashley says, moving into the kitchen in search of some air freshener to spray around the office instead.

Finally finding a forgotten bottle in the back of a cupboard, she walks through the office leaving a trail of mist behind her. I cough and sputter on the heavy scent as she walks by my desk with her finger still pressed down on the sprayer. She sets the spray down next to the files and finally starts on her work.

A few minutes later her phone buzzes on the counter next to her. She picks it up and glances at the screen. Smiling, she opens the message. She types out a reply, presses send, and lays the phone back down. Seconds later it buzzes again. At this rate, she will never finish the stack of files.

I submit my finalized order and close down the computer. My level of annoyance grows with each buzz of Ashley's phone. I pick up my coffee mug and walk into the kitchen to refill it. As I'm putting the lid back on my mug, I hear the front door creak open again. I poke my head around the corner to see who it is.

"Hey, Freddy," I call out, grabbing my mug and walking back out into the reception area again. "How's things going out your way?"

"Oh, we're doing good. I wanted to come show you our new addition," the gruff man says.

As I approach him, I catch sight of his youngest daughter attached to his leg. I crouch down in front of the girl, who couldn't be more than five years old.

"Hey, Emmaline," I say.

She tightens her grip on her daddy's leg, holding on for dear life as she hides behind him. I reach into my pocket and pull out a piece of candy, offering it to her, and she pokes her head around to see what I have. A grin spreads across her face. In a quick motion, she snatches the candy from my palm and retreats again behind Freddy's leg. I chuckle and stand to talk to Freddy.

"What'd you get?" I ask.

Freddy steps back, pushing the office door open again. His son walks in guiding a tiny pony. I throw my head back and laugh, instantly understanding what has transpired. I crouch back down to Emmaline.

"Did you get a pony?" I ask.

Emmaline grins and bobs her head up and down in an enthusiastic nod.

"She's been begging me for a pony, and I came across this little guy and thought, why not?" Freddy says above us.

"He's a Falabella, right?" I ask, petting on the pony.

"Yep. Sure is."

"I love that you found a pinto, too." I stand and turn, looking for Ashley who is now looking through a file. "Ashley, come see this."

"Sorry, I'd rather admire him from afar," Ashley says. Her nose crinkles. "Actually, I think I'll get out of the way and take these files into the kitchen."

Ashley swipes up her work and leaves the room. I shake my head, frustrated by her inability to even feign interest.

"She's not a big animal person," I say to Freddy, hoping she hasn't offended him.

A buzzing across the room grabs my attention. Looking over to where Ashley was working, I see her phone still sitting on the counter. Another text message, no doubt. I stoop back down to examine the pony. I pull back her lips to get a look at her teeth and rub down her neck and mane. I take a quick look at each of her hooves. Ashley's phone continues to buzz from the counter. I stand and look over at it again.

Turning my attention back to Freddy, I ask, "Do you need a workup done on him or anything?"

"No, he should be good. Just wanted to come show him off to you," Freddy replies.

"Well, he sure is a pretty thing. You gonna take good care of him, Emmaline?"

The little girl nods her head, loosening her grip slightly on her father's leg.

Ashley's phone emits a few more buzzes in the time it takes Freddy to make it out the door. Ashley's still in the kitchen and hasn't seemed to notice yet that she's missing it. I walk over and look down at the phone. Per her usual, the phone sits screen down on the counter. It buzzes again. Finally, I pick it up, deciding to take it to her so I don't have to listen to the constant buzzing anymore. I turn the phone over and glance at the screen. There are eight new messages from Clyde.

Clyde.

The "friend" she'd sent the skimpy photos to.

Without even thinking, I slide my finger across the screen to open up the phone. As Ashley promised, there's no passcode on it now. It opens directly into their messages. I slide my finger over the messages, scrolling up, not even having to stop to read the words on the screen. The few words I catch tell me everything I need to know.

I toss the phone back down and lean over, my hands resting on the edge of the counter for support. Bile rises in my throat, and I will it away.

Same story, different day.

I'm a damn fool for letting her talk me into taking her back. Deep down I knew nothing had changed.

I scoop the phone back up again and march into the kitchen. Ashley is sitting at the table with her legs crossed, the stack of files in front of her. I slap the phone down on the table, making her jump in her seat. Leaning down toward her, I rest my hands on either sides of the stack of folders on the table. Ashley stares wide eyed at me.

"Get your shit together and walk your slimy, lying ass out that fucking door right now!"

Ashley scoots her chair back away from me and stands. I scoop up the files off the table and continue to glare down at her.

"Excuse me?" she snaps back.

"Your act is up, Ashley. I know you're back to talking to him, assuming you ever even quit talking to him in the first place."

"I haven't done anything. He's just a friend. Jacob, we've been over this, and you said you would try."

"I was trying, but I'm not going to bury my head in the fucking sand and pretend like I'm okay with you talking to him again."

I'm shouting now, my anger steadily building.

"You weren't trying. You haven't tried at all. You've been too busy mooning over Lacey to actually try to make things work between us," Ashley yells, matching my volume.

"Get the fuck out of my sight," I say through clenched teeth.

"You don't want to do this," Ashley says, settling her hands on her hips.

"Oh, I'm pretty damn sure that I do."

Ashley stares back at me, pouting, and folds her arms across her body. She must finally see the loathing in my eyes and realizes that her fa?ade is up because she grabs her phone and purse and storms out of the office. Once I hear her car fire up, I collapse in her vacant chair, surprised to find the rage has been replaced with relief. Finally.