1. Madi

Chapter 1

Madi

“No, no, no. Crap, crap, crap. Come on! Please…” I muttered as my car sputtered and slowed to a lurching crawl as I navigated the twisty, turny—and I’m just going to say it—treacherous, pain-in-the-butt mountain road that led up to Cozy Creek, Colorado.

I was born and raised in Colorado Springs, where Ubers were plentiful, public transportation was readily available, and when it was nice outside, I could walk. I rarely had to drive myself anywhere. My car was an old hand-me-down Volkswagen Bug, painted a pretty pale shade of pink.

Our mother had given it to my oldest sister after she’d learned how to drive, who then passed it to my second oldest sister, who had passed it to me when I turned sixteen. Mom had bought it when she hauled her booty out of Cozy Creek ages ago after divorcing my dad. She’d insisted we keep it in the family for sentimental reasons; she called it her freedom car.

I should have known it would never make it up here and taken her new Cayenne, as she’d offered. But I was in a rush to leave, and I didn’t want to go to her place and pick it up. Seeing her meant I’d have to talk about why I was in such a hurry to get the heck out of town, and I just wasn’t ready for the post-mortem discussion of my failed relationship. It was too fresh. And I was feeling too many conflicting things to sound reasonable.

I’d just broken up with the man I’d wasted half of my twenties on, a man my mother wholeheartedly approved of. A man who had no compunction wasting those precious years of time, effort, and love I had invested in him.

But was it really love?

I had thought it was…and felt like it was. But maybe I had been willing to simply accept whatever crumbs he threw my way.

With each mile I’d driven away from him and our life together in Colorado Springs, I felt like I was breathing right for the first time in a really long time. Maybe he wasn’t who I was meant to be with, and holding on for so long had been foolish.

Or maybe I’d broken his heart, and he wasn’t ready to take the next step with me. He cried when I broke it off. He’d sat at our usual table in our favorite restaurant on our fifth anniversary with tears in his eyes as I told him it was over. He had told me I’d blindsided him. Yeah, right.

Blindsided?As if that dinner was the first time I’d broached the question of where our future was going.

It was not the first time I told him I wanted to be married and have children someday. He knew what I wanted from my life. I never hid it. Clearly, our definition of someday was not the same. For me, five years had been long enough.

To be fair, that was the first time I’d demanded an answer from him. It was the first time I didn’t let him off the hook when he said he liked how things were between us and didn’t want to change it. Maybe I was equally to blame for allowing him to lead me on.

But I was currently not supposed to be thinking about him, my life, my feelings, or anything to do with Ross or the fact that I had just turned thirty and was nowhere close to where I thought I’d be at this point in my life. Growing up, I’d thought thirty was so old. I had thought I’d be settled down with a family of my own.

“Damn it.” I yanked the wheel to the side, managing to pull safely off the road before the car died completely with an unceremonious mechanical groan.

I scanned the side of the road, watching the cars pass me by. Was it weird that I felt like I was living a life that wasn’t my own?

Here I was, newly thirty, newly single, and look at me now—a clueless city girl stuck on the side of a mountain road. I was stuck in a broken-down car while people kept living their lives alongside me.

To be clear, nothing was wrong with being thirty—it just felt like an arbitrary marker in time I’d set for myself and failed to live up to.

Did I have kids?No. A house? No. A husband? No. Not even a pet to call my own.

I’d always thought by this time in my life, I’d have it all. I wanted a big family. I wanted to go to soccer games and bake brownies. I wanted to curl up in front of fires and read bedtime stories. Driving kids to school and playdates sounded like a great way to spend my time, dang it. My therapist didn’t have to tell me that I wanted to create the life I’d always wanted to have while growing up; it was glaringly obvious, and I didn’t care.

I had expected to get a proposal at our anniversary dinner. But I didn’t. Instead of a ring, I had gotten a sympathetic smile from a random, eavesdropping waiter. I took that as the hint I’d been missing for five fucking years and broke it off right then and there. Five years on the damn dot. Thank god we had never moved in together. I was pathetic; an unsettling mixture of feeling sorry for myself and feeling utterly relieved that our breakup was as easy as me throwing a suitcase into my run-down Bug and hitting the road. I had nothing to collect from his house aside from a change of clothes, a few books, and a toothbrush, and he had left nothing behind at mine at all. It was all so sterile and uncomplicated. Starting over at square one was not part of my life plan at this age.

Shaking off the memories, I inhaled a deep breath to get a hold of myself, but it was neither calming nor cleansing.

I gripped the steering wheel until it creaked, then closed my eyes tight against my confused jumble of emotions and frayed nerves, breathing in and slowly out until I could catch one of my scattered thoughts.

Now what?

I had to call my grandmother. That was first on the list. I was absolutely going to be late for dinner tonight, and she was a worrier.

I was on my way to her place. She’d sprained her ankle while line dancing with her girlfriends and needed me to help her run her bakery until she got better. Gigi’s Cozy Creek Confectionery will be my new workplace for the next couple of months. I couldn’t wait to get there.

Her accident was unfortunate but a blessing in disguise, allowing me to spend time with her and, at the same time, the chance to get away for a while and clear my head.

Working in Gigi’s bakery was the perfect place to reboot my brain. I’d planned to eat my weight in her delicious petit fours, drink pot after pot of her excellent tea, and spend my time mentally checking out while I reassessed my deluded past perceptions about love and marriage and what I deserved from a man. I needed to decide, once and for all, what I wanted for my future and how I wanted to get it.

Cozy Creek Confectionery was Gigi’s pride and joy. She needed someone she could trust, she had said to me. I’d grown up baking with her—on weekends, holidays, and school vacations. Spending time with her had always been one of my favorite things, so I jumped at the chance.

I’d spent less time in Cozy Creek while I was with Ross, and I regretted it. Gigi wasn’t fond of him. She was always cordial and welcoming, but she felt he wasn’t the one for me. Turns out she was right.

With a reach, I grabbed my handbag from the passenger side floor and dug around for my cell—thank god I had a signal. I’d never make it if I had to walk.

I checked my navigation app. I was ten or so miles away from Gigi’s neighborhood, and it was all uphill. I looked down at my feet and the beautiful black stiletto-heeled boots adorning them, holding back a wince. In these heels? No thanks.

Speaking of Ubers, I tapped to open the app, frowning when I saw none were available. I’d call for a tow truck next. But first, I had to talk to Gigi and let her know where I was. She was probably already starting to worry, and I didn’t want to upset her. I tapped her contact number on my phone.

“Hello, honey. Are you running late? Is everything okay?” I could hear the smile in her voice, and even though this situation was the crappiest ever, I smiled back.

“This day is turning out bad already, Gigi. My car broke down by that big ‘Ten Miles to Cozy Creek’ sign. I will definitely be late getting to your place. Calling a tow truck is next on my list, but honestly, I’m so over this car. It can stay here and rot for all I care, the freaking pink monstrosity. Freedom car, my ass.”

I glanced out the window, and for a moment, my annoyance faded away as I took in the sight unfurling before my eyes. Goodness, it was pretty up here. The sun was high in the late afternoon sky, leaving the forest dark and intimidating, while the mountains clung to the remaining vestiges of sunlight. The leaves had turned into myriad bursts of ochre, scarlet, yellows, and burnt oranges, mixing in with the lush, spiky peaks of evergreen. September in the Colorado mountains was a sight to behold.

“Why is fall so pretty when everything is literally dying?” I asked Gigi, apropos of nothing.

“It’s the way of the world. Things have to die to make room for the new. It’s kind of like your breakup with Ross. It’s time to start over.”

“Ugh, metaphors can be so annoying,” I joked.

“And as for your breakdown. You need to call the Huber, honey,” she tutted.

“Huber?” I purposefully over-enunciated that first syllable, hitting it hard to make sure I had heard Gigi correctly. “Is this one of those weird small-town quirks that I will have to get used to?”

“Uber doesn’t run up here unless you get one at the airport or in the city and start there, but that would have cost you an arm and a leg. I’ll call one of the Huber guys to come get you and call for a tow, too. Tow trucks take forever around these parts, and I don’t want you stuck on the side of the road all night. It wouldn’t be safe. You’re far too cute to spend the night on the side of the highway.”

“I have clearly missed out on the excitement of using the Huber enterprise on my previous visits to town.”

“You know what? Never mind. I’ll call Cole. He’s on his way back to town. I’ll see if he’s close by. Hold on.”

Silence filled the line, and my eyes got big as I contemplated the ramifications of what she was about to do.

Cole?I’d met him a few times. He used to be just one of the three Sutter brothers who lived across the street from Gigi. They were way older than me, always throwing footballs and baseballs around in the street. Who cared about three dumb boys? Not this girl.

But I had spent less time at Gigi’s as I grew out of childhood. Between college, work, and Ross, there wasn’t as much time for lazy weekends and long holiday breaks at her house.

I’d only seen Cole once or twice in the last few years, and I absolutely did not creeper peep on him while he was working out in his garage from the guest bedroom at Gigi’s house. Okay, I totally did, and it was worth it. The man was gorgeous and way out of my league for too many reasons to count.

She clicked back. “We’re in luck. He’s nearby. Watch for a big white SUV with ‘Cozy Creek Fire Brigade’ stenciled on the side.”

“Oh, okay, thanks, but I can⁠—”

“While I was at it, I called a tow truck for you, too.”

“But, Gigi, I can take care of my⁠—”

She cut me off. “Don’t you worry about a thing, honey. I appreciate you coming to stay with me, and I will help you however I can. Please let me.”

“Okay, help away. Thank you.” I let it go, deciding to accept her help. It was nice to have someone taking care of me for a change. It felt comforting and warm to be fussed over. “Of course. I’m happy to be with you. Family helps family and all that. Plus, we don’t spend enough time together, and this will give us the perfect chance to catch up.”

“Pity it took a sprained ankle to get you to take some time off work. It’s been far too long since you came up here to stay for anything more than a dinner.”

“You know how Mom is. We’re always go, go, go at the office.” My mother owned a public relations firm in Colorado Springs, and my two older sisters and I worked for her. I was in charge of the business’s event and party planning aspects. It was exhausting, but I enjoyed it. Making people’s special days the best they could be was the highlight of my job.

Working with my mother and sisters was fun, but I often felt they were far more ambitious than I was. I desperately needed a break and was thankful I had enough savings and my mother’s approval to take all the time I needed. She hired a temp to replace me for as long as it took for Gigi to get better.

“I know,” she muttered. “She was always such a big dreamer, and I’m as proud as can be, but would it kill her to come visit her mother?”

“As long as Dad still lives in town? Yes, I think it actually might.” I huffed out a sarcastic laugh.

My parents were high school sweethearts who married young, with my older sister, Riley, being the unspoken reason for their marriage.

Now, they were divorced and never talked. Dad got custody of Cozy Creek, and Mom got custody of my sisters and me. You couldn’t pay her to step foot in this town unless she was sneaking to Gigi’s house beneath the cover of night for a holiday get-together or if she knew for a fact that he was out of town.

Their relationship was doomed from the start. Mom was all type A determination as she worked to create the top PR firm in Colorado Springs. At the same time, Dad had become the ultimate ski bum. He owned a ski and snowboarding shop in Cozy Creek with my aunt. She ran it, and he traveled the country, hitting the slopes and leaving a trail of heartbreak in his wake.

I could hardly blame Mom for staying away. Dad had done a real number on her—and on his daughters as well. He was not the type to stick around for anything or anyone. I’d be in Cozy Creek for the foreseeable future, and he wasn’t even in the country and had no intention of coming back to see me.

“I know, I know.” Her sigh was sad. “They were just too young, and he was completely wrong for her. But enough about them, for now anyway. Did you hear Cole is divorced? It’s been final for a couple of months now.”

Another shiver shot through my body as my eyes shifted involuntarily to my reflection in the rearview mirror. “Um, no, I did not know that.” I pursed my lips and then bit them to add some color. Looking cute never hurt anyone.

“Yep, he’s single as could be now and still just as attractive as ever. You’re single too. I say it’s time for you to get back out there. He’s a hero, Madi. He’s not just a firefighter. He’s now the chief of The Cozy Creek Fire Brigade.”

“That’s impressive. But I don’t need another boyfriend right now. Do not try to fix me up with him, please. Remember how you spent an hour listening to me rant about the guy Riley and Abigail set me up with last week? I’m not dating anymore, Gigi. I mean it. I’m done. It’s barely been a month, as it is. I need more time to recover. I tried telling them that, but⁠—”

“That’s right, and I told you to let me be the one to set you up next time, didn’t I? Hello? They’re the ones who fixed you up with Ross in the first place.”

They hadn’t listened to me, just like Gigi wasn’t listening right now. I laughed and let her keep talking. Sometimes, it was easier to nod, smile, and do what you wanted, which was basically how I handled my entire life.

Growing up with a bunch of dominant personalities in my family had made me stealthy. I was so stealthy, in fact, that I barely knew who I was or what I wanted anymore, which was super fun to deal with.

“My picker isn’t broken like you girls’ is,” she continued. “I was married to your grandpa for over fifty years before he passed. You’re young and smart and beautiful⁠—”

“You’re sweet to say that, but—” She was going to attempt to fix me up with Cole. I knew it.

“Setting you up with a man like Ross, who was too blind to appreciate how wonderful you are, is a travesty. And I don’t know who you went out with last week but forget about him. I always say good riddance to bad rubbish. Let the trash take itself out, you know?”

“Thanks, but⁠—”

“You’ll see that you’re better off soon enough. Ross never deserved you, stringing you along and making you think he wanted the same things you did. Oh, never mind. Lookie here, how fortuitous. Cole just returned my text message. He’s about five minutes away, so I’ll let you go. Put on some lipstick and check your hair, honey.”

“Gigi!”

“Bye for now. See you at the house.”

“Wait—” Too late, she’d hung up. “Great,” I muttered before blowing an errant highlighted brown curl out of my eye and flipping my mirrored sun visor down to get a closer look at myself.

Apparently, she was going to ignore my newfound vow to forgo dating and fix-ups from my sisters from now on.

Gigi had been right about Ross all along. I wasted too much time on him—five long, fruitless years. The trauma was real, even though my heart wasn’t entirely broken.

Perhaps I wanted to be married with kids more than I had wanted to find the right man to start a life with. But I’d keep that little tidbit between me and my therapist. I didn’t need the judgment from anyone who wasn’t bound by doctor and patient confidentiality laws to keep their dang mouth shut.

No new men in my life were allowed until I met one on my own, the old-fashioned way, like at the grocery store, the park, or maybe a museum if I felt fancy.

Of course, for that plan to work, I’d have to stop having my groceries delivered and commit to leaving my apartment once in a while.

Ugh, whatever.

Maybe I’d never date again.

I pinched my cheeks and fluffed my hair before rolling my eyes at myself in the mirror.

Like you have a chance with Cole, even if she is trying to fix you up with him.

The last thing I needed was to be in another relationship right now. I needed to get my life straightened out. I had to decide what I wanted from a man and not just settle for the scraps he was willing to give me.

Plus, I couldn’t help but think a man like Cole would be too much for me to handle.

He was older than me—eight years, to be exact. He had been married and divorced, and, for that matter, he already had kids, too. Clearly, he was an advanced adult, while I still felt like I was stuck somewhere in the beginning phase thanks to Ross and my delusional determination to make it work with a commitment-phobic man like him who was too scared to build a future with me.

From what I knew about him from Gigi, Cole Sutter was intense, intimidating, and—based on my scientific guest room window observation—hot as hell. If or when I moved on to a new relationship, I needed to find a man who was his opposite.

Someone safe and nerdy. Someone who didn’t require a regular workout schedule and the ability to toss a person over their very broad and defined shoulder to haul them to safety as a job requirement. Not to say nerds couldn’t be hot. I’d met plenty of sexy nerds in my day. In fact, Ross had been one. But somehow, guys like Cole were different. I figured having a life-or-death job could do that to a person.

A horn honked behind me, and I jumped in my seat.

Crap, he was here. I could feel my cheeks get hot as I watched him slow down and ease onto the side of the highway.

Hello, Cole. I hope you’re ready to get awkward.

After one more peek at myself in the rearview mirror, I opened the door and stepped out, waving my hands over my head as he pulled to a stop behind me and opened the door of his truck.

He was wearing a flannel, and boy, did he fill it out to perfection. I bit my lip to stop the drool from forming as he got out and rolled up the sleeves of the dark blue plaid shirt. His biceps strained at the material as his hands worked the fabric up his muscular forearms.

His legs filled out his jeans very nicely, and the big boots on his feet ate up the ground between them as he approached me. His hair was thick and looked as black as ink in the early evening light. And his eyes, which, if I recall correctly, were as blue as the sky, were selfishly hidden behind aviator sunglasses. Pity.

I had given up on men, but that didn’t mean I couldn’t still enjoy the view. My stomach dipped and swirled as I took him in. And I knew, based on the butterflies and my shaking hands, that I would absolutely make a stammering, schoolgirl fool of myself once I opened my mouth to speak to him.

A small, friendly smile tilted up one side of his lips.

Wow, he was still as sexy as ever. And let us not forget, he was now just as single as I was and standing right there.

My body was reacting as if I’d gotten an extra order of hormones along with my fries and Diet Coke at that McDonald’s I stopped at on the way up here. Physical attraction like this, albeit one-sided, was something else. I inhaled a deep, shaky breath.

“You got this,” I muttered. “He’s just a man.”

He was probably used to women throwing themselves at him, and I refused to be one of them.