Chapter 16

CHAPTER SIXTEEN

A Friends with Benefits Situationship

Charlotte

An Uber drops us in front of my childhood home, and I feel ashamed. The lawn is overgrown and clearly not tended to. The house is small and not in the best shape.

“I feel bad bringing you here. My house, it isn’t. . .” I dip my head.

“Whatever your house is, I’m not judging, so relax,” Finn assures. The way he’s reacted to the news of my father not doing well is very unexpected. My anxiety has been through the roof since Cameron’s call, and having Finn here supporting me has meant everything and has kept me calmer than I would’ve been under these circumstances. Still, I am embarrassed for him to come into the house. We don’t really have guests, except for Cameron. Dad has a hard time keeping up with the cleaning. When I come home in the spring, I usually do a deep clean of the entire house. I only left about six weeks ago, but I imagine things have already gotten out of hand.

I nod and swallow. He’s saying he isn’t judging, but I don’t know for how long. I turn toward the house, and we take the couple of steps to the front door. The hall light is on when I open the door, and Cameron is sleeping on our old La-Z-Boy. We had gotten it at a garage sale when I was a little girl. It wasn’t in the best shape but it was comfortable.

Cameron’s eyes open and she startles.

“Hi, sorry it’s so late. We took a standby flight,” I explain.

She slowly moves to a seated position and stands, fixing her short blond hair. “That’s okay. It’s good to see you.” She wraps me up in a hug. “And who do we have here?” she asks, looking at Finn.

“I’m Finn Heaton, a friend of Charlie’s,” Finn replies and he extends a hand to Cameron.

“Aren’t you a fine-looking young man?” Cameron says and she eyes me with a look that means she thinks I’ve done well.

“Finn is a friend,” I counter for clarification.

“Okay, okay,” she replies, lifting her hands in the air. “I got your daddy to eat some chicken broth earlier, but he refused his meds.”

My lips turn down.

“Um… I can wait outside and give you two a moment,” Finn suggests. He turns to leave.

“No, that’s okay. We, uh. . .only have the two bedrooms. I can set you up to sleep here on the couch,” I offer. “You must be exhausted.”

“Thanks.” He nods.

“I should go up to see Dad. Do you want to come with me?” I ask Cameron.

“Sure, doll, lead the way,” she says, extending her hand for me to go first.

“Make yourself comfortable. The bathroom is there on the right.” I point so Finn can see. The house is small, so everything is close to each other.

I head upstairs with Cameron and when we arrive on the second floor, she whispers, “Holy crap, Charlie. He’s a good-looking boy. Is he an athlete?”

Here we go. Cameron knows how Daddy feels about me dating athletes.

“No, he’s a biochemistry major,” I say, which isn’t a lie.

“Wow, handsome and smart,” she declares with appreciation.

“We aren’t together,” I retort for the umpteenth time.

“Ahuh.”

“How bad is he, Cameron? I’m always scared that one day he’s just gonna. . .”

“Don’t say it, honey. I’m here and we’ll take care of him together,” she plans. “You try to get him to take his meds. Put him in a good mood, and then get your cute butt back to school. This is no place for a smart, beautiful girl like you.”

I nod, feeling the sting of tears.

“I’ll go see him. You should go home and get some rest. You’ve done so much for us. I don’t know how I will ever thank you,” I say to her.

“No need. I’m happy to help. Now go see him,” she urges, moving me along.

I enter Dad’s room. He has a lamp on and he’s lying in bed on his side. Despite it being close to 3:00 a.m., he has his eyes open and he’s looking into outer space.

“Hi, Daddy,” I greet him softly. I walk over to him and kneel beside him so he can see my face in his line of vision. “How are you? I missed you. I wanted to come home to tell you how much I love you.”

His lower lip begins to tremble. I reach out and caress his cheek, which is covered in a good amount of stubble.

“Daddy, talk to me. What’s going on?” I ask him.

“I got lonely,” he replies, his lip quivering. His words cause an enormous amount of guilt to rise inside me.

“I’m sorry I wasn’t here, but I’m here now,” I say to him.

“Thanks, Charlie. It is good to see you. I missed you,” he shares.

“I missed you too.” We chat for a while and I get him to sit up. He starts to talk more. His bipolar disorder means he has ups and downs. For some reason I am the one who can usually pull him out of his downs. Except for this one time when he tried to take his life. We got him on different meds after that and things have been pretty steady, but he clearly stopped taking them.

“Daddy, I need you to swallow those pills for me. You’re all I have. I need you,” I plead to him.

My words cause him tears and I wait them out. I remember I have Finn downstairs, waiting on a pillow and blanket from me.

“I’ll be back in a second, Daddy. A friend from college came home with me. I just need to get him some things to get settled,” I explain.

“You brought home a guy?” Daddy asks, intrigued.

“He’s just a friend,” I assure because Daddy looks excited.

“You still seeing that French boy?” he asks.

“Nah, we broke up.”

“Is this the new guy?” Daddy asks. I’m just happy he’s interacting with me. Cameron was right, he needs me. I don’t know how to balance school and taking care of him when they are so far away from each other. A part of me feels like I am failing him for choosing a life at Riverside U and getting my degree.

“No, he’s just a friend,” I tell Daddy. “I’ll be back in a few.”

I hurry to grab a couple of extra pillows and blankets I have in my room. I take them down to Finn, who is passed out, sitting up on the couch.

“Finn.” I nudge him. “You’re going to hurt your neck.”

He wakes. “Sorry, I’m exhausted.”

“I can imagine.” He played a game tonight. The amount of energy that takes seems like a ton. I know how tired I get after meets.

I pass him the pillow and blankets. “Is your dad okay?”

“I hope he’s going to be.” I wrap my arms around my waist.

“Can I ask what his illness is?” he asks, albeit carefully.

“It’s. . .” I blow out a breath. “Not something I usually talk about. But you’re here and you’ve been so kind. . .”

He stands. “Charlie, you don’t owe me anything. If you want to tell me it’s fine and if you don’t, it’s okay too.”

His words marinate in my mind. “He’s bipolar,” I blurt. “Gah, it’s so embarrassing. Mental illness.” I shake my head, feeling overwhelmed.

“Hey.” Finn moves in and wraps his arms around me. My head comes level with his chest and his intoxicating scent.

“You have nothing to feel ashamed about. Mental illness is a medical condition like anything else,” he comforts.

“Only it can cause my dad to act all kinds of crazy,” I reply, laughing sadly.

“It doesn’t mean you love him less. I’m pretty sure my dad suffered from depression, but he went undiagnosed all his life. He’s gone now and he wasn’t always kind to me and my siblings, but I still miss him. I still loved him,” he shares.

Him opening up to me is shocking, but I can’t believe I told him about my father’s illness either. I don’t even know how to react to his revelation, other than saying, “Yeah,” with a sigh because I get what he is saying. Dad isn’t always functioning. I wish I had a parent I could rely on and didn’t have to parent myself, but it is what it is, and I love my father.

We stay holding each other for a beat and I pull my head back. “I should get back to him. I need him to take his meds. He sometimes refuses and then he lapses.”

“Sure.” He takes a step back. “But try to get some sleep too. You must be exhausted.”

“I will,” I assure him. I begin to walk toward the stairs and then I turn around and look at Finn. “Finn,” I call his name to get his attention and he looks up at me. “Thanks for being here.”

He blinks and nods but doesn’t say a word. I head upstairs and hang with Dad for a bit. Then I try to get him to swallow his pills. He does and when I yawn, he tells me to get some sleep so I head to my room. My body is achy, I am so tired. I should shower after all the sex Finn and I had, but I don’t have the energy to stand. I slip into pajamas and look at my phone.

I text Finn.

Me: Please do not tell my father you are a hockey player if he decides to come downstairs.

After a few beats he sends a response.

Unknown caller:: Why?

Me: He hates athletes.

Unknown caller: Ouch.

Me: Sorry. He used to be one and hates the idea of me dating one.

Unknown Caller: We aren’t dating. We are fuck buddies.

Me: If you say that to my dad, he will want to wring your neck.

Unknown Caller: Gotcha. We are a little more than fuck buddies anyway. It’s more like a friends with benefits situationship.

Me: Are you calling me a friend? We started out as enemies.

Unknown Caller: That’s because you ditched me after I was nice to you.

Me: You’ve saved me twice now. How will I pay you back?

Unknown Caller: No need.

Me: Okay, friend. Have a good night.

Unknown Caller: You too.